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Author Topic: a room of her own  (Read 16442 times)

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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #15 on: September 17, 2014, 08:07:56 PM »
I miss my cousin. When I saw her at my uncle's house, she ran to me and threw her arms around me. Her arms tightened and she didn't let go. When I realized she was crying, it made me cry too. So there we were, two girls crying in each other's arms. It's been about four years since I last saw her. Such a long time but when I think about it, it feels like just yesterday when she lived with us for the summer. When we finally let go of each other, our eyes were red and our cheeks were flushed. We smiled at each other, laughed. We said hello and bonjour and comment ça va, and then she took both my hands in hers and looked at me with concerned eyes. "Lilac," she said, "I heard you were in the hospital. Are you okay?"

Gently I squeezed her hands and assured her I was okay. Just a little pain lingering, and nothing to worry about. Her sweetness and vitality overwhelmed me, and I was struck by how lovely she's grown these past few years. So sweet and gentle, and part of me wanted to protect her under my wing forever.

We spent the whole day together, talking, laughing, taking selfies, and sometimes we just sat together in comfortable silence. I was so happy.

When the hour came for her to leave with her family, she turned to me with tears in her eyes. "I'm going to miss you," she said. I could hear a slight tremble in her voice; it went through me like a sigh.

I gave her a big hug. "I'm just across the ocean," I said. "I'm always here for you."

And we cried again, bittersweet tears that wedged inside my heart. I watched her get into her dad's car, and I gave her a big smile when she looked back at me. The wind dried the tears on my cheeks as I stood at the green gate, waving at them as they left. The last view I had of her was the side of her face as she turned to wave one last goodbye.



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #16 on: September 17, 2014, 09:18:04 PM »



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #17 on: September 17, 2014, 09:39:14 PM »




Lyon--first impressions. Tightly packed apartments and houses. Stucco walls. Red roofs. Earthy colors, dulled by the passage of time. This is a very old city. Narrow streets, some modernized and paved, some cobblestone. Awful toilets. The good parts are good. The bad parts are bad. French people seem the same as everyone else. Driving here is dangerous. Outside the famous cathedral, a French man was playing the accordion. I recognized the tune, something familiar in an unfamiliar place: La Vie en Rose. Digging into my purse, I grabbed a few euros and threw them in his case. He cried out, "Merci, mademoiselle!" as I walked away.



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #18 on: September 17, 2014, 10:27:46 PM »




When we missed our flight the first day, and then had to buy new (and incredibly expensive) tickets for a second flight which was then cancelled due to maintenance issues, I seriously considered cancelling the entire trip. My heart wasn't in it; my spirit was sore. Having so much trouble just trying to get there was like a sign from the universe. I remember crying at the airport because I felt so beaten.

I didn't want to do it anymore. I didn't want to keep my chin up and show a smile to the world, this ducking world that's so terrible and frightening while simultaneously also beautiful. And I remember thinking that I wanted to go home and sleep. Part of me was so tired of life, tired of accepting people's abandonment, tired of the constant wave and flow of love and hate and madness. I didn't care about anything except the void in my center where I once stood with so much bright hope.

But I worked things out with the airline and we left on the third day. Straight flight right to Paris. As the plane lifted off the tarmac, I couldn't stop weeping. There was the inexorable feeling that I was leaving him behind, and I didn't want to. Part of me wanted to carry him with me. What did it matter though? He had already let go, he was gone. The place where our worlds had so briefly collided no longer existed.

The clouds were beautiful up in the sky. So quiet and serene. The buzz of the mad world below me faded away, and it was just me and those clouds, and I remembered once upon a time, he had asked me what I wanted to be most in this world. I told him, "I want to be a cloud, and float away so that I can be alone."

Well, I got my wish. I was floating among the clouds, and I was alone.


« Last Edit: September 17, 2014, 10:54:50 PM by Lilac »

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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #19 on: September 23, 2014, 04:33:58 PM »
 
 



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J-a-s-o-n

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #20 on: September 25, 2014, 01:05:01 PM »
NINJA VANISH!!!


« Last Edit: September 26, 2014, 08:00:15 PM by J-a-s-o-n »

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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #21 on: September 25, 2014, 01:45:21 PM »


Something to cheer you up.  ;D

I can't view this on my phone so I'll watch it when I get home.

Hey koj puas tau pom my thread on what I think a c-walk actually is? I pondered it for days.  ;D



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J-a-s-o-n

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #22 on: September 25, 2014, 02:29:48 PM »
I can't view this on my phone so I'll watch it when I get home.

Hey koj puas tau pom my thread on what I think a c-walk actually is? I pondered it for days.  ;D

OK,

I haven't seen your thread on c-walk.  You actually thought about it for days?   Silly yo.  :2funny:  What about stacking?  :P



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #23 on: September 25, 2014, 03:34:51 PM »
OK,

I haven't seen your thread on c-walk.  You actually thought about it for days?   Silly yo.  :2funny:  What about stacking?  :P

Here ya go!

http://www.pebhmong.com/forum/index.php/topic,361633.0.html

Stacking ey.... LOL. I'll draw it later and post it tonight.  :D



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #24 on: September 26, 2014, 12:46:20 AM »


Something to cheer you up.  ;D

oh wow. muaj peev xwm kawg os, koj na. it looked like you got really close to the fire... did you feel the heat on your legs when you jumped over?



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #25 on: September 26, 2014, 12:54:55 AM »
Here's a video of me teaching my nephew all the hobbit names. I got Dori and Ori mixed up... darn.






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J-a-s-o-n

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #26 on: September 26, 2014, 07:20:51 AM »
oh wow. muaj peev xwm kawg os, koj na. it looked like you got really close to the fire... did you feel the heat on your legs when you jumped over?

Not my legs but on my worm.  :P



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #27 on: September 26, 2014, 03:58:46 PM »
Not my legs but on my worm.  :P

LOL

Ceev faj nawb!  ;D



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SamyElisabeth

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #28 on: September 26, 2014, 04:42:36 PM »
She had a large, dark birthmark right under her eye. It was as if someone had taken a piece of charcoal and crumbled it down the left side of her face. That was the first thing I noticed about her.

The second: I thought she was beautiful.

It wasn't just the physicality of her person but also her attitude. The way she spoke, her easy laugh, and her direct gaze. It turned me into a stuttering fool. But only because I liked her instantly.

After she left, I spent days thinking about her. How nervous I felt around her, how nice it was to talk to her. It wasn't a sensual desire but more like a desire for company in this lonely cage I've built. She had reached something inside of me, and I felt something click. A latch pulled loose. Rusty gears swinging back into motion. Sunlight dappling the green, green grass. Her eyes were hazel bordering on green, and she wore her birthmark without shame or pity, and all I could remember was how beautiful she was, standing there while I answered her questions and felt so foolish. 



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J-a-s-o-n

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Re: a room of her own
« Reply #29 on: September 26, 2014, 07:59:30 PM »
LOL

Ceev faj nawb!  ;D

Liquid courage and bets are to blame.  :D



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