Bars and Club After Marriage?

[Dok_Champa]

It is "narrow minded" when you only see it as bad or wrong even though factual evidence says it can be good too depending on the individual...

"realistic" is not all things that happen at the clubs is bad or wrong, not all people that go to the clubs go there to cheat on their spouse, nothing wrong with anyone that is of age to go to the clubs regardless of their marital status, and the purpose/reason to go to the club varies ...

And if they chose to "misunderstood" without facts then it's on them..What "risk"? If your self-esteem is so low and insecurity is that bad that you feel like it's a "risk" when people pass false judgment about you then might as well stop living..And those rumors just doesn't happen the clubs as I've seen happen at Hmong New Years.

Since being "online" is ranked higher than the clubs for married people to cheat, do I care if another person falsely assume I'm cheating just because I'm online"? NOPE!!!

Even you will misunderstand if you keep running into your married relative(s) at the club.  If you don't, you're one of the exceptions but others will misunderstand.  Don't believe me, try it.  Someone will eventually come up to you and say, "brother, how come I see you here often..is your home ok ahhahaahaha?" Apply these to other areas too... Let's say your family has a gathering...an d you don't show up.  They will start calling to find out what's going on...  It's being realistic.. when you put yourself in a situation for people to misunderstand, they will.  Risk is... be prepare to deal with any misunderstandi ng coming your way.  You can't blame people for being narrow minded.. when you have to realize the consequences of your actions.  I'm not saying don't do it.. but people need to decide when to compromise.  Some things you can compromise and some things you can't and that depends on people. 

[theking]

Including yourself, how many women do you know of who frequents bars and are  still on their first marriage?   

Next time you're in Vegas or even the Bay Area or LA, visit the clubs there, I bet you couldn't count all the married women patrons at those establishments with all of your fingers and toes..

[theking]

Even you will misunderstand if you keep running into your married relative(s) at the club.  If you don't, you're one of the exceptions but others will misunderstand.  Don't believe me, try it.  Someone will eventually come up to you and say, "brother, how come I see you here often..is your home ok ahhahaahaha?" Apply these to other areas too... Let's say your family has a gathering...an d you don't show up.  They will start calling to find out what's going on...  It's being realistic.. when you put yourself in a situation for people to misunderstand, they will.  Risk is... be prepare to deal with any misunderstandi ng coming your way.  You can't blame people for being narrow minded.. when you have to realize the consequences of your actions.  I'm not saying don't do it.. but people need to decide when to compromise.  Some things you can compromise and some things you can't and that depends on people.

Nope not me because I get the facts first instead of just jumping in assuming this or that. And no, I'm not an exception...Ma ny people also like to get the facts first vs. just falsely assuming this or that..

If someone actually approach me, I will answer their question truthfully.  Then I'll ask them why they think there's something wrong at "home" and educate them not to falsely assume but instead to fact check first..

There is no consequences for one's action to go to the club because there's nothing illegal about it. That's like someone saw you online and he/she just assume that you're cheating on your spouse because "Online" is where a lot of married people do the cheating...It ranked second only to work..based on what I saw.

Speaking of work, since it's the most common place for married people to cheat, are you gonna stop going working because you don't want to "risk" other assuming this or that?

[YAX]

Next time you're in Vegas or even the Bay Area or LA, visit the clubs there, I bet you couldn't count all the married women patrons at those establishments with all of your fingers and toes..

Some areas of this world are better left unvisited. 

[theking]

Some areas of this world are better left unvisited. 

That's exactly my point. If it's not your thing and/or you don't know much about it, going around falsely assuming this or that is not very smart..

That's as smart as White people falsely assuming all Hmong people are bad because one Vang dude shot a cop yesterday in WI...

[YAX]

That's exactly my point. If it's not your thing and/or you don't know much about it, going around falsely assuming this or that is not very smart..

That's as smart as White people falsely assuming all Hmong people are bad because one Vang dude shot a cop yesterday in WI...

I see.  So you claim to be an expert with club scenes yet you haven't seen marriages broken by it?

[Dok_Champa]

Like the old saying, "Pom dej dag (see yellow river),  siab nqig (liver go down)".. Or in other words, "seeing is believing"...

Some people have to experience it first hand to know, to see, to believe, to understand..  Talking about it might not work.

I admit, certain things in life, I will go down the yellow river in order for liver to go down or I call it going to the moon.. even when I know the world and everyone will call me out for it... still..I'd go if I strongly believe in them.

[luvelifefaith]

ANY married men or women who goes to the club or to any dance party environment without their spouse is looking to hook up. No exceptions!!

This is NOT a narrow minded person's perceptions but the general perceptions.
If you are married you want to go out and dance, take or drag your partner. If your partner doesn't want to go, too bad for you, stay home. We all know that-that kind of scene only lead to change of heart etc..
When this becomes a habit, the heart will slowly fade away.

[theking]

I see.  So you claim to be an expert with club scenes yet you haven't seen marriages broken by it?

Nope never claim to be an expert but been to the clubs enough times to see various reasons why people go to the clubs. And yes, I've seen marriage broken because people choose to ruin their marriage when they go to the clubs but I've also seen broken marriages because people choose to ruin their marriage when they are at home, at work, at the malls, at church, or even online like what we are doing now so going back to my point, the place don't matter, when cheaters want to cheat, they will cheat anywhere.. It's really a simple fact.

[theking]

ANY married men or women who goes to the club or to any dance party environment without their spouse is looking to hook up. No exceptions!!

This is NOT a narrow minded person's perceptions but the general perceptions.
If you are married you want to go out and dance, take or drag your partner. If your partner doesn't want to go, too bad for you, stay home. We all know that-that kind of scene only lead to change of heart etc..
When this becomes a habit, the heart will slowly fade away.

That is totally narrow minded. If you don't think so, feel free to back it up with some legitimate evidence showing "any" married person that goes to the club without his/her spouse only has the sole purpose of "hooking up"..

[theking]

And since being online actually ranked higher than the clubs for married people to cheat, based on your view, every married person that goes online also has the sole purpose of "hooking up"  right?

[baddabing]

You are what the elders considered bad wife. When you go out to parties without your husband so oftenly, you're not a very good wife to your husband and your husband is probably a really boring nerd too.

Incase you don't know going out to bars and clubs is potential disaster for your marriage especially if you have kids too. Those places will not have any good influences on you only negative.

Good luck...don't become a divorced statistic resulting from that life style.

[thePoster]

If I bump into you at the club ....im probabaly going to talk to you...you kow why?  Becuase it always goes like... you'll either like me and keep me all to yourself...or reject me...

Or what usually happens...youl l say..im married...but shes not and point me to your hot single friend!

[DuMa]

let me school you with some knowledge.

why? cause people don't respect marriage no more and do what they want. now knee before before me for proving how silly you are. OP is like that song, girls just wanna have fun and she trying so hard to hide her panties when she gets off on going out and causing trouble. 

Don't forget that 50% also end in happily ever after.  How they get there varies. 

It all depends on which clubs are we talking about here.  Give me a hmong club where it is known to the hmong community that divorcee is a common occurrence and i will show you a divorcee.  Take me to a white party and i can not. 

I was at the club last night.  6 women talked to me.  1 claimed married and one said she has a bf but i called her bluff by asking her to introduce me so i can congratulate the guy. 

My final verdict is that people goes to club by their own projection.  What intention brings you here should be the final verdict.  Clubbing don't make you bad or make you a hoee.  What you do with it will determines your upbringing or setfall.  I always see it like this and as the bible have taught.  Play by the sword n die by the sword.  Play with the club and be ready to get exposed by the clubbing lifestyle.  I've seen it all.  Fawk n bj in the club.  Passing out cold n groping.  Fall face first n broke front teeth.  Getting dui dwi.  Getting punched n fights and getting shot at.  A crow bar to my head lol ending up in a hospital.  White guy getting his azz kicked cuz me love you long time don't fly at an azn night club. 

The clubbing life is the nightlife and we all heard of lines like the freaks come out at night and sirens are being heard if u play the night life. 

If u club enough, you will see it.  If you don't then you have not club enough and are blessed that nothing bad has happen to u therefore you are safe.  It's still a numbers game so how good is your luck?  Keep on clubbing to find out.   

[Gen. Invincible]

Its all fun and games..but in the end your Hubbie is gonna find himself looking like an idiot when you run off with someone from that bar or club..its like DUH... he ain't the only man in the world..