Signs of depression?

[Evil_K_Man]

So I have a friend who I think is suffering from depression...

Things I've noticed over the past month:

- Hes always tired. Everytime we ask him to go do something with us his answer is "I'm tired"
- Hes been forgetful.  I remember he forgot who Bill Gate was...seriousl y...Bill Gates, who forgets that guy
- He seems withdrawn.  He doesn't join us for poker night anymore and even when we do it at his place (technically his roommate's house), he just stays in his room now, saying...you've guessed it...hes "tired" or sick
- Today, we had a superbowl party and I noticed he didn't greet anybody, he just came out occassionally to watch the game and after the game he just stayed in his room...he said he was working, but not sure because no one checked
- After the game he left the after party and went to the gym by himself and came back when everybody left

So should I be concerned?  Should I wait it out? I know he got promoted recently in his new job, so I'm not sure if its stress, he doesn't sound stress when he talks to us. I'm just concern because hes almost like a completely different person.  So far everybody's too weirded out to talk to him.  Should I ask him if hes depressed?  I've known him for like 5+yrs...but I guess not as personal as I would like.

So what should I do?

[lifemystery]

So I have a friend who I think is suffering from depression...

Things I've noticed over the past month:

- Hes always tired. Everytime we ask him to go do something with us his answer is "I'm tired"
- Hes been forgetful.  I remember he forgot who Bill Gate was...seriousl y...Bill Gates, who forgets that guy
- He seems withdrawn.  He doesn't join us for poker night anymore and even when we do it at his place (technically his roommate's house), he just stays in his room now, saying...you've guessed it...hes "tired" or sick
- Today, we had a superbowl party and I noticed he didn't greet anybody, he just came out occassionally to watch the game and after the game he just stayed in his room...he said he was working, but not sure because no one checked
- After the game he left the after party and went to the gym by himself and came back when everybody left

So should I be concerned?  Should I wait it out? I know he got promoted recently in his new job, so I'm not sure if its stress, he doesn't sound stress when he talks to us. I'm just concern because hes almost like a completely different person.  So far everybody's too weirded out to talk to him.  Should I ask him if hes depressed?  I've known him for like 5+yrs...but I guess not as personal as I would like.

So what should I do?

Maybe it's from the previous relationship he has. Guys don't really like to confront their friends as much as girls. You should give it a try. People are more willing to share their problems if you find a comfortable environment.

[AF-Wife]

So I have a friend who I think is suffering from depression...

Things I've noticed over the past month:

- Hes always tired. Everytime we ask him to go do something with us his answer is "I'm tired"
- Hes been forgetful.  I remember he forgot who Bill Gate was...seriousl y...Bill Gates, who forgets that guy
- He seems withdrawn.  He doesn't join us for poker night anymore and even when we do it at his place (technically his roommate's house), he just stays in his room now, saying...you've guessed it...hes "tired" or sick
- Today, we had a superbowl party and I noticed he didn't greet anybody, he just came out occassionally to watch the game and after the game he just stayed in his room...he said he was working, but not sure because no one checked
- After the game he left the after party and went to the gym by himself and came back when everybody left

So should I be concerned?  Should I wait it out? I know he got promoted recently in his new job, so I'm not sure if its stress, he doesn't sound stress when he talks to us. I'm just concern because hes almost like a completely different person.  So far everybody's too weirded out to talk to him.  Should I ask him if hes depressed?  I've known him for like 5+yrs...but I guess not as personal as I would like.

So what should I do?

He could be stressed or depressed or BOTH!  If you're noticing changes in his behaviors or personality, than talk to him.  Sometime, a person just need someone to be geunine and listen to them.  Than again, he might say everything is okay and just don't push him to tell you how he is feeling.  But at least you made the effort! 

[Lan Xang]

Great advice/comments from both of you   Having a friend there or someone who truly care about you and your well being helps a great deal.

[non dormis]

So what should I do?

you should probably just ask him what's wrong because PH philosophers will probably give you 10 thousand reasons why something is wrong with  him and it wouldn't be the right answer you're looking for.

[yajmafia]

Personally, I think its stress.  I've done all the things you listed when I was stressed.  But I am not a pro.

[Believe_N_Me]

Seek professional advice and not PH!

[yajmafia]

Seek professional advice and not PH!

x2!

[tetrapod]

Yeah the best way is to talk to him about it. 

It could be the job, his health, or depression.

[Lan Xang]

Seek professional advice and not PH!

Asian people are very stubborn, they will find every excuses in the book before they will seek PROFESSIONAL help. But I do agree, don't take no chances it.

[yajmafia]

Asian people are very stubborn, they will find every excuses in the book before they will seek PROFESSIONAL help. But I do agree, don't take no chances it.

True.. but pro help is also very unaffordable.

[Believe_N_Me]

The OP should seek professional advice about his friend.

[Evil_K_Man]

Well, I was wondering if anybody was in that situation before and did they get professional help for their friend? or did they wait it out?

I'm asking because men (especially asian men) don't talk about whats bothering them openly...and I've never had a friend who was this depressed.  Most of the time when my guy friends are depressed, they'll get over it quickly and although their behaviors change, they are still somewhat engaged and reasonable.  The only thing I can think of is his job change.  Hes single (at least to my knowledge) so its not break up related...I think.

[yuknowthat]

he needs to get laid..!

[Evil_K_Man]

True.. but pro help is also very unaffordable.

He works, so I'm guessing he has insurance? or does insurance pay for that kind of thing?