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Author Topic: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal  (Read 29392 times)

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Offline Reporter

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #30 on: April 07, 2015, 10:01:55 PM »
Here's a clue:  What currency would $3,500.00 be?

I've heard some say they were married in the old country, are there any truth to that? or were they married in the states?



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Stybic_Kemaka

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #31 on: April 07, 2015, 10:46:44 PM »
Everyone so smarty n Americanize but yet only swings back around Hmong men/women.  Heck if I tuff like u guy I bang black/mex/white n forget sticky/stinky uncivilize Hmong ... Like u all mention n hate so much...

I guess most just like to talk shiit bout fire from afar ...  O0



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AOZ

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #32 on: April 10, 2015, 04:12:15 PM »
the problem is not bride price nor tradition.  the problem is.... domestic violence... and respecting each other's space after you've divorced....wh y was she even at HIS house?  who knows?

but in regards to her being married at 12 years old.... i recall in 1993... many hmong girls whom were 12-15....they were the reasons they married guys over 21.... they ran away with their husbands because they were head over heals for those older guys.... they were not FORCED to marry these older men at that time.... it was THEIR decisions....  against the wills of their parents...from what i've witness... some of these same girls.... once they reach 21+ they realized... oh they want to partay and not be a mother... so they blame it on their husbands and parents and traditions for taking advantage of their innocence... even though it was them whom said they'd die if their parents don't allow to marry their older husbands.... 

stop blaming traditions and parents.   ::)



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SumTingWong

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #33 on: April 10, 2015, 06:01:52 PM »
the problem is not bride price nor tradition.  the problem is.... domestic violence... and respecting each other's space after you've divorced....wh y was she even at HIS house?  who knows?

but in regards to her being married at 12 years old.... i recall in 1993... many hmong girls whom were 12-15....they were the reasons they married guys over 21.... they ran away with their husbands because they were head over heals for those older guys.... they were not FORCED to marry these older men at that time.... it was THEIR decisions....  against the wills of their parents...from what i've witness... some of these same girls.... once they reach 21+ they realized... oh they want to partay and not be a mother... so they blame it on their husbands and parents and traditions for taking advantage of their innocence... even though it was them whom said they'd die if their parents don't allow to marry their older husbands.... 

stop blaming traditions and parents.   ::)

I would humbly disagree... it has everything to do with tradition and brideprice is part of that tradition. You, yourself just said in 1993, many girls ages 12-15 were married. SO, how can you say that is not traditional? In this society and in state, CAlIFORNIA, You must be of 18 years old to marry... there are other minor requirements, but 18 is the main one. So how can a 12-15 year old girl marry in the eyes of the law? The answer is, it was a cultural and traditional Hmong wedding only. The Brideprice comes into play because it is a traditional wedding and when the husband is resentful for paying it.

In this case, the girl went to the courts and asked the court to impose child support and maybe even spousal support on the man. The property in dispute was also to be sold so any profits can be divided. The man refuse, saying it was his home and he purchased with his money. When you put a man up against the wall... what do you think will happen??? When he has no outlet, and in his eyes, no other option. Well, I guess we can all see the result now? Right?

Everyone is at fault here, in my opinion.
1. The parents are at fault for allowing this to happen. Yes, she is a minor at the time. And as such, the parents have control of what a minor does, no matter what her wishes are.
2. The husband is at fault for being abusive and selfish.
3.  The wife is at fault. She knew her husband was abusive yet stay. In her last days, she wanted him to pay and the only way to hurt him was to make him sale his home. Should and could have been more civil.






« Last Edit: April 10, 2015, 06:04:14 PM by SumTingWong »

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Sydney

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #34 on: April 10, 2015, 06:09:11 PM »
I would humbly disagree... it has everything to do with tradition and brideprice is part of that tradition. You, yourself just said in 1993, many girls ages 12-15 were married. SO, how can you say that is not traditional? In this society and in state, CAlIFORNIA, You must be of 18 years old to marry... there are other minor requirements, but 18 is the main one. So how can a 12-15 year old girl marry in the eyes of the law? The answer is, it was a cultural and traditional Hmong wedding only. The Brideprice comes into play because it is a traditional wedding and when the husband is resentful for paying it.

In this case, the girl went to the courts and asked the court to impose child support and maybe even spousal support on the man. The property in dispute was also to be sold so any profits can be divided. The man refuse, saying it was his home and he purchased with his money. When you put a man up against the wall... what do you think will happen??? When he has no outlet, and in his eyes, no other option. Well, I guess we can all see the result now? Right?

Everyone is at fault here, in my opinion.
1. The parents are at fault for allowing this to happen. Yes, she is a minor at the time. And as such, the parents have control of what a minor does, no matter what her wishes are.
2. The husband is at fault for being abusive and selfish.
3.  The wife is at fault. She knew her husband was abusive yet stay. In her last days, she wanted him to pay and the only way to hurt him was to make him sale his home. Should and could have been more civil.

Very well explained.  I totally agree with the viewpoints.   



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Sydney

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #35 on: April 10, 2015, 06:31:15 PM »
the problem is not bride price nor tradition.  the problem is.... domestic violence... and respecting each other's space after you've divorced....wh y was she even at HIS house?  who knows?

but in regards to her being married at 12 years old.... i recall in 1993... many hmong girls whom were 12-15....they were the reasons they married guys over 21.... they ran away with their husbands because they were head over heals for those older guys.... they were not FORCED to marry these older men at that time.... it was THEIR decisions....  against the wills of their parents...from what i've witness... some of these same girls.... once they reach 21+ they realized... oh they want to partay and not be a mother... so they blame it on their husbands and parents and traditions for taking advantage of their innocence... even though it was them whom said they'd die if their parents don't allow to marry their older husbands.... 

stop blaming traditions and parents.   ::)

It almost seems as the husband, parents and traditions all succumbed to the desire/whine of a 12 year old?

I don't think its fair for anyone to say that a 12 year old can make sound decision at that age.  Even if she was dying to get married, the parents are the ones with principles, not the child. 



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ok-fine-version2

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #36 on: April 10, 2015, 06:36:20 PM »
Let's just stop blaming this and that. All you guys need to ask yourself is if, in this situation, killing another human being is absolutely necessary. Of course it isn't. The end.



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sweetvoice

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #37 on: April 10, 2015, 09:49:01 PM »
My opinion about the whole situation is that even if the dead female did agreed to be married to a man who was 21 years old her parents should never agreed or approved to it since she was only 12 years. The parents should of reported the guy as a child molester.   Anyway, the dead female's marriage with the her child molester husband was wrong but  she choose not to take action to put him away in prison in her thirties.  It is very sad to see that the dead woman never got the true answer on why her parents was supporting the idea of allowing a 21 man to sleep with her.   I honestly believe that not ALL female know or will admit in their life that it is not okay for a 21 years old man to be sleeping with a 12 years old girl.



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sweetvoice

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #38 on: April 10, 2015, 09:54:33 PM »
Just think deep.......how many of you would allow a 21 years old man to be married and sleep with your daughter at age 12



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Offline VillainousHero

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #39 on: April 11, 2015, 01:57:13 AM »
It almost seems as the husband, parents and traditions all succumbed to the desire/whine of a 12 year old?

I don't think its fair for anyone to say that a 12 year old can make sound decision at that age.  Even if she was dying to get married, the parents are the ones with principles, not the child.

Perhaps...she could've been the more educated then her own parents.  She could've been more aware of her situation.  I didn't see her making any big deal of losing her virginity...so we can guess whatever logic to that, if any logical thinking is to be applied. I didn't see her making any big deal of being against the decision of being sold either.  They could've been Romeo and Juliette for all we know.

Maybe her new husband is worse and them two Ex's just wanted to make a blood oath to the underworld?  Too convenient how one has perfect knowledge of the workplace and bee line straight to a murder-suicide scenario.

Things that we will never know...

the problem is not bride price nor tradition.  the problem is.... domestic violence... and respecting each other's space after you've divorced....wh y was she even at HIS house?  who knows?

but in regards to her being married at 12 years old.... i recall in 1993... many hmong girls whom were 12-15....they were the reasons they married guys over 21.... they ran away with their husbands because they were head over heals for those older guys.... they were not FORCED to marry these older men at that time.... it was THEIR decisions....  against the wills of their parents...from what i've witness... some of these same girls.... once they reach 21+ they realized... oh they want to partay and not be a mother... so they blame it on their husbands and parents and traditions for taking advantage of their innocence... even though it was them whom said they'd die if their parents don't allow to marry their older husbands.... 

stop blaming traditions and parents.   ::)

Romeo and Juliet complex...plus gangsta rebel pop culture...and YOLO lifestyles.

Just never know what people base their decisions on...



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Offline VillainousHero

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #40 on: April 11, 2015, 01:59:51 AM »
Just think deep.......how many of you would allow a 21 years old man to be married and sleep with your daughter at age 12

The thinking is: marry young die young...where people only live up to 40-50 yrs old...



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The real villain is looking at you.  The last hero was just not true.  If everything works out in the end.  It's because all things make amends.

Offline VillainousHero

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #41 on: April 11, 2015, 02:06:15 AM »
Let's just stop blaming this and that. All you guys need to ask yourself is if, in this situation, killing another human being is absolutely necessary. Of course it isn't. The end.

For love, for self-preservation, for hate, for justice, etc.,...

...not everyone can de-nature human nature...



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The real villain is looking at you.  The last hero was just not true.  If everything works out in the end.  It's because all things make amends.

AOZ

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #42 on: April 11, 2015, 09:26:14 AM »
I would humbly disagree... it has everything to do with tradition and brideprice is part of that tradition. You, yourself just said in 1993, many girls ages 12-15 were married. SO, how can you say that is not traditional? In this society and in state, CAlIFORNIA, You must be of 18 years old to marry... there are other minor requirements, but 18 is the main one. So how can a 12-15 year old girl marry in the eyes of the law? The answer is, it was a cultural and traditional Hmong wedding only. The Brideprice comes into play because it is a traditional wedding and when the husband is resentful for paying it.

In this case, the girl went to the courts and asked the court to impose child support and maybe even spousal support on the man. The property in dispute was also to be sold so any profits can be divided. The man refuse, saying it was his home and he purchased with his money. When you put a man up against the wall... what do you think will happen??? When he has no outlet, and in his eyes, no other option. Well, I guess we can all see the result now? Right?

Everyone is at fault here, in my opinion.
1. The parents are at fault for allowing this to happen. Yes, she is a minor at the time. And as such, the parents have control of what a minor does, no matter what her wishes are.
2. The husband is at fault for being abusive and selfish.
3.  The wife is at fault. She knew her husband was abusive yet stay. In her last days, she wanted him to pay and the only way to hurt him was to make him sale his home. Should and could have been more civil.

Putting the blame on tradition and parents is nothing but an excuse.  What an excuse to make our traditions parents the bad guys....  ::)  our traditions have always been ever so changing to environments and times....

I grew up with such girls.... and these girls are the ones who let themselves make these major decisions when they are 12-15 years old.  What are parents to do?   What would you do if your 12 year run off or elope to be with her 21 year old BF or  live with him?  Would you call the cops on her and send her to live in Foster home?  Send her to juvie?  What if she'd threatened to kill herself in front of you?  Would you send her to a mental home to be medicated?  Not all but most of the girls who do marry early are emotionally unstable.... always blaming others for their bad decisions... sure.. perhaps parents should have sent these girls to mental homes... to be medicated to save them from making bad decisions.... perhaps...

bottom line is.... if you want out of your marriage... leave on good terms and stop instigating... move far away and leave other person alone so s/he can heal... don't need to hurt them by bankrupting him/her....


« Last Edit: April 11, 2015, 09:28:26 AM by AOZ »

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Sydney

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #43 on: April 11, 2015, 09:28:36 AM »
Perhaps...she could've been the more educated then her own parents.  She could've been more aware of her situation.  I didn't see her making any big deal of losing her virginity...so we can guess whatever logic to that, if any logical thinking is to be applied. I didn't see her making any big deal of being against the decision of being sold either.  They could've been Romeo and Juliette for all we know.

Maybe her new husband is worse and them two Ex's just wanted to make a blood oath to the underworld?  Too convenient how one has perfect knowledge of the workplace and bee line straight to a murder-suicide scenario.

Things that we will never know...

Romeo and Juliet complex...plus gangsta rebel pop culture...and YOLO lifestyles.

Just never know what people base their decisions on...

You make quite the assumption there with all unproven speculations.  From your perspective, if the horse is dead, instead of diagnosing the problem, you say its safe to speculate that the horse could have spoken up or done something differently at 12 years old? 

I don't know man.  If a child could make decision at 12 years old, why couldn't a child vote already?  Its alright to make speculations, but it is not alright to use speculation to shroud up a murder case connecting to traditional practice.  You have to put all facts on the table or all bets are off. 

There is a rumor that the Feds are investigating into this type of child bride within the Hmong.  I hope that if we are only making speculations, we don't build ourselves into a corner with unproven speculations. 



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Sydney

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Re: Fresno police release more details about murder-suicide in fresno cal
« Reply #44 on: April 11, 2015, 09:41:09 AM »
Putting the blame on tradition and parents is nothing but an excuse.  What an excuse to make our traditions parents the bad guys....  ::)  our traditions have always been ever so changing to environments and times....

I grew up with such girls.... and these girls are the ones who let themselves make these major decisions when they are 12-15 years old.  What are parents to do?   What would you do if your 12 year run off or elope to be with her 21 year old BF or  live with him?  Would you call the cops on her and send her to live in Foster home?  Send her to juvie?  What if she'd threatened to kill herself in front of you?  Would you send her to a mental home to be medicated?  Not all but most of the girls who do marry early are emotionally unstable.... always blaming others for their bad decisions... sure.. perhaps parents should have sent these girls to mental homes... to be medicated to save them from making bad decisions.... perhaps...

bottom line is.... if you want out of your marriage... leave on good terms and stop instigating... move far away and leave other person alone so s/he can heal... don't need to hurt them by bankrupting him/her....

Yes, call the cops, send her to juvie, send her to a mental home, or do something about it.   If the parents don't protest, no matter how many years later, if there are problems occurring, the problem will always be connected to the parents.  It doesn't matter how you look at it, this case is big time connecting to the parents. 

Try explaining to the feds/court once they are subpoena to stand trial for violating the laws.



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