Lol! And I’m the opposite, my Korean fiancée’s mom hates me. Why? Because I’m not Korean. It doesn’t matter how she feels about me, it’s how he handle the situation. He used to see his parents every Sunday, and every Sunday she would say horrible things about me. Because his dad is a doctor, his mom thinks I’m after their money. My parents don’t have much, but my dad taught us girls to never depend on a man financially, the best dad ever! I work hard, and will never go after someone’s money. Anyway, it got to the point where fiancee told his mom that he refuse to listen to her put me down and he will not be visiting them anymore unless she stop. It’s been over a year since he last seen his parents. His dad has no say in anything, he does whatever she say or there’s hell to pay.
She did the same to his older brother who is married to a Chinese woman. His older brother has not been in contact with his parents for over 10 years. Just don’t let your mom put your fiancée down, it all comes down to how you handle the situation.
I am not surprised. There is a lot of discrimination amongst Asian groups and especially against groups like the Hmong who are considered an under class.
However, I am not bothered by it at all. It's understandable that parents prefer their children marry within their own ethnic group. This is to continue traditions that preserve the racial group identity.
But at last, I don't think I could ever marry someone if it meant 10 years of not talking to my family or to my husband's. That is just too extreme and not how I want to raise a family. I want it all and if it means breaking up with a non-Hmong or a Hmong whom my parents heavily disapprove of then I would do so. There are just so many fishes in the sea to lose my family over one person.
My family and my ethnic group is still very important to me. I would never even consider dating anybody who wasn't going to fit into this picture, much less marry them.
But then again, I have never had obstacles dating Hmong men who met my criteria for marriage as well as my parents' hope for a son-in-law. Thus, I have never had to look outside the Hmong race to find a successful, educated man who was the best of both worlds: Hmong and westernized.
However, I realize this might not be as easy for my own children. Even with all the opportunities available in this country, I've noticed a wide gap between those who apply themselves vs. those who squander time. I don't want my children to end up with losers who are still living ib pab ib pawg 10-20 years later in their Hmong bubble. My husband and I are much more assimilated than our parents so having a non-Hmong son/daughter-in-law probably won't be that big of a hurdle. I'm more concerned about my children marrying non-conservative/libertarians and atheists than I am about non-Hmong. Of course, I still prefer Hmong but seeing as so many of the younger generation are so indoctrinated by leftism it is rather scary.