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Author Topic: Just Me & My Thoughts  (Read 6532 times)

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Pineapple

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Re: Just Me & My Thoughts
« Reply #15 on: August 30, 2010, 02:05:24 PM »
FYI, u cant just put a mobile home anywhere

My family have gone to look at some lots already...some neighborhood are pretty nice and clean.




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Pineapple

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Re: Just Me & My Thoughts
« Reply #16 on: September 03, 2010, 02:11:13 PM »
It's such a gloomy day...*sigh*

Yesterday my mother was crying silently in her room while she was cleaning.  I went in to comfort her and got a lecture.  It was just another life lecture...abou t being a good person.  I thought to myself:  What did I do this time...???  Actually, I didn't do anything...it was just because my mother over heard my aunt talking about me and how they think I'm going to be an old maid because I a 24 year old spoiled brat.  My mother cried because she just couldn't believe they would say things like that about me...whom my mother raised.  It is an insult.

I told my mother, the only reason they would say such thing is because I am her only daughter.  If I am that bad as they say I am...why did they before wanted to ask me for their sons.  Besides, they have so many daughters who has disregard them as parents and done other things...they just wanted to talk and start rumors.  It has nothing on us though.  Our family is different...we are a loving family.  Father loved us all very much...we're the only women in our family so we must love eachother and also love my brothers.  I'm always thinking about her and dad whenever I do something.  I'm always thinking about my brothers and how I have to be a good sister to them.  Even though we're all adults...we must maintain a good reputation on behalf of my father...for he is what makes us who we are today. 

Today, I was just thinking about my mother and her loneliness.  I love her so much...she waits for me everyday like she waits for my father.  I think I'm going to go buy some food later after work so I can make some of my mother's favorite dishes...somet hing she will like.  And then watch some taiwanese or maybe thai drama with her...yeah that's what I'll do to start the Labor day weekend off.




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LELIA

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Re: Just Me & My Thoughts
« Reply #17 on: September 03, 2010, 04:45:16 PM »
It's such a gloomy day...*sigh*

Yesterday my mother was crying silently in her room while she was cleaning.  I went in to comfort her and got a lecture.  It was just another life lecture...abou t being a good person.  I thought to myself:  What did I do this time...???  Actually, I didn't do anything...it was just because my mother over heard my aunt talking about me and how they think I'm going to be an old maid because I a 24 year old spoiled brat.  My mother cried because she just couldn't believe they would say things like that about me...whom my mother raised.  It is an insult.

I told my mother, the only reason they would say such thing is because I am her only daughter.  If I am that bad as they say I am...why did they before wanted to ask me for their sons.  Besides, they have so many daughters who has disregard them as parents and done other things...they just wanted to talk and start rumors.  It has nothing on us though.  Our family is different...we are a loving family.  Father loved us all very much...we're the only women in our family so we must love eachother and also love my brothers.  I'm always thinking about her and dad whenever I do something.  I'm always thinking about my brothers and how I have to be a good sister to them.  Even though we're all adults...we must maintain a good reputation on behalf of my father...for he is what makes us who we are today. 

Today, I was just thinking about my mother and her loneliness.  I love her so much...she waits for me everyday like she waits for my father.  I think I'm going to go buy some food later after work so I can make some of my mother's favorite dishes...somet hing she will like.  And then watch some taiwanese or maybe thai drama with her...yeah that's what I'll do to start the Labor day weekend off.



people will always say crap to belittle u, but be strong.. disregard what people say just do what is right for u. keep ur chin up.



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Pineapple

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Re: Just Me & My Thoughts
« Reply #18 on: September 16, 2010, 12:39:50 PM »
It's been awhile since I've written in here.

Lately, I've been thinking about myself.  What happened to me?  Sometimes, I don't know myself anymore.  Then I find myself again.  This is weird.  I thought about my mother.  Then came my grandmother.

My grandmother was the only daughter.  My mother was the only daughter.  I am the only daughter.  A little crazy, I guess.

I’ve been drowning myself in all these thoughts about myself.  How am I like?  Could I ever uphold myself to be a good person like my mother and grandmother?  I’ve always gotten annoy at the way my mother lectures me as I was growing up.  Now, I am finding myself thinking more and more like her.  

She tells me,” yus zoo los ntawv yus tus txiv.”  

I question, “yog vim li cas, peb cov pojniam txawm zoo npaum li cas los tsis muaj leej twg khes li?”

She says, “ib puas tsam yam yog tus pojniam ntsim, tus txiv neeg tsua yog muab lub tseg muag los sawv ua yus lub cev.”

I mentioned, “es yog  li ko xwb ces ,tsis yuav txiv li os, vim twb tsis yog kev hlub nes…”

She says, “yog koj hlub koj tus kheej, ces yog koj hlub koj tus txiv.  Li ntawv ces twb yog kev sis hlub lawm los mas.”
I got confused, “kuv tsis nkag siab li…”

She says, “Yog koj ua tau ib tug pojniam zoo thiab coj tau zoo, ces koj tus txiv yuav zoo tuaj xwb.  Nws zoo los yog vim koj, koj zoo los yog vim nws.  Ob leeg uake zoo, ces yog kev sis hlub.  Txoj kev hlub no nws tob tob, yeej tsis muaj leeg twg yuav qhia tau li.”

All the while…this is all in my crazy head and I have become a weirdo talking to myself.


« Last Edit: September 16, 2010, 12:53:03 PM by Pineapple »

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Pineapple

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Re: Just Me & My Thoughts
« Reply #19 on: October 18, 2010, 11:47:40 AM »
And so...the new year is approaching.  He said he is coming to see me.  He's coming to see me during the Hmong New Year.  My heart is pounding...I'm a bit scared, a bit excited, and a bit all too weird.

I never thought I'd be interested in someone like him.  Someone from over there.  Not here.  But my life had turn around as I get to know him even if it was just through the phone.  My heart is a bit yearning to finally see and yet a bit afraid.

What do I do?  What do I say?  I feel so nervous because he called last night and told me he's already got everything planned out and had been working hard on saving for this one flight as if on a dream to reaching a star...astar.. .I suppose me....but I am no star, no I am not.  Yet he says I am.

He'll be arriving mid November and the first thing he wants to do when he settle is to come over and see me.  

I will be okay...I know I will...yet again, I don't know how okay I am now that I've received this news.  It's not like there's anything between us...nothing serious that I know of...just friendly talks...but he may not feel that way and maybe I almost don't want him to feel that way either...I'm doomed.




« Last Edit: October 18, 2010, 12:01:53 PM by Pineapple »

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Pineapple

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Re: Just Me & My Thoughts
« Reply #20 on: October 28, 2010, 03:23:06 PM »
You know, they say you never really know where your significant other will ever be from.  It feels kind of weird hehe...but I've never had a boyfriend before.  I've lived my life with music, art, and surround myself with stories.  I've meet people and made everyone mostly just aquaintances. 

But now, I'm just starting to find myself in a different world.  It's a new beginning and a new journey.  It feels kind of nice like finally stepping foot into a field of blooming flowers as the sweet scent of fresh breeze surrounds my body and being lifted in the air onto the boundaries of sweet romance. 

My feelings for him is slowly growing...ahhh I'm so embarassed sometimes...

I'm such a dork...can't believe it's getting closer...*bonks head*



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