PebHmong Discussion Forum

General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: Dok_Champa on November 13, 2018, 03:05:54 PM

Title: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 13, 2018, 03:05:54 PM
Milestone #1 - Get marry
Milestone #2 - Have Children
Milestone #3 -Help the Clan (Specialized in one area of the Hmong cultures/traditions so you can be beneficial to the clan and others.  Ex:  Learn to play the qeej so you can help at funeral, learn txiv xaiv, learn something...so you can be useful except do nothing
Milestone #4-Take leadership role
Milestone #5 -How do you say this in Hmong - Ua nom ua tswv

Agree?

Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: DuMa on November 13, 2018, 05:33:55 PM
Don't know what I'm agreeing to but yeah, that
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: hmgROCK on November 13, 2018, 11:16:17 PM
#3

It’s hard trying to memorize everything
Knowing what to say
How to thank the shaman

Thank the guest at the funeral
The qeej song to sent the deceased to the after life

For our Jesus folks
How to say a prayer
What they can’t or willing to eat
Some can’t eat blood
Coming up with vows
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: hmgROCK on November 13, 2018, 11:19:39 PM
It’s hard man
Sometimes I get tongue twist

A lot of saying
And saying it right

That’s why I prefer to chop and slice meat
I posted pic on my other thread
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: ProudLao on November 14, 2018, 06:15:30 AM
So what happen when number one and two did not occurred?
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Mr_Mechanic on November 14, 2018, 06:47:21 AM
It depends on the individual.  For some, if he's happy and content with life without hitting any of those.......th at's a milestone in my book.  Again, keyword.  Happy and Content.  Everybody has his/her meaning of milestone...so it depends.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: DuMa on November 14, 2018, 07:58:57 AM
It depends on the individual.  For some, if he's happy and content with life without hitting any of those.......th at's a milestone in my book.  Again, keyword.  Happy and Content.  Everybody has his/her meaning of milestone...so it depends.

The word content is reserved for ugly people.  If you can't strive for the best then be content with what is in front of you. 

There are more ugly people in this world by default because if most of us are pretty, we don't need the modeling and beauty industry. 
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: theking on November 14, 2018, 08:16:28 AM
It depends on the individual.... so it depends.

Yep, fact is, it does "depends" for some ...

I do know that if a Hmong man doesn't hit certain things in life, he's not scrutinized as much as a Hmong woman on average..If a Hmong woman doesn't get married by a certain age, she's considered "damaged goods"...by many...sad but true...
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: theking on November 14, 2018, 08:17:41 AM
So what happen when number one and two did not occurred?

Nothing really, no real big concerns...for a Hmong man from what I've seen...
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 14, 2018, 09:06:37 AM
So what happen when number one and two did not occurred?
Then you don't move onto the other milestones... Or basically, you haven't started your milestones yet. 
Yep, fact is, it does "depends" for some ...

I do know that if a Hmong man doesn't hit certain things in life, he's not scrutinized as much as a Hmong woman on average..If a Hmong woman doesn't get married by a certain age, she's considered "damaged goods"...by many...sad but true...
"Depends"...
Nothing really, no real big concerns...for a Hmong man from what I've seen...
No concerns for Hmong men who prefers to live life w/ their in heads stuck in the sand (don't see, don't hear, don't care).

It depends on the individual.  For some, if he's happy and content with life without hitting any of those.......th at's a milestone in my book.  Again, keyword.  Happy and Content.  Everybody has his/her meaning of milestone...so it depends.
That would be true if you don't care too much for the Hmong men milestones.  But then you could be "ostracized" by the Hmong community :D :D :D for being so "un-hmonglike." 
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Reporter on November 14, 2018, 09:25:45 AM
What about those for women?

Milestone #1 - Get marry
Milestone #2 - Have Children
Milestone #3 -Help the Clan (Specialized in one area of the Hmong cultures/traditions so you can be beneficial to the clan and others.  Ex:  Learn to play the qeej so you can help at funeral, learn txiv xaiv, learn something...so you can be useful except do nothing
Milestone #4-Take leadership role
Milestone #5 -How do you say this in Hmong - Ua nom ua tswv

Agree?


Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Gucci K on November 14, 2018, 09:37:41 AM
Milestone #1 - Get marry
Milestone #2 - Have Children
Milestone #3 -Help the Clan (Specialized in one area of the Hmong cultures/traditions so you can be beneficial to the clan and others.  Ex:  Learn to play the qeej so you can help at funeral, learn txiv xaiv, learn something...so you can be useful except do nothing
Milestone #4-Take leadership role
Milestone #5 -How do you say this in Hmong - Ua nom ua tswv

Agree?
These are hardly any "milestones"...they are somewhat expected out of a hmong man, except for #5.

milestones should equate to some sort of achievement that is above the norm.

m1 - getting an educational background with a higher degree than a bachelors.
m2 - obtaining a reputable/respectable employment status.
m3 - volunteering at non-profits organizations (a board member, at the mimimum)
m4 - own properties and assets above the $.5 million mark
m5 - living debt free!!!

sadly, I haven't achieve any of the above including the expectations.. .ha!
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Mr_Mechanic on November 14, 2018, 09:50:38 AM
That would be true if you don't care too much for the Hmong men milestones.  But then you could be "ostracized" by the Hmong community :D :D :D for being so "un-hmonglike." 
I'll just leave this here.  "People who matters don't mind and people who minds don't matters." 
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: DuMa on November 14, 2018, 11:16:06 AM
Yep, fact is, it does "depends" for some ...

I do know that if a Hmong man doesn't hit certain things in life, he's not scrutinized as much as a Hmong woman on average..If a Hmong woman doesn't get married by a certain age, she's considered "damaged goods"...by many...sad but true...

Well older women makes better mental lovers.  It is like dating an older brother, they will take care of you. 

If anyone has membership to a Viet husband and wife dentistry team with a clinic in Bloomington MN, that's my friend.   At only 21, he married a 35 years old chick from Washington state who so happens to be a dentist.  Met on a Viet chat and his way out so of speak.  She also benefits cuz the guy is handsome with a square jaw.  Now he runs the front desk and she runs the back.  Took them a long time to have their first child.  After marriage, it is like he doesn't know us anymore.  It's ok, respect other people's different methology in life.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 14, 2018, 12:12:24 PM
#3

It’s hard trying to memorize everything
Knowing what to say
How to thank the shaman

Thank the guest at the funeral
The qeej song to sent the deceased to the after life

For our Jesus folks
How to say a prayer
What they can’t or willing to eat
Some can’t eat blood
Coming up with vows
Yes it's hard learning those Hmong cultural traditions, what to say and they're like a "poetic language"...even I can't do it.  Maybe in the future, they'll allow people to read from paper... I did when I had to do a lwm qaib for my nyab ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

What about those for women?

Most go for 1, 2, and 3 for sure and women help the men to achieve 1,2,3,4,5.  Also, some women will reach to 4, 5 and we call them the "trail blazers."
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: theking on November 14, 2018, 01:46:37 PM
   "Depends"...

Yep, good to see one more ph member grasping that simple fact... O0
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 14, 2018, 02:12:38 PM
Yep, good to see one more ph member grasping that simple fact... O0
Your favorite words so it's an appropriate response :D :D :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: YAX on November 14, 2018, 02:49:30 PM
i'm only at milestone 2 then.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: ProudLao on November 14, 2018, 03:28:59 PM
Then you don't move onto the other milestones... Or basically, you haven't started your milestones yet. 

I believe some men can skip one and two and even jump to five or any for that matter. Lol
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 14, 2018, 03:47:04 PM
I believe some men can skip one and two and even jump to five or any for that matter. Lol
Not in the Hmong culture and #1 is a must, critical step to the others.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 14, 2018, 03:49:48 PM
i'm only at milestone 2 then.
Yes 3 more to go... and #3..is flexible, you can specialized in something as long as it helps the clan/others   Ex:  HmongRock in chopping meat..that's a valuable asset.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: ProudLao on November 14, 2018, 03:58:31 PM
Not in the Hmong culture and #1 is a must, critical step to the others.

Don’t seem fair at all. Who comes up with these stipulations?
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: dogmai on November 14, 2018, 04:13:19 PM
Not in the Hmong culture and #1 is a must, critical step to the others.

No it's not. See.....
Yes 3 more to go... and #3..is flexible, you can specialized in something as long as it helps the clan/others   Ex:  HmongRock in chopping meat..that's a valuable asset.

HmongRock skipped to 3.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: theking on November 14, 2018, 05:30:02 PM
Don’t seem fair at all. Who comes up with these stipulations?

Some primitives.... ???
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 15, 2018, 08:34:46 AM
Don’t seem fair at all. Who comes up with these stipulations?
I think every culture wants the same thing as these stipulation and step #1 is critical because the elders want to encourage marriage...and when you get marry, have kids, you starts to have responsibility and responsibility makes a man into a leader and so on and on and on....

Some primitives.... ???
That's because you don't know and when you don't know they're "primitive" to you.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: hmgROCK on November 15, 2018, 10:31:07 AM
Think you guys
Gotta do more #3


Get out of the house and involve in your clan and family and relatives
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 15, 2018, 11:18:34 AM
No it's not. See.....
HmongRock skipped to 3.
There's limitation to #3 meaning certain responsibiliti es/help requires #1. 
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: dogmai on November 15, 2018, 11:49:50 AM
There's limitation to #3 meaning certain responsibiliti es/help requires #1.

So it's not required.
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Dok_Champa on November 15, 2018, 12:17:12 PM
So it's not required.
Chopping meat, not required.  If you want to be a meej koob, yes.  If you want to play the qeej, no.  If you want to be a txiv xaiv, yes.  Limitations like that.  But if you're married, you can do them all....no limitation. 
Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: Yebleng on November 15, 2018, 12:26:52 PM
Milestone #1 - Get marry
Milestone #2 - Have Children
BE A FATHER
Milestone #3 -Help the Clan (Specialized in one area of the Hmong cultures/traditions so you can be beneficial to the clan and others.  Ex:  Learn to play the qeej so you can help at funeral, learn txiv xaiv, learn something...so you can be useful except do nothing
BE A FATHER
Milestone #4-Take leadership role
BE A FATHER
Milestone #5 -How do you say this in Hmong - Ua nom ua tswv

Agree?

Title: Re: Milestones of Hmong Men (In The Hmong Culture)
Post by: theking on November 15, 2018, 01:49:04 PM
That's because you don't know and when you don't know they're "primitive" to you.

I do know and glad to see more and more Hmong move away from those controlling primitive patterns and progress to what's relevant for them now by exercising their personal preference rights.  O0