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Author Topic: Dislikes about Hmong funeral  (Read 10237 times)

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IsaacsLove

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Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« on: January 09, 2012, 10:46:21 PM »
why does the elder or guy in charge of the funeral, the (thawj xom cuab) want to spend so much money on the what they call the "last supper"? Or people complaining about wanting better food at the funeral home?

For god sake, the family who just lost that love one is flipping the bill for all the food and everything. Everyone else outside of the clan are guest at the funeral, and should eat whatever is available and not complain about the food.

A funeral is not a time to eat the high class food.

Of course the family who is paying for the funeral can decide what they want at or for the funeral, but I just get annoy when I hear people complain about the food, or expect the family to pay for expensive food like shrimps  and endless supply of fruits and snacks.


« Last Edit: January 09, 2012, 10:48:01 PM by IsaacsLove »

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zaubmos

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #1 on: January 09, 2012, 10:49:09 PM »
I do agree...n hiw they complain thqt no one passes around water fruits or munchies  ::)



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inandout

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #2 on: January 09, 2012, 10:50:10 PM »
it/s usually the family that decides whats to be cooked on the second day of the funeral.



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andromeda

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #3 on: January 09, 2012, 10:59:04 PM »
The family has a say in what is cook.  After all, they are the one forking the bill.



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inandout

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #4 on: January 09, 2012, 11:09:34 PM »
issacslove, stop smoking crack!



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Offline Ron Burgundy

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #5 on: January 09, 2012, 11:35:15 PM »
The 24/7 ones for 3 days really take a toll on the living... :-\



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Offline azn-guy

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #6 on: January 09, 2012, 11:39:45 PM »
The 24/7 ones for 3 days really take a toll on the living... :-\
yes it does i remember we had to stay up all night on the last day for the ceremony and had to drive to the burial afterwards, my cousin fell asleep driving and almost crash thank god he didnt



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IsaacsLove

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #7 on: January 10, 2012, 12:09:53 AM »
yes the family has the say as far as what they want to serve at the funeral, the amount of food, and how the funeral is arranged, but when the leader of the clan is running the show, they mind , and people complain etc and it makes the family look bad. Hmong people dont like that, but of course they can do whatever they want.



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morninglory

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #8 on: January 10, 2012, 01:05:50 AM »
At my brother's funeral, we open 3 days straight. It was my request because I never want to put him away. When it happen to someone so very dearest to your heart, you'd understand. We didnt force anyone to stay up with us. On the first night, it was only my family and few relatives. I never understood why people open so long and 24 hours, but I do now why some people do it. I probably got only 3 hours of sleep each night, but it was worth it. I only slept about 2-3 hours the last night, because my heart was aching that he will really be gone forever.

After the funeral, I learned that we killed an extra cow because the person in charge requested, which it was not necessary. He was giving meat to other people.  :-X :-X



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UAKOJ

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #9 on: January 10, 2012, 08:46:49 AM »
YOU have the power to CHANGE!! YOU have the RIGHT to set the hours of the funeral....I beleive 8-12 midnight is enough. Let the people get some rest.
As for food...YOU have the power to set the meal courses.  Anyone who complians, you're NOT welcome.  It's that simple.   



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TusKawg

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #10 on: January 10, 2012, 09:16:10 AM »
Now a day I think go think come about that.
I just want a simple funeral like those Meska Church people.



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MovKuam

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #11 on: January 10, 2012, 09:51:26 AM »
YOU have the power to CHANGE!! YOU have the RIGHT to set the hours of the funeral....I beleive 8-12 midnight is enough. Let the people get some rest.
As for food...YOU have the power to set the meal courses.  Anyone who complians, you're NOT welcome.  It's that simple.   


Actually there's some families had done that and at the end of the night only the deceased family left stay. Yes! they have to closed at might night but paid the fee for 24hr.

Sometime it depends on the how many friends the deceased had made and how much history the deceased left behind. That will determine how much helps, supports, and guests the family will get.



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IsaacsLove

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #12 on: January 10, 2012, 02:56:52 PM »
In the hmong culture, although the family has the say about everything, they have to make sure they don't offend the  clan leader or leaders within their clan, otherwise it is a show of disrespect. Esp if after the husband dies, the wife and children will need to depend on the clan and its leader more etc...or seek support from them. etc.



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Calypso

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #13 on: January 10, 2012, 03:09:42 PM »
I don't like Hmong funerals too. It's hard enough for the family of the deceased person just to deal w/ the grief, but they have to also put on a 24hr, 3 day event. And then all ppl do is come to drink, play cards, flirt, eat, boost their own reputation, make themselves feel important ::)

I don't want that at all for my own funeral b/c I don't want my family to go thru that and pay all the bills. Its very costly. When someone in my husband's family died, all we wanted was to just grieve and have some last moments w/ our deceased loved one. Could hardly do that w/ any kind of meaning.... :(



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PebHmoobUnited

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Re: Dislikes about Hmong funeral
« Reply #14 on: January 10, 2012, 03:17:55 PM »
In the hmong culture, although the family has the say about everything, they have to make sure they don't offend the  clan leader or leaders within their clan, otherwise it is a show of disrespect. Esp if after the husband dies, the wife and children will need to depend on the clan and its leader more etc...or seek support from them. etc.

If i may interject....I've proposed of GETTING RID of the STUPIM CLAN SYSTEM...So you dont have to DEPEND on your clan for anything.....n or serve thier greed!!!!!  Yet peb hmobo tseem RUAM tshaj raum lawm and still want to KEEP HOLDING ON TO this DARK ages' ritual in the 21 century....IDI OT!!!  ::) ::)



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