It's the fa.wking old men's fault ma-en...suppose to kick back and be sad not pretending you have no relatives.

I check out the girls' butt as they pass by...hehehea.. .lol

if a family member or clan member passed. you as the 'xyom cuab' your role is to run errands & thank people.

xyom cuab, this is what you say:

ua tsaug no laus mog,
luag tias, yeeb vim peb tsev xyom cuab,
tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev puas tsev ntsoog
ttog ib teeg, tu ib sawv
los koj tsis cia li, koj tseem xav neej xav tsav,
xav ntsuab xav ze,
koj tseem cab yag cab nco, tshaj ntuj qa nco nto
tuaj pab peb tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

hnub qab nram lub ntsis,
peb tsev xyom cuab txawj ua lub neej ces yuav pauj tau koj tus txiaj tus ntsig no lau
nram qab nram ntsis tsev xyom cuab tsis txawj ua lub neej los,
koj tus txhia ntsha yuav nqa txhia ntsig yuav ris no laus mog.


if you are visting and contibuting money, this is what you say:

txhob ua tsaug laus mog
luag tias, yeeb vim nej tsev xyom cuab, tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev ploj tsev tuag
ntog ib teeg, qaib ib nkog
nyob li txawj ua lub neej ces twb cab yag cab nco nyiaj txiag qas ncos nto
tuaj pab nej tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

yeeb vim, ua lub neej tsis xws luag
muab yam tsis tsheej yam, muab tsi tsis tsheej tsi
twb nqa tsis tau ib yam dab tsi tuaj tauv tsev xyom cuab lub kua muag
no ces txhob ua tsaug, nkim lo tsaug xwb no laus mog

observe. participate. you must be willing to join in and not just sit/stand around. no one is going to judge you or put a microphone and ask you to speak up. overtime, you build confidence and the 'thank you' words will come naturally.

true...couple times i did it..oh golly i was nervous but then after a couple of times it just come naturally..

I don't do much since I don't go to funeral. I only go if they're like close family. 
I usually hand out water napkins and set the table.  The men usually slaughter the animals and cut them.. That's how my families been doing it.. even for weddings. and the women cooks it.  the teenagers just sits there until needed.

They are just there to eat.

we have parties at our funerals  seriously, the elders drink there a$$es off. and gamble at the funeral homes and at the decease's house for at least 3 freakin days right. god i love being HMOOB!!!!party when we are alive and party when we die 

  I remember when my grandpa pass away.  My two auntie married two church guy.  Instead of going around and helping out.  They and their husband just sat there.  If you a church person marry a non-church person just remember you have responsibility!  Don't give me that I go to church so I don't have to do anything crap. 

  This is your family, you are there to greet, welcome, serve, and guard the body.  You are the first one there and the Last to leave.

  Hey, I use to go to church. I married a non-christian.  I decided to go back to my roots and tradition.  I hear people from both side not wanting to learn anything.

  For those who say it will die,  I'm sure our parent and parent's parent said the same thing.  But look at where we are now.

*yawns

I find that elders often find Americanized kids to "get in the way," and usually shoo them away in a "tsk tsk tsk" tone instead of teaching.

 

This reminds me of the chicken or the egg. Who's fault is it if the child was never taught?  

Last point: the last funeral I went to, the elders were drunk, playing card games, while the decease's family was beginning them to calm down, stop playing games, and help out.

What a dumb kid you are!!  When the person that DIED is your immediate family, you are suppose to do NOTHING!! Ruam tiag xwb os...mus nug tej laus meb?  Yog li kuv hais tiag...luag tias niam txiv tuag ces vaj tsev ntuag mos.

Some experience people are in here but some inexperience people also need to learn it is simple thing to do 

damn, i'm good... still remember my pw after all!

oh about the funeral thingy... i personally think it's little to long. cut down everything in half with the english version brief n short just for the offspring to understood would be awesome!

the hmong funeral is sending a mix signal of sad and happy... i'll bet it's confusing for the outsider, dont u all think?

Thanks!  I'll print this out for the young adults!!!

shhheeesh....i m usually drinking....

we stay up all night long. we have uncles, cousin etc that goes and kill the cows. the brothers sit to the side with the og so that they can thank/bow the people that gve money. the daughter help cook, pass out food and stay with the deceased. when night time comes, the daughters pass out blankets for those that plan to stay. most time though immediate family is expectd to be inside to xyov. so the more brother you have the easier it is to divide tasks. because i remenber 2 or 3 of my brother were outside bowing/thanking sets of group and buying/refilling beer/running errands to get things. whereas 3 brothers were inside thanking donators and 2 out killing cows.