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Author Topic: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...  (Read 1284 times)

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Offline Believe_N_Me

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I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« on: February 03, 2023, 02:53:14 PM »
...had better choices to choose from when it came to finding a life partner.

Meeting people is certainly easier and getting a bf/gf is more likely to happen. But quality? I learned from my cousins that quantity doesn't equal quality. It seemed that the large Hmong community they lived in was riddled with scandal and corruption. Because it was so easy to meet new people, couples were not that loyal to each other and didn't put much effort in building a good relationship. Families and clans were also not that respectful towards each other. This created a lot of distrust and therefore, anybody who was a decent person was actually more picky and cautious.


« Last Edit: February 04, 2023, 10:37:23 PM by Believe_N_Me »

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #1 on: February 03, 2023, 04:41:09 PM »
I don't know but growing up in large Hmong communities, all I know was for every decent Hmong girl, there were 100 dudes trying to call her every night..and if she is ever single, it's probably for only 24 hours max...lols

so yeah whereas if you were to go to a smaller Hmong community, chances are the Hmong there are a little more on the whitewashed side...so they didn't really put themselves out like that...but then she probably wasn't into Hmong dudes because she grew up getting hit on by mostly non-Hmong dudes...lols as for the dudes, they probably prefer white girls..lols



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Offline DuMa

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #2 on: February 03, 2023, 06:11:42 PM »
This is a social issue within your own hmong community and for them to figure it out.  You got hmong refusing to do business with another hmong and the more closer you are to a hmong infested community, you also get them hmong stereotype for having the hmong divorcees around. 

You know why there is a chinatown right?  It is for the illegals to hide out from the white man.  Their society works well for them.  My people are the same way.  We like to live closer to each other because we support one another and we come together as a community to compete with the white folks. Vietnamese new year?  Oh boy, it is beautiful this year.  Lots of events all over. 

So you see, what you dislike also tells you something about yourself.  Perhaps you too are the problem.   O0



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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #3 on: February 04, 2023, 11:01:19 AM »
our parents we're able to  find partners easily, because they were simple back then...as long as two were opposite genders and different last names, then it's on...lols

today is different...th ere's all kinds and types of Hmong today...that eventually a lot of Hmong just slowly abandon the Hmong communtiies and truly become a melting pot...haha



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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #4 on: February 04, 2023, 10:40:28 PM »
I don't know but growing up in large Hmong communities, all I know was for every decent Hmong girl, there were 100 dudes trying to call her every night..and if she is ever single, it's probably for only 24 hours max...lols

so yeah whereas if you were to go to a smaller Hmong community, chances are the Hmong there are a little more on the whitewashed side...so they didn't really put themselves out like that...but then she probably wasn't into Hmong dudes because she grew up getting hit on by mostly non-Hmong dudes...lols as for the dudes, they probably prefer white girls..lols

Which is why it's harder for that decent person to discern which one out of the 100 is also going to be decent. This holds true for both a good man and woman. Everyone in that community is after them and it can actually make it harder.



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Offline DuMa

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2023, 01:46:31 PM »
I know one thing though. 

Hmong OG parents are the dumbest folks with their dumb gossips.  You know the story about my boy that left his wife and kids for a woman that is a 2x divorcees and has grown children that even my boy would shag?  Well they met in Fresno new year and I want to tell you guys that these new years are bad for business.  All these hmongs from everywhere jamming into one event and there will be flirting going on and many families will be broken through undisclosed infidelity. 

So my boy does it all on his own.  He went by himself.  2 years later, he and this old chick of his from MN got the balls to go back to his parents house in Cali for a visit.  They threw a party there so I was invited.  It sounds like an engagement party or maybe voodoo blessings for the parents, I dunno but what I do know is that his mom kept on looking at me like I'm the devil.  His dad told me that he liked me but he hates what I do.  He said I kept on coming over to his house and take his son out partying and to the bars.  It did not hit me right then and there or else I would of biatch the chit out of them for the truth.  It hits me the day after to what his dad told me.  The nerves of these OG i'm telling you.  They are blaming an innocent man.  So my boy grew up with his cousin which is also my other boy.  They are more closer since they are first cousin but why not blame on him you know?  You want to know why they are not going to blame on his best friend?  It is to save face.  No one wants to blame on your first cousin or else you get OG fighting other OG elders.  They got to blame on me cuz I'm not hmong.   Next time I see them to straighten things out will be who knows when.  All I can do now is to talk to my boy, talk to his brother, talk to his sisters if I ever see them and talk to whoever that is connected to dude cuz I need their backs to go tell their parents the truth.  I'm not the guy that took your son out and got him to meet up with some stranger chick that ruins his marriage.  His wife moved on and moved in with a flip dude.  His kids are now with her parents.  His kids were invited to the party but no one came.  I can't blame them. They were not ready to see their old man and his new future wife. 

I hate to be false accused.  I can't wait to biatch at his dad's face and tell him to clear my name with his parents too.  Maybe, I'm just saying maybe, to go home and not fear shame, he might tell his parents that I'm the fall guy and it was my fault.  I hope that is not the case.  No matter, I'll biatch at them all too.  I got back up evidences.  What do they have? 

You know what?  I'll even tell them that in the Christian religion, if you falsely accuse someone without proof, that is a sin and you are going to hell.  After I tell them that, I'll say, sir, madame, I don't want you guys to go to hell and then I'll leave it at that for them to think it through. 

I hate primitive hmong OG elders who can not think right.  I don't lose sleep over this cuz I can't control if people are dumb.  I can only control on my side.   :idiot2:


« Last Edit: February 06, 2023, 01:49:32 PM by DuMa »

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Offline Dok_Champa

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #6 on: February 07, 2023, 09:59:49 AM »
Just find someone you get along well with and who loves you, that's enough.



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Offline lexicon

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #7 on: February 07, 2023, 10:55:50 AM »
No need to limit oneself. By looking for specific characteristic s, attributes and etc you've already decreased your chances of finding a potential partner exponentially.




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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #8 on: February 07, 2023, 10:47:33 PM »
I know one thing though. 

Hmong OG parents are the dumbest folks with their dumb gossips.  You know the story about my boy that left his wife and kids for a woman that is a 2x divorcees and has grown children that even my boy would shag?  Well they met in Fresno new year and I want to tell you guys that these new years are bad for business.  All these hmongs from everywhere jamming into one event and there will be flirting going on and many families will be broken through undisclosed infidelity. 

So my boy does it all on his own.  He went by himself.  2 years later, he and this old chick of his from MN got the balls to go back to his parents house in Cali for a visit.  They threw a party there so I was invited.  It sounds like an engagement party or maybe voodoo blessings for the parents, I dunno but what I do know is that his mom kept on looking at me like I'm the devil.  His dad told me that he liked me but he hates what I do.  He said I kept on coming over to his house and take his son out partying and to the bars.  It did not hit me right then and there or else I would of biatch the chit out of them for the truth.  It hits me the day after to what his dad told me.  The nerves of these OG i'm telling you.  They are blaming an innocent man.  So my boy grew up with his cousin which is also my other boy.  They are more closer since they are first cousin but why not blame on him you know?  You want to know why they are not going to blame on his best friend?  It is to save face.  No one wants to blame on your first cousin or else you get OG fighting other OG elders.  They got to blame on me cuz I'm not hmong.   Next time I see them to straighten things out will be who knows when.  All I can do now is to talk to my boy, talk to his brother, talk to his sisters if I ever see them and talk to whoever that is connected to dude cuz I need their backs to go tell their parents the truth.  I'm not the guy that took your son out and got him to meet up with some stranger chick that ruins his marriage.  His wife moved on and moved in with a flip dude.  His kids are now with her parents.  His kids were invited to the party but no one came.  I can't blame them. They were not ready to see their old man and his new future wife. 

I hate to be false accused.  I can't wait to biatch at his dad's face and tell him to clear my name with his parents too.  Maybe, I'm just saying maybe, to go home and not fear shame, he might tell his parents that I'm the fall guy and it was my fault.  I hope that is not the case.  No matter, I'll biatch at them all too.  I got back up evidences.  What do they have? 

You know what?  I'll even tell them that in the Christian religion, if you falsely accuse someone without proof, that is a sin and you are going to hell.  After I tell them that, I'll say, sir, madame, I don't want you guys to go to hell and then I'll leave it at that for them to think it through. 

I hate primitive hmong OG elders who can not think right.  I don't lose sleep over this cuz I can't control if people are dumb.  I can only control on my side.   :idiot2:

Apparently, a lot of men don't mind older women for convenience.





« Last Edit: February 07, 2023, 11:40:15 PM by Believe_N_Me »

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #9 on: February 07, 2023, 10:56:36 PM »
I don't know..nothing really wrong with someone putting themselves out there and allowing a hundred people to hit on them..keep their options open..lols but I always prefer the girls that don't believe in dating, only a relationship. haha Im not sure if my wife was talking or going on friendly dates with other dudes when I first met her..I'll have to asked her..i think she really liked me..and I didn't really liked her at first due to her Relaxing haha face attitude..lols ..at least I felt I was her number one choice if anything..lmao so yeah, i think that was the key..if I have to compete for someone, than simply she don't belong to me..that's just how I saw it...haha



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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #10 on: February 07, 2023, 10:59:46 PM »
No need to limit oneself. By looking for specific characteristic s, attributes and etc you've already decreased your chances of finding a potential partner exponentially.

But there are people who don't know how to keep a good thing when they already have it. They'd rather invest in people who treat them poorly.

I've learned to let go of those who don't invest in me despite the love, kindness, and support that I've shown them.



« Last Edit: February 07, 2023, 11:42:06 PM by Believe_N_Me »

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Offline Believe_N_Me

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #11 on: February 07, 2023, 11:44:28 PM »
Just find someone you get along well with and who loves you, that's enough.

A lot of people say that but then they'll dump or sabotage things with the peaceful one and run to the most drama-filled person.



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Offline lexicon

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #12 on: February 08, 2023, 08:26:35 AM »
But there are people who don't know how to keep a good thing when they already have it. They'd rather invest in people who treat them poorly.

I've learned to let go of those who don't invest in me despite the love, kindness, and support that I've shown them.

Live and learn. Not a very meaningful answer but succint.

I've had to tell someone I couldn't have them in my Life if we were never going to be more than just friends. Cut off straight cold turkey. I don't regret it. Sometimes that's what it takes.



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Offline DuMa

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #13 on: February 08, 2023, 01:01:57 PM »
Live and learn. Not a very meaningful answer but succint.

I've had to tell someone I couldn't have them in my Life if we were never going to be more than just friends. Cut off straight cold turkey. I don't regret it. Sometimes that's what it takes.

I don't think you even owe anyone a statement like such.  I mean moving on is just a step away.  It is not like it is a job where you have to put in your 2 weeks notice.  Even with jobs these days, you still owe them nothing.  Just leave

By telling them that you are going to cut ties is a psychological defensive move. Years later, her name is Believe_n_me and she will tell your story about the guy that wants her but she can not commit or get out of that friend zone.  However, I see the trickery in it though.  They need to hear the final touch and who knows, you guys might meet again one day and for a fairy tale story to end in happiness, lets just put the both of you as being single and this time around, he is not going to let you go.   O0




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Offline DuMa

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Re: I used to think those living in a large Hmong population...
« Reply #14 on: February 08, 2023, 01:05:57 PM »
Apparently, a lot of men don't mind older women for convenience.

When you say older women, I'm replacing it with the word matured women. 

When my dentist friend from high school graduated and had his practice in Houston, he came back home one day and he was complaining how beautiful women our age are lacking that maturity level.  Man, the way he goes off these beautiful but young women are hilarious. 

Some guys can't get a hottie while some guys are rejecting them due to their maturity level not being intact.  We have someone for everyone for our needs.   O0



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