Messages

1

Funeral Rituals & Customs / Paternal uncle(s)’s misuse of political pressure

« on: December 10, 2023, 07:49:44 AM »

This is a vent about clan leader pressures:

At the funeral pre-game meeting, he unvolunteered him and his whole family from helping out during the funeral because all his kids were too busy, and his older kids show up late with the excuse they had a prior engagement relating to “helping” at an event with maternal side that took precedence for most of the day. All they did was drink beer, eat and sit so they can get “koob moos”. And he with maybe an x# people used their pull to hinder our progress by telling the usual local qeej helpers to decline to help (yea, we know, music guys!—I hope you do better going fwd; show some true sincerity to help instead of this political pressure business you got yourself into & tell the truth a simple no on call #1 is better than dancing around the yes over a number of calls over time with requirement checklist, unless that is the process with qeej stuff (excuse my ignorance: still new and learning)—make us jump thru hoops we successfully jump thru, so u say no). Please advise. Thanks for reading!

Be better! Stop with the excuses, please.

2

Marriage & Family Life / Family disconnect

« on: March 07, 2023, 09:56:44 AM »

During Covid emergency, family clan (striped Mong) who did qeej refused to do a funeral unless it was only one day.  We complied and they still refused. The family ended up  asking non family clan (white Mong) members to do it do to since our small town of family reps/“elders” sided with the qeej people.  Theory: It may have been that the elder(s) spoke to the qeej people to decline.  Now, everyone tends to have invite only drinking and restaurant dine in group events for bonding and family related growth and less attending small/moderate size family rituals. Less and less people are turning out-since everyone is more interested in bonding like Hmong/Mong Americans with modernized and cost-based outings. Is what is making us Hmong just eating out at restaurants/casinos/flying out to families’ places to eat and drink? Let’s do active things and work out together and not focus on eating rich food.  Let’s try healthier and sustainable foods!