I Suck @ getting girls

[Pure-Noob]

already made similar thread in "General relationship"but didnt find an answer.

I went to my cousin's wedding out of city, and she (the bride) introduced me to her friend, who was the best looking of the bunch. We traded names and then there was a few seconds of silent cause i was nervous and couldnt think straight. She actually tried to save ourselves by asking for my name again, "umm excuse but what was your name again?" I said my name again and she responded back by laughing and turning my name into a flirt line. which we both smiled for a bit then i asked her for her name again and last name. I then said that i dont know many girls with her last name in the city. and then ask how her and my cousin are related, which they said they are college friends. then we went silent, and my cousin talk something with her and while they were talking, i just said I'll be back. then i went to my boys and never came back, just catch eyes throughout the whole day. FAIL

Need help. and No, dont tell me to "Man UP" cause thats the worst advice for guys like us and it never works

[magicofju]

maybe later tonite.....I'm not in the mood to be helpful at the moment, so mayber later tonite, my marathon hasn't run up yet either..

[kysk]

I honestly don't think you suck at getting girls.. If anything, I believe it is difficult to get a girl  But in this situation, what you did was show her that you probably wasn't interested. If you still have her number, you can still hit her up. Some women like guys who play "hard to get"... Don't doubt yourself and have some confidence.

[Hmongol]

You need confidence... perhaps you can start out by changeing your name first.

[Pure-Noob]

You need confidence... perhaps you can start out by changeing your name first.

Confidence doesn't always equal great converstaion, so im sure i need more than just confidence. And not changing my name because she used my name to flirt back at me

[kysk]

If she is flirting, that means she is interested. So why are you stopping now? Go for it! No one is a great conversation starter. But the easiest way to start talking is just about anything around you.. Yes, it is dumb, but it is probably the easiest and best way to go... You: "So what you think of the wedding?" Her: (this can go on for awhile and of course she will go ahead and ask you the same question back. Believe me, women loves to talk and all you have to do is ask a question. If shes not talking then she is the shy type and to be honest, sometimes the best conversation aren't really conversations at all, but the body language.. My boyfriend and I would sit around and do nothing and not talk, but just a smile here and there and even just playing dumb games mean that much more a difference. If you are afraid to speak up, find other ways.. You can always start with the movies = less talk, but alot of time spent together. Action speaks louder than words therefore talking is not the key here.. The key is getting her to go out with you.

hahah, and if you two do get to talking on the phone, there is nothing wrong with asking "So, what are you doing?" and "how was your day".. when my bf and I started dating, that was a conversation starter because we both rarely talked.. haha.. and honestly, I do not see anything bad with it either..

[Pure-Noob]

thanks Kysk:

yea I hear it alot from friend girls that the best route for me to take is to "talk", anything is better than silence. I guess I need to start talking and worry less about saying the wrong things.

[evil-in-deed]

guys like you?... and what kind of guy are you like?...

if anything... talk to girls like as if you were talking to one of your friends... pick a topic and go from there...

do not mistaken friendliness as flirt... its a major mistake many make...

ask her questions that you want her to ask you... make sure its something you can show off with, without seeming like you are...

grab her butt... girls love that stuff...

[Hitokiri]

Yeah I think its confidence that you're lacking. Personally, and I know this is harder then it sounds mostly if the woman is very attractive, but don't look at her as a possible gf just look at her as a possible friend. Take your time. Girls know as much as guys that talking to new people (be it guys or girls) is a nervous experience to take your time and have a line of questions ready. Having questions ready as well a responses is key. Keep eye contact and if you want even lean forward to show interest but not too much or you might get slapped. Haha...If she tells you something that obviously interests her, like a hobby or sport, ask her about it and shwo interest even if its fake. I'm not being mean but there's nothing fake about showing interest in her so if you look at it that way that doesn't make you a liar.

So...

1. Show confidence
2. Show interest
3. Ready your questions and answers
4. Start conversation in what she is interested in - probably easier then trying to explain what you're interested in unless she asks.

Good luck bro! You can do it!

Oh...never tell a girl that you'll be back and never come back. She might hate you for life.

[Pure-Noob]

thank you all, but i have to disagree with grabbing her ass. even i know that's only for mature relationships or club hoes. Also disagree with talking to her as a friend, for me and most others guys have learned that talking to girls as friend will only grant you friendship and not chemical relationship. cause once you're in her friend zone, it's near impossible to get back on her "possible" list. But you're all right, i need to just talk about things i expect her to ask me. thanks all

[8v10un30sun]

Try Google?

[evil-in-deed]

thank you all, but i have to disagree with grabbing her ass. even i know that's only for mature relationships or club hoes. Also disagree with talking to her as a friend, for me and most others guys have learned that talking to girls as friend will only grant you friendship and not chemical relationship. cause once you're in her friend zone, it's near impossible to get back on her "possible" list. But you're all right, i need to just talk about things i expect her to ask me. thanks all

errr... the "friend zone" is only a place we stick people whom we already know we dont want to date but those people just dont understand when to quit it... talking as friends is not the path to get locked into the friend zone...

so if a girl tells you that youre in her friend zone... that just means that she wasnt interested in you in the first place and she had hope that you werent interested in her either...

take the butt grabbing for example...
if you grab her butt when you first met her... she will let you know then and there if she likes you or not...
if youve known her for a while now and grab her butt... she would let you know if she likes you or youre in the friend zone...

[Pure-Noob]

No, I'm not stupid enough to grab the buttocks of girls I don't know. You have bad advice and my advice for you is to not do that

[dejntshiab]

hm... if u really like the girl... ask your cuz if s/he can give the girl's number to you... call her up, apologize for not going back and explain that the reason was because u were too shy, but that you really do like her.  Then ask if she'd like to go to a movie, grab some coffee or lunch... basically, ask her out on a date.

Honesty is the best policy.  If she likes you, then she'll forgive... if not... she'll blow you off... but either way, at least you'll know that you tried your best.

In the future, if you like a girl, just talk and be friendly.  Don't have to be a super conversational ist, or the best anything else... just be yourself.  Then, ask for her number. 

Although I do agree with you that grabbing an unknown girl's butt is NOT a good idea... that's the best way to turn a girl off, get slapped, or go to jail... lol...

good luck, kid!

[kysk]

I agree that the butt grabbing will not work. It will show her what kind of guy you are. And believe me, most Hmong girls do not like that. If my boyfriend first grabbed my butt when we first met, I think I would have broken it off with him because that tells me he only wants one thing. But Pure_noob, you seem like a smart guy to know what is right and wrong, so I am sure whatever you do, it will be the best decision anyway.