PebHmong Discussion Forum
General Category => General Discussion => Topic started by: YAX on December 19, 2018, 10:55:01 AM
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makes their man wear Hmong outfits out in public?
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who knows....maybe the guys wanna wear it. either way, I don't k.
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makes their man wear Hmong outfits out in public?
Depends...forc ing is not good but if they do it because they want to, it's all good because some men of other race do want to participate and be apart of their wife's culture...
This also applies to men that married women of other race too...If it's not forced, it's all good...when it comes to their wives participating in their culture..
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it's a good thing..shows respect to the culture they married into! ha!
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No one forces her to wear my Viet culture ao dai outfit either.
So no, I'm not wearing it unless I need an outfit to wear cuz I just in my pants or something.
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You mean Hmong costume for HNY? My sister is married to a white guy and every year he looks forward to wearing Hmong costume. My mom dress him up every year. And my nieces who are mix, who don't even look Hmong wears their little Hmong outfit. They enjoy it.
We hear it from the girl's perspective that he enjoys it, but is he really doing it because he enjoys it or is he doing it because he loves her and just wants her to be happy? Do you think you'd feel comfortable in clothes of other cultures that's not your own?
On the other hand, I do see some older white ladies who loved to wear Hmong clothes because of the pretty colors and they wore it to the Hmong NY's happily. They're not married or dating any Hmong guys so you know they enjoy it because they don't have any other reason to wear the clothes. One just says she loves the pretty outfits and they're really into Hmong culture.
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Man...
I might end up marrying non-hmong…
No offense to hmong girls but dang! There's so many other good looking girls out there!
And if she want me to wear a dashiki, or leiderhosen, or male komono, I don't care.. it's nice to see other cultures...
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We hear it from the girl's perspective that he enjoys it, but is he really doing it because he enjoys it or is he doing it because he loves her and just wants her to be happy? Do you think you'd feel comfortable in clothes of other cultures that's not your own?
On the other hand, I do see some older white ladies who loved to wear Hmong clothes because of the pretty colors and they wore it to the Hmong NY's happily. They're not married or dating any Hmong guys so you know they enjoy it because they don't have any other reason to wear the clothes. One just says she loves the pretty outfits and they're really into Hmong culture.
Depends..those of us with a broad mindset have also heard from the man's "perspective" too...
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I haven't seen one who would force their nonHmong husbands to wear Hmong. I've seen those guys asking to wear Hmong costumes only.
And that's fine. If I was married to a Japanese lady, I'd be in Japanese costumes without any problem.
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HE REALLY ENJOYS wearing Hmong costume. My sister's like, "Do you REALLY need to wear Hmong costume this year???" And even my mom gets tired of taking out the Hmong clothes, although he lets her know ahead of time. My nieces and nephews love it because it's colorful and all the noise the coins make.
Another thing I want to point out is that if a person has no respect for their spouse's culture then they shouldn't marry them.
Yeah, but sometimes the spouse doesn't have respect for her own culture too though. lol. Cool that he enjoys it. I'm sure many guys just wear it because their wives makes them.
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I haven't seen one who would force their nonHmong husbands to wear Hmong. I've seen those guys asking to wear Hmong costumes only.
And that's fine. If I was married to a Japanese lady, I'd be in Japanese costumes without any problem.
Same here..Have family members of both genders that married out of race and their spouses actually want to participate and learn instead of being ignorant about the culture.... O0
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when i see a girl or guy with another race spouse wearing hmong clothes, first to mind is why didn't she/he married a hmong girl/guy. if you "love" the culture so much to have your spouse wear your cultural clothes, why didn't you hook up with a hmong sister/brother?
maybe the girl/guy fell in love. maybe she/he grow up despising the traditional hmong wife/husband and married outside of race. maybe he/she wasn't attractive to other hmong and ended marrying out of race.
but deep inside, i wish they could've married someone their own kind: better relate to, in-laws can depend and involve with.
but i also wish them the best. it's their life, as long as they are happy. life goes on...
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when i see a girl or guy with another race spouse wearing hmong clothes, first to mind is why didn't she/he married a hmong girl/guy. if you "love" the culture so much to have your spouse wear your cultural clothes, why didn't you hook up with a hmong sister/brother?
For the people that I know, it's personal preference...I t doesn't mean that they are not proud of their culture or can't practice it anymore if they marry out of race. They still practice their beliefs (shamanism), and participate in cultural events like the Hmong New Year and their spouses also support it...
maybe the girl/guy fell in love. maybe she/he grow up despising the traditional hmong wife/husband and married outside of race. maybe he/she wasn't attractive to other hmong and ended marrying out of race.
Those factors could be part of it too for some...
but deep inside, i wish they could've married someone their own kind: better relate to, in-laws can depend and involve with.
Perhaps it may apply to some but from what I've seen, they are happy with their preference and they don't look at the race but the individual whether good or bad things happen down the road.
As far as "better relate to, in-laws can depend and involve with" point goes, that depends on the individual because I've seen good, bad and ugly with same race and mixed race marriages when it comes to those things...My family and relatives' non-Hmong in-laws are just as supportive as the Hmong ones if not more...over the years during family functions or when a family member just needs help for what ever reasons...
So just because they are Hmong in-laws, doesn't mean you can depend on them and just because they are non-Hmong in-laws, doesn't mean you can't depend on them....Or vice-versa...
but i also wish them the best. it's their life, as long as they are happy. life goes on...
Yep, agree....their life, their preference.... on how they want to live it...
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Just trying to make herself look good as if her man cares about her heritage.
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wasn’t expecting detailed follow-up opinions to my opinion, but all is with good intention.
when i say “relate to” i meant it’s easier and inviting for hmong inlaws to relate/involve a hmong son/daughter in law at hmong gathering. “tuaj los vauv, los zaum pem no” or “nyab los pab peb ua hauj lwm.” it’s easier to “txib/instruct” bc they can relate to you and they expect a traditional response from you. whereas, another race spouse the hmong family feels awkward to say anything. there is no cultural expectation and that is what i mean by “relate to.”
on the matter of “i hmong sister married to hmong man and they have drama” that’s is a “stupid” couple who can’t get along issue, a human issue than cultural issue. it’s like saying i know 100 elderly hmong couples who married in laos at age 15 who are celebrating 60 yrs anniversary, but why a white couple in their first year is divorced.” or why the high husband/wife murder rate in the hmong community, but you don’t hear of the white.
not getting along is between the couples, not the culture.
back to the op’s question, “what do you think when you see...” and i see the young generation growing up despising our culture, then growing up to realizing our parents sacrifice. growing up, we wanted white names, like james, jenny, christine, tom. and now that we have kids, our kids are named timothy “muajkoob”yang. can’t seem to run away from the culture. ah, the irony, same irony as your white spouse dressing in hmong clothes at the hmong new year. ;)
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We hear it from the girl's perspective that he enjoys it, but is he really doing it because he enjoys it or is he doing it because he loves her and just wants her to be happy? Do you think you'd feel comfortable in clothes of other cultures that's not your own?
On the other hand, I do see some older white ladies who loved to wear Hmong clothes because of the pretty colors and they wore it to the Hmong NY's happily. They're not married or dating any Hmong guys so you know they enjoy it because they don't have any other reason to wear the clothes. One just says she loves the pretty outfits and they're really into Hmong culture.
I concur with you in some of the reasons here on why people would wear Hmong clothes. Most other ethnicities would do it for their significant other because they care about that person.......u nless they were interested in the culture originally, which in most cases aren’t/weren’t.