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Author Topic: penny for your thoughts  (Read 7590 times)

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Offline theking

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #15 on: June 24, 2015, 06:02:43 PM »
as a parent, i will do everything and anything in my power to lead the cow to the river, but certainly i will NOT make it drink if it does not want. every parent want the best for their daughter to have a successful life, not necessary a happy one.  those who started life happily almost are NOT happy soon after the fact along the process.

That's not accurate as I've dealt with parents that don't care about their kids (son/daughter) having worked in the social services field.

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if i was the boy, i would have accept the fact, ...

Me too but only if my girl also agrees with her parents. If she still wants to go through with it, I will continue the process with her because it's our lives, not her parents.



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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #16 on: June 24, 2015, 11:56:03 PM »
I mean really?  You're going to kill yourself over what one or two people say?

There is no need young folks!

You can still get married if the parents say no.   

I'll never understand it. 

If parents say no, you can still do it.

My thoughts exactly! Of course it matters to parents who their children marry. People with standards care about these things and obviously the girl has standards because she listened to her parents. Their opinion must be important to her and rightly so.

Maybe the guy should've courted a girl who didn't have standards. But he probably wouldn't have been attracted to her because she doesn't have standards. Xav tau luag tus neeg zoo tabsis yus ho twb this yog ib tug neeg zoo.  :idiot2:

Only those with no standards are okay with pretty much anything, until it doesn't work in their favor then all hell breaks loose.



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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #17 on: June 25, 2015, 12:07:17 AM »
Only a desperate person who can't find another relationship would enter the marriage after knowing how much the inlaws hate his/her guts. I wouldn't marry a man even if he wanted to, knowing that his parents heavily disapprove of our relationship. They can't pay enough for my bride token for me to say "I do".



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Renaissance

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #18 on: June 25, 2015, 02:45:13 PM »
You don't hear a lot of these cases because of the laws here in the US which allows 2 consenting adults to get married.  My thought is, maybe his girlfriend did not actually love him enough to marry him.  Led him on and lied to him that her parents did not allow her to marry him.  IF she loved him enough, I think she would most likely run off with him.



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Offline theking

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #19 on: June 25, 2015, 02:56:11 PM »
You don't hear a lot of these cases because of the laws here in the US which allows 2 consenting adults to get married.  My thought is, maybe his girlfriend did not actually love him enough to marry him.  Led him on and lied to him that her parents did not allow her to marry him.  IF she loved him enough, I think she would most likely run off with him.

Yup, if she's an adult and consent, nothing her parents can do about it...



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Offline theking

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #20 on: June 25, 2015, 03:00:00 PM »
Per the cases in Laos and Thailand, the girl did as her parents' wished by going through with the marriage with a guy she doesn't love but it was just too difficult to be in an unhappy marriage so she took herself out of her misery instead...



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Renaissance

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #21 on: June 25, 2015, 03:01:33 PM »
Yup, if she's an adult and consent, nothing her parents can do about it...

Yes, which leads me to believe that he was played by her.

Back in Laos, there are incidences where the parents did not allow the marriage.  What happened is BOTH the boyfriend AND girlfriend committed suicide, not just one, to show their undying love for one another.



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Offline theking

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #22 on: June 25, 2015, 03:32:09 PM »
Yes, which leads me to believe that he was played by her.

Back in Laos, there are incidences where the parents did not allow the marriage.  What happened is BOTH the boyfriend AND girlfriend committed suicide, not just one, to show their undying love for one another.

Some cases are similar to "Romeo & Juliet"...



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LION HEART

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #23 on: June 25, 2015, 03:48:22 PM »
This case wasn't Romeo and Juliet though; it was Romeo Must Die.   8)



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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: penny for your thoughts
« Reply #24 on: June 25, 2015, 04:02:35 PM »
You don't hear a lot of these cases because of the laws here in the US which allows 2 consenting adults to get married.  My thought is, maybe his girlfriend did not actually love him enough to marry him.  Led him on and lied to him that her parents did not allow her to marry him.  IF she loved him enough, I think she would most likely run off with him.

It's clear the girl didn't have any clear intentions of marrying the guy, or maybe she finally came to her senses and realized it would be a mistake.

In Laos, the only girls who end up marrying a man they don't love is because they don't have a boyfriend waiting on the side OR because the side boyfriend qeeb siab (we know what that means  ::)). Even in Laos, girls who have a boyfriend do not wait for their parents approval. They simply elope with the man of their choice. This is not a case between Laos and USA.

There are very few parents who force their daughter to marry just so they can make a few quick bucks. Many times the parents yeej pom tias tus vauv yog neeg zoo and that their daughter is not going to get a better offer. Conditions are harsh for unmarried women who live as old spinsters. In addition, I hardly call it "force" when bf/gf ua rau tej laus rhuav phlu so parents are compelled to marry them.   



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