my dad had a gf before he met my mom who passed away when he was still in laos.
He dated this girl and they planned to get marry but he was very poor cuz his dad die and his mom remarry and left him with his grandpa and took the smaller siblings with her. So he lived with his grandpa and uncles ever since the age of 12. Anyways, he told her, he's going to go out of town to make some money so he can marry her. So they promised they'll wait for each other. He went and when he got money he came back. But before going to her house or tell her he's back, he went to his uncle's house and they were joking saying someone should tell his gf that my dad got married while away but for real, my dad was gonna go take her home that nite. My dad's uncle told her my dad got married, so she got sad and ate some medicine to die. That nite, my dad went to go get her, and my dad was too late. she poison herself before he got there and died in his arm. Her parents got mad at my dad, and told him to pay for the funeral and come up with funeral clothes for her. My dad being poor, gave them money that he earned and he have no hmong clothes besides the hmong white dress that his mom got as a gift from her parents when she wedded, he gave it to her parents to dress his dead gf in it. During the funeral, her mom told him, 13days after burial, my dad will have to do a ua neej for my dad and change his name cuz she say that their hmong xiong have alot of dab. (idk how to phase that in english) So he did that and changed his name. Then his grandpa sended him to thailand refugee camp to get away from the drama and there he met my mom and married her. He didnt tell anyone about it too.
He married my mom and they live in a small house next to his uncles, but the ironic part is that his dead gf's parents live couple of units down where he lived. it wasnt even 3 days after my oldest sister was born, that his gf's mom walked past my parents house and say that she heard they had a daughter and she said to my mom where my dad was in his hmong name (not the new hmong name he change to) and my mom replied he wasnt home. The gf mom say if they can name her after her dead daughter and my mom reply sure. Right after the gf mom left, my mom look up on her roof and saw someone with long hair dangling on the roof with a hmong white dress. She got so freak out and when my dad came home she told my dad about it, and my dad finally told her the whole story about giving her my dad's mother's white dress. My mom kept seeing her around the outside of the house cuz the dead gf cant come in, and at nite, my oldest sister would cry and cry nonstop. So my mom's dad (who's a shaman) say she dont like her name, so they changed it.. But my dad's dead gf dont really haunt him cuz he never drink blood with her, so he dont see her.
