My Questions

[Lan Xang]

Before I begin my series of questions about Anything relating to Hmong. I want to let everyone knows that my intentions are not to be disrepectful or rude. Just things I may want to know or understand.

Hope everyone is on board and be helpful.

Thanks in advance.


1st question is, I want to know what is the one thing that the family does not bring up or like to talk about it and why?

[Lan Xang]

Well, ok, let me see if I can give an example. Like majority of Lao family we tend to not talk about the abuse or the battery. Domestic issue. Are Hmong family like that?

[Lan Xang]

We are that way as well. Most high class (they make themselves feel that way) Lao family sweep all the family dirty laundry under the rug. To me that is the worse, it only teaches the children to continue the behavior.

[Lan Xang]

How do we teach the children that hitting a woman or hitting the kids out of anger is wrong, and how are we going to stop this if we don't talk about it? Monkey see monkey do. I sure don't want my kid to carry on my bad behaviors, especially when it is wrong.

[Lan Xang]

In Lao family, does the dad hold the authoritative role in dominating the family or is it just based on individual personalities?

Men who are in their 50+ tend to be the authoritative type because it is how they were taught in their upbring from Laos. Younger men, especially 2nd Lao generation abroad has lighten up some. And it is also an individuallity thing.

[Lan Xang]

Thanks guys.

Next question is: Would I be dislike by Hmong men if I fall in love and marry a Hmong woman? It appears that Hmong women are more acceptable to the idea than men?

[C@$H]

Thanks guys.

Next question is: Would I be dislike by Hmong men if I fall in love and marry a Hmong woman? It appears that Hmong women are more acceptable to the idea than men?

family members will embrace you with open arms..however others (people outside of the family/strangers) will criticize the woman.

[Lan Xang]

Thanks. Next question is.

What is the perception of Hmong elders think about Hmong women marrying/dating blacks?

[ice]

I have a question about the Lao culture.  True of false?  When a guy gets married, traditionally he goes and lives with the bride’s family instead of her moving in with his?   

[Lan Xang]

No, got nothing to do with tradition. Sometimes its circumstance. Most traditional guys will have the wife live with his mom, to be her slave. Not for me.

[ice]

Note to self.  Stay away from traditional Lao guys.  Do not want to be anyone’s slave. 

So what are some of the similarities and/or differences between the Hmong culture and the Lao culture?

[Lan Xang]

I don't know much about Hmong culture at all. It's why am here  You can ask me any questions about Lao and I will try my best to reply.

[yajmafia]

No, got nothing to do with tradition. Sometimes its circumstance. Most traditional guys will have the wife live with his mom, to be her slave. Not for me.

Slave?   

[ice]

Do some Lao men have multiple wives? 

Are older Lao men going back to Laos to seek younger wives? 

Do Lao men have to pay a price for his bride? 

[peas_n_queues]

Thanks. Next question is.

What is the perception of Hmong elders think about Hmong women marrying/dating blacks?

I think someone said already.  It doesn't matter the skin color, they don't like it but they learn to accept it.