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Author Topic: Lilly's Journal  (Read 2316 times)

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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #45 on: June 05, 2019, 05:31:52 PM »
...


« Last Edit: June 10, 2019, 07:41:21 PM by lilly »

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Offline VillainousHero

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #46 on: June 06, 2019, 03:22:54 PM »
As promised



There were only three other blooms so far...It's very sparse this year.



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The real villain is looking at you.  The last hero was just not true.  If everything works out in the end.  It's because all things make amends.

Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #47 on: June 10, 2019, 11:46:05 AM »
Very nice flowers, VillainousHero!  Thanks for sharing the pic.



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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #48 on: June 10, 2019, 11:58:47 AM »
It took me 20 years to finally say goodbye.  So many years!  I get a little angry at myself and sad when I think about all the time that I wasted that I can't get back.   :'(

I guess what I've learned in my past relationship is that... we each take our own time to process relationships, and we each decide when to end unhappy relationships at different times.  People tell me I should have ended my previous relationship sooner, but I wasn't ready to end it at those earlier times.  I ended it when I was ready to end it.  What I also learned is that you should trust your instincts about a person because your instincts are usually right.  When someone isn't good for you, you'll know it and you'll feel it earlier on... you should always trust your gut.  I just wish I hadn't wasted so many years.  I was such a hopeful person though, and I'm someone that never gives up on others easily.  It took so many years to realize that as hard as it is to let go, it is much better to let go of the people that do not bring you happiness and joy.  Life is much too short and going forward, I will not waste it on people that do not deserve me anymore.


« Last Edit: June 11, 2019, 07:19:48 PM by lilly »

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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #49 on: June 11, 2019, 06:53:28 PM »
To CT:
I love you, more than you will ever understand.
I have so much love in my heart for you... it seeps everywhere for you! 
But I know that you and I, we can never be more than friends.   
You'll never be able to step into my embrace,
You'll never be able to hold my hands.

My darling, my love for you will live on, long after I am gone,
My love will linger on like love songs,
You'll hear my love in the songs of birds,
You'll see my love when you look at sunsets and sunrises,
You'll feel my love when you look upon a perfect blue sky,
The world may crumble and fall but, my darling, my love will never die.



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Offline anonymouse

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #50 on: June 12, 2019, 12:56:32 AM »
It took me 20 years to finally say goodbye.  So many years!  I get a little angry at myself and sad when I think about all the time that I wasted that I can't get back.   :'(

I guess what I've learned in my past relationship is that... we each take our own time to process relationships, and we each decide when to end unhappy relationships at different times.  People tell me I should have ended my previous relationship sooner, but I wasn't ready to end it at those earlier times.  I ended it when I was ready to end it.  What I also learned is that you should trust your instincts about a person because your instincts are usually right.  When someone isn't good for you, you'll know it and you'll feel it earlier on... you should always trust your gut.  I just wish I hadn't wasted so many years.  I was such a hopeful person though, and I'm someone that never gives up on others easily.  It took so many years to realize that as hard as it is to let go, it is much better to let go of the people that do not bring you happiness and joy.  Life is much too short and going forward, I will not waste it on people that do not deserve me anymore.

Although there's nothing you can do to get that time back, you can learn to make amends, learn from it, grow, and look forward to the future.  Each day that you breathe is another day, another chance to do something you wish you had done in the past.

I would recommend you write letters at this current time to your past self, and one to your future self.  Come back in a few years, reread and rewrite the letters and see a difference.

It's always easier said than done, and it's always easier to say something when you're on the outside looking in.  When you're on the inside, there's more to it.  There's feelings, there's history, there's a bond, there's a connection.  It takes time for different people to get over things.  For some, they move on the moment they leave the house.  The moment they find someone new, or the moment the tears stop flowing.  For other's it takes years and years.  For some it never truly goes away.  They say Time heals all wounds.  It really doesn't.  Time makes it easier for you to cope with the wound and live your life, but it doesn't heal. 

Don't lose hope. Don't let this person or persons cause you to lose hope.  Don't let their negative energy affect your way of life, don't let it become the poison.  Keep being you.  Keep being hopeful.  Keep giving chances.  Keep growing.  Don't let that person be in control your life. 

Take a deep breath.  enjoy your days.  Message me if you need to discuss this more personally. :)



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Try to change the things you cannot accept.

Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #51 on: June 12, 2019, 01:58:15 PM »
Although there's nothing you can do to get that time back, you can learn to make amends, learn from it, grow, and look forward to the future.  Each day that you breathe is another day, another chance to do something you wish you had done in the past.

I would recommend you write letters at this current time to your past self, and one to your future self.  Come back in a few years, reread and rewrite the letters and see a difference.

It's always easier said than done, and it's always easier to say something when you're on the outside looking in.  When you're on the inside, there's more to it.  There's feelings, there's history, there's a bond, there's a connection.  It takes time for different people to get over things.  For some, they move on the moment they leave the house.  The moment they find someone new, or the moment the tears stop flowing.  For other's it takes years and years.  For some it never truly goes away.  They say Time heals all wounds.  It really doesn't.  Time makes it easier for you to cope with the wound and live your life, but it doesn't heal. 

Don't lose hope. Don't let this person or persons cause you to lose hope.  Don't let their negative energy affect your way of life, don't let it become the poison.  Keep being you.  Keep being hopeful.  Keep giving chances.  Keep growing.  Don't let that person be in control your life. 

Take a deep breath.  enjoy your days.  Message me if you need to discuss this more personally. :)

Thank you so much for your encouraging, thoughtful, and caring words, Anonymouse.  I really appreciate it.


« Last Edit: June 12, 2019, 06:18:25 PM by lilly »

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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #52 on: June 12, 2019, 02:33:23 PM »


This picture explains my love life.


« Last Edit: June 12, 2019, 06:19:28 PM by lilly »

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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #53 on: June 12, 2019, 02:59:23 PM »



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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #54 on: June 12, 2019, 03:33:26 PM »
More flowers have bloomed at my house.










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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #55 on: June 12, 2019, 08:44:09 PM »
I love you so much, Mcdreamy,
Everywhere I look you're all I see,
You're in the breeze, you're in the trees,
You're in my thoughts, you're in my memory.

Every waking hour I feel you next to me,
You warm my heart and give me joy,
Thoughts of you always bring me peace,
I wish you could see how my heart beats,
You're with me even in my sleep!

You're all I think about and all I dream of,
Do you miss me like I miss you,
Do you love me as much as I love you?

I'll always be your Charlotte,
You'll always be my Wilbur,
When life gets too hard and you need a friend,
Remember that I'll be here for you until the very end.

Be always terrific, radiant, and brave,
I'm your biggest cheerleader,
I'm your biggest fan,
I love you so much, I hope you see, 
That our love was meant to be.

Even though you're there and I'm here,
Even though I'm living my life and you're living yours,
Our love will live on forevermore.



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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #56 on: June 12, 2019, 09:52:26 PM »
Why does my heart feel so bad?
https://youtu.be/o1Xsj9-3Pvo



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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #57 on: June 12, 2019, 10:13:52 PM »
Omg, I need to stop listening to depressing songs.  But when you're depressed all you want to listen to is depressing songs! 

How do you let go of someone you love with all of your heart?  How do you stop loving your soulmate?  How do you stop thinking about this person when they are in every fiber of your being?  When every day for months you've lived and breathed this person for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, how do you then all of a sudden force yourself to act like this person no longer exists and force yourself to move on from this person?  How do you cut this person out of your heart and pretend they don't mean anything to you anymore?  How do you stop feeling things for this person?  Eff!  I have a migraine!  I have a headache.  My heart is bleeding.  This is too much for me.  I never want to love anyone this much ever again.  Leave me alone, stupid love.  I don't need you ever again, because you hurt me too much.



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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #58 on: June 12, 2019, 10:23:06 PM »
If love hurts this much, why is everyone searching for love?  I don't get ittt!  I'm never loving anyone ever again.   :'( :'( :'(



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Offline lilly

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Re: Lilly's Journal
« Reply #59 on: June 12, 2019, 10:25:51 PM »
The first and the last person I'll ever love this much is this Mcdreamy person.   >:(



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