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Author Topic: Divorce or annulment?  (Read 5488 times)

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Offline Rebel

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Divorce or annulment?
« on: March 04, 2021, 01:43:23 PM »
A little back story on my marriage to my ex husband.

We meet at work. I dated him very shortly when he proposed. I was never ready and I DID NOT WANT TO MARRY HIM!!!
He took me to the courthouse one day after he picked me up for work...

When we got there I asked him what were we’re doing, he said we were getting married. I said NO, I needed time to think/ time to plan etc!

He said we can have the wedding later and go do the ceremony at the courthouse first. He literally dragged me into the building against my will...When we got there he paid a fee and he picked out a date for us which was in two days to go back and say our vows in front of the judge and etc. well, I didn’t agree to it. I keep telling him no. But he got mad, and threatened me. I got scared for some reason and he asked two of my family members to be witnesses on that day. Like the whole thing was staged and planned but I had not idea what hit me until everything was done...I was still processing the whole thing but I knew I never agree to it. I never wanted to marry him and feel like I was forced and threatened into it.

After the ceremony, we were driving home he said to me,

“if I didn’t do it this way, you would of never got it done and it would of lagged and went on forever”

But I never wanted to marry him! And for many years I’m resentful of it and for myself being young and stupid!!! I felt like this whole marriage was a damn lie. If I could have it my way I would have it annulled. But I’m not sure if this is the best route for me. We married a little under ten years but close... I feel like I would never be at peace with getting divorce from someone I never wanted to marry in the first place but then again my emotion always gets in the way...

If you were in this situation would you divorce him or have an annulment?



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Offline walley

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #1 on: March 04, 2021, 01:56:40 PM »
Just get a divorce and move on. Easy peezy!



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hmgPebble dumb as a rock

Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #2 on: March 04, 2021, 02:07:13 PM »
Just get a divorce and move on. Easy peezy!

 I never new about annulment. But I want to wipe the whole thing like it never existed.



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Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #3 on: March 04, 2021, 02:10:10 PM »
I need to know what’s best bc that fools back and trying things w me. I have so much anxiety over this whole thing, lol freaking me out and I don’t know what will change if I pick one over the other



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Offline Reporter

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #4 on: March 04, 2021, 02:13:43 PM »
What state are you in, Rebel?

Marriage laws vary among the states.



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The snooping eye sees everything."--Ono No Komachi, Japanese Poetess (emphasis)

Offline walley

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #5 on: March 04, 2021, 02:15:14 PM »
Yeah good point. It varies by state, but you probably should just go talk with a lawyer.



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hmgPebble dumb as a rock

Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #6 on: March 04, 2021, 02:16:10 PM »
That's some f*cked up shit right there.

I would personally want an annulment, but I don't know how easily it would be to get it annulled if you have been married for that long. If you had done it right after the whole incident took place, it might have been easy.

What did you end up doing?

I feel like I should annulled but the years we been together might effect the outcome. Like the judge might say no bc of how long it’s been. I’m not sure at the moment.



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Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #7 on: March 04, 2021, 02:21:41 PM »
What state are you in, Rebel?

Marriage laws vary among the states.

California



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Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #8 on: March 04, 2021, 02:24:16 PM »
Wait, you called him your ex-husband, but you're still legally married?

I think if you want an annulment, you'll have to check your state laws. You will probably have to provide proof of why you want an annulment, which apparently can be hard to do. Also, there may be a statute of limitations.

Otherwise, you may have to suck it up and just divorce him. Asap, at that 'cause he sounds crazy. You may want to ghost him after the divorce too. Just sayin'.  :-X

I believe we were legally separated. I can’t remember lol I’m a little terrified of him so that’s why I stalled the divorce process. I didn’t want to make a mistake..



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Offline Reporter

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #9 on: March 04, 2021, 02:35:03 PM »
Check with an attorney there then.

California



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Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #10 on: March 04, 2021, 02:37:56 PM »
Yeah good point. It varies by state, but you probably should just go talk with a lawyer.

I know I need to talk to a lawyer but I just want to know what some people experiences were with getting an annulment and divorce. I feel like I’m going in kind of blind bc I don’t know what to expect. Never been through it and it’s giving me so much anxiety plus family members/friend have very little idea were ending our marriage. Some people still thinks we’re together lol



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Offline Reporter

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #11 on: March 04, 2021, 03:10:40 PM »
Sounds like it's been years. How many kids do you two have already?

I know I need to talk to a lawyer but I just want to know what some people experiences were with getting an annulment and divorce. I feel like I’m going in kind of blind bc I don’t know what to expect. Never been through it and it’s giving me so much anxiety plus family members/friend have very little idea were ending our marriage. Some people still thinks we’re together lol


« Last Edit: March 04, 2021, 03:15:15 PM by Reporter »

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Offline Dok_Champa

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #12 on: March 04, 2021, 04:41:54 PM »
If I qualify, annulment.  Requirements may vary state by state so it's best to consult an attorney to know your options.



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But true love is a durable fire, In the mind ever burning, Never sick, never old, never dead, From itself never turning.<br />               --Sir Walter Raleigh

Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #13 on: March 04, 2021, 04:52:50 PM »
Sounds like it's been years. How many kids do you two have already?

None, he dislikes kids :(



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Offline Rebel

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Re: Divorce or annulment?
« Reply #14 on: March 04, 2021, 04:54:39 PM »
I nicely brought up annulment and he threatened me lmao. I don’t want to be harmed over it. It’s just that if I was a ghost, I will never be able to Rest In Peace over it



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