I had a chit chat with my midwest cousin over the weekend. We thought the guy was doom cuz we never see him with any gf or date cuz the boy is a smart nerd, an engineering looking geek. I'm old but he's older than I am so you know how late in the game he is or was. Well he got married recently and now he's lecturing me about the value of time factor when it comes to marriage. He asked me to give me the west coast daily lifestyle and he compares it with his midwest life style.
So here in the northern cali bay area, we commuters spends something like 4 hours a day, round trip to get to and from work. So that's 4 hours a day wasted, sitting in traffic and sitting in your car. You go to work, stuck in traffic, you drive hella far, you head for home, you still stuck in traffic and by the time you get home, it is later in the day. Now assume that I have a wife with a child and they are in a house. He tells me that I am wasting my time just to hustle the money by being a Californian. His suggestion is for me to move anywhere else in the states (he's hinting me to move to where he's at) and work near home so that I can have more time to spend with my future wife and kid. We then had a back and forth debate and I'm always on the defensive side by saying...
1. It is a way of life here and we are used to it. He can not understand because he's a mid western guy and with him living in california and doing what I do best, he can not make it. Higher pay yeah but most of that money goes into housing and you are wasting valuable time, time that you could of spend with your love ones. Same can be said with myself being in the midwest cuz I already have tried living there, with my own condo and it is boring as hell on the weekdays but fun to split games on the weekends. I seriously can not make it there either. I find such lifestyle blended. No hard feelings towards you mid western folks.
2. I say I can not live without my friends. I like to live near my friends because they are my social backbone. Boys do need their boys time as well. He can not relate because he's a loner and his best friend now is his wife. I have no problem with that but he continues to preach that in a marriage relationship, you need to choose your wife over your boys. Any time spent with your boys is 0 hours spent with your wife.
There are other points but these two pointers are my headliners. How dare this mid western guy be trying to sway me to take his road to life? Although he does have a point though. Here in cali, we work to pay rent or mortgage. Why suffer like that when we can just move to the midwest where a 2 income family can easily buy a decent house and so the focus can be spend building up the relationship or starting a family than just going to work and be a slave to your housing issue.
If you guys have any pointers to who is right or who is wrong, voice up. I would like to get some ideas myself. Thanks