A woman desperate for a lover put up an ad in the paper:
"Looking for a man that will never beat me, leave me and able to satisfied me."
A week later as she was watching TV, someone ring the door bell. She opened the door and see a man with no arms and no legs.
She ask, "Can I help you?"
He reply, "I'm the man you have been looking for."
She told the men he must be mistaken...
He reply, "I don't have arm, so I'll never beat you. I don't have legs so I can never leave you."
She retort, "Yeah, but there's a third criteria..."
He quickly add, "How do you think I rang the doorbell?"