Advertisement

Author Topic: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???  (Read 3477 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline SummerBerry

  • Elite Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 18734
  • Respect: +203
    • View Profile
How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« on: November 05, 2019, 02:38:38 PM »
My bil owes us a little over 5k and it is time to pay up. 



Like this post: 0

Adverstisement

Offline one-tai

  • Jr. Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 1078
  • Respect: +37
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #1 on: November 05, 2019, 02:50:02 PM »
Is he your sister's husband or your husband's brother. What is his relationship to you exactly?



Like this post: 0

Offline one-tai

  • Jr. Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 1078
  • Respect: +37
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #2 on: November 05, 2019, 02:51:01 PM »
The reason why I ask is because will you be the one asking for it back or will it be your husband.



Like this post: 0

Offline Reporter

  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 84273
  • Pey-Pey and NiNi's 1st Snow Kid.
  • Respect: +562
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #3 on: November 05, 2019, 02:51:31 PM »
When's the due date?



Like this post: 0
"...
The snooping eye sees everything."--Ono No Komachi, Japanese Poetess (emphasis)

Offline one-tai

  • Jr. Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 1078
  • Respect: +37
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #4 on: November 05, 2019, 02:52:12 PM »
Was there a written agreement as well?



Like this post: 0

Offline Reporter

  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 84273
  • Pey-Pey and NiNi's 1st Snow Kid.
  • Respect: +562
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #5 on: November 05, 2019, 02:54:37 PM »
They are Hmong and very close, too. I don't think there was ever a written contract. They have relied on trust and integrity of each individual involved.

But now there seems to be reluctance to go forth with the payment.

Was there a written agreement as well?



Like this post: 0
"...
The snooping eye sees everything."--Ono No Komachi, Japanese Poetess (emphasis)

Offline one-tai

  • Jr. Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 1078
  • Respect: +37
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #6 on: November 05, 2019, 02:58:20 PM »
They are Hmong and very close, too. I don't think there was ever a written contract. They have relied on trust and integrity of each individual involved.

But now there seems to be reluctance to go forth with the payment.

That's never the case with me and I'm Hmong. A written statement even if it was written on a napkin ensures that both parties will comply.



Like this post: 0

Offline DuMa

  • Elite Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 17907
  • Gender: Male
  • -(>^_^<)- 052806
  • Respect: +742
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #7 on: November 05, 2019, 03:01:19 PM »
You play the needy table.  Ok, the total is 5K.  You ask to borrow $200.  If they have the intention to pay you all back, they will mention you that they still owe you and they will subtract the difference. 

Shady is if they will not even let you borrow the $200 when you lend them a larger amount in the past.  Consider the money is gone unless you take them to court with docs to supplement your case. 

It all depends on how much you value the family ties.  If they shady, they are not family so I would treat them like a business transaction and will try to get the money back the legal way.  It was they who threw the first stone so no guilty consciousness on your side. 

Now if they needed more time, at least they acknowledge the loan and that is more tolerable. 



Like this post: 0
X_____________ ______________ ______________ ___

Offline Reporter

  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 84273
  • Pey-Pey and NiNi's 1st Snow Kid.
  • Respect: +562
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #8 on: November 05, 2019, 03:02:52 PM »
Maybe you aren't close to your contractors.

I met a Hmong guy who borrowed 2.5K from a relative to help his son do the son's wedding, because neither the son or the dil had any money to get married. There was no writing. The son and dil fled after their wedding. But the guy later paid it all back himself. I asked him why. He said, "I agreed to it."

Some Hmong are that strong to stand up to their promises.

That's never the case with me and I'm Hmong. A written statement even if it was written on a napkin ensures that both parties will comply.



Like this post: 0
"...
The snooping eye sees everything."--Ono No Komachi, Japanese Poetess (emphasis)

Offline one-tai

  • Jr. Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 1078
  • Respect: +37
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #9 on: November 05, 2019, 03:10:51 PM »
Maybe you aren't close to your contractors.

I met a Hmong guy who borrowed 2.5K from a relative to help his son do the son's wedding, because neither the son or the dil had any money to get married. There was no writing. The son and dil fled after their wedding. But the guy later paid it all back himself. I asked him why. He said, "I agreed to it."

Some Hmong are that strong to stand up to their promises.

You mean loaning money to my cousin who is my dad's brother's son isn't close?  ???



Like this post: 0

Offline Reporter

  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 84273
  • Pey-Pey and NiNi's 1st Snow Kid.
  • Respect: +562
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #10 on: November 05, 2019, 03:25:41 PM »
Maybe you lent more than SB did.

You mean loaning money to my cousin who is my dad's brother's son isn't close?  ???



Like this post: 0
"...
The snooping eye sees everything."--Ono No Komachi, Japanese Poetess (emphasis)

Offline one-tai

  • Jr. Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 1078
  • Respect: +37
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #11 on: November 05, 2019, 03:39:46 PM »
Maybe you lent more than SB did.

3K.  ???



Like this post: 0

Offline theking

  • Elite Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 57536
  • Respect: +1296
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #12 on: November 05, 2019, 03:48:04 PM »
My bil owes us a little over 5k and it is time to pay up.

I would say what you just said above, "time to pay up".

Be nice but also be firm...

Be honest and upfront about it, no need to beat around the bush especially since you're family...

The lender should never need to ask for the money back in cases like this but unfortunately, there are some cases where those that were helped in the past don't care to do their part by keeping their words and pay it back...Sad but true..


« Last Edit: November 05, 2019, 03:53:03 PM by theking »

Like this post: 0

Offline Cali Guy

  • Jr. Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 3164
  • Respect: +638
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #13 on: November 05, 2019, 10:23:00 PM »
Cases like yours is why I donít loan money period, my policy. Many people are quick to ask for an interest free loan but paying it back is another story.

Phone call that you are coming over in a week or whenever he can get the money together to pick up the loan.




Like this post: 0

Offline hmgROCK

  • Elite Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 34432
  • The Hmong Nostradamus
  • Respect: +216
    • View Profile
Re: How do you kindly tell someone to pay back money.....???
« Reply #14 on: November 06, 2019, 06:41:41 AM »
Damn

Why you lend $5k??
Thatís wayyyyy too much money

I will just ask them to pay
Before they forget they borrow



Like this post: 0
God did not created man...man created god

 

Advertisements