Life events and thoughts...

[eclps05975]

Well... I have come to a crossroad of making choices in which it could determine the ultimate destruction of my entire being.  
I just hate it, can't eat, can't sleep, can't think straight.. OMG.. It's driving me nuts.   Trying to stay sane, I stay up all night long while the world around me sleeps and just stare out in space wondering to myself what is the purpose of life anyways?..

Life is sooo.. damn confusing and complicated. Maybe if I wasn't such a blonde, I wouldn't be so confused and be in this place to begin with.  

Anyways... After the aftermath and great destruction of my being, I will officially become a nun. No more of having to worry or think about the opposite sex. Might as well do something useful for a change.. Yeah... Being a nun to the monestary and caring for children. I love children, they are gifts from the heavens. I especially love the little babies, they're so tiny and cute. If I was rich, I'd open up an orphanage for children and care for them until someone adopts them. When I hear about children being abused, breaks my heart as they are so helpless.

Well... just trying to clear my mind of my frustrations.. will come back some other day and talk to myself. lol..    

[eclps05975]

Dear crazy girl diary…  

Another sleepless night… so, I was talking to a GF last night, she tells me “koj mas caag yuav ua sab ntev ntev ua luaj le”. I guess that is a personality trait I can’t shake and when you’re sab ntev ntev kuj tsis zoo ib qhov hab… So, she goes on telling me, you need to learn how to be rude and mean too and stop being so patient with people, koj mas caag yuav ua rua kuv annoyed and frustrated rua koj taag le lawm hab.   And who could really blame her, even I get frustrated with myself sometimes too.   Anyways… I have come to a conclusion and after pondering forever, I have to believe the saying that “the things that don’t kill you will only make you stronger.

Well.. that is it for today. Hopefully I’ll be stronger and be able to come back and write myself. Lol..  

[eclps05975]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZJL4UGSbeFg

 

 

[eclps05975]

Okay... all joking aside from this thread. Seeing things from behind my eyes and knowing the real me.

Sometimes life doesn't always go the way we all plan it to be. It's always filled with unexpected things, some good and some bad. Regardless of all the hard work and effort a person may have put into their life, relationship or marriage, at times when things fall apart and you no longer feel the same or feel you  no longer want to put in the effort to working things out, letting go is probably the best thing to do.   Sometimes instead of continuing on the same path you have traveled for so long, you find yourself starting over again from scratch. Life isn't fair sometimes, but there comes a time in life when we all have to learn to let go when we are hurting too much and no matter what you do doesn't seem to make a difference. The most valuable thing I have learned is to love yourself first, from then will you be able to love others. We all have to respect ourself and not letting others take us for granted. From then will they respect us in return and see what we are worth. We can't always please everyone and not everyone is going to like us, so never try so hard or give too much if you never get much in return. It is important to be happy in order to have a peace of mind and stay sane. If you are not happy in the current situation, regardless whether it is physically, emotionally, financial or whatnot, it'll make things really hard to try and be happy with those around you. Maybe things do happen for a reason, but for whatever reason these things happen, hopefully good things will follow... As all we can really do is have hope.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K0rub5nOfII

[eclps05975]

I am glad that I am able to spend time with my mom as she is one of the most important person in my life. She has taught me to be strong even when I had faltered and failed miserably at things in my life whether it is the cause of others doing or things I have done. That sometimes we rise and we fall, but to never let that stand in the way of getting back on our feet. She has always told me to stand tall no matter what others may say, to believe in myself and I would accomplish anything I put my heart into. She has always been there for me teaching me right from wrong, even though at times we might have a few disagreements here and there. I am glad that my mom is still here with me as I appreciate all the things she has done for me and taught me. I love you dearly mom, happy mother's day.

[eclps05975]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esgB8-_FjWA