PebHmong Discussion Forum

General Category => Hmong Culture & History => Funeral Rituals & Customs => Topic started by: Devilhimself3312 on November 13, 2009, 10:53:14 AM

Title: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Devilhimself3312 on November 13, 2009, 10:53:14 AM
Ok....for you americanized kids, do you know what you need to do at a funeral when it's your family that passed away?  I see too many of young bucks/gals at funeral just sitting on their arse looking all lost.  How dare you.  Ok ok, you show your face and you think that's enough.  When you are asked to wake up like 2:00-3:00 in the morning to go slaughter pigs/cows/chickens, you're like, "I don't know how".  Times like this, you're useless to me. >:D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: blablablablabla on November 13, 2009, 10:54:31 AM
agreed with you on that!  What they need to be doing is helping the elders, asking whats needed help and what not instead of sitting on their asses! 
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: kahdung on November 13, 2009, 11:03:03 AM
sorry homies.. we don't need to stay up until 3 or 4 in the morning.  :D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: blablablablabla on November 13, 2009, 11:12:05 AM
sorry homies.. we don't need to stay up until 3 or 4 in the morning.  :D

we dont' but the elders do......its still tradition if needed.  Go to church than you don't need to stay past midnight. 
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Devilhimself3312 on November 13, 2009, 11:13:49 AM
sorry homies.. we don't need to stay up until 3 or 4 in the morning.  :D

Sorry homie, you need to do what you need to do when the time comes.  It's call growing up. >:D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: primetime on November 13, 2009, 11:15:50 AM
I don't know the rules, but I know how to help and listen.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: kahdung on November 13, 2009, 11:16:16 AM
we dont' but the elders do......its still tradition if needed.  Go to church than you don't need to stay past midnight.  

That's what i'm saying.. I do goto church so we don't need to do that.  8)
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Kashia on November 13, 2009, 11:17:32 AM
Yeah I go to church too so I don't need to worry about slaugthering animals!! or staying up till midnight...... ...  :)
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: blablablablabla on November 13, 2009, 11:24:13 AM
Yeah I go to church too so I don't need to worry about slaugthering animals!! or staying up till midnight...... ...  :)

you'll still slaughter animals....chu rch or no church!   :)
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Devilhimself3312 on November 13, 2009, 11:27:28 AM
I don't know the rules, but I know how to help and listen.
That's all it takes at times.  Listen and help.  Fromt that, you'll eventually learn.  I'm talking about the ones who just sits there and act like it's the shiet to do when everyone around them is doing this and that. >:D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Kashia on November 13, 2009, 11:31:20 AM
you'll still slaughter animals....chu rch or no church!   :)

I'm sure we do....

But the elders usually takes care of it......
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Devilhimself3312 on November 13, 2009, 11:32:21 AM
I'm sure we do....

But the elders usually takes care of it......

What's your part?  The sitting around?  As a lady, you'll atleast still have to pass the drinks/fruits around.  Do something. >:D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: ALPHAFEMALE on November 13, 2009, 11:34:37 AM
I usually try to help when the deceased is a close family member...chop up foods, run errands, or pass out food/drinks..but if there's already too many ppl in the kitchen or there's not anything to do at the moment, I may just sit around or socialize. But I've never gone to a funeral of a close family member and not assist at all the entire time.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: DeceiversChick on November 13, 2009, 11:39:00 AM
depends how close i am to the dec'd. If it's immediate family, I know better to serve drinks, acknowledge all family and friends who attend, and socialize with everyone.

If it's a distant relative.. i show up and give my condolences, stay for a few hours and come back the next day again.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Kashia on November 13, 2009, 11:39:24 AM
What's your part?  The sitting around?  As a lady, you'll atleast still have to pass the drinks/fruits around.  Do something. >:D

I show up... say hi to all the elder people that I may know...

Ask my mother is there anything to do........ its my mothers call......

I only sit around when its not necessary of me to go up and serve people...
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: unknownladiee on November 13, 2009, 12:09:39 PM
we have to stay up all night on the second day without sleeping....an d that was tough....
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: ALPHAFEMALE on November 13, 2009, 12:13:46 PM
we have to stay up all night on the second day without sleeping....an d that was tough....

The last night is the worst..when you have to do all that bowing for 6-7 hours.   ::) :( ;D ;D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: unknownladiee on November 13, 2009, 12:14:57 PM
The last night is the worst..when you have to do all that bowing for 6-7 hours.   ::) :( ;D ;D
YUPP...BUT I KINDA MISS THAT THOUGH...EVER SINCE I MOVE HERE....
THE FUNERALS DOESN'T DO THAT AND HMONG PEOPLE DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT...
KINDA SUCKS....
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: ALPHAFEMALE on November 13, 2009, 12:18:05 PM
YUPP...BUT I KINDA MISS THAT THOUGH...EVER SINCE I MOVE HERE....
THE FUNERALS DOESN'T DO THAT AND HMONG PEOPLE DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT...
KINDA SUCKS....

Where do you live now?
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: koDak_moments on November 13, 2009, 12:18:26 PM
Yeah I go to church too so I don't need to worry about slaugthering animals!! or staying up till midnight...... ...  :)

but you still have to give up 10% of your income to the fake jesus. LMAO.  Its either one, you choose.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: GaPpiE on November 13, 2009, 12:21:33 PM
Yeah I go to church too so I don't need to worry about slaugthering animals!! or staying up till midnight...... ...  :)

nyab mcdonald?? haha jk kashia :)

but seriously... the future of the hmong in america rests upon those we term "MTT"
nes tseem tsis tau paub xwb os.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: unknownladiee on November 13, 2009, 12:22:49 PM
Yeah I go to church too so I don't need to worry about slaugthering animals!! or staying up till midnight...... ...  :)
i thought you do slaughter animals.... ? people that goes to church that i know does....
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Kashia on November 13, 2009, 12:23:03 PM
but you still have to give up 10% of your income to the fake jesus. LMAO.  Its either one, you choose.

Hey lay off my religion!

thanks!  :)

nyab mcdonald?? haha jk kashia :)

but seriously... the future of the hmong in america rests upon those we term "MTT"
nes tseem tsis tau paub xwb os.

No worries I do know my MTT role too
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: IamYeXi on November 13, 2009, 12:26:26 PM
its easier if you offer to help then being ask to help. 
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: GaPpiE on November 13, 2009, 12:28:09 PM
you have to kill cows and tie it to the person whos passed to take with them and the family is to "SHAW" for good luck and fortune. and the sons, husbands are to "OUA CHAO" to families that donate. and everything has to happen in order or else it can go very wrong. you may not know but theres always someone watching to make sure that all the occurances happpen in EXACT order for the person to RIP.
this is why i say and believe that poj niam hmoob have to respect her husband because... with this concerning funerals and hmong shrines in house, poj niam ua tsis tau.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Gatorade_Guy on November 13, 2009, 12:34:20 PM
all i know is, where's the beef?
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Kuv-Yog-Mekas on November 13, 2009, 12:37:31 PM
That's what i'm saying.. I do goto church so we don't need to do that.  8)

 ;D

 8)
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: mz_rockenit on November 13, 2009, 12:41:22 PM
you'll still slaughter animals....chu rch or no church!   :)

Agreeed. I'm a Christian and I get irritated when I hear other Christians making excuses because they go to church!  :angry4:
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: ALPHAFEMALE on November 13, 2009, 12:42:44 PM
you have to kill cows and tie it to the person whos passed to take with them and the family is to "SHAW" for good luck and fortune. and the sons, husbands are to "OUA CHAO" to families that donate. and everything has to happen in order or else it can go very wrong. you may not know but theres always someone watching to make sure that all the occurances happpen in EXACT order for the person to RIP.
this is why i say and believe that poj niam hmoob have to respect her husband because... with this concerning funerals and hmong shrines in house, poj niam ua tsis tau.

I think you are mistaken. I see more Hmong women participating in the Hmong funerals and doing what they are supposed to do than the men.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Kuv-Yog-Mekas on November 13, 2009, 12:44:57 PM
but you still have to give up 10% of your income to the fake jesus. LMAO.  Its either one, you choose.

don't you have to give 10% of your income to those who come do jingle bell at your place too?that's what i thought. 8)
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: LadyThao on November 13, 2009, 02:16:16 PM
that's why you get your whiney ass and their lazy ass and do something together!!!!! duh!


like i always say, if you didn't say shit then you can't say shit now!
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: fiery on November 13, 2009, 02:23:03 PM
Look, it's not like the kid has been to that many funerals. They're kids. It's probably their first one. If they're just standing there, make them useful. Most kids dont hesitate to help out of an elder asks them to help. They stand there because they dont know what to do. It's your duty as the older person to show/tell them. Isnt that how traditions are passed on?

 ::)

Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: GaPpiE on November 13, 2009, 03:29:27 PM
I think you are mistaken. I see more Hmong women participating in the Hmong funerals and doing what they are supposed to do than the men.
i didn't say that women don't participate, yes they help and we're all so thankful. i'm simply implying that hmong woman cannot do the mans job when it comes to funeral ceremonies. and if they can, then i'd like to see.
and if ya'll think funerals are just about eating and seeing people then you're sadly mistaken. there's a far deeper purpose.
when you're brought into this world your spirit is called and when you leave your spirit must be sent back.
theres a great book on this subject matter, i forgot the name. but... ask one of your clan fathers. you'll be amazed what they know and what you've to learn. what we all have to learn.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Bob_J.D. on November 14, 2009, 09:15:38 AM
If you don't like the younger kids standing around, then get the HNIC to assign them jobs.  There are usually two HNIC around.

I seriously believe the Hmong funeral is going to be a dying tradition especially after a few more generation.  I'm not here arguing the good or bad, just my opinion. 

bob
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Vangpao on November 14, 2009, 10:44:20 AM
Ok....for you americanized kids, do you know what you need to do at a funeral when it's your family that passed away?  I see too many of young bucks/gals at funeral just sitting on their arse looking all lost.  How dare you.  Ok ok, you show your face and you think that's enough.  When you are asked to wake up like 2:00-3:00 in the morning to go slaughter pigs/cows/chickens, you're like, "I don't know how".  Times like this, you're useless to me. >:D

I bought the animal-You can chop it up as I "...show [my] face...[and am]...sitting on [my] arse...". Fair trade?

Now get back to chopping you ungrateful Hmong. And chop with a smile knowing that you're leaving with a full gut due to some else's contribution.

Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Devilhimself3312 on November 14, 2009, 08:01:49 PM
Look, it's not like the kid has been to that many funerals. They're kids. It's probably their first one. If they're just standing there, make them useful. Most kids dont hesitate to help out of an elder asks them to help. They stand there because they dont know what to do. It's your duty as the older person to show/tell them. Isnt that how traditions are passed on?

 ::)



Ok lady, you're getting off the subject here.  I'm not talking about actual kids here.  I'm talking about a grown woman such as yourself who is there and has no clue on what to do.  You're trying to stray off the subject here.   >:D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Devilhimself3312 on November 14, 2009, 08:07:58 PM
Looks like the host of this thread just got kicked...and kicked rather hard.  Wanna free lunch?  Now ya got one.  I must agree, start choppin'. 

 ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

You're time will come when your mom or dad passed and you'll think back on this thread and wonder why you didn't just take some minor advice(s) from this host of this thread.  Remember, your time will come.  By then, I'll be smiling and choppin that meat you supposedly bought for the better good of your life as a respect for them bringing you into this life.  Than you can sit there and still smile and make jokes about it.  Ok young homie....lol. >:D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Devilhimself3312 on November 14, 2009, 08:12:21 PM
I bought the animal-You can chop it up as I "...show [my] face...[and am]...sitting on [my] arse...". Fair trade?

Now get back to chopping you ungrateful Hmong. And chop with a smile knowing that you're leaving with a full gut due to some else's contribution.


Yeah, sounds like a fair trade.  Like I said, kids who think like you, their time will come when it's their own mommy or daddy who goes.  Then, I'll be more than happy to chop that meat just for you.  I'll make sure I prepare a meal for you and you can sit there just to show your face ok.  Remember to smile as well during than.  Don't worry, your time will come and who knows, this simple thread will come back to kick you in your sitting go happy a.ss.....lol.  Get it?  Got it?  Good!!! >:D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: yamaha on November 14, 2009, 09:25:57 PM
don't you have to give 10% of your income to those who come do jingle bell at your place too?that's what i thought. 8)

failed! they dont have to give 10% of their income to those who come do jingle bell at their place.never..i f you did you just got hustle! and it's not all the time probably once a year minimum....not like hmong mus church..10% monthly...how sad..you know how much you can do with that 10%! a lot..

let see...you make 2000k you put 200 hundred in each month ..200 times 12 equals 2400 yearly wow!! $2400 omg! that's a good 60 something inch flat screen tv! or a used car possibly!
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: femme fatale on November 14, 2009, 09:47:18 PM
Define the age of these kids you are talking about. :P

I help out if it's close family, otherwise if I'm a guest then I'm a guest. 

Note: Aside from those that are already delegated in the kitchen....the men take care of the slaughtering, prepping the meat, and the women take care of the cooking, setting the table, drinks, dishes, cleaning..etc.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: LeLe on November 14, 2009, 10:25:59 PM
Usually when it's your immediate family, you aren't supposed to do anything.  Whether it's traditional or christian funeral, you still go and kill cows.  I don't really go to funerals unless it's someone I know personally.  The only funeral I did help was my great grandmother's funeral and that was because it was my family's turn to cook.  I didn't do anything at my grandparents or my sister's funeral, we were sent away by the people who were assigned to cook at my grandparents funerals.  And at my sister's funeral, we had a lot of American people from church at the house and we were busy comforting eachother.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: ThePhatSista on November 14, 2009, 10:37:21 PM
For the girls they make us pass out refreshments to the guests. And if it's an immediate family member that passed away, like a granparent, parent, uncle, etc, then the offsprings also have to go "xyom". It's only if it's one of those 3 day long traditional hmong funerals.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: THE DIVINE CONDOR on November 15, 2009, 08:05:03 AM
A l l  I  d o  a t  f u n e r a l s  i s  s i t  a r o u n d ,  l i s t e n  t o  m y  i P O D ,  a n d   g e t   l o s t  i n  a w o r l d  o f  m u s i c .
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Vangpao on November 15, 2009, 10:38:36 AM
Yeah, sounds like a fair trade.  Like I said, kids who think like you, their time will come when it's their own mommy or daddy who goes.  Then, I'll be more than happy to chop that meat just for you.  I'll make sure I prepare a meal for you and you can sit there just to show your face ok.  Remember to smile as well during than.  Don't worry, your time will come and who knows, this simple thread will come back to kick you in your sitting go happy a.ss.....lol.  Get it?  Got it?  Good!!! >:D

Quit your bit-ching and get back to chopping. If that's the only thing you can contribute to the common wealth-Great.

As for me "...smiling...", don't worry, I will.
I'll also have a piñata filled with cash and that'll turn the funeral into a fiesta.

This thread isn't going to "...kick..." me-But it's kicked you I see.

I take it you never thought about others and their contributions either. You just wanted to get a free meal and now you're upset that you had to work for it. After all you didn't do it out of love for the deceased, just some notion that you respected them and not out of genuine love and empathy. So then you'll try to rectify the situation with a flash of your Hmong knife and a tree trunk chopping block.

The best part about this whole complaint of yours is this, you do this labour so that you can hold the competed task over your peer's heads like it was some special goal to attain. Face it Devil, you're trying to portray this Hmong Funeral Food Preparation Issue the same way Huckleberry Finn portrayed the white-washing of the fence. This isn't a call to Hmong Funeral Duty, it's you bit-ching about how you were stuck doing the task and how much you dispise it. 

Did you "get it"? Have you "got it"? Good?
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: fiery on November 16, 2009, 10:35:59 AM
Ok lady, you're getting off the subject here.  I'm not talking about actual kids here.  I'm talking about a grown woman such as yourself who is there and has no clue on what to do.  You're trying to stray off the subject here.   >:D

I wasn't at all straying. Maybe you shouldn't use the terms 'kids' when you mean full grown adults.

 ::)
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: NceegVaj on November 17, 2009, 08:37:34 AM
Ok....for you americanized kids, do you know what you need to do at a funeral when it's your family that passed away?  I see too many of young bucks/gals at funeral just sitting on their arse looking all lost.  How dare you.  Ok ok, you show your face and you think that's enough.  When you are asked to wake up like 2:00-3:00 in the morning to go slaughter pigs/cows/chickens, you're like, "I don't know how".  Times like this, you're useless to me. >:D

It's the fa.wking old men's fault ma-en...suppose to kick back and be sad not pretending you have no relatives.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: NceegVaj on November 17, 2009, 08:39:02 AM
For the girls they make us pass out refreshments to the guests. And if it's an immediate family member that passed away, like a granparent, parent, uncle, etc, then the offsprings also have to go "xyom". It's only if it's one of those 3 day long traditional hmong funerals.

I check out the girls' butt as they pass by...hehehea.. .lol
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: slude on December 04, 2009, 03:12:18 PM
if a family member or clan member passed. you as the 'xyom cuab' your role is to run errands & thank people.

xyom cuab, this is what you say:

ua tsaug no laus mog,
luag tias, yeeb vim peb tsev xyom cuab,
tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev puas tsev ntsoog
ttog ib teeg, tu ib sawv
los koj tsis cia li, koj tseem xav neej xav tsav,
xav ntsuab xav ze,
koj tseem cab yag cab nco, tshaj ntuj qa nco nto
tuaj pab peb tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

hnub qab nram lub ntsis,
peb tsev xyom cuab txawj ua lub neej ces yuav pauj tau koj tus txiaj tus ntsig no lau
nram qab nram ntsis tsev xyom cuab tsis txawj ua lub neej los,
koj tus txhia ntsha yuav nqa txhia ntsig yuav ris no laus mog.


if you are visting and contibuting money, this is what you say:

txhob ua tsaug laus mog
luag tias, yeeb vim nej tsev xyom cuab, tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev ploj tsev tuag
ntog ib teeg, qaib ib nkog
nyob li txawj ua lub neej ces twb cab yag cab nco nyiaj txiag qas ncos nto
tuaj pab nej tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

yeeb vim, ua lub neej tsis xws luag
muab yam tsis tsheej yam, muab tsi tsis tsheej tsi
twb nqa tsis tau ib yam dab tsi tuaj tauv tsev xyom cuab lub kua muag
no ces txhob ua tsaug, nkim lo tsaug xwb no laus mog

observe. participate. you must be willing to join in and not just sit/stand around. no one is going to judge you or put a microphone and ask you to speak up. overtime, you build confidence and the 'thank you' words will come naturally.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: yamaha on December 04, 2009, 03:41:32 PM
if a family member or clan member passed. you as the 'xyom cuab' your role is to run errands & thank people.

xyom cuab, this is what you say:

ua tsaug no laus mog,
luag tias, yeeb vim peb tsev xyom cuab,
tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev puas tsev ntsoog
ttog ib teeg, tu ib sawv
los koj tsis cia li, koj tseem xav neej xav tsav,
xav ntsuab xav ze,
koj tseem cab yag cab nco, tshaj ntuj qa nco nto
tuaj pab peb tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

hnub qab nram lub ntsis,
peb tsev xyom cuab txawj ua lub neej ces yuav pauj tau koj tus txiaj tus ntsig no lau
nram qab nram ntsis tsev xyom cuab tsis txawj ua lub neej los,
koj tus txhia ntsha yuav nqa txhia ntsig yuav ris no laus mog.


if you are visting and contibuting money, this is what you say:

txhob ua tsaug laus mog
luag tias, yeeb vim nej tsev xyom cuab, tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev ploj tsev tuag
ntog ib teeg, qaib ib nkog
nyob li txawj ua lub neej ces twb cab yag cab nco nyiaj txiag qas ncos nto
tuaj pab nej tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

yeeb vim, ua lub neej tsis xws luag
muab yam tsis tsheej yam, muab tsi tsis tsheej tsi
twb nqa tsis tau ib yam dab tsi tuaj tauv tsev xyom cuab lub kua muag
no ces txhob ua tsaug, nkim lo tsaug xwb no laus mog

observe. participate. you must be willing to join in and not just sit/stand around. no one is going to judge you or put a microphone and ask you to speak up. overtime, you build confidence and the 'thank you' words will come naturally.

true...couple times i did it..oh golly i was nervous but then after a couple of times it just come naturally..
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Anji88 on February 06, 2010, 09:35:48 AM
I don't do much since I don't go to funeral. I only go if they're like close family. 
I usually hand out water napkins and set the table.  The men usually slaughter the animals and cut them.. That's how my families been doing it.. even for weddings. and the women cooks it.  the teenagers just sits there until needed.
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: tengri_gim on February 07, 2010, 09:18:06 PM
Ok....for you americanized kids, do you know what you need to do at a funeral when it's your family that passed away?  I see too many of young bucks/gals at funeral just sitting on their arse looking all lost.  How dare you.  Ok ok, you show your face and you think that's enough.  When you are asked to wake up like 2:00-3:00 in the morning to go slaughter pigs/cows/chickens, you're like, "I don't know how".  Times like this, you're useless to me. >:D

They are just there to eat.

Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: canibus_man on February 09, 2010, 02:07:32 PM
we have parties at our funerals  ;D seriously, the elders drink there a$$es off. and gamble at the funeral homes and at the decease's house for at least 3 freakin days right. god i love being HMOOB!!!!party when we are alive and party when we die  ;D
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Someone on April 01, 2010, 04:58:47 PM

  I remember when my grandpa pass away.  My two auntie married two church guy.  Instead of going around and helping out.  They and their husband just sat there.  If you a church person marry a non-church person just remember you have responsibility!  Don't give me that I go to church so I don't have to do anything crap. 

  This is your family, you are there to greet, welcome, serve, and guard the body.  You are the first one there and the Last to leave.

  Hey, I use to go to church. I married a non-christian.  I decided to go back to my roots and tradition.  I hear people from both side not wanting to learn anything.

  For those who say it will die,  I'm sure our parent and parent's parent said the same thing.  But look at where we are now.


Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: Lady_Fallin on April 13, 2010, 11:17:11 AM
*yawns

I find that elders often find Americanized kids to "get in the way," and usually shoo them away in a "tsk tsk tsk" tone instead of teaching.

 8)

This reminds me of the chicken or the egg. Who's fault is it if the child was never taught?  

Last point: the last funeral I went to, the elders were drunk, playing card games, while the decease's family was beginning them to calm down, stop playing games, and help out.

Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: NceegVaj on April 16, 2010, 10:25:07 AM
Ok....for you americanized kids, do you know what you need to do at a funeral when it's your family that passed away?  I see too many of young bucks/gals at funeral just sitting on their arse looking all lost.  How dare you.  Ok ok, you show your face and you think that's enough.  When you are asked to wake up like 2:00-3:00 in the morning to go slaughter pigs/cows/chickens, you're like, "I don't know how".  Times like this, you're useless to me. >:D

What a dumb kid you are!!  When the person that DIED is your immediate family, you are suppose to do NOTHING!! Ruam tiag xwb os...mus nug tej laus meb?  Yog li kuv hais tiag...luag tias niam txiv tuag ces vaj tsev ntuag mos.

Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: TusHluasSiabZoo on April 16, 2010, 01:04:55 PM
Some experience people are in here but some inexperience people also need to learn it is simple thing to do  :'(
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: ground_zero on May 05, 2010, 06:02:57 PM
damn, i'm good... still remember my pw after all!

oh about the funeral thingy... i personally think it's little to long. cut down everything in half with the english version brief n short just for the offspring to understood would be awesome!

the hmong funeral is sending a mix signal of sad and happy... i'll bet it's confusing for the outsider, dont u all think?
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: kali_gal on May 27, 2010, 01:58:52 PM
if a family member or clan member passed. you as the 'xyom cuab' your role is to run errands & thank people.

xyom cuab, this is what you say:

ua tsaug no laus mog,
luag tias, yeeb vim peb tsev xyom cuab,
tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev puas tsev ntsoog
ttog ib teeg, tu ib sawv
los koj tsis cia li, koj tseem xav neej xav tsav,
xav ntsuab xav ze,
koj tseem cab yag cab nco, tshaj ntuj qa nco nto
tuaj pab peb tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

hnub qab nram lub ntsis,
peb tsev xyom cuab txawj ua lub neej ces yuav pauj tau koj tus txiaj tus ntsig no lau
nram qab nram ntsis tsev xyom cuab tsis txawj ua lub neej los,
koj tus txhia ntsha yuav nqa txhia ntsig yuav ris no laus mog.


if you are visting and contibuting money, this is what you say:

txhob ua tsaug laus mog
luag tias, yeeb vim nej tsev xyom cuab, tsev mob tsev nkeeg, tsev ploj tsev tuag
ntog ib teeg, qaib ib nkog
nyob li txawj ua lub neej ces twb cab yag cab nco nyiaj txiag qas ncos nto
tuaj pab nej tsev xyom cuab nta dab nta qhua kom ntseg log puas tam ncej txawb

yeeb vim, ua lub neej tsis xws luag
muab yam tsis tsheej yam, muab tsi tsis tsheej tsi
twb nqa tsis tau ib yam dab tsi tuaj tauv tsev xyom cuab lub kua muag
no ces txhob ua tsaug, nkim lo tsaug xwb no laus mog

observe. participate. you must be willing to join in and not just sit/stand around. no one is going to judge you or put a microphone and ask you to speak up. overtime, you build confidence and the 'thank you' words will come naturally.

Thanks!  I'll print this out for the young adults!!!
Title: Re: Ok..another one. At funerals....
Post by: ToxicCum on May 27, 2010, 02:58:05 PM
shhheeesh....i m usually drinking....