Hmoob tej tub zoo nraug heev! The man who sings this is so handsome!

[Believe_N_Me]

Back then you can tell the regional group that boys and girls were from based on their clothes. Parents didn't like us to wear clothes that weren't our region, except for daim tiab Hmoob leeg. I know some parents who only wanted their sons to ball toss with girls from their region so they looked out for the Hmong clothes.

[Reporter]

True on the regional identification s.

Elders believed, and many still do, that it's an easier wedding and easier relationship if there aren't too many differences between the clans and the couples. A daughter-in-law already knows the daily activities of the in-laws and, so, there's not much discipline or screaming or uncomfortable silent treatments needed around the house.

[Believe_N_Me]

True on the regional identification s.

Elders believed, and many still do, that it's an easier wedding and easier relationship if there aren't too many differences between the clans and the couples. A daughter-in-law already knows the daily activities of the in-laws and, so, there's not much discipline or screaming or uncomfortable silent treatments needed around the house.

Some mother-in-laws are definitely very strict about who their sons court. Es koj mom ne? Is she willing to give you up to just any woman?

Koj mom nyiam tus nyab zoo li cas?

[Reporter]

My mom is very open to anyone to take her son as a groom. She's more worried about me not finding anyone than restricting me to any particular group. I had a few dates that seemed promising and she never cautioned me about any of them.

Kuv niam nyiam tus nyab uas txawj hwm nws thiab nws tus tub li wb yuav hwm tus nyab ntawd. Ua ab tsi los txhob cais cais nws; hos nws ua ab tsi los nws tsis cais tus nyab. Yus ho cais nws los nws thab hais li cas li thiab. Nws hais tias nyias muaj nyias cwj pwm es tsuav yus ob tug sib hlub tau no xwb. Yog tus tub tsis txawj hlub tus nyab ces nws cem tus tub; hos yog tus nyab tsis hlub tus tub ces nws kav liam xwb. Nws tsis nrog tus nyab sib cav sib ceg ab tsi.

Puas muaj cov nyab ua tau li ne yom? Peb cov ntxhais Hmoob tam sim no ces tsis tshua xis cov laus lawm.

Some mother-in-laws are definitely very strict about who their sons court. Es koj mom ne? Is she willing to give you up to just any woman?

Koj mom nyiam tus nyab zoo li cas?

[Believe_N_Me]

If you marry a Hmong son then you have to accept that his parents come with the package. I disagree with those who try to live apart and say they will take in parents when they're old. By then you wouldn't have bonded and trust me, if you don't want them when they were young, you won't want them when they're old. Better to be used to each other's habits, I say.

Your mom probably has a lot of sons to feel that way about her nyabs.

[Reporter]

She has 3 nyabs right now. A fourth one soon, if I can hook one.

It is true that Hmong sons come with parents.

[Believe_N_Me]

We have an aunt who has 9 sons. She tells me that 9 sons with 9 wives are a lot of drama. She has to do the loving more than the other way around since muaj muaj kev sib khib.

[Reporter]

The nyabs are coming from different clans and regions. Now, you know why the elders want their sons to stick to local girls for nyabs.

[Believe_N_Me]

The nyabs are coming from different clans and regions. Now, you know why the elders want their sons to stick to local girls for nyabs.

True.

[Reporter]

Many of our people still need to learn how to get along, regardless of what our regions are.

[Believe_N_Me]

I hope that it's getting better. It seems like it.

[Reporter]

It is.

[Believe_N_Me]

Cov laus pais kawg lawg tas lawm ces tsis muaj cov khoo tej tub ntxhais nruj nruj lawm. A lot of young people nowadays don't know what region their family is from. Those who do not speak Hmong do not even know if they are white or green Hmong.

[Reporter]

Yet they have this nationalistic attitude.

[Believe_N_Me]

Azian Pryde?