Is it real love or a trauma bond?

[Believe_N_Me]

What is a trauma-bonded relationship? A trauma bond is when a person forms a deep emotional attachment with someone that causes them harm. It often develops from a repeated cycle of abuse and positive reinforcement. When this occurs between partners, this is a trauma-bonded relationship.

[Believe_N_Me]

I was listening to a Nancy Yang story awhile ago. The woman said that the reason she was so upset, she beat up the ex's new wife, is not because she was still in love with him. First of all, she doesn't feel like she was ever in love with him. They were both divorcees when they met. It's hard meeting people at this stage but they were available and liked each other enough. Anyways, she felt very "mob siab" because this guy had suffered a mini stroke, but she dated him anyways. She would use her own money to buy medicinal herbs, grew them, too, and was very invested in helping him physically heal. Especially giving him massages and all. He would take trips to Minnesota to supposedly buy medicine but he met some other divorcee - but that's not who he married. He secretly married her brother's ex-mos ab wife, whom she introduced this guy to when they took trips to Minnesota together. Not a good idea if you are a divorcee to bring your bf/gf to family events where they establish friendship, familiarity, and comfortability . You think you're a couple, but in their mind they are still single.

It's very scary out there, especially if you're an older single. A lot of older singles are very broken so they're looking to trauma bond with you. Maybe you're trying to trauma bond with them, too.

But those of you who have pure intentions, beware. Don't lose hope. Those who use you will get their karma. Plus, they are so broken that it's likely they will just repeat a cycle of unhappiness. KNOW WHO TRULY LOVES YOU AND HOLD ONTO THAT PERSON.

[Believe_N_Me]

Trauma bond with a narcissist: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xBOXuTdL1tM

The reason why you keep going back is because the abuser creates moments that fulfill your needs. Despite the fact that things have been getting worse over time, you are addicted to the short-lived moments of where your needs are being met.

[Believe_N_Me]

Real love brings a healing energy. It doesn't make you feel anxious, insecure, or confused. You are always sure about the other person's feelings and intentions. When the relationship ends, you don't feel used, deceived, or discarded.