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Author Topic: why does my inlaws (i'm the vauv) expect us to take care of them?  (Read 418 times)

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Anonymous

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Re: why does my inlaws (i'm the vauv) expect us to take care of them?
« Reply #15 on: April 05, 2021, 05:13:52 PM »
Hmong culture is retarded and paranoid. No wonder we don't have a country of our own.  ::)
I don't understand your logic. In what way is the Hmong culture retarded and/or paranoid? There is no one perfect culture. I don't hear it as much anymore but your "...and that's why we don't have our own country" argument is rather shortsighted. How many people, do you think, are willing to give up their life in the US to build a country from the ground up? I'm pretty sure a lot of people from my generation wouldn't want to (though it would be nice to be proven wrong). I think it's rather insulting for those who died for you to be here to make lofty comments. As far I'm concern, the US is already my country.



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Anonymous

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Re: why does my inlaws (i'm the vauv) expect us to take care of them?
« Reply #16 on: April 06, 2021, 02:01:15 AM »
I don't understand your logic. In what way is the Hmong culture retarded and/or paranoid? There is no one perfect culture. I don't hear it as much anymore but your "...and that's why we don't have our own country" argument is rather shortsighted. How many people, do you think, are willing to give up their life in the US to build a country from the ground up? I'm pretty sure a lot of people from my generation wouldn't want to (though it would be nice to be proven wrong). I think it's rather insulting for those who died for you to be here to make lofty comments. As far I'm concern, the US is already my country.

How am I short-sighted even I had lived in U.S. longer than you do? Perhaps you're the one who's short-sighted. I have seen a lot of bad sh!ets coming from our own people when you ain't born yet. The word 'retarded' insult them. Hmff.. sound like their ignorance and arrogance insult themselves. It's nothing to do with contribution that our forefathers and foremothers did for us and they brought us here to have better life. It's nothing to do with imperfection either. So tell me. I haven't seen changes all these muddafawking years. Why is that? It has to do with their fear of denying and hiding feeling of remorse & shame to avoid publicity. That's Hmong #1 primary weakness and they don't wanna solve their own problem but rather bury their head in the rabbit hole. Do they fawking own it? Hell no. They're chicken-wuss. So much for new leaf, my arse.  :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:



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Anonymous

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Re: why does my inlaws (i'm the vauv) expect us to take care of them?
« Reply #17 on: April 06, 2021, 08:51:18 AM »
OP here:

Wife and I don't make much $$ and having to take care of 4 OG's will put a major burden on us financially. Not to mention, we don't have that much time to be taking care of them at the same time. We're newly weds and just about to get going with our life and can't afford to be in this situation atm. My parents and inlaws are all in their early 70's.

My siblings are losers so they can't take my parents in so I have no choice. My dag laugs (spellings) make much more $$$ but lives out of town and don't wanna hassle with taking care of the inlaws since we live in town. The wife will have to talk to her bros when thw time comes and the time is near.  She will have to talk to her parents too. Almost seem like her parents do not want to move in with the sons because they live out of town and the parents don't want to move out of town.  We live in town, so they expect us to take them in knowing my own parents also live in town too.
Your in-law may have to move out of town because that's where their sons are.  Yes, your wife and her siblings will have to have a family meeting and go from there, that's all you can do for now.  If you take your in-laws without the family meeting, later on the dab laug will say you took them without consent and therefore made you out to look like the "bad guys."  Clear everything from the start  including, what happens when mom and died passed, who is going to handle what, get sick, this or that.... Clear everything, put everything on the table...before you do anything..... and again, if worse come to worse, no one wants to take the in-laws, you and your wife can decide what you want to do. 



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Anonymous

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Re: why does my inlaws (i'm the vauv) expect us to take care of them?
« Reply #18 on: April 06, 2021, 01:36:41 PM »
How am I short-sighted even I had lived in U.S. longer than you do?
That's great! My comment was never to dispute your lifetime of living in the US. What I meant by shortsighted was simply the fact that you're assuming Hmong people (at least the millennial US Hmong) would want to go back to build a country from the ground up in whatever part of Asia they desire. The idea of having a Hmong country was simply a pipe dream of the older generations who are now probably in their 70s/80s. If Hmong were so adamant about having their own country, wouldn't you think the displaced persons of Hmong origin still residing in Laos would have done that by now? Having one's own country does not stability make. There exist countless people groups without a country doing perfectly fine. There are also countless people groups with a country and it's in shambles. Which one would you prefer?

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Perhaps you're the one who's short-sighted. I have seen a lot of bad sh!ets coming from our own people when you ain't born yet.
I admit. I am. I'm quite removed from the Hmong community; I don't know much.

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The word 'retarded' insult them. Hmff.. sound like their ignorance and arrogance insult themselves.
I don't understand this. So you're calling those who advocate for their own country retarded because they're blinded by their own ignorance and arrogance? So what if they are. How does that hurt you? You seem to be pretty smart so just walk away.
 
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It's nothing to do with contribution that our forefathers and foremothers did for us and they brought us here to have better life. It's nothing to do with imperfection either.
Yes, they brought us here to have a better life.. and we didn't need to have our own country do that did we? What I was trying to get at was that they died so you can be here, to have the possibility of becoming something greater than what a communist regime or the mountains of Laos can offer. What you do with that knowledge is your own prerogative.

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So tell me. I haven't seen changes all these muddafawking years. Why is that? It has to do with their fear of denying and hiding feeling of remorse & shame to avoid publicity. That's Hmong #1 primary weakness and they don't wanna solve their own problem but rather bury their head in the rabbit hole. Do they fawking own it? Hell no. They're chicken-wuss. So much for new leaf, my arse.  :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:
This sounds like you have personal issue with someone/something or some organization I know nothing about.


You know, it's great to be armchair philosophers and keyboard warriors criticizing how ineffective government, people, and organizations are. There's no accountability on anyone's part as it's always "their" fault that x,y,z is the way it is. Personally, I'm very ignorant when it comes to the happenings of the Hmong community. Can things be better? Absolutely. Are things that bad? Nope. I think the best solution is just to keep the culture alive. I don't know about other people but ethnically I feel very Hmong and at the same time very proud of my American nationality. It is the duality of how we exist today. I don't see it changing anytime soon.

Anyway.. that's my 2cents. I don't want to be hijacking the original intention of this thread. Stay safe.



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