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Author Topic: How I got out of jury duty  (Read 280 times)

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Offline DuMa

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How I got out of jury duty
« on: December 12, 2017, 11:53:29 AM »
So there were a bunch of people who went first and I heard all them excuses as people tries to slitter their way out of jury duty.  The judge already know this so he came prepared.  For those who says something like time conflict because I have an exam coming or I have to take my dad to his appointment, the judge says to come back in 6 months. 

When it was my azz, I had to think of something quick.  I realized that the law does not forbids one to hate one another, as long as you keep it to yourself and don't hurt people. 

I said your honor, I am prejudice against black people and if you put me up there, in going to hang that fool.  For 1 seconds, the whole room grew silent.  Then the judge says while looking at the guy, well he's not black, he's a dark Mexican. 

So I'm like, well I hate all those who reminds me of a black person.  The judge then looks at the public defender and he shakes his head and so that is how I got out of jury duty.

I hope my excuse will benefit some of y'all cuz jury duty can be a big waste of time.  I'm gripping going in for 1 day to do this, let alone having to come back for weeks or months for deliberation. 

Balls to the walls get the job done. 



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Offline ZDN

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #1 on: December 12, 2017, 12:32:19 PM »
should have told the judge that if he puts you on the jury, you will make them hang.


LOL...hung jury!



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Offline YAX

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #2 on: December 12, 2017, 12:39:18 PM »
I've always told them I'm an engineer.  That always works for me.  No need to say anything else. 



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Offline LION HEART

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #3 on: December 12, 2017, 12:53:58 PM »
My excuse to get out of jury duty...

Your honor, If I may... I have a wife, a mistress, and a girlfriend with seven kids each.  Besides, we're all here only because we already know this person is guilty.   

:police:  :police:  :police:




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Offline YAX

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #4 on: December 12, 2017, 01:10:36 PM »
One time, I kept it in but, felt like saying "Uhh.. The defendant is staring at me and it's kinda scary! I'm fearing for my life now. May I please be excused?"



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Offline DuMa

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #5 on: December 12, 2017, 02:36:27 PM »
One guy says it like a boss.  I'm ready for jury duty.  I have no job, no life, no wife, sign me up. As long as I get free bus passes, I'm willing to do what it takes to serve my country men. 

Dude got dismissed too.  Maybe they don't want a nut job, Crazy person in this high profile case. 

I will use that excuse next cuz I can't recycle my hating excuses for the court data entry gal be recording what I said. 

.



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Offline YAX

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #6 on: December 12, 2017, 02:55:24 PM »
They don't want anyone who can think either.  They really just want people who are easy to sell a story to.  ;D 



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Offline DaCurse

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #7 on: December 12, 2017, 09:35:29 PM »
just write back to them that you are not comfortable interacting with people,  nor like to be in groups or crowds. You will possibly never see another summon. I haven't for 15 years.



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Offline Reporter

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #8 on: December 13, 2017, 12:24:31 AM »
Is that why Obama, Bush, Clinton, and Biden and even Oprah weren't picked?

They don't want anyone who can think either.  They really just want people who are easy to sell a story to.  ;D



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Offline Reporter

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #9 on: December 13, 2017, 12:25:33 AM »
If this was a real situation, the judge could have just said, "Well, I think you can be honest. I can tell from your words that you can be.  We'll keep you in."

So there were a bunch of people who went first and I heard all them excuses as people tries to slitter their way out of jury duty.  The judge already know this so he came prepared.  For those who says something like time conflict because I have an exam coming or I have to take my dad to his appointment, the judge says to come back in 6 months. 

When it was my azz, I had to think of something quick.  I realized that the law does not forbids one to hate one another, as long as you keep it to yourself and don't hurt people. 

I said your honor, I am prejudice against black people and if you put me up there, in going to hang that fool.  For 1 seconds, the whole room grew silent.  Then the judge says while looking at the guy, well he's not black, he's a dark Mexican. 

So I'm like, well I hate all those who reminds me of a black person.  The judge then looks at the public defender and he shakes his head and so that is how I got out of jury duty.

I hope my excuse will benefit some of y'all cuz jury duty can be a big waste of time.  I'm gripping going in for 1 day to do this, let alone having to come back for weeks or months for deliberation. 

Balls to the walls get the job done.



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Offline YAX

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #10 on: December 13, 2017, 10:44:26 AM »
Is that why Obama, Bush, Clinton, and Biden and even Oprah weren't picked?
If someone smart, who's likely to side with you, was left on the jury, the other dude's got a bad lawyer.   O0



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Offline DuMa

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #11 on: December 13, 2017, 11:32:31 AM »
just write back to them that you are not comfortable interacting with people,  nor like to be in groups or crowds. You will possibly never see another summon. I haven't for 15 years.

I did the lack of the English language for my dad but can not use it on myself.  I think if you like under oath, you will get fawk big but before we started, we did not raise our hand n make any oath.  Just stood up for the judge and sit down. 

The one before it, I used the I work under contract so if I don't work, I don't get payed  excuse.  Saw a guy said he has a business so obviously he has money but said if he don't work, he will be behind on his bills and camping out in front of the Court House with the rest of them bums he may go.  Judge dismissed him too. 

If I have the time, I wouldn't mind serving just for the experience. 



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Offline Asharia

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #12 on: December 13, 2017, 12:42:49 PM »
You're a sorry excuse for a U.S. citizen. Next time just do your civic duty and stop making Viets, and by extension Southeast Asians, look bad.



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Offline ZDN

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #13 on: December 13, 2017, 12:45:12 PM »
You're a sorry excuse for a U.S. citizen. Next time just do your civic duty and stop making Viets, and by extension Southeast Asians, look bad.
DOH!   :2funny: :2funny:

dannng girl, revoked my citizenship!



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Offline DuMa

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Re: How I got out of jury duty
« Reply #14 on: December 13, 2017, 01:01:40 PM »
You're a sorry excuse for a U.S. citizen. Next time just do your civic duty and stop making Viets, and by extension Southeast Asians, look bad.

You can keep your citizenship but I'm taking the USA part with me. 

You know what would happen if you convict the wrong person? 

On you and see if god still loves you, you usa citizenship only by the foaming of the mouth. 



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