Misswildflower, you mentioned a fail marriage, care to share

[hmgROCK]

Recently newly wed
I like to learn on where you fail
So hopefully I don’t make the same mistake

If you willing to share your experience

[starchaser1989]

There is so so much more to it than just love, money, sex, education, etc. to make a marriage work and grow old together people. I see many young people today chasing after education, money, fun, etc. thinking to themselves that if they have this that they would be so happy and I just shake my head.  I once know a millionaire who said, she don't feel complete because she is unable to have a child of her own.  You can't have everything, if you understand this simple concept, you are already a head start and smarter than millions of people.   

[MissWildflower]

Recently newly wed
I like to learn on where you fail
So hopefully I don’t make the same mistake

If you willing to share your experience

Sure, I won't go into details about what happened, but I can give some simple advice from my experience. I wouldn't say I "failed"; I did try my very best, but in the end that still wasn't enough to save my marriage. When the other person doesn't love you anymore, it's just not going to work no matter how hard you try.

So, best advice would just be to always keep the flame going... take your wife out on dates, express your love openly to her, keep communication going... communication is key in a relationship so just make sure to keep that going strong.

[MissWildflower]

There is so so much more to it than just love, money, sex, education, etc. to make a marriage work and grow old together people. I see many young people today chasing after education, money, fun, etc. thinking to themselves that if they have this that they would be so happy and I just shake my head.  I once know a millionaire who said, she don't feel complete because she is unable to have a child of her own.  You can't have everything, if you understand this simple concept, you are already a head start and smarter than millions of people.

Yes, agree. Marriage takes a lot of hard work, compromise and diiscipline from both individuals to truly work. If both are not willing to sacrifice and contribute, then it's not going to work. Often times, when it fails is when one person is giving too much while the other is not giving enough or at all. It takes two to make it work.

[DuMa]

Blessed to those that saw my original post before they deleted it.  Here I go again. 

Marriage is like raising a child.  Some children are easier to raise.  They don't complain and they will eat everything.  Some are tough brats, harder to raise. 

I dumped a few women because it was impossible for me to raise them.  I gave my all but yet, they wanted more like I'm the princess more.  I blew my whole paycheck on her but that still not enough. 

So it is better to marry yourself someone that is easy to cater to.  The difficult ones always finds a reason to and such constraints can damper a relationship quickly. 

[DuMa]

There is one simple foundation that I think will make a marriage work or at least a happier marriage. 

When the other person enters the room, do your eyes light up and you want to smile or do you go....oh snap, here comes that biatch again attitude?

Being miserable with that other person around sux.  Why feeling changes?  It is because the other person has been exposed or gained the knowledge that there are other people out there that they can be with. 

[Mr_Mechanic]

man, ya'll giving advice like you guys are pro's.  psssst!!  the simple matter is, we don't know what tomorrow will bring.  what work for you, might not work for others.  what work for others, might not work for you.  we are not all the same.  different heart/mind.  I say little, you should know a lot.  MY BEST ADVICE IS (and by no means, I'm a pro), DON'T ASK PH FOR ADVICE.  we are really bad at it.   

[DuMa]

man, ya'll giving advice like you guys are pro's.  psssst!!  the simple matter is, we don't know what tomorrow will bring.  what work for you, might not work for others.  what work for others, might not work for you.  we are not all the same.  different heart/mind.  I say little, you should know a lot.  MY BEST ADVICE IS (and by no means, I'm a pro), DON'T ASK PH FOR ADVICE.  we are really bad at it.   

It is best to know before we engage.  At least you set yourself up for what you want out of it. 

We just can't go into a marriage like a game of dice.  Sure the unknown is the unknown but like a game of blackjack, the one that lasted longer is the one that can shrink the house advantage. 

[DuMa]

Simple question here. 

Who teaches you how to date and who teaches you how to make a marriage work?

How about no one?  You have to figure it out for yourselves. 

[Yebleng]

I have a question. Did you marry someone from ph? I want to know for future reference

[Mr_Mechanic]

I have a question. Did you marry someone from ph? I want to know for future reference

no, I didn't.

[MissWildflower]

I have a question. Did you marry someone from ph? I want to know for future reference

If you're asking me, no, I didn't.

[Gucci K]

man, ya'll giving advice like you guys are pro's.  psssst!!  the simple matter is, we don't know what tomorrow will bring.  what work for you, might not work for others.  what work for others, might not work for you.  we are not all the same.  different heart/mind.  I say little, you should know a lot.  MY BEST ADVICE IS (and by no means, I'm a pro), DON'T ASK PH FOR ADVICE.  we are really bad at it.   

I'm a pro at this...simple answer, don't cheat.  you cheat, 99% of the time it will ruin the relationship.  one can still have hard times at home, from abusive relationship to money issues, if one doesn't cheat, there is a higher chance of working things out...but if you pHuck someone on the side.  you can bet your relationship is over. 

[DuMa]

I'm a pro at this...simple answer, don't cheat.  you cheat, 99% of the time it will ruin the relationship.  one can still have hard times at home, from abusive relationship to money issues, if one doesn't cheat, there is a higher chance of working things out...but if you pHuck someone on the side.  you can bet your relationship is over.

So you are saying that she is a cheater in her story?

That's fine with me if she is.  I just need to find a gf first and then she can help me be a heartless cheater. 

[Reporter]

 

Blessed to those that saw my original post before they deleted it.  Here I go again. 

Marriage is like raising a child.  Some children are easier to raise.  They don't complain and they will eat everything.  Some are tough brats, harder to raise. 

I dumped a few women because it was impossible for me to raise them.  I gave my all but yet, they wanted more like I'm the princess more.  I blew my whole paycheck on her but that still not enough. 

So it is better to marry yourself someone that is easy to cater to.  The difficult ones always finds a reason to and such constraints can damper a relationship quickly.