Messages

1

Hmong Culture & History / Re: Vauvs and nyabs are not servants..

« on: February 06, 2022, 10:45:37 PM »

Let them know how you feel and be honest about it and then go from there...

Been complaining to the wife about it. Hope she sticks up for me.. If she doesn't, things may not go so well for us. I married her. Not to be her parents' servant. Trust me. It's that bad. I'm not a lazy vauv. It's just overwhelming to the point where it has ruined my normal life. I always hear about the nyab going through this, but never the vauv. I guess I am going through it..

2

Hmong Culture & History / Re: Vauvs and nyabs are not servants..

« on: February 06, 2022, 10:42:15 PM »

You have no choice even if you don't visit them. When they have a ceremony or just something heavy to haul or if they just want to see you after a short while, they'll call  you and make you do things for them.

I'm serious.

Gonna have to just not go as often then. They have other sons and daughters who can do some of it too.  OG's are so selfish. They think they should come first all the time..

3

Hmong Culture & History / Re: Vauvs and nyabs are not servants..

« on: February 06, 2022, 10:40:05 PM »

That's what you get when you married one of their daughters. Her parents' mindset are like that. lol

That's a very bad mindset because if the wife doesn't stick up for me, this servant stuff will eventually ruin our marriage. I have a life.  Lending a helping hand is different from being treated like a servant.  i work 40+ hrs/week and I have hobbies and other errands I need to do. Why do I always have to give up those to finish theirs. Just not fair esp when there are other helping hands too.

4

General Discussion / Re: Man, it's hard to click with people with no common interests...

« on: February 04, 2022, 11:07:43 PM »

No issues here because I tell it like it is...when in situations like that.

You have the right to do what makes you happy regardless of others' opinions...

yeah, but about to hurt some people's feelings for sure. it's like.. "why the F do I wanna waste my time with you guys if all you do is drink and drink...". Can't do anything with them that doesn't include excessive drinking.  Like.. Can we just go to the bowling alley and bowl and not get drunk? losers

5

Hmong Culture & History / Vauvs and nyabs are not servants..

« on: February 04, 2022, 11:04:15 PM »

It's not that I don't want to help out my inlaws, but man, I get so damn tired of doing almost everything for them. It's like whenever I pay them a visit, they have a list of errands (hours) for me to do for them. they have sons and daughters at home who can do some at least. And it's not like my inlaws are disabled. They are still healthy and able to do things, but why do I have to be their servant?  They were doing just fine before I became their vauv.

so annoying. It's like I don't have a life or something. I simply refused to go visit them unless a special occasion comes up.

6

General Discussion / Man, it's hard to click with people with no common interests...

« on: February 04, 2022, 10:58:52 PM »

Wife thinks I am a hater because I refused to hang out with her bros and bro-in-laws. Tried it a few times and all they did was drank till they're drunk. It's like drinking is a hobby for them or something. Her bros and bro in laws most likely think I am a hater too since I almost never accept their invites to hang out.

anyone having this issue?