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Author Topic: What to expect at a Christian funeral  (Read 9210 times)

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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #15 on: March 04, 2012, 08:56:40 PM »
As far as the "pe" part of the funeral tradition, it all depends on how extreme the family is about their Christian beliefs.

IMO, I believe the average Hmong Christian doesn't think there's anything wrong with it because it's part of Hmong etiquette. The only reason they stopped doing it is because they're fearful of how the church gatekeepers (the extreme Christians in their congregation) will treat them.  :idiot2: Some people (families) have become so powerful and influential in the church that they practically see themselves as God.  ::)



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Offline megahmong

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #16 on: March 14, 2012, 10:02:33 PM »
I am confused here...dull and lifeless??

do u go to funerals expecting it to be at a club with dubstep music blazing and a DJ spinnin?

its like...moarnin g time...funeral s are supposed to be somewhat of a silent atmoshere.....



I dunno what kind of funerals you go to but the funerals i go to are actually lively, loud chatter, hysterical cryings, people laughing, joking. I actually have fun at funerals cause I get to meet so many relatives I would not have met if i try to find them on my own!



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Offline thehotone

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #17 on: March 15, 2012, 12:10:12 PM »
Thank you all. Came back and learned something new. They open at 8am, speeches started at 10am till 12pm then lunch and then speech again at 4pm and dinner at 6pm. I however did not like the too many songs they have singing up there and no biography spoken of the deceased except for things from the bible. I also do not like how the family thank the church for their love but not the family members and friends who all came. I was also quite surprise to not hear the Pastor speak against non-Christians.  O0

Overall, I do like how the church came to cook and relief the family of that duty though the family did make breakfast and snacks for the guests. It was sad to see everyone leaving after dinner that there wasn't alot of us left to zog hmos till midnight so they told everyone to leave early instead.  There wasn't alot of crying so it was a quite burial too. The pastor said to keep it quite and not cry b/c you'll attracted ghosts instead.  :o

Good thing to know what to expect next time. I was expecting an American receiving and burial but everything is Hmong except there's no qeej and drum.



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Offline thehotone

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #18 on: March 20, 2012, 11:39:17 AM »
Sounds like a typical Christain funeral, except for the Pastor saying no crying b/c you'll attract ghosts.  Mostly Christians don't cry a lot b/c they know that their loved ones went to be with God and that someday they will see each other again in heaven.  Most of the time we cry b/c we miss the deceased or b/c it hit us that we will not see that person again this side of Heaven. 

As for the history on the deceased, ONE of the sermons, either the last one or the second to the last is reserved for that... of course, different people do it differently, but from the funerals that I went to, one is dedicated to talking about the person.

I actually think "hniav" was forbidden by church goers so they cried but it wasn't like crying cry which made the funeral sad to me b/c no one was crying-cry that their loved one has passed. It felt almost like no one was sad this person died. Everybody just pray, sing and bury and that was it. After the burial, in the old tradition, they invite the guests to the house to eat before they leave but in this Christian funeral, everyone went their own way.

Although, I like it for it simpleness but I also didn't like it b/c there were no traditions to follow. I like the qeej and drum and the hais xis on the last night and there was no words of wisdom for the deceased children or grandchildren at this christian funeral.  :( 



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Offline HmongSandal

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #19 on: May 06, 2014, 05:04:19 PM »
Hmm, I also do not know. By reading all the comments, I knew lots of things about a Christian funeral. It's different from a traditional Funeral. I believe there isn't any Saub Kuav, ect.. I think there's nyiaj tshaj ntuj though. Not very sure, because I remember one of my old friend's funeral, people came and gave them money. Considering their Christians. So confusing.  :o



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Phooj Ywg, Nej saib seb. Niag ntsej muag khaus pim nyob tiv.

Offline chidorix0x

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #20 on: June 24, 2014, 04:46:55 PM »
I recently had the pleasure/displeasure of attending a "Hmong-Christian funeral".

What to NOT EXPECT:
Anything remotely traditionally Hmong (except for the attendants of course); and arguably non-Western norms.

What to EXPECT:
A motley of Western influenced practices such as a sermon(s) by the pastor(s), singing the gospels, and prayers on top of prayers.  Oh!  Did I mention singing the gospels to "Hmong musical instrumentals"? ---  LOL!



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Pebhmong. This is a website/forum that many Hmong people go to. This is not a site that any good healthy professional person should mingle in. ... I have never seen more bias and racist Admin and MOD.

Offline chabee

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #21 on: July 28, 2014, 03:38:46 PM »
Can someone light the way for me on what to expect at a Christian funeral? Is there any ka-sue, cua-cha, niam cooking, sho-cuab? (hmong spelling ???) What are my roles as a nyab? Do we cook or do they cater? Who do he give nyiam sunshine too or do we give any at all? Do they zog-hmo? I'm so lost.  :(

I'm CMA and we have all the roles of a traditional funeral, minus txiv xaiv, tshuab qeej, ntaus nruas, hauv qhua, hais xim. None of the old traditional spiritual stuff.

Sunshine money is still collected but it depends on the household to kneel or not. This is where it varies from family to family or church to church. Some families will just say "thank the lord that you're helping donate money for our loss. May God bless you." while some may say "thank you for your donation, may God bless you". I honestly believe that how people say "thank you" doesn't really matter and what matters the most is the "authenticity and genuinety" of it. Before I became a Christian, I was a xyom cuab and there's other xyom cuab(s). The verses we say, they say... may be very deep and long but I gurantee you.... it's a memorized verse which makes it pointless. It's only meaningful if you know what you're saying and doing.
ex of a christian thank you:
ua tsaug os koj tsis ci li es koj tseem qa nyiaj txiaj tuaj pab peb xyom. hnub qab nram ntej, peb paub ua neej ces peb yuav tuaj pab koj li koj pab peb. Yog peb tsis paub ua neej ces, koj tseem pab pab peb los peb yuav pab tsis tau koj tabsi thov kom vajtswv foom koob hmoov rau koj nawb"

There's no zov hmo and it usually ends at about 9pm, after the singing and sermon (usually given by a pastor) daily. The cooking is usually done by the church members (divided into groups for lunch/dinner for the weekend).

As for kneeling, even as a Christian, I will kneel. It's not to say I worship this person but it's a I "respect/honor/thankful" this person for their contribution. People don't give you money because they want you to kneel to them. They give you money because they understand how tragic and hard it is to orchestrate a funeral, as well as how much it costs. We don't know the financials of the family with the loss.

There's no alcohol drinks at Hmong Christian funerals.



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Offline thehotone

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #22 on: August 04, 2014, 09:30:53 AM »
I'm CMA and we have all the roles of a traditional funeral, minus txiv xaiv, tshuab qeej, ntaus nruas, hauv qhua, hais xim. None of the old traditional spiritual stuff.

As for kneeling, even as a Christian, I will kneel. It's not to say I worship this person but it's a I "respect/honor/thankful" this person for their contribution. People don't give you money because they want you to kneel to them. They give you money because they understand how tragic and hard it is to orchestrate a funeral, as well as how much it costs. We don't know the financials of the family with the loss.

There's no alcohol drinks at Hmong Christian funerals.

chabee, you are CMA?! Wow! When I talked to most of people at CMA they tell me they won't bow down to anyone except the Lord even in terms of formality with wedding or funeral.




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Offline chabee

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Re: What to expect at a Christian funeral
« Reply #23 on: August 04, 2014, 02:44:38 PM »
chabee, you are CMA?! Wow! When I talked to most of people at CMA they tell me they won't bow down to anyone except the Lord even in terms of formality with wedding or funeral.

That's a thin line. Some Christians think that bowing or kneeling down is instantly worshipping. You can also kneel due to respect. When I kneel, it's for respect and gratitude.

I won't kneel to a shaman or any person who holds a spiritual title though. That would violate my faith because it's spiritual.



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