Can't really blame her husband for wanting to divorce her if true

[theking]

Husband wants divorce after wife 'lied' about birth control and got pregnant

A husband has taken to the internet looking for answers to his predicament, after revealing that his wife got pregnant when he thought she was on birth control.

The 31-year-old man says he’s now considering divorce over her ‘betrayal’ because he claims they had both agreed that they never wanted kids in the first place.

He took to Reddit to explain the whole thing, asking if he would be going overboard by divorcing his 29-year-old wife or asking her to get an abortion.

The man started off his post by saying that he had been putting off having a vasectomy because he was ‘procrastinating’ but he and his wife had still been using condoms when they got intimate and she has been on birth control since she was 14.

While he eventually bit the bullet and got the vasectomy two weeks ago, it seems it was two weeks too late.

“So about 2 weeks before the vasectomy, me and the wife were getting down to business and I realised that I’d ran out of condoms,” he started his post.

“She reminded me that she’s on birth control so we proceeded with the deed. I go get some more condoms after, vasectomy happens, and everything’s all good.”

It turns out that everything isn’t all good for him though, as his wife has just told him that she’s six weeks pregnant. No single method of birth control is 100 percent effective, but in this case, he says his wife admitted that she hadn’t been on her birth control for the past few months.

“On top of that, she wants to keep the kid which I am very against, she’s very f*****g ecstatic which shocked me ‘cause obviously she’s against having kids too,” he said.

[Reporter]

She's been having sex since 14.

Husband wants divorce after wife 'lied' about birth control and got pregnant

A husband has taken to the internet looking for answers to his predicament, after revealing that his wife got pregnant when he thought she was on birth control.

The 31-year-old man says he’s now considering divorce over her ‘betrayal’ because he claims they had both agreed that they never wanted kids in the first place.

He took to Reddit to explain the whole thing, asking if he would be going overboard by divorcing his 29-year-old wife or asking her to get an abortion.

The man started off his post by saying that he had been putting off having a vasectomy because he was ‘procrastinating’ but he and his wife had still been using condoms when they got intimate and she has been on birth control since she was 14.

While he eventually bit the bullet and got the vasectomy two weeks ago, it seems it was two weeks too late.

“So about 2 weeks before the vasectomy, me and the wife were getting down to business and I realised that I’d ran out of condoms,” he started his post.

“She reminded me that she’s on birth control so we proceeded with the deed. I go get some more condoms after, vasectomy happens, and everything’s all good.”

It turns out that everything isn’t all good for him though, as his wife has just told him that she’s six weeks pregnant. No single method of birth control is 100 percent effective, but in this case, he says his wife admitted that she hadn’t been on her birth control for the past few months.

“On top of that, she wants to keep the kid which I am very against, she’s very f*****g ecstatic which shocked me ‘cause obviously she’s against having kids too,” he said.

[Dok_Champa]

Even if true, it's not ground for divorce.   Yes things sometimes don't go as plan but he should learn to deal with it....because sometimes life will throw you curve ball.

[theking]

Depends..if they really committed to not having children and she refused to get an abortion even if it's an "accident" then it's ground for divorce as the trust has been broken...

[Dok_Champa]

I think the guy has children phobia and is not normal but most normal folks would react differently.  Life happens and normal people adapt to those unplan life circumstances. .that's what they do. 

[theking]

Life does happen at times but if she's true to her commitment with him, she should have no problems getting an abortion to uphold the words she has committed to her husband like many normal people would do. If she can't uphold her commitment and lied then it's already a bad start which is why I can't really blame the husband for wanting to part ways..The next lie will more than likely be bigger and more devastating... if she can't uphold her words.

[Dok_Champa]

That's just a whole bunch of excuses to escape responsibility .  Also, the guy went on to Reddit to ask if he "would be going overboard to divorce his wife and or ask for an abortion"....which means he wants VALIDATION because his conscience probably already condemn him for his extreme thoughts.

[DuMa]

Honest to gawd yall.  This is a coincidence but I have the most warmest dream ever.  I took a nap right and it was only a 15 minutes nap but I dreamt that the girl I'm fawking with came  up to me and told me that I have a child by the hmong name of nou or something like that.  I cried so much in my dream that it felt good.  I allowed myself to cry like how you see a toilet bowl and when you piss in your dream, it felt good right?   Only to have wet yourself in real life but that's the same "letting go" feeling that I had. 

Somewhere inside of me, I would be pleased to have a child. 

This fawking douche bag lives up to his name.  Don't want to have children and even goes as far as getting himself neutered just to make sure it is not going to happen.  Cold hearted mofo if you asking me.  A child is a gift so take it when it is unplanned.  Woman should divorce this jerk and keep the baby and tell the baby that its baby daddy is a douche bag for not wanting it. 

 

[theking]

It's not "extreme thoughts" if it was already agreed upon which is why his wife needs to do the right thing by upholding her commitment or he does have ground for a divorce.

Trying to escape responsibility is committing to something this serious and then lie about it..

No different than spouses committing to not cheat on each other and then lie about it.

If she can't uphold her commitment since she's the one that broke the trust, I think he should go his separate way because the next lie from her can be more devastated.

[DuMa]

If this was a legal battle, he wins because the terms were broken

however, I feel really bad for the child.  Because of it, mommy and daddy can no longer be together. 
The child don't even have a say into it. 

Both parties do not deserve to be with one another.  In life, we made a commitment to do such and such but in life, it also isn't so much perfect as plan and with that, both parties need to stick together and make decisions together. 

Just like when your azn daugther brings home a kaydoo and you hate kaydoo but eventually, you will have to become an inlaw to this kaydoo person.  Gotta learn to love him as an inlaw son somehow. 

Quit being ignorant.  Now you have a child, learn to love a little.  Break terms, break ways and learn how to change for once.  It isn't all that bad.  Some people can't even have children. 

[Dok_Champa]

The husband, to me, seems like those controlling type and a little selfish who sees things only in HIS WAY.  Sure, sometimes in life the unexpected happens, life throw you a curve ball but why should SHE, the wife, gets punished for it?  Because he said so?  It's her fault?

Most people use common sense, adapt to change....

In a marriage, there's many a time where the unexpected happens.. Most people don't kick their wive or husbands to the curve..  They work out a solution.

Ground for divorce?  For controlling freak...yeah ground for divorce..

[theking]

If this was a legal battle, he wins because the terms were broken

however, I feel really bad for the child.  Because of it, mommy and daddy can no longer be together. 
The child don't even have a say into it. 

Both parties do not deserve to be with one another.  In life, we made a commitment to do such and such but in life, it also isn't so much perfect as plan and with that, both parties need to stick together and make decisions together. 

Just like when your azn daugther brings home a kaydoo and you hate kaydoo but eventually, you will have to become an inlaw to this kaydoo person.  Gotta learn to love him as an inlaw son somehow. 

Quit being ignorant.  Now you have a child, learn to love a little.  Break terms, break ways and learn how to change for once.  It isn't all that bad.  Some people can't even have children.

I think he would win too since he wasn't the one that broke the commitment because she didn't want any kids either.

If she changes her mind and wants to keep the child now, she should apologize to her husband for breaking the trust and take full responsibility for her lie. Therefore if her husband still wants to divorce, just agree to it and raise the child by herself.

Having worked in the social services field, I've seen my fair share of people that don't really want to have children but have it anyways for selfish reasons such as a source of income (welfare check) and the children ended up paying for that bad decision i.e., neglected, CPS involvement, killed, etc.

Bottom line is if a couple already committed to not wanting kids, who ever broke that commitment should take full responsibility for it and the one that actually uphold to the commitment should not bear any blame for what happens after. 

[theking]

The husband, to me, seems like those controlling type and a little selfish who sees things only in HIS WAY.  Sure, sometimes in life the unexpected happens, life throw you a curve ball but why should SHE, the wife, gets punished for it?  Because he said so?  It's her fault?

Most people use common sense, adapt to change....

In a marriage, there's many a time where the unexpected happens.. Most people don't kick their wive or husbands to the curve..  They work out a solution.

Ground for divorce?  For controlling freak...yeah ground for divorce..

Actually he's the innocent party since he didn't broke his commitment. His wife on the other hand did so she should take full responsibility for it.

Most people with common sense wouldn't break their commitment in the first place.

I don't think this is something "unexpected" since she lied. Depends on the situation, some do kick their spouse to the curb and deservingly so for lying and breaking commitments.

Yep, when a commitment is this serious and one spouse broke the trust and commitment, it's enough for ground for divorce.

Let's flip the situation:

If a couple commits to having children but then one lied down the road and doesn't want to have kids anymore, I also can't really blame the one that stays true to his/her commitment for wanting a divorce either.

[DuMa]

I wonder if he can get away without paying child support.   Like a verbal contract is still a contract. 

This case reminds me of a has been ph member that I argued the importance of marriage to have children.  The homegirl was firm with her stance and boy, would I like to use this case to rip her apart.   

[theking]

Hit that jackpot in Reno and you can have as many kids as you like, I mean just look at friggen Philip Rivers for goodness sake (it's like a typical Hmong family) with 9 kids (if counting the newborn that arrived back in March)..: