PebHmong Discussion Forum

Creative Corner => Jokes & Riddles => Topic started by: tRouBLe on June 27, 2014, 01:04:27 PM

Title: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 27, 2014, 01:04:27 PM
Boy: "I love you so much, I could never live without you."
Girl: "Is that you or the beer talking?"
Boy: "It's me talking to the beer." 

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 27, 2014, 01:05:44 PM
Alcohol doesn't make you fat.....it makes you lean......on tables, chairs, and random people.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 27, 2014, 01:07:19 PM
Q: Why did Mexicans create tequila?
A: So ugly people would have a chance at having sex! 

 :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: J-a-s-o-n on June 27, 2014, 01:21:56 PM
Alcohol doesn't make you fat.....it makes you lean......on tables, chairs, and random people.    ;D

Y'all know that all too well.  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 29, 2014, 04:35:47 PM
Y'all know that all too well.  :2funny:

Humph.    :knuppel2:   What if it doesn't make us lean........bu t instead sit.....or stumble......o r fall.  Hehehe.    ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 29, 2014, 04:39:42 PM
Pick-up line comebacks  ;D :

Man – Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
Woman – Yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.

Man – Can I buy you a drink?
Woman – I think I’d rather have the money.

Man –  Is this seat empty?
Woman –  Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

Man –  So what do you do for a living?
Woman –  I’m a female impersonator.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 29, 2014, 04:41:07 PM
Personal Ad found in Newspaper:

I am a sensitive man whom you can open your heart to, share your innermost thought and deepest secrets. Confide in me. I’ll understand your insecurities. No fatties, please. POB 86.

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Reporter on July 01, 2014, 01:12:58 PM
Alcohol doesn't make you fat.....it makes you lean......on tables, chairs, and random people.    ;D

I like this one.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Reporter on July 01, 2014, 01:15:08 PM
Pick-up line comebacks  ;D :

Man – Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
Woman – Yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.

Man – Can I buy you a drink?
Woman – I think I’d rather have the money.

Man –  Is this seat empty?
Woman –  Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

Man –  So what do you do for a living?
Woman –  I’m a female impersonator.

When I first got on the internet some years ago, I ran into a girl's website. One of the pickup lines she kept there was this:

Man--Your place or mine?
Woman--You go to yours; I go to mine.

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 01, 2014, 07:50:46 PM
I like this one.

And it's totally true too.   :2funny:

When I first got on the internet some years ago, I ran into girl's website. One of the pickup lines she kept there was this:

Man--Your place or mine?
Woman--You go to yours; I go to mine.

 ;D ;D

Funny.  Hehehe.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 09, 2014, 10:18:26 AM
Eight Things I Know About You:

1.  You are reading this.
2.  You are human.
3.  You can’t say the letter ”P” without separating your lips.
4.  You just attempted to do it.
6.  You are laughing at yourself.
7.  You have a smile on your face and you skipped No. 5.
8.  You just checked to see if there is a No. 5.

Ok, that was really seven things I know about you.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: J-a-s-o-n on July 09, 2014, 10:41:00 AM
Humph.    :knuppel2:   What if it doesn't make us lean........bu t instead sit.....or stumble......o r fall.  Hehehe.    ;D    :D

Also, angry, happy, and cry.  All back to back.   :2funny: :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 09, 2014, 05:41:03 PM
Also, angry, happy, and cry.  All back to back.   :2funny: :P

That's applicable to everyone, not just us.  Hehehe.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Reporter on July 10, 2014, 08:22:47 PM
Eight Things I Know About You:

1.  You are reading this.
2.  You are human.
3.  You can’t say the letter ”P” without separating your lips.
4.  You just attempted to do it.
6.  You are laughing at yourself.
7.  You have a smile on your face and you skipped No. 5.
8.  You just checked to see if there is a No. 5.

Ok, that was really seven things I know about you.   ;D

I didn't laugh until after I've read No. 8.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: J-a-s-o-n on July 10, 2014, 09:09:31 PM
That's applicable to everyone, not just us.  Hehehe.   ;D

But more suitable for y'all two.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 14, 2014, 08:28:05 AM
I didn't laugh until after I've read No. 8.

I don't care when, at least I got a laugh out of you.    ;D

But more suitable for y'all two.  ;D

I bet that's happened to you too.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: J-a-s-o-n on July 14, 2014, 09:58:06 AM
Nope, I've been told that I'm a happy drunk and I should get wasted more often.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 14, 2014, 10:45:57 AM
No proof, no care.  Hehehe.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: J-a-s-o-n on July 14, 2014, 12:09:15 PM
There is but I'm not sharing.   :P ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 17, 2014, 02:00:52 PM
You mean to tell me there's a video?   :o    Hehehe.    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 17, 2014, 07:44:47 PM
Funny.  ;D

Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 18, 2014, 10:58:00 AM
There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.

After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, “Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?”

The third fellow says, “I’ll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees.”

The first two guys were amazed. “What happened then?” they asked. “She said, ‘get out from under the bed and fight like a man’.”

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: lilly on July 18, 2014, 12:19:57 PM
There were three guys talking in the pub. Two of them are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives, while the third remains quiet.

After a while one of the first two turns to the third and says, “Well, what about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife?”

The third fellow says, “I’ll tell you. Just the other night my wife came to me on her hands and knees.”

The first two guys were amazed. “What happened then?” they asked. “She said, ‘get out from under the bed and fight like a man’.”

 ;D

 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 18, 2014, 08:49:04 PM
Funny.  ;D

Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."

LOL  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: ncokoj08 on August 19, 2014, 03:59:18 PM
No wonder you are Trouble...i actually reading all your dumb jokes.  :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 20, 2014, 12:02:44 PM
No wonder you are Trouble...i actually reading all your dumb jokes.  :2funny: :2funny:

Glad you enjoyed them.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: ncokoj08 on August 21, 2014, 08:57:17 AM
Glad you enjoyed them.   ;D

i see you are much sexier after I read all your jokes!  O0
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 21, 2014, 10:32:53 AM
i see you are much sexier after I read all your jokes!  O0

I'm not sexy, I'm boring......an d somber.......a nd dull......and unexciting.... ..the list can go on and on and on.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 21, 2014, 10:56:24 AM
Q: What do you call a white guy in the ghetto?
A: A cop



Me: The police shot a thief in the finger and he died.
Friend: How did he die if he was shot in the finger?
Me: His finger was in his nose!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: ncokoj08 on August 21, 2014, 03:15:40 PM
where did you get all these jokes from?
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 21, 2014, 03:56:11 PM
where did you get all these jokes from?

Where do you think........f rom my friend.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 22, 2014, 10:29:34 AM
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, “Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?”
The other replied, “Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.”   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on August 22, 2014, 10:36:50 AM
Q: If your wife is shouting at the front door and your dog is barking at the back door, who do you let in first?
A: The dog, of course. At least he'll shut up after you let him in.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on August 22, 2014, 12:20:18 PM
LOL Yes it is mean.  ;D But funny too
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 26, 2014, 01:46:22 PM
Shoplifting

An old lady gets caught shoplifting. On court day the lady and her husband who goes with her stands before the judge and he says to her, "Why did you shoplift?" And she says "I was hungry." The judge says "What did you take?" She replys, "A can of peaches." So the judge trying to figure out how to punish her says, "How many peaches where in the can?" The lady says "6" so the judge says ok then 1 day per peach in jail that will be 6 days time served. The judge says would anyone like to say anything and her husband says your honor, "She stole a can of peas too."


Typical male  :knuppel2:    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 28, 2014, 08:19:18 PM
:2funny: :2funny: They never back you up.

I know......men!  Humph.   >:(     ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: ncokoj08 on September 17, 2014, 01:11:49 PM
Trouble, its time to take that purple jersey off...get into the silver baby. :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 22, 2014, 01:22:53 PM
Trouble, its time to take that purple jersey off...get into the silver baby. :D

I'll take it off when the season's over.  Hehehe.   :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 22, 2014, 01:24:33 PM
Unexpected sex – that’s a great way to wake up, IF you are not in prison…   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 22, 2014, 01:27:58 PM
Woman returns home and screams out loudly:
- Honey, pack your things, I've won a million today!

Husband comes to the wardrobe and asks:
- What kind of clothes to take with me? Summer or winter?

Woman:
- All of them and get out of here!

 ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 27, 2014, 01:58:58 PM
What did ProudLao's one eye say to the other eye?

Don't look now, but something between us smells.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on October 27, 2014, 02:14:38 PM
LMAO  ;D  :knuppel2: :idiot2: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 29, 2014, 08:48:04 AM
LMAO  ;D  :knuppel2: :idiot2: :2funny:

It's so you.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 29, 2014, 08:56:07 AM
Guy in a library walks up to the librarian and says, "I'll have a cheeseburger and fries, please."

Librarian responds, "Sir, you know you're in a library, right?"

Guy says, "Oh, sorry. [in a whisper] I'll have a cheeseburger and fries, please."

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on October 29, 2014, 08:59:38 AM
LMAO That is something you would do  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 29, 2014, 12:13:47 PM
LMAO That is something you would do  ;D

And you know because?   Oh yeah, that's right......you don't because you don't know me.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 29, 2014, 12:15:24 PM
A black guy was driving his Mercedes when, suddenly, one of the tires went flat. While he was changing his flat tire, another black came up behind him and smashed the front window saying, "right brotha, you take dem tires, I'll take the stereo!"

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 29, 2014, 12:19:01 PM
ProudLao banged at his neighbor's door.

"Your son just smashed the window on my car!" PL screamed.

"I'm so sorry, I'm sure he didn't mean it," she replied.

"That's not the point!" PL snapped. "He should know to look before he crosses the road."

 :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on October 29, 2014, 12:25:14 PM
A black guy was driving his Mercedes when, suddenly, one of the tires went flat. While he was changing his flat tire, another black came up behind him and smashed the front window saying, "right brotha, you take dem tires, I'll take the stereo!"

 ;D

Not funny? ::) ;D :D >:D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on October 29, 2014, 12:26:55 PM
ProudLao banged at his neighbor's door.

"Your son just smashed the window on my car!" PL screamed.

"I'm so sorry, I'm sure he didn't mean it," she replied.

"That's not the point!" PL snapped. "He should know to look before he crosses the road."

 :P

Watch your son lady  :P ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 29, 2014, 04:09:59 PM
I know that you thought they were funny, no need to admit it.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: minorcharacter on October 29, 2014, 04:16:33 PM
God damn, woman.  You have jokes!   :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 30, 2014, 12:51:08 PM
MC, you should know that by now.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 06, 2014, 08:18:21 PM
His wallet is like an onion. When he opens it, it makes him cry...


When a girl cries for you - don't be too emotional. Those tears are like a loan - you will have to pay it back with great interest.


It's easy to make woman happy......... ....but expensive.


 :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on November 07, 2014, 10:34:32 AM
Woman, enough said  ::) :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 10, 2014, 12:31:48 PM
Woman, enough said  ::) :P

 :2funny:   I know you can't live without them.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 10, 2014, 12:33:34 PM
While PL's driving, he feels like a god........he drives, others pray.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on November 10, 2014, 02:13:30 PM
:2funny:   I know you can't live without them.   ;D

I know you can't either  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on November 10, 2014, 02:14:24 PM
While PL's driving, he feels like a god........he drives, others pray.   ;D

So funny......... .............











NOT!  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 11, 2014, 09:09:31 AM
Smoking and death:

Smoking a cigarette reduces life by 5 minutes.  Laughing increases life by 10 minutes.  In conclusion, a laughing smoker won't die.

Smoking kills.......bu t if you don't smoke, that still doesn't mean you'll never die.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 18, 2014, 08:36:05 AM
Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women

1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8.
9.
10. 

 :2funny:     ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 18, 2014, 12:41:49 PM
A man died and went to The Judgment, they told him , “Before you meet with God,  I should tell you — we’ve looked over your life and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or bad. We’re not really sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?”

The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, “Yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a person who was being harassed by a group of thugs. So I pulled over, got out a bat, and went up to the leader of the thugs. He was a big, muscular guy with a ring pierced through his lip. Well, I tore the  ring out of his lip, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering this guy or they would have to deal with me!”

“Wow that’s impressive, “When did this happen?”

“About three minutes ago,” came the reply.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 30, 2014, 06:06:32 PM
Some Differences Between Men and Women

• Women have more imagination than men. They need it to tell men how wonderful they are.
• Women have a number of faults. Men have only two – everything they say and everything they do.
• A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.
• When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. When men are depressed, they invade another country.
• Diamonds are a girl’s best friend. Dogs are a man’s best friend. Now you know which sex is smarter.
• Men always want to be a woman’s first love. Women have a more subtle instinct: What they like is to be a man’s last romance.
• There are two times when a man doesn’t understand a woman – before marriage and after marriage.
• Only two things are necessary for a man to do to keep his wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.
• Some husbands are living proof that a woman can take a joke.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on November 30, 2014, 07:04:12 PM
Women are selfish and think they are smart but men will put them in their place  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 01, 2014, 01:02:53 PM
Women are selfish and think they are smart but men will put them in their place  ;D

We want you to think that you're smart and that we can be selfish.....fo r you to believe you'll be putting us in our place but in reality, we're molding you into what we want you to become.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on December 01, 2014, 01:05:39 PM
That's what we want you to think  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 02, 2014, 05:35:33 AM
And that's what we're letting you think.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on December 02, 2014, 08:05:05 AM
That's what we let you to believe  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 02, 2014, 01:37:07 PM
You can believe what you want to believe but we know what we let you think we believe.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on December 02, 2014, 01:44:07 PM
I said so, so you can believe and pretend to think you know that you let us believe you think you know  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 02, 2014, 04:54:07 PM
Do you know what you're saying about what you know or what you think you know?   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on December 03, 2014, 07:33:15 AM
Do you know you said what I said  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 03, 2014, 02:08:09 PM
No, I said more than what you said, even though you think I said what you said.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on December 04, 2014, 08:32:01 AM
You said blah blah and I know you did  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 04, 2014, 09:34:55 AM
IF I said "blah blah" then that would mean you said "blah blah" too, since you said I said what you said.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on December 04, 2014, 12:26:36 PM
Now you are seriously losing it. Earth to coo coo.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 29, 2014, 02:34:56 PM
PL went to the doctor complaining that his wife could barely hear. The doctor suggested a test to find out the extent of the problem. “Stand far behind her and ask her a question, and then slowly move up and see how far away you are when she first responds.” PL excited to finally be working on a solution for the problem, runs home and sees his wife preparing supper. ” Honey” he asks standing around 20 feet away “whats for supper?” After receiving no response he tried it again 15 feet away, and again no response. Then again at 10 feet away and again no response. Finally he was 5 feet away “honey, whats for supper?” She replies “For the fourth time it’s lasagna!”

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 02, 2015, 10:14:44 AM
LMAO  ;D :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 03, 2015, 09:54:39 PM
PL, I found something you posted on Craig's list  :D :

To the one who robbed my hut in Vientiane, Laos on 4/1.....you missed my dirty underwear.   If you would've taken the time to touch and sniff, you would've never left it behind.  I'll leave them outside my door tonight and you'll have your chance to snatch them.  If they're not there tomorrow, I'll know that you have them and have probably fainted outside my hut due to the dead fish smell oozing from my dirty underwears that haven't been washed for months.  No need to thank me.   I'm happy to oblige.

 ;D     :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 06, 2015, 07:17:18 AM
 :knuppel2: :knuppel2: :idiot2: :2funny:

tRouBLe, I got a text from your closest friends. And they told me that last week you went to an all female gathering and you were very loud and aggressive with children because you got woozy and buzz over sniffing a cork. They said you did not even touch the wine and you got drunk and started talking really loud and was freaking by yourself in front of children.  ;D :o :o :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 07, 2015, 09:16:18 AM
ProudLao: Can you talk?
tRouBLe: Yes, anything for you
ProudLao: I have a favor to ask of you
tRouBLe: Sure, anything for you
ProudLao: Can you come over, I really need a friend
tRouBLe: Uhm, right now, like right this second?
ProudLao: Yes
tRouBLe: Uhm, I can’t. Sorry
ProudLao: It’s ok
tRouBLe: I’m not good at listening
ProudLao: I know, but I could use a friend
tRouBLe: I really can’t walk the walk or talk the talk
ProudLao: Oh?
tRouBLe: But if you need someone to drink the drink, I’m the one
ProudLao: Thanks, but no thanks. I don’t drink
tRouBLe: Well, uhm, I offer

 ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 07, 2015, 06:49:52 PM
PL:  So what did you think of my jokes?
Me:  Lame.  *then I walk away*

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 08, 2015, 06:05:43 AM
Did you mean roll away? ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 08, 2015, 12:38:15 PM
No......but you could certainly be rolled away.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 08, 2015, 01:41:32 PM
Stop copying me, geeze.  ::) ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 15, 2015, 07:21:05 PM
I'm not copying you,  go reread.   Your sentence has five words while mine has eight.......yo urs is in the present tense while mine is in the past, need I say more......   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 21, 2015, 08:35:35 PM
Pee bah they say BLAH BLAH then WAH WAH  :2funny: :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 22, 2015, 02:38:59 PM
Quit speaking about yourself in the third person.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 25, 2015, 11:13:02 AM
Quit joming, goodness gracious  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 26, 2015, 02:29:10 PM
Are you going to finish that sentence off with.......gre at balls of fire?   ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 27, 2015, 09:38:45 AM
Lame...just like yourself lame lai lai  ;D

T: Knock Knock
P: Who's there
T: Me
P: Me, who?
T: New me
P: Lame  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 30, 2015, 09:45:00 AM
Talk about LAMER.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 30, 2015, 09:55:21 AM
You are still copying me  ::)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 30, 2015, 11:44:24 AM
Copying is what you make of it.  It's copying to you but a response from me.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on January 30, 2015, 12:20:14 PM
You do a lot of BLAH BLAH but it means the same thing.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on February 02, 2015, 09:11:17 PM
Seems like you understand a lot of that so called "blah blah."    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on February 02, 2015, 09:29:12 PM
After much convincing from me, PL finally agreed to call his wife to sing her happy birthday. It was only after he finished singing that the voice at the other end of the line informed him that it was the wrong number.

“Oh I’m sorry” he said, embarrassed.

“It’s ok," the voice said, “you can use all of the practice you can get!”


  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on February 03, 2015, 02:10:54 PM
LMAO  ;D

 :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on February 06, 2015, 10:42:17 AM
Gotcha!   :2funny:   I know, that was a good one.  >:D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: lilly on February 25, 2015, 10:52:50 AM
Two girls walk into a bar.  The bartender asked, "What can I get you two lovely ladies?"  The first girl says, "I'll have a cherry bomb."  The second girl says, "I'll have his key.  The one with the red label." 

Note: I JUST MADE THIS UP.  Hope you enjoyed it.  -Lilly
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 01, 2015, 07:25:07 PM
Thanks, Lilly, for sharing.    ;)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 01, 2015, 07:27:06 PM
Reaching the end of a job interview, the Human Resources Officer asks a young engineer fresh out of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, "And what starting salary are you looking for?"

The engineer replies, "In the region of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package."

The interviewer inquires, "Well, what would you say to a package of five weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every two years, say, a red Corvette?"

The engineer sits up straight and says, "Wow! Are you kidding?"

The interviewer replies, "Yeah, but you started it."

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 01, 2015, 07:34:32 PM
Mr. and Mrs. Smith had two daughters. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two girls decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for her sister behind garbage cans and bushes. Then she started looking in and under cars until a policeman approached her and asked, "What are you doing?" "Playing a game," the girl replied. "What is your name?" the officer questioned. "Mind Your Own Business," she answered. Furious the policeman inquired, "Are you looking for trouble?!" The girl replied, "Why, yes."   :P

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 01, 2015, 07:39:04 PM
A proud and confident genius makes a bet with an idiot. The genius says, "Hey idiot, every question I ask you that you don't know the answer, you have to give me $5. And if you ask me a question and I can't answer yours I will give you $5,000."

The idiot says, "Okay."

The genius then asks, "How many continents are there in the world?"

The idiot doesn't know and hands over the $5. The idiot says, "Now me ask: what animal stands with two legs but sleeps with three?"

The genius tries and searches very hard for the answer but gives up and hands over the $5000. The genius says, "Dang it, I lost. By the way, what was the answer to your question?"

The idiot hands over $5.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 03, 2015, 09:24:25 AM
My friend <insert name> thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.  Hahaha.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 04, 2015, 09:15:38 AM
Two ladies walk up to the bartender and asks about some new drinks. The bartender tells them they're out of fruits so no fruity drinks.  The ladies insists on a having a strawberry daiquiri and apricot schnapps.  Bartender explains again, no fruits for fruity drinks.  Frustrated he asks the two ladies the following questions and they answered.

Did mother nature put the straw in strawberries?

No, God did

Did mother nature put the ape in apricots?

No, God did

Did mother nature put the freak in fruit?

No, there's no freak'n fruit.

No, God freak'n fruit.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 04, 2015, 04:13:59 PM
Women should never say such misleading things like this:

A guy was shopping in the supermarket. 

A nice lady was waving at him and says, "Hello"

Confused the guy says, "Do you know me?"

The nice lady replies, "I think you're one of my kids father."

The confused guy says, "I was young and didn't know any better, I'm married now!"

The nice lady says, "I'm one of his teachers."

 ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 04, 2015, 05:30:26 PM
Mr. and Mrs. Smith had two daughters. One was named Mind Your Own Business & the other was named Trouble. One day the two girls decided to play hide and seek. Trouble hid while Mind Your Own Business counted to one hundred. Mind Your Own Business began looking for her sister behind garbage cans and bushes. Then she started looking in and under cars until a policeman approached her and asked, "What are you doing?" "Playing a game," the girl replied. "What is your name?" the officer questioned. "Mind Your Own Business," she answered. Furious the policeman inquired, "Are you looking for trouble?!" The girl replied, "Why, yes."   :P

(Mr. and Mrs.  Buzzness had two daughters.  One is named Mandy Honey Buzzness.  Her sister is named Trub Ling Buzzness)  :2funny:

The other three LaBouche musketeers brothers: Shaddup, Beeqyuatt, and Treble.  Treble was basically the black sheep musketeer.

One day, they agreed to meet up at their usual place and go drinking in town.  They get to the first tavern.  Bouncer at the front says, "What are your names?"  They proceed to reply, "LaBouche!  Shaddup, Beeqyuatt and..."  Bouncer cuts them off, "We don't want any Treble here."  So they leave and goes to the next tavern.  Same thing happens, They are asked what are their names and then told that they don't serve any one by the name of Treble.  This goes one for a few times.

They finally come to a very noisy bar full of ruffians.  There was an open table in the middle of the place.  They sit down and the barmaid gets to their table and asks, "I'm Jessie.  What are your names and what do you want?" 
Somewhat frustrated, the two musketeers replied loudly, "Shaddap, Beeqyuatt and we want Treble here too."
Bar maid says, "So just the two of you?"
Shaddup and Beeqyuatt looks at each other and looks around.  Treble was missing.  They replied, "Jessie wait, for Treble to come here."
Bar maid jumps up on the table in the middle of the room.
"Attention everyone! Ferme La Bouche! Shut UP and Be Quiet!  They're looking for TROUBLE!  Is there TROUBLE HERE!"

The biggest meanest ruffian steps up with his zealous posse backing him up, "So you're looking for TROUBLE?"

"No! We are Not!  We are Waiting for TREBLE!"
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 04, 2015, 08:09:07 PM
A middle age modern man gets a physical check up and takes the physician's prognosis to heart.

So he's now goes around town all happy with a hot gorgeous lady in arms every where he goes.

So he goes to get his hearing check out now with an ear doctor.  Swings his hot gorgeous lady all around, being all happy.

This ear doctor calls up his old physician and asks for his medical records, before giving him is prognosis.

The doctor asks the middle age man what his last prognosis was.

The middle age man replied.  "I was told to get a hot mamma and be cheerful when out in public."

The doctors says. "Your hearing is bad.  Says here you've got a heart murmur and be careful when out in public."
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 06, 2015, 09:40:07 AM
Funny, VH.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 06, 2015, 03:43:49 PM
Funny, VH.   ;D

LOL....I always like the trouble joke.  O0
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 09, 2015, 06:16:07 AM
The adventures of Trouble, Shaddup, and Beqwyatt

One day the three brothers, Trouble, Shaddup, Beqwyatt went for a drive.  Trouble turned onto the highway and was listening to the news radio.  In a few minutes the news radio reports, "We've just got several calls that there's Trouble on highway 94, going the wrong direction at high speed."

Trouble was kind of frustrate at how wrongly the news radio got their story wrong.  Tells Shaddup and Beqwyatt to calls the news radio station.

"What's your name and what's your news?"

"Shaddup and Beqwyatt, got your story straight.  We're looking at Trouble on highway 94, and there's hundreds of cars going the wrong direction."

 ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 09, 2015, 06:41:34 AM
Trouble at work:

Trouble is the top producer at work.  He's been very stress so they hired a new blonde worker.  Her name was Hayu Klueluz.  So Trouble told Hayu that he's gonna pretend to be a lightbulb on the ceiling.  The boss will think he's crazy stressed out and give him the day off.  Anyway Trouble was teaching Hayu how to do the work on her first day.

Later the boss walks in and see's Trouble hanging on the ceiling.  "What are you doing?"

Trouble says, "I'm a lightbulb!"

The boss says, "Clearly you are stressed out, you may take the rest of the day off.  See you bright and shiny tomorrow."

Trouble jumps down and walks off.  Hayu gets up and walks off right after Trouble.

The boss says, "Hey you clueless. Who do you think you are and where do you think you're going?"

Hayu replies, "That's right, I'm Klulezz and if there's no Trouble, I can't get any work done in the dark."

 ;D ;D ;D



Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 10, 2015, 03:13:41 AM
Trouble seeks advice on getting dates

So Trouble went to see a dating counselor and got some really good advice on how to get attention from women that next time he sees them in the bar.

Sure enough he goes to make use of it that night.  So Shaddup and Beqwyatt accompanies Trouble.  They get to the bar.  It was ladies night out for sure.  As usual the ladies ignore the three LaBouche brothers.  Trouble goes to make his move.

He sees a the green and yellow John Deere as prop in the corner of the bar.  He sits on it and chills with a beer.  Then he gets up, walks to the front of the John Deere, gets a great big grin, and does his sexy striptease swagger towards its.  He flexes his arms, does the Mr. Olympia pose, rips his shirt off, and rides his shirt.  He turns around and puts his buttocks on the grill of the John Deere and shakes.  By now all the women in the bar are looking at Trouble with jaws wide open.  They're all licking their chops.

Trouble sees how wonderful the advice of the dating counselor is working.

He yells, "Shaddup and Beqwyatt! I'm being sexy to a tractor (attract her)!"

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 10, 2015, 05:32:41 AM
Things we do and say that makes no sense:

Why do we drive on a parkway, but park on a driveway?

Why do we listen to a wise man, but we don't listen to a wise guy?

What do we put into a toaster?  Toast!  Wrong it's a slice of bread.

Why is it that one can order a Mexican Pizza, but can't even order an Italian Pizza?

If you know nothing, why are you full of it?


Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 15, 2015, 08:52:04 AM
VH, you got jokes.   ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 15, 2015, 08:21:41 PM
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 21, 2015, 10:09:15 AM
Why did the banana start to peel???


Because it forgot to put sunscreen on
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 26, 2015, 12:26:52 PM
Three daughters are named Jan, May, and April.  Their dad's name is August. What is their mother's name.

Is it June, November, or December?












Give up?












What do you think?






What is her name.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 28, 2015, 09:14:22 AM
I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport. :2funny: :2funny:

That was definitely funny.   ;D    ;)

Three daughters are named Jan, May, and April.  Their dad's name is August. What is their mother's name.

Is it June, November, or December?


Give up?


What do you think?


What is her name.

At first, I thought it was Three.   ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 15, 2015, 09:21:24 AM
A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.
 A man didn't come home 1 night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friends house. The wife called her husband's 10 best friends. 8 of them confirmed that he had slept over and 2 said he was still there.

This is TRUE thou, why is it thatmen cover for men and women don't :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 20, 2015, 01:03:10 PM
Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. "I’ll go into town for a doctor," the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the town’s only doctor, who is delivering a baby. "I can’t leave," the doctor says. ‘But here’s what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground." The guy ruins back to his friend, who is in agony. ‘What did the doctor say?" the victim asks. "He says you’re gonna die."


HAHAHAHAHA, I am still laughing!!!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 29, 2015, 02:45:09 PM
What only goes up but never goes down?

What runs continously without stopping ever?



Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 01, 2015, 02:12:19 PM
GS, those are some funny jokes.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on June 01, 2015, 02:20:31 PM
A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.
 A man didn't come home 1 night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friends house. The wife called her husband's 10 best friends. 8 of them confirmed that he had slept over and 2 said he was still there.

This is TRUE thou, why is it thatmen cover for men and women don't :P
Same ten best women friends.  Wife found a new friend.  Husband just merely went to sleep with all ten.  The last two were in the same bed with the husband.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 02, 2015, 08:19:06 AM
My wife was dying. I was by her bedside. She said in a tired voice, "Theres something i must confess."
 "Shhh" I said, "theres nothing to confess. Everythings alright."
"No i must die in peace. I had s*x with your brother, your best friend, his best friend and your father!"
 "I know," I whispered "Thats why i posion you, now close your eyes!!"

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on June 02, 2015, 09:09:44 AM
These jokes are getting a bit morbid... >:D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 02, 2015, 09:12:23 AM
LOL ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 02, 2015, 09:39:18 AM
My husband was dying. I was by his bedside. He said in a tired voice, "Theres something i must confess."
 "Shhh" I said, "theres nothing to confess. Everythings alright."
"No i must die in peace. I had s*x with your sister, your best friend, her best friend and your mother!"
 "I know," I whispered "Thats why i posion you, now close your eyes!!"

You should have changed it to that.   :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 02, 2015, 09:41:43 AM
LOL Trouble :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 02, 2015, 09:42:07 AM
This one is funny I thought:

14 Signs Your Online Relationship Isn't Working Out

14) You discover that "Chesty McBust" isn't her real name, and she's dialing in from Langley, VA.

13) You: Large, hairy man. Your online girlfriend: Large, hairy man.

12) Her postmaster rejects your e-mail not as "undeliverable" but as "unlikely to get you anywhere."

11) After months of shared experiences and emotional investments, she attacks you in the Mines of Quarn with a Vorpal Sword when she learns you're worth 45,000 points.

10) "Returned mail: User unknown and never wants to hear from you again."

9) Your cyber-lover is just too busy editing that silly little Top 5 List.

8) Getting perhaps a bit too comfortable, she lets a reference to cutting her chin shaving slip by.

7) You discover that she has been cutting and pasting her orgasms.

6) You can barely make out your S. L.'s face in the JPEG she sent because she's obscured by her 25 cats.

5) He claims to be the richest man in the world, but his GIF looks like some geek who works for a software company.

4) Since her first e-mail, Make.Money.Fas [email protected] has become cold and distant.

3) She's suddenly changed her address to [email protected]

2) Ken Starr launches an investigation into your relationship with the mysterious "[email protected]"

1) In an ironic twist of fate, you discover that the object of your affection is a curvaceous 18 year old, rather than the geeky 14 year old boy she'd pretended to be.

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 02, 2015, 09:59:03 AM
A man's wife had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet he had stayed by her bedside every single day. One day, when she came to, she motioned for him to come nearer. As he sat by her, she whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?" "What dear?" he asked gently, smiling as his heart began to fill with warmth. ”I think you're bad luck," she replied.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 02, 2015, 10:00:57 AM
 :2funny: that one is funny!!!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 02, 2015, 01:02:49 PM
:2funny: that one is funny!!!

I know.  Every time I read/hear it, it's still funny.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 02, 2015, 01:10:23 PM
PL married and had 13 children. When his wife died, he married again and had 7 more children. Again, his wife died so PL remarried and this time had 5 more children. Alas, he finally died. Standing before his coffin, the preacher prayed for him. He thanked the Lord for this very loving man and said, "Lord, they're finally together." One mourner leaned over and quietly asked his friend, "Do you think he means his first, second or third wife?" The friend replied, "I think he meant his legs."

 >:D    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 02, 2015, 05:54:59 PM
So mean!  >:( why do I have to die? ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 08:16:13 AM
Typical male response.    ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 08:26:47 AM
Girl calls 911.

Girl: Hello? I need your help!
911: Alright, What is it?
Girl: Two boys are fighting over me!
911: So what's your emergency?
Girl: The ugly one is winning.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 08:29:15 AM
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man, that's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days." The man replied, "I agree with you completely." "This must be a sign from God!" The woman continued, "And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." Then she hands the bottle to the man, The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cork back in and hands it back to the man. The man asks, "Aren't you having any?" The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police."

 >:D    :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 03, 2015, 08:29:16 AM
Hahahaha Trouble, that is funny!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 08:30:56 AM
Hahahaha Trouble, that is funny!

Glad you enjoyed it.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 03, 2015, 09:01:02 AM
A man died and went to The Judgment, they told him , “Before you meet with God,  I should tell you — we’ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or bad. We’re not really sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?”
 
The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, “Yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a person who was being harassed by a group of thugs. So I pulled over, got out a bat, and went up to the leader of the thugs. He was a big, muscular guy with a ring pierced through his lip. Well, I tore the  ring out of his lip, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering this guy or they would have to deal with me!”
 
“Wow that’s impressive, “When did this happen?”
 
“About three minutes ago,” came the reply.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 03, 2015, 11:11:45 AM
Typical male response.    ;D    :P

Typical mean woman. ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 03, 2015, 11:12:10 AM
Those are some funny stuff  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 03:09:42 PM
PL,  I know.......I know.  *pats myself on the back*   Hehehe.    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 03:12:33 PM
Giggles_Shyly:  What do you call a man in an institute of higher learning?
trouble:  A visitor.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 03, 2015, 03:43:24 PM
Giggles_Shyly:  What do you call a man in an institute of higher learning?
trouble:  A visitor.

 ;D

 :2funny: true and funny at the same time :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 03, 2015, 07:58:52 PM
:2funny: true and funny at the same time :2funny:

Funny...NOT. True...NOT  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 03, 2015, 08:01:18 PM
Giggles_Shyly:  What do you call a man in an institute of higher learning?
trouble:  A visitor.

 ;D

Lame  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 03, 2015, 08:13:12 PM
A quiet man, is a thinking man
A quiet woman, is usually mad
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 08:54:23 PM
:2funny: true and funny at the same time :2funny:

Exactly.    ;D

Lame  ;D

But I know you thought it was funny.    ;D

A quiet man, is a thinking man
A quiet woman, is usually mad

Was this suposed to be funny because I forgot to laugh.   :-X    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 08:58:43 PM
PL goes to a library.   :o《==amazing, I know   ;D

PL: I want the book, "Men - The most perfect, intelligent, and strong." . . . .
Librarian: Comic section is at the backside.

 :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2015, 09:04:28 PM
A masked man walks into a bank and holds it up at gunpoint to rob the bank. In the process of robbing the bank, his mask fell off. The robber quickly put it back on his face and asked the teller directly ahead of him if she saw his face. She admitted that she did, so he shot and killed her. He then turned to the teller that was beside the one he just killed and asked if he had also seen his face. He said that he did and the robber shot and killed him too. He then turned to a woman, a customer who just happened to be in the bank when the robbery was taking place. The robber asked the customer if she had seen his face. The customer replied, “No, but I’m pretty sure my husband did.”

 >:D    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 07:19:56 AM
A masked man walks into a bank and holds it up at gunpoint to rob the bank. In the process of robbing the bank, his mask fell off. The robber quickly put it back on his face and asked the teller directly ahead of him if she saw his face. She admitted that she did, so he shot and killed her. He then turned to the teller that was beside the one he just killed and asked if he had also seen his face. He said that he did and the robber shot and killed him too. He then turned to a woman, a customer who just happened to be in the bank when the robbery was taking place. The robber asked the customer if she had seen his face. The customer replied, “No, but I’m pretty sure my husband did.”

 >:D    ;D

LMBO, cause and effect in the favor of the witty woman. Talk about being in the right place at the right moment ::) :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 07:51:37 AM
What do you call a man that lost all of his intelligence?
 
A widow.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 07:51:50 AM
Why Men Are Like Computers:

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
 9. A better model is always just around the corner.
 8. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
 7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
 6. They’ll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
 5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
 4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
 3. The lights are on but nobody’s home.
 2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
 1. Size does matter.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 09:11:34 AM
GS, those would have been perfect for PL's "Sexist Jokes" thread.    ;D    ;)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 09:19:13 AM
ProudLao goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with passing gas, but it really doesn’t bother me too much. It never smells and it’s always silent. As a matter of fact I’ve passed gas at least 20 times since I’ve been here in your office. You didn’t know I was passing gas because it doesn’t smell and it’s silent." The doctor says "I see. Take these pills and come back to see me next week." The next week ProudLao goes back. "Doctor," he says, "I don’t know what you gave me, but now my passing gas… although still silent, it stinks terribly." "Good", the doctor said, "now that we’ve cleared up your sinuses, we’ll start to work on your hearing."

 :2funny:    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 09:24:46 AM
 :2funny: got me laughing silently to myself
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 09:30:02 AM
:2funny: got me laughing silently to myself

If you're referring to the joke about ProudLao...... .yeah, he has this thing with gas and smelling.  Hahaha.   >:D   :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 04, 2015, 11:11:07 AM
Exactly.    ;D

But I know you thought it was funny.    ;D

Was this suposed to be funny because I forgot to laugh.   :-X    ;D

It's funny to me and that's all that matter  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 04, 2015, 11:13:53 AM
LMAO thanks for sharing. Hilarious.




Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 01:43:53 PM
Giggles_Shyly: How do you know when a man is about to say something smart?
trouble: When he starts his sentence with, “A woman once told me…”


 ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 01:45:39 PM
Giggles_Shyly: How do you know when a man is about to say something smart?
trouble: When he starts his sentence with, “A woman once told me…”


 ;D    :P

LMBO, every man started out smart because he came from a woman :) where he ends up.... depends if he was taught by a woman or another man :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 01:46:05 PM
The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly." On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?" "Yes", the boy's mother answered. "And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked. "Who cares?" the mother replied.   :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 01:46:59 PM
LOL ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 01:47:45 PM
LMBO, every man started out smart because he came from a woman :) where he ends up.... depends if he was taught by a woman or another man :2funny:

We're beginning to sound like men bashers.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 01:49:03 PM
 8) play it kool :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 03:55:26 PM
Boyfriend: Do you think my salary is sufficient for you?
Girlfriend: It’s sufficient for me but how will you survive?

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 04, 2015, 03:57:09 PM
What mine is mine, what yours is mine. Isn't that how it goes? LOL funny one Trouble
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 04:07:00 PM
What mine is mine, what yours is mine. Isn't that how it goes? LOL funny one Trouble

That's right!   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 04:08:48 PM
This is mean but...........  >:D

I've spent the past two years looking for my ex-boyfriend's killer... but no one will do it.


 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 04, 2015, 04:12:55 PM
A man and a woman are lying in bed, watching the ceiling and keep quiet. What are they thinking....

The woman thinks, "He keeps quiet. He doesn’t want to talk. Maybe he’s getting tired of me. He doesn’t love me anymore. He’s probably got someone else. I see. We’ll have to separate from each other."

The man thinks, "A fly. A fly on the ceiling. Wow! How does it stay there and not fall?"

Men  :idiot2:    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 04, 2015, 04:20:53 PM
Giggles_Shyly: How do you know when a man is about to say something smart?
trouble: When he starts his sentence with, “A woman once told me…”


 ;D    :P

Sorry, those are boys lol

Us men we say "A wise man..." DUR  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 04, 2015, 04:22:50 PM
LMBO, every man started out smart because he came from a woman :) where he ends up.... depends if he was taught by a woman or another man :2funny:

Sorry, according to the bible women came from men's ribs  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 04, 2015, 04:25:29 PM
A man and a woman are lying in bed, watching the ceiling and keep quiet. What are they thinking....

The woman thinks, "He keeps quiet. He doesn’t want to talk. Maybe he’s getting tired of me. He doesn’t love me anymore. He’s probably got someone else. I see. We’ll have to separate from each other."

The man thinks, "A fly. A fly on the ceiling. Wow! How does it stay there and not fall?"

Men  :idiot2:    ;D

Women needs psychological help lol
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 05, 2015, 11:12:58 AM
Sorry, those are boys lol

Us men we say "A wise man..." DUR  ;D

MEN?!   :2funny:   Have you forgotten what's written underneath your name, little boy?    ;D

Women needs psychological help lol

Yeah, if they have to deal with men because men are  :idiot2:.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 05, 2015, 11:21:51 AM
Young at heart. You should try that old fart  ;D  :P

Women can't deal nothing with men, but they can be whiny with boys. BLAH BLAH much? ;D



Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 05, 2015, 11:32:05 AM
A woman inserted an ad in the classifieds: “husband wanted”. Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: “You can have mine.”

 :2funny: ;D :2funny: ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 05, 2015, 11:34:38 AM
The Future
 A woman worries about the future — until she gets a husband.
 A man never worries about the future — until he gets a wife.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 05, 2015, 12:30:58 PM
 ;D :P ::) :D ;D ;D

(http://www.guy-sports.com/fun_pictures/sale21miles.jpg)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 05, 2015, 01:13:43 PM
;D :P ::) :D ;D ;D

(http://www.guy-sports.com/fun_pictures/sale21miles.jpg)

LOL, only tells you we care about our hard earned money ::)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 08, 2015, 08:29:06 AM
You two are too funny.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 08, 2015, 08:33:28 AM
A sexy woman walks up to the counter and motions the bartender, ProudLao, to come over. She starts to run her fingers through his hair and asks to speak to the manager. ProudLao replies, "Sorry, the manager is out. Can I help you?" By this time the woman has run her fingers over his face and in his mouth where he is gently sucking on them. She says, "You sure he isn’t here?" ProudLao mumbles through her fingers, "Yes, he’s out for another 2 hours. Are you sure there is nothing I can do to help?" The woman then says, "Oh, I only wanted to tell him there’s no toilet paper or soap in the ladies toilets!"

 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 08, 2015, 08:35:37 AM
Giggles_Shyly: What are a married man's two greatest assets?
trouble: A closed mouth and an open wallet.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 08, 2015, 11:31:44 AM
Giggles_Shyly: What are a married man's two greatest assets?
trouble: A closed mouth and an open wallet.

 ;D

ROFL.... that is funny!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 08, 2015, 12:06:15 PM
tRouBLe is driving for 1st time on the highway. Her boyfriend calls says: "Be careful love, It's just been on the radio, that someone is driving opposite to the traffic on the highway.." tRouBLe replies: "Someone...? These rascals are in hundreds!"

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 09, 2015, 08:54:00 AM
What men's statements really mean:

Statement: "You're the only girl I've ever cared about."
True Meaning: "You are the only girl who hasn't rejected me."

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 09, 2015, 08:57:24 AM
I found this one funny :2funny:

Q. Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking?
A. They already have boyfriends.

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 10, 2015, 12:26:16 PM
Funny PL and GS.   ;D    O0
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 10, 2015, 12:28:22 PM
A woman walks into a supermarket and buys:

1 bar of soap
1 toothbrush
1 tube of toothpaste
1 loaf of bread
1 pint of milk
1 single serving of cereal
1 single serving frozen dinner
1 can of Soup For One
1 16oz can of Miller Lite

The guy at the checkout looks at her and says, "Single, are you?" The woman smiles sweetly and replies, "How did you guess?" He replies, “Because you’re ugly.”

Mean but funny.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 10, 2015, 06:59:51 PM
LMAO ;D that was mean. Yeah, mean like you. ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 10, 2015, 07:49:21 PM
LOL Trouble, but if he sees it as so, can't blame him for his honesty :-X
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 10, 2015, 08:14:21 PM
Giggles_Shyly and tRouBLe are sitting at the country club by the pool. Giggles_Shyly says, "When I had my first child, my husband bought me a diamond ring." tRouBLe says, "Well, isn't that nice."Giggles_Shyly says, "When my second child was born, my husband took me on a cruise."  tRouBLe says,''well isn't that nice. Giggles_Shyly continues, "When my third child was born, my husband took me on a trip around the world." And tRouBLe  says, once again, "Well, isn't that nice." Giggles_ Shyly ask "Well, what did your husband get you when your first child was born?" tRouBLe repiles, "My husband sent me to finishing school." Giggles_Shyly asks, "Well why did he do that?" And tRouBLe says, "So I could learn to say ‘Well isn't that nice,’ instead of SHUT UP  ;D :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 11, 2015, 02:56:18 PM
LOL Trouble, but if he sees it as so, can't blame him for his honesty :-X

Yes.......but that's so mean.   Hehehe.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 11, 2015, 03:02:08 PM
ProudLao and Giggles_Shyly are both mental patients. One day, ProudLao jumps into the swimming pool but doesn't come up for air. Quick as a flash, Giggles_Shyly sees her friend in trouble, so she dives in and pulls him out. Later, the hospital director calls Giggles_Shyly into his office and says "Giggles_Shyly, I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is, we are releasing you as you are obviously sane 'saving anothers life'. But unfortunately, the bad news is that ProudLao hung himself in the bathroom ..." "Oh no," Giggles_Shyly replies, "that's where I put him to dry!"

 >:D    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 11, 2015, 03:14:15 PM
ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! O0 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 11, 2015, 07:45:59 PM
ROFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!! O0 :2funny:

Wouldn't you agree that my joke was better than PL's?   Someone......u h hum.....dies in mine.   ;D    >:D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 12, 2015, 12:01:09 PM
ProudLao, a new vacuum cleaner salesman, knocked on the door on the first house of the street. A tall lady named Trouble answered the door. Before she could speak, enthusiastical ly ProudLao barged into the living room and opened a big black plastic bag and poured all the cow droppings onto the carpet. "Madam, if I can not clean this up within 5 minutes with the use of this new powerful Vacuum cleaner, I will EAT all this dung!" exclaimed ProudLao eagerly. "Do you need chilly sauce or ketchup with that," asked Trouble. Bewildered, ProudLao asked, "Why, madam?" "There's no electricity in the house…" said Trouble.

 >:D    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 12, 2015, 12:20:55 PM
Wouldn't you agree that my joke was better than PL's?   Someone......u h hum.....dies in mine.   ;D    >:D

LOL I agree!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 12, 2015, 06:30:17 PM
tRouBLe and her boyfriend are living together. The boyfriend came home from work one day and tRouBLe had a rope around her waist. The boyfriend asked why the rope was around her waist. tRouBLe said that she was trying to commit suicide. The boyfriend said, "You put it around your neck! " tRouBLe replied, "I tried that but I couldn't breathe! "
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 12, 2015, 06:32:29 PM
Hehehe.  PL, you know I'm not really a blonde, right.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 12, 2015, 06:37:47 PM
On a crowded bus, an old man named ProudLao noticed that a young woman, Giggles_Shyly, had her eyes closed.  "What's the matter? Are you sick?" he asked.  "No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see old men standing." she replied.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 12, 2015, 06:38:29 PM
NO, REALLY?! Lol

Knee slapper sonny!!!!  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 12, 2015, 06:39:34 PM
LMAO GS is a meanie ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 12, 2015, 06:50:58 PM
Trouble walked into a shop and got some dog food, she went to pay for it and the cashier ProudLao said, "You can’t buy that dog food, we need evidence that you have a dog." So she brought in her dog and she got the dog food. The next day, Trouble went to get some cat food and ProudLao said, "You can’t have that cat food, we need evidence that you have a cat." So she went home and got her cat and she got the cat food. On the third day, Trouble went in again and she had a box, she told ProudLao to put his finger in it so he did. He said it felt warm and soft, Trouble then said, "Now that you’re satisfied. Can I have some toilet paper please!"

 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 13, 2015, 10:42:03 AM
 "If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up " said the ambiguous  tRouBLe. After a long silence, the other tRouBLe rose to her feet."Now then, why do you consider yourself an idiot? " enquired the ambiguous tRouBLe with a sneer."Well, actually I don't," said the other tRouBLe, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself. "
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 13, 2015, 11:14:46 AM
Trouble walked into a shop and got some dog food, she went to pay for it and the cashier ProudLao said, "You can’t buy that dog food, we need evidence that you have a dog." So she brought in her dog and she got the dog food. The next day, Trouble went to get some cat food and ProudLao said, "You can’t have that cat food, we need evidence that you have a cat." So she went home and got her cat and she got the cat food. On the third day, Trouble went in again and she had a box, she told ProudLao to put his finger in it so he did. He said it felt warm and soft, Trouble then said, "Now that you’re satisfied. Can I have some toilet paper please!"

 :2funny:

Hahahaha, serves PL his proof :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 14, 2015, 06:19:13 PM
"If there are any idiots in the room, will they please stand up " said the ambiguous  tRouBLe. After a long silence, the other tRouBLe rose to her feet."Now then, why do you consider yourself an idiot? " enquired the ambiguous tRouBLe with a sneer."Well, actually I don't," said the other tRouBLe, "but I hate to see you standing up there all by yourself. "

I've heard this joke before but it had a different name.........a name that starts with "P."    :P

Hahahaha, serves PL his proof :P

 ;D    ;)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 14, 2015, 06:20:38 PM
ProudLao: "How would you describe me?" 
Trouble: "ABCDEFGHIJK." 
ProudLao: "What does that mean?" 
Trouble: "Athletic, brave, chivalrous, daring, efficient, fearless, gallant, and handsome." 
ProudLao: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" 
Trouble: "I'm just kidding!"

 ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 15, 2015, 07:38:37 PM
LMAO  :) grrrrr need to find a better one!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 16, 2015, 07:43:33 AM
Giggles and Trouble calls the police to report their friend ProudLao as missing. The police arrive and ask for a description. They tell them he's 6 foot 2 inches tall, black wavy hair and has a smile that makes everybody love him. The police then go to the next door neighbor to verify this report and the lady next door tells the police, "You can't believe them. He's 5 foot 4 inches tall, bald and he wears a perpetual frown on his face." The neighbor then goes and asks the women why they gave the police such a false report. They replied, "Just because we reported him missing, doesn't mean we wanted him back!"

 :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :P

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 16, 2015, 11:59:38 AM
LMAO  :D ;D :2funny: :knuppel2: Good one GS.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 18, 2015, 08:57:19 PM
GS, I would totally do that to PL.   >:D    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 19, 2015, 12:44:09 PM
ProudLao is a patient at a mental hospital, he is told to go out into the world and find out something new about it. After about 3 hours, he goes back to the hospital and tells the the manager what he has learned. ProudLao goes up to the manager and puts a large spider on the table and shouts, "BOO" and the spider scurries under the table. He then picks up the spider, pulls all of it's legs off and shouts, "BOO" but the spider can't move. The manager then looks strangely at him and asks him what he has learned about the world. ProudLao replies, "When I pull all the legs off a spider it can't hear me!"

PL, I always knew you were  :idiot2:.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 19, 2015, 12:51:35 PM
LOL, such torture...mind wise :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 19, 2015, 04:18:42 PM
Lmao grrrrr been busy, gonna get both y'all back  :knuppel2: :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 19, 2015, 05:56:04 PM
Trouble, Giggles_Shyly, and ProudLao are stranded on a desert island.  They find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. Trouble wishes she was off the island and back home. *poof*  She disappears back home. Giggles_Shyly wishes the same. *poof*  She disappears and returns home.  ProudLao says, "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here." *poof*  Trouble and Giggles_Shyly reappear on the island.

Grrrrr.   :idiot2:  PL, I can see you doing this.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 19, 2015, 05:59:53 PM
LOL! ProudLao is gonna get :knuppel2: ::) :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 20, 2015, 07:43:40 AM
LOL  ;D

Giggles_Shyly and tRouBLe sit in the room and enjoys a bottle of wine. Suddenly tRouBLe says, I love you. Giggles_Shyly asks in surprise, Is that you or wine talking?  This is me, I'm talking to the wine tRouBLe replies.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 20, 2015, 10:50:21 AM
For a moment there, I was thinking something else.    :o   Hehehe.  I've seen that before between a male, female, and beer.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 20, 2015, 11:05:28 AM
I don't have a dirty mind like you  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 20, 2015, 12:13:04 PM
PL doesn't have a dirty mind only his mind is in the dirt :P ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on June 25, 2015, 06:08:31 AM
For that here's another one for both of you  ;D


tRouBLe comes home late at night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From
under the blanket she notices four legs instead of two! She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.

Once she's done, she goes to the kitchen to have a drink. As she enters, she sees her boyfriend there, reading a magazine.

Hi, he says, your friend Giggles_Shyly and her boyfriend have come to visit us and they were very tired, so I let them stay in our bedroom. Hope you have said hello to them.

 ;D :D :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 25, 2015, 07:22:51 AM
Hahahaha.... so brutal  :D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 25, 2015, 12:17:09 PM
Sorry for beating you, GS.  I thought it was PL visiting.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 25, 2015, 12:24:48 PM
PL and his wife are celebrating their 30 years anniversary of marriage. PL asks his wife, "We have grown 12 kids, but PL Junior is different from the rest.  He seems to be pee bah.  Please tell me honestly, I will forgive you, but I want to know......mayb e you have cheated on me?"  His wife replies, "Yes, I'm sorry and I did cheat on you. PL Junior is your real son..."

 >:D    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 25, 2015, 12:41:08 PM
Tai Lau, you've got some imagination there.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 25, 2015, 12:49:40 PM
Lmbo Tai Lau
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 25, 2015, 12:50:25 PM
Trouble that is funny!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 26, 2015, 12:27:04 PM
Women are Angels.  And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly.........on a broomstick.  We're flexible like that.

 >:D   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 06, 2015, 12:14:14 PM
 ;D

tRouBLe: I hate that beggar.
Giggles_Shyly: Why?
tRouBLe: Yesterday I gave him food and today he gave me a book "How to Cook"!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 06, 2015, 07:00:53 PM
PL, that was actually funny and cute.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 07, 2015, 10:15:42 AM
LOL PL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 07, 2015, 11:16:07 AM
An old couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in their home.

"Just think," the old man says, "we were sitting here at this same breakfast table, naked as jaybirds, 50 years ago."

"Well," the old lady snickers, "what do you say -- should we get naked?"

The two immediately strip to the buff and sit back down at the table. "You know, honey," the little old lady says slyly, "My breasts burn for you now as they did 50 years ago."

"I'm not surprised," replies the old man. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!

 :D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 07, 2015, 11:31:57 AM
LMAO  :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 07, 2015, 12:29:28 PM
Funny.  Hehehe.    ;D

GS, you should have switched it so the man would've said that, because it works too.    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 07, 2015, 12:49:46 PM
Here you go lol

The crazy lesbian couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in their chicken coop they called home.


"Just think," tRouBLe says, "we were sitting here at this same breakfast table, naked as jaybirds, 50 years ago."

"Well," Giggles_Shyly whisper while farting, "what do you say -- should we get naked?"

The two immediately strip to the buff and sit back down at the table. "You know, honey," tRouBLe says while sniffing the fart in heavily, "My breasts burn for you now as they did 50 years ago."

"I'm not surprised," replies Giggles_Shyly. "One's in your coffee and the other is in your oatmeal!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 07, 2015, 12:58:09 PM
OMGOSH.  PL, you're such a dork.   :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 07, 2015, 12:59:12 PM
 ;D ;D :2funny: :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 08, 2015, 10:01:48 PM
After an hour of gathering up his courage, ProudLao finally approaches the hot girl at the end of the bar. "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?"

She yells, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight, you pig!"

Everyone in the bar stops and stares. Completely embarrassed, ProudLao slinks back to his table with a red face.

After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. I'm a graduate student in psychology, and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing public situations."

To which ProudLao responds as loudly as possible, "What do you mean $200 for the night!?"  >:D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 09, 2015, 07:38:18 AM
Lmbo Tai Lau... amazing story, interestingly enough, i want to hear more.. :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 09, 2015, 07:54:28 AM
Tai Lau, maybe you waited too long? ::) one of my buddies has this 7 year plan, Date the girl for 2-3 years, live with the girl for 3 more years, the end of the 7th year, ask her to marry him. Uh, hello... some people can't wait that long :2funny:

He is still single btw, I wonder why ::) :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 09, 2015, 08:19:17 AM
GS and TL, those were funny.   ;D   O0

GS, in regards to the seven years........p eople should not wait for seven years because I've heard of the "seven year itch."  It's a rough point in time for couples.  They've been together so long that they are tired and/or bored with their partner, BUT haven't been together long enough to have accepted the routine that is being in a relationship.  Some people miss being single and would like a different partner while others just miss the freedom of being single and having no strings/responsibilities attached, but they do not want another partner.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 09, 2015, 08:22:46 AM
Agreed Trouble, he is non traditional in every sense and he says his plan is to ensure him a decent woman that will stay till the end ;D there are too many faults in his plan.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 10, 2015, 06:19:01 AM
PL, you know that GG and TT lives in MN, right?

almost true story...

the first time I met them at the (strip) club, they were simply amazing, totally sexy, tall and gorgeous.
I asked them..."I'm in love with you ladies, how can I make sure we see each other again?"
They replied, "Meet us at Louis Vuitton on Rodeo Boulevard in Beverley Hills."
I haven't seen them since!

I think they scared of me!  :P

No, but thanks for the info  ;D

LMAO
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 10, 2015, 06:25:12 AM
tRouBLe was in in the public restroom
She was barely sitting down when she heard a voice in the other stall:
"Hi, how are you?" said Giggles_Shyly
tRouBLe: (embarrassed) "Doing' fine"
Giggles_Shyly: "So what are you up to?"
tRouBLe: "Uhhh, I'm like you, just sitting here peeing and pooping."
Giggles_Shyly: "Can I come over?"
tRouBLe: (attitude) "No, I'm a little busy right now!"
Giggles_Shyly: "Listen, I'll have to call you back. There's an idiot in the other stall who keeps answering all my questions!

 ;D :D :P :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 10, 2015, 06:53:59 AM
LOLOLOL PL! I have had such a scenario happened to me before while shopping. I was on the phone and a customer answered questions i asked the person i was phoning with...lol
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 10, 2015, 09:12:43 AM
Tai Lau, are you sure we live there?   >:D    :D

Giggles_Shyly, yes.......the problem is it will give the female seven years to see all his faults.  By then or even before, she may want to move on.......by herself.    ;D

PL, I've heard that one before.   It's so five years ago.  Hehehe.    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 10, 2015, 09:54:31 AM
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is ProudLao, one is Datjuanguy, one is Tai Lau, and the last one is TKE589. ProudLao walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all the girls who left me" and jumps off the roof. Next, the Datjuanguy walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all the people who misunderstood me" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the Tai Lau's turn. He walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all people who ever did me wrong" and then throws TKE589 off the roof. (must be because they both missed the Petal boat :D )

I thought I add names and step it up a notch. Enjoy!!!  ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 10, 2015, 10:05:31 AM
Damn it, why can't I be Tai Lau  ;D I don't wanna commit suicide over girls, please  >:D.  :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 10, 2015, 10:15:53 AM
LMAO immigrants  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 10, 2015, 10:20:30 AM
Imaginative Tai Lau ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 10, 2015, 10:20:51 AM
GS and TL, good ones.    :2funny:

GS, I thought you were going to write that Tai Lau said, "This is for all the ladies who wouldn't sleep with me."     ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 10, 2015, 10:23:24 AM
I thought about it Trouble..... but it would of been too below the belt ;) :2funny: :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 10, 2015, 10:42:10 AM
Hahaha.  You two are funny.   ;D

TL, I'd do what you did in the joke.  I wouldn't jump, but I would "assist" someone else in jumping.  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 10, 2015, 10:45:39 AM
I could see Tai Lau talking someone into jumping off :P or assisting them. Like he says, he is a hands on type of person ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 10, 2015, 11:10:54 AM
Hahahaha :D yeah, that show them neighbors :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 10, 2015, 12:04:45 PM
How does a thug chicken talk?

What the cluck this, cluck that.  Cluck the clucker. Cluck it.

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 10, 2015, 12:26:56 PM
I'm so  >:(  at my blonde girlfriend GG...we've been listening to the next door neighbor's dog. It has been in the backyard barking for hours and hours. She jumps up out of bed and says, "I've had enough of this". She goes downstairs. She finally comes back up to bed and I asked her, "The dog is still barking, What have you been doing?" she replies, "I put the dog in our backyard, let's see how THEY like it!"

 :idiot2: :knuppel2:

I didn't get passed the "girlfriend" part.  Are you making GS and me a couple now?  Is there something you want to tell us?  Hehehe.   :D

How does a thug chicken talk?

What the cluck this, cluck that.  Cluck the clucker. Cluck it.

You know how PL talks......... ....what the hamburger.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 13, 2015, 08:16:24 AM
A few days after Tai Lau wife's death, a grieving widow accidentally receives an e-mail from a woman waiting for her husband in Miami.

The e-mail reads:

Dearest Husband,

Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

 ;D If it was me, I be freaked out  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 13, 2015, 08:37:43 AM
A ProudLao and his wife check into a cheap hotel. ProudLao goes down to the bar, but his tired wife goes up to the room to lie down. Suddenly, an elevated train passes by very close to the window, shakes the room and throws her out of bed. She lies down again, but the same thing happens.

She calls the front desk, and the manager comes up to investigate. The wife says, "Lie here on the bed, you'll be thrown right to the floor."

The manager lies down next to the wife just as ProudLao walks in.

"What's going on here?" demands ProudLao.

The manager replies, "Would you believe I'm waiting for a train?" :D :D :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 13, 2015, 11:37:48 AM
LOL That's so 70's Giggles_Shyly  ;D


Giggles_Shyly an Asian Redneck scientist is on a project about a white wannabe woman named tRouBLe and her behavior.

Giggles_Shyly poke at tRouBLe with a toothpick and shouts RUN. tRouBLe starts running.

Giggles_Shyly cut off tRouBLe’s arms and shouts RUN. tRouBLe again runs this time but slower.

Giggles_Shyly proceed with breaking tRouBLe’s legs with a hammer and shouts RUN. tRouBLe scrambles but very slowly.

Giggles_Shyly then chop off tRouBLe’s legs and shouts RUN. Poor tRouBLe moan and groan loudly but no movement.

Giggles_Shyly summarises in the end - tRouBLe became deaf if you chop off her legs not white!

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 13, 2015, 11:40:27 AM
 :D ;D OMGeee, for the love of SCIENCE there are always sacrifices :P sorry Trouble, it's all ProudLao's fault!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 13, 2015, 01:01:07 PM
GS, those were funny.   ;D

PL, that's like my spider joke but you expanded upon it.   ::)    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 13, 2015, 01:11:52 PM
Tai Lau, VillainousHero, and ProudLao were walking along in the forest when they were captured by a group of cannibals. The king of the cannibals gives the three men a challenge "If you complete this challenge, you will go free, if not we will eat you." The three men, not wanting to die, agree to hear the challenge. "You must go into the forest, pick out 10 of any fruit you find, and bring those fruits back here" the king says. The three men head out in search of their fruit. Tai Lau comes back with 10 apples in his hands, happy as can be. The king then says "You must shove those 10 apples up your butt without making a sound." Tai Lau reluctantly agrees to try. He gets the first one up without a sound, but screams in agony on the second and is killed and eaten. VillainousHero comes back with 10 grapes in his hand. Again the king states the challenge. The 10 fruit up the butt, without any sound. This is going to be easy VillainousHero thinks. He gets through the first 9 without a single sound. Just as he is about to shove the 10th grape up, he bursts out in laughter. He is killed immediately. VillainousHero still laughing meets Tai Lau up in heaven. Tai Lau says, "What's so funny? You could have still been alive!"  VillainousHero replies "I saw ProudLao coming back with 10 pineapples and a huge smile."

 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 13, 2015, 01:19:25 PM
ROFLMBO, now that is a funny joke. It was a worthy death for VillainousHero ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 13, 2015, 01:42:22 PM
I would be laughing too if I saw PL come back with those......... ...so "proud" and thinking that he outdid the others.   :2funny:   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 13, 2015, 01:47:10 PM
 :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:

Can apples...
Pine apples...

Pine apples have to be chopped with machete...LOL

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 14, 2015, 07:27:42 AM
ProudLao, Tai Lau, and VillianousHero go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, Tai Lau on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting sexually harassed by my boss!" VillianousHero on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream, too. Then ProudLao in the middle wakes up and says, "That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!" ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 14, 2015, 07:59:35 AM
Three guys are sitting in a sauna: a Mexican, an Asian, and a white guy. The Mexican and white guy are showing off their new tech gadgets. The white guy says, "Hey, look what I got: the new Google Glass!" The Mexican & Asian say, "Wow, that's nice, man." Then the Mexican guy says, "Check out my new cellphone; it's a watch!" The white guy and Asian say, "Very cool, dude." The Asian guy has nothing to show these guys, so he gets up and walks away naked to to the bathroom. Then he comes back 5 minutes later from the bathroom still naked with paper hanging out of his butt crack. The Mexican and white guy say, "Hey, you have something hanging out of your ass." The Asian guy says, "Oh look, I'm receiving a Fax!"

 :2funny: :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 14, 2015, 08:00:34 AM
LOL Tai Lau! ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 14, 2015, 02:57:14 PM
Movie ratings explained, but the guys are probably more interested in this information:

G: Nobody gets the girl.
PG: The good guy gets the girl.
R: The bad guy gets the girl.
X: Everybody gets the girl!

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 14, 2015, 06:47:13 PM
Giggles_Shyly in a short, cute skirt walks up to a policeman on the street and says, "I have a problem." The policeman asks her what it is, she points to a man across the street and says, "See that man?" The policeman replies, "Yes, is he watching you?" She replies, " NO!  That's the problem!"

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 14, 2015, 09:26:13 PM
LMBO funny one Trouble  ;D :2funny: :police:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 15, 2015, 08:22:43 AM
Typical women  ;D ;D Me me me  ::) ::) :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 15, 2015, 10:41:25 AM
 :2funny: funny Tai Lau!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 15, 2015, 11:44:15 AM
That's funny that the foreigner knows five languages and none of them were English.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 17, 2015, 11:56:43 AM
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "The driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

:2funny: :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 17, 2015, 08:50:31 PM
GS, mean but funny.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 17, 2015, 08:57:49 PM
ProudLao, VillainousHero, and Tai Lau left separately after a very late night out drinking Coronas until the early hours. They met the next day for an early happy hour, and compared notes about who had been the most drunk. ProudLao claims that he was the drunkest, saying, "I drove straight home, walked into the house, and as soon as I got through the door, I ate chunks". To which VillainousHero replied, "You think that was drunk? I got in my car, drove out of the parking lot, and wrapped my car around the first tree I saw. I don't even have insurance!" And Tai Lau proclaimed, "I was by far the most drunk. I got home, I got in a big fight with my wife, knocked a candle over and burned the whole house down!" They all looked at each other for a moment. Then ProudLao says: "Guys, I don't think you understand. Chunks is my dog."

 ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 18, 2015, 06:20:42 AM
 :D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 18, 2015, 11:26:31 AM
Two drunk friends, ProudLao and Tai Lau, are walking along. ProudLao says to Tai Lau, "What a beautiful night, look at the moon." Tai Lau stops and looks at ProudLao. "You're wrong, that's not the moon, that's the sun." They began to argue when they come upon another drunk, VillainousHero . They asked, "Sir, could you please help settle our argument? Tell us what that thing is up in the sky that's shining. Is it the moon or the sun?" VillainousHero looked at the sky and said, "Sorry, I don't live around here."

 :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 18, 2015, 11:37:19 AM
LMBO..... Hero must be an alien? :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 18, 2015, 02:11:35 PM
LMAO VH needs to be drunk to see the shining light 😜
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 20, 2015, 10:18:02 AM
LMBO..... Hero must be an alien? :D

He was drunk too.   :D

LMAO VH needs to be drunk to see the shining light 😜

You must be selective reading again.   :idiot2:  Go reread.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 21, 2015, 01:51:50 PM
ProudLao took his blind date to the carnival. "What would you like to do first, Ivanna Mann?" asked ProudLao.

"I want to get weighed," said Ivanna Mann. They ambled over to the weight guesser. He guessed 120 pounds. She got on the scale; it read 117 and she won a prize. Next, the couple went on the Ferris Wheel. When the ride was over, ProudLao again asked Ivanna Mann what she would like to do.

"I want to get weighed," she said. Back to the weight guesser they went. Since they had been there before, he guessed her correct weight, and ProudLao lost his dollar. The couple walked around the carnival and again he asked where to next. "I want to get weighed," she responded.

By this time, ProudLao figured she was really weird and took her home early, dropping her off with a handshake.

Her roommate, Laura, asked her about the blind date, "How did it go?"

Ivanna Mann responded, "Oh, Waura, it was wousy."
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 22, 2015, 08:45:47 AM
LOLOL Trouble and Tai Lau :D :D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 22, 2015, 09:02:00 AM
GS, I originally had your name in there but Ivanna Mann is perfect for PL.   ;D


TL, this is all I have to say.   :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 22, 2015, 01:13:16 PM
ProudLao calls his mom...

PL:  Mom mom!! I'm a genius!
Mother:  Really dear? How's that possible?
PL:  I finished a puzzle that I've been working on for 1 year and on the box it said 'for 2-5 yrs'.



PL can be a blonde at times.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 22, 2015, 01:17:36 PM
A teacher says, "Whoever answers my next question can go home."  One boy throws his bag out the window.  The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?!"  The boy replies, "Me! I’m going home now."

 O0   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 22, 2015, 01:40:50 PM
ProudLao's mother asks for his report card. ProudLao replies, "I don't have it." "Why not?" His mother asks. "My friend, Giggles_Shyly, just borrowed it. She wants to scare her parents."

 ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 22, 2015, 01:50:32 PM
And my mom fainted :D but I yelled out "JK" and was too late, she already wasn't responsive :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 22, 2015, 01:59:55 PM
ProudLao calls his mom...

PL:  Mom mom!! I'm a genius!
Mother:  Really dear? How's that possible?
PL:  I finished a puzzle that I've been working on for 1 year and on the box it said 'for 2-5 yrs'.



PL can be a blonde at times.   ;D

 :2funny: :2funny: This is funny.. I like this one the most.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 22, 2015, 08:06:09 PM
LOL I'll be back with my own jokes. It's war!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 22, 2015, 08:27:31 PM
And my mom fainted :D but I yelled out "JK" and was too late, she already wasn't responsive :P

You are in for a joke GS  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 22, 2015, 08:28:26 PM
:2funny: :2funny: This is funny.. I like this one the most.

Lol sure have a laugh at my expense  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 22, 2015, 08:36:43 PM
Trah Belle, Sha Dub, and Bee Qwyatt went on blind dates approved by their mom.  So it was a triple date.  They all met at the right location at the right time.  So the introductions go.

The guys asked for the ladies name.

The ladies took turn with the introductions, "This is Trah Bell, and Sha Dup and Bee Qwyatt."

The guys introduced themselves in turn, "This is Stu Pete Lee, Buh B. Grabbs, and Schaem Onyu."

Obviously there was some tension in the air.

Trah Belle, got butterflies in her stomach and ran to the ladies room without saying a word.  Sha Dup and Bee Qwyatt covered for her saying, "If you looking for Trah Belle, you've got Sha Dup and Bee Qwyatt right now."

Schaem Onyu really like Trah Belle and reached for her, but Sha Dup stepped in the way.  Schaem Onyu's hands landed on some mammary glands.  Sha Dup yells, "Shame On you!"

Schaem Onyu, responded in reprisal, "Shut Up! I was looking for Trah Belle!"

Bee Qwyatt wasn't gonna have any of that rude behavior. "You booby grabs, get..."

Buh B. Grabbs responded, "Be quiet, I get not what you say."

Sha Dup, "Stupidly, get your booby grabs hands off!"

Stu Pete Lee, "Bounce her!"

Yes bouncers came by to see what all the commotion is all about...Everyo ne is yelling out names

"What are you all be Shut Up, Be Quiet, Stupidly, Booby Grabs, and Shame On You!  Looking for Trouble?!"

"YES."

 ;D


Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 22, 2015, 09:04:33 PM
Lol sure have a laugh at my expense  ;D

You need a wingman...cuz it looks like you're losing in this battle of the sexes. ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 23, 2015, 06:14:47 AM
Hero... your joke us funny but i had to read it a few times ::)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 23, 2015, 10:57:24 AM
Trah Belle, Sha Dub, and Bee Qwyatt went on blind dates approved by their mom.  So it was a triple date.  They all met at the right location at the right time.  So the introductions go.

The guys asked for the ladies name.

The ladies took turn with the introductions, "This is Trah Bell, and Sha Dup and Bee Qwyatt."

The guys introduced themselves in turn, "This is Stu Pete Lee, Buh B. Grabbs, and Schaem Onyu."

Obviously there was some tension in the air.

Trah Belle, got butterflies in her stomach and ran to the ladies room without saying a word.  Sha Dup and Bee Qwyatt covered for her saying, "If you looking for Trah Belle, you've got Sha Dup and Bee Qwyatt right now."

Schaem Onyu really like Trah Belle and reached for her, but Sha Dup stepped in the way.  Schaem Onyu's hands landed on some mammary glands.  Sha Dup yells, "Shame On you!"

Schaem Onyu, responded in reprisal, "Shut Up! I was looking for Trah Belle!"

Bee Qwyatt wasn't gonna have any of that rude behavior. "You booby grabs, get..."

Buh B. Grabbs responded, "Be quiet, I get not what you say."

Sha Dup, "Stupidly, get your booby grabs hands off!"

Stu Pete Lee, "Bounce her!"

Yes bouncers came by to see what all the commotion is all about...Everyo ne is yelling out names

"What are you all be Shut Up, Be Quiet, Stupidly, Booby Grabs, and Shame On You!  Looking for Trouble?!"

"YES."

 ;D

VH, did you realize you changed one of the females' names?  Sha Dub is different from Sha Dup.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 23, 2015, 11:14:26 AM
ProudLao and Tai Lau were talking and Tai Lau said to ProudLao, "There is an easy way to get what you want." ProudLao said, "How?" Tai Lau replied, "Tell people you know their secret." ProudLao jumps up and runs to his dad, "I know your secret!" His dad replies, "Please don't tell your mom, heres $10." ProudLao then runs to his mom, "I know your secret!" His mom says, "Please don't tell your dad, here's $15." ProudLao then decides to try it out on the mailman, "I know your secret!" The mailman opened his arms and said, "Come, give your dad a hug!"

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 23, 2015, 11:19:19 AM
Hahahaha! Worked in reverse for ProudLao, priceless :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 23, 2015, 11:26:35 AM
You need a wingman...cuz it looks like you're losing in this battle of the sexes. ;D

Nah, grown up don't need no wingman. Leave that to the boys.  ;D I can handle them with ease  ;D


VH, did you realize you changed one of the females' names?  Sha Dub is different from Sha Dup.   ;D    :P

I know lol

ProudLao and Tai Lau were talking and Tai Lau said to ProudLao, "There is an easy way to get what you want." ProudLao said, "How?" Tai Lau replied, "Tell people you know their secret." ProudLao jumps up and runs to his dad, "I know your secret!" His dad replies, "Please don't tell your mom, heres $10." ProudLao then runs to his mom, "I know your secret!" His mom says, "Please don't tell your dad, here's $15." ProudLao then decides to try it out on the mailman, "I know your secret!" The mailman opened his arms and said, "Come, give your dad a hug!"

 ;D

Sorry, my dada is the milkman  ;D maybe you meant VH’s dada  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 23, 2015, 12:44:15 PM
Haven't seen any comebacks for days from PL...  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 23, 2015, 07:35:11 PM
Hahahaha! Worked in reverse for ProudLao, priceless :2funny:

  ;D    ;)

Sorry, my dada is the milkman  ;D maybe you meant VH’s dada  ;D

Milkman....... mailman....... .same difference.      :P

Haven't seen any comebacks for days from PL...  :2funny:

Remember, he's blonde at times so it may take him a while.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 23, 2015, 07:36:54 PM
VH, did you realize you changed one of the females' names?  Sha Dub is different from Sha Dup.   ;D    :P

whooopss...LOL . :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 24, 2015, 08:57:45 AM
whooopss...LOL. :2funny:

That was the funniest part about the joke.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 24, 2015, 12:23:01 PM
As an airplane is about to crash, tRouBLe jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" VH stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 24, 2015, 12:29:47 PM
Not bad , PL.   :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 24, 2015, 12:35:44 PM
Trouble is always being teased by the neighborhood boy, ProudLao, for being stupid. ProudLao's favorite joke is to offer Trouble her choice between a nickel and a dime and she always takes the nickel. One day, after Trouble takes the nickel, another neighbor takes her aside and says, "Trouble, that boy is making fun of you. Don't you know that a dime is worth more than a nickel, even though the nickel's bigger?" Trouble smiles wickedly and says, "Well, if I took the dime, he'd stop doing it, and so far I've made $20!"

 >:D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 24, 2015, 12:40:31 PM
A supervisor was addressing his team of 25 and said: "I have a nice easy job for the laziest person here. Put up your hand if you are the laziest." 24 people raised their hands, and the supervisor asked the last person Giggles_Shyly, "why didn't you raise your hand?" Giggles_Shyly replied: "Too much trouble raising the hand, boss."

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 24, 2015, 12:56:53 PM
LMAO  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 24, 2015, 01:07:05 PM
A supervisor was addressing his team of 25 and said: "I have a nice easy job for the laziest person here. Put up your hand if you are the laziest." 24 people raised their hands, and the supervisor asked the last person Giggles_Shyly, "why didn't you raise your hand?" Giggles_Shyly replied: "Too much trouble raising the hand, boss."

 ;D

LOL...amazing how lazy people always be putting lots of effort into being lazy.  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 24, 2015, 01:15:08 PM
I raised my eyes I bet, good enough for me ;D I broke a sweat raising my eyes ::)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 24, 2015, 01:19:41 PM
that's a lot of sweating just waking up... :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 24, 2015, 01:21:44 PM
Waking up takes a toll on me most days :P beads of sweat form while just thinking of waking up... so there ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 24, 2015, 01:31:57 PM
LOL... :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 26, 2015, 05:56:24 PM
The police and me......  ;D    :D

The police pulling me over
Police: Where do you live?
Me: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live?
Me: With me.
Police: Where do you all live?
Me: Together.
Police: Where is your house?
Me: Next to my neighbor's house.
Police: Where is your neighbor's house?
Me: If I tell you, you won't believe me.
Police: Tell me.
Me: Next to my house...

The police knocking on my door
Me: Who's there?
Police: The Police.
Me: What do you want?
Police: We want to talk.
Me: How many of you are there?
Police: Two.
Me: So talk with each other.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 27, 2015, 08:23:43 AM
So five year old talk there  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 27, 2015, 08:43:21 AM
Better than your baby talk.......ga ga goo goo.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 27, 2015, 08:47:44 AM
ProudLao and Tai Lau are searching for their lost girlfriends.

ProudLao: What does your girlfriend look like?
Tai Lau: She's 5'6, hot, sexy, long black hair, green eyes.  What about yours?
ProudLao: Forget about mine.. lets search for yours.

So typical.  ::)   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 27, 2015, 08:52:35 AM
Tai Lau, VillainousHero, and ProudLao are at a restaurant with their girlfriends. Tai Lau, thinking he is all suave, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the honey?...Honey." Now, VillainousHero, copying Tai Lau, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the sugar?...Sugar." So now, ProudLao is under pressure. He has to come up with something good. After a minute of thinking, he says to his girlfriend, "Pass me the pork...pig."

 ;D    :D

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 27, 2015, 09:49:27 AM
Better than your baby talk.......ga ga goo goo.   ;D

At least I don't enjoy sucking on my own toe.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 27, 2015, 09:50:52 AM
ProudLao and Tai Lau are searching for their lost girlfriends.

ProudLao: What does your girlfriend look like?
Tai Lau: She's 5'6, hot, sexy, long black hair, green eyes.  What about yours?
ProudLao: Forget about mine.. lets search for yours.

So typical.  ::)   ;D

At least I was honest  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 27, 2015, 09:58:59 AM
Tai Lau, VillainousHero, and ProudLao are at a restaurant with their girlfriends. Tai Lau, thinking he is all suave, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the honey?...Honey." Now, VillainousHero, copying Tai Lau, says to his girlfriend, "Could you pass me the sugar?...Sugar." So now, ProudLao is under pressure. He has to come up with something good. After a minute of thinking, he says to his girlfriend, "Pass me the pork...pig."

 ;D    :D

LMAO I need to work on my skill  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 27, 2015, 01:26:39 PM
At least I don't enjoy sucking on my own toe.  ;D

No.  You just like sucking on gons.  Ewwwww....... did I just say that.   ;D    :D

At least I was honest  ;D

Honesty is not always the best policy.    ;D

LMAO I need to work on my skill  ;D

While Tai Lau and VillainousHero asks for something light and sweet......you ask for pork.  You are what you eat.  Oink oink.  Hehehe.     :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 27, 2015, 02:07:38 PM
ProudLao and Tai Lau are searching for their lost girlfriends.

ProudLao: What does your girlfriend look like?
Tai Lau: She's 5'6, hot, sexy, long black hair, green eyes.  What about yours?
ProudLao: Forget about mine.. lets search for yours.

So typical.  ::)   ;D

LOL..I remember this one... :2funny: a different version though.  :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 27, 2015, 02:20:49 PM
 :D ;D

Shocking is the first joke.... I do have my blonde moments :P can't help if the sales person is also a blonde, the blind leading the blind :2funny:

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 27, 2015, 03:01:10 PM
 :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: ROFL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 27, 2015, 03:03:17 PM
I had my blonde moment a few times. Just like that Plasma on University where you donate blood. I once wanted to go there to look at some Plasma and LCD TV.  :2funny: Until I was told that it's a place to donate blood. Well, the sign said "Plasma".  :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 27, 2015, 03:24:32 PM
Oh girl, they would of looked at you weird :D ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 27, 2015, 03:25:29 PM
Oh girl, they would of looked at you weird :D ;D :2funny:

Can you imagine walking inside and asking them "Where are your tv?".
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 27, 2015, 03:26:49 PM
Hahaha  :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 27, 2015, 03:53:48 PM
Tai Lau used to be blonde at one point but girls just don't take him seriously for some odd reason. So he thought if he would become a brunet so perhaps the will be more serious.... So he became a brunet with artificial intelligence.. .. ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 28, 2015, 12:10:52 PM
How does ProudLao take a bubble bath? He eats beans for dinner.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 28, 2015, 12:13:34 PM
A couple, Tai Lau and Giggles_Shyly, were driving down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats and pigs, Tai Lau asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" "Yep," Giggles_Shyly replied, "in-laws."

  :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 28, 2015, 01:09:24 PM
Back fired and burned at the end LOL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 28, 2015, 01:38:21 PM
 :2funny: :2funny: Funny, because someone once said "Oh, look at your family"pointing to all the cows to me. Of course, I was a bit upset.. so I said "You love cow so much that's why you're with me". Mooo mOoo  :P :-\
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 28, 2015, 01:44:25 PM
I do that to my friend all the time when I see cows, and he said, look next door, there is your family.... goats? Unsure what he meant ??? ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 28, 2015, 01:51:54 PM
 :2funny: :2funny: Not sure either...
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 28, 2015, 01:59:02 PM
Maybe I baaaaaa baaaa to much LOL ::) :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on July 28, 2015, 02:00:19 PM
Maybe I baaaaaa baaaa to much LOL ::) :2funny:

 :2funny: :2funny: I was going to say something like that but didn't want to offend you.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 28, 2015, 02:33:05 PM
:2funny: :2funny: I was going to say something like that but didn't want to offend you.

Oh I don't get offended my friend :) unless you say blah blah instead of baaa baaa LOL since I do a lot of blah blah kidding :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 28, 2015, 07:15:39 PM
Facebook jokes.... :D


I want to make a Facebook account and the name will be Nobody so when I see stupid things people post, I can Like it. And it will say Nobody Likes This.


I'm going to change my Facebook name to Benefits. Now, when someone adds me on Facebook, it will say: you are now friends with Benefits.


Some people should consider having multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.


 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 28, 2015, 07:41:36 PM
LOL! HILAROUS!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on July 28, 2015, 07:54:05 PM
LOL done that with online gamer names.... :police:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 29, 2015, 08:22:11 AM
Dating scenario:  :D :2funny:

- Honey, would you like me to bring coffee to the bed?
- No, darling, I will come to have breakfast with you.
- Would you like to have scrambled eggs, my love?
- Sure, kitty, two eggs, please.
- Wait, you don’t remember my name either, do you?

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 29, 2015, 08:24:03 AM
Tai Lau asked his gf:

- Do you think my salary is sufficient for you?
Girlfriend:
- Yes it is sufficient for me, but how you will survive?
 ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 29, 2015, 08:30:09 AM
The policeman stops the driver and says:
- Tai Lau, you won 500 dollars for wearing a safety belt. What will you do with the winning?
- I do not know, probably will pass the exam for a driving license...
Then his friend ProudLao says:
- Do not listen! He always talk like that when he is drunk.
VH from rear wakes up:
- I told you that we won't go far away with the stolen car!
At the same time Darksyde from the trunk:
- Have we already crossed the border?

 :2funny: :2funny:

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 29, 2015, 08:31:29 AM
Tai Lau, very funny but I was away visiting my mother that weekend, I think you were very drunk and mistaken thought VH was me while he kept you company :P ;D :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 29, 2015, 08:53:22 AM
darlin...must have been one your blond moments, remember the lollypop?

Hahaha, I can't recall anything sort of what you are talking about ??? Must be another one of your drunken episode... :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 29, 2015, 09:30:53 AM
Darling, honey, sweetness, sweetie, dear, etc.... drunken tales of forgetfulness :P :D

No wonder! :2funny: :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 29, 2015, 11:46:08 AM
Tai Lau and Giggles_Shyly, you two are just too funny......... .like an old married couple.  :D   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 29, 2015, 11:51:41 AM
A little girl asked her mom Giggles_Shyly, "How did the human race appear?" Giggles_Shyly answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so was all mankind made." Two days later the girl asked her dad Tai Lau the same question. Tai Lau answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved." The confused girl returned to her mom Giggles_Shyly and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and dad said they developed from monkeys?" Giggles_Shyly answered, "Well dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."

  :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 29, 2015, 12:00:55 PM
LOL funny joke Trouble :)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 29, 2015, 04:13:15 PM
Since ProudLao can be a blonde at times, here's how to keep him busy for a couple of days:

Give him a piece of paper that has "please turn over" written on both sides.

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 30, 2015, 05:43:03 AM
Q: What has four arms and an IQ of 60?
















































A: Giggles_Shyly and tRouBLe drinking cheap wine and watching a fashion show

 ;D :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 30, 2015, 07:45:20 AM
I can't see it :(
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 30, 2015, 07:48:12 AM
Tai Lau is driving home one evening, when he suddenly realizes that it's his daughter's birthday and he hasn't bought her a present. He drives to the mall, runs to the toy store, and says to the shop assistant, "How much is that Barbie in the window?" In a condescending manner, she says, "Which Barbie?" She continues, "We have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.00." Tai Lau asks, "Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.00 when all the others are only $19.95?" "That's obvious," the saleslady says. "Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, Ken's boat, Ken's furniture..."

 :D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 30, 2015, 07:51:06 AM
Tai Lau a police officer attempts to stop a car for speeding and ProudLao gradually increases his speed until he's topping 100 mph. ProudLao eventually realizes he can't escape and finally pulls over. Tai Lau approaches the car and says, "It's been a long day and my shift is almost over, so if you can give me a good excuse for your behavior, I'll let you go." ProudLao thinks for a few seconds and then says, "My wife ran away with a cop about a week ago. I thought you might be that officer trying to give her back!"

Men :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 30, 2015, 08:09:00 AM
 ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 30, 2015, 10:36:40 AM
Tai Lau's teenage boy comes home and announces that he wants to marry the girl next door, Jane Jones. Tai Lau takes him aside and says, ‘I’m sorry, son, but years ago I was having an affair with Jane’s mother and I got her pregnant. You can’t marry her because she’s your half-sister.’ A month later his son comes home and announces that he wants to marry a girl up the street, Sarah Smith. Again Tai Lau confesses that he once had an affair with Mrs Smith and that Sarah is in fact another half-sister. A month later the son announces his engagement to Amy Armstrong, but once more Tai Lau confesses that Amy is in fact another of his daughters. His son complains to his mother. ‘Dad’s driving me crazy,’ he says. ‘Every time I fall in love with a girl it turns out she’s one of Dad’s daughters.’ ‘Oh pay no attention to him,’ says his mother. ‘It’s not like he’s your real father.

 :D ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on July 30, 2015, 11:29:08 AM
I can't see it :(

You can't see because there were no pic to begin with  ;D IQ issue? :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 30, 2015, 11:30:54 AM
Omg, I was tricked! >:( ProudLao just you wait >:D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 30, 2015, 07:13:18 PM
 :2funny:    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 30, 2015, 07:18:14 PM
ProudLao was so depressed thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, his savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., that he called the Suicide Lifeline...... .he got a call center in Pakistan.  When he told them he was suicidal, they got really excited and asked if he could drive a truck.    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 30, 2015, 07:44:51 PM
Tai Lau was changing the oil on his wife's car. Suddenly, his wife bursts into the garage. "Careful," she said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more oil! Oh my gosh! You're pouring too much at once. TOO MUCH! Slowly! TURN THE CONTAINER NOW! We need more oil. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE OIL? They're going to overflow! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're changing the oil! Never! Turn it! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to clean the cap. You know you always forget to clean the cap. Use the screw. USE THE SCREW! THE SCREW!" Tai Lau stared at her. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to change the oil?" His wife calmly replies, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."

 ;D   :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 30, 2015, 07:48:53 PM
ProudLao and his many blonde moments.....

“I got a compliment on my driving today,” said ProudLao to his friend, VillainousHero . "There was a note left on my windshield and it said 'parking fine.' "

 :idiot2:   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 31, 2015, 11:01:39 AM
Good ones Trouble :) got me laughing ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 01, 2015, 10:00:47 PM
Tai Lau shook Dr. Giggles_Shyly's hand in gratitude and said, “Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will.” “That is very kind of you,” said Dr. Giggles_Shyly emotionally, and then added, “Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I’d like to make a little change.”

 >:D   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 02, 2015, 01:36:43 PM
ProudLao's type of interview and/or sales.....  ;D

ProudLao was at a job interview today when the manager handed ProudLao his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me." So ProudLao put it under his arm, walked out of the building, and went home. Eventually the manager called ProudLao's mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!" ProudLao said, "$100 and it's yours."
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 03, 2015, 09:04:20 AM
LOL, making sure he lives a LONG TIME, right ;) ;D Trouble!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 04, 2015, 07:54:50 AM
Hahahaha Tai Lau :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 04, 2015, 09:11:33 AM
LOL, making sure he lives a LONG TIME, right ;) ;D Trouble!

 ;D    :D

we're not just best of friends but with benefits...she added viagra to my prescription.  ;)  :-*

 :o    :-X    :D

The story goes...Trouble was married to an Laotian gentleman and they lived in Vientiane, Laos. The poor Hmong lady was not very proficient in Lao, but managed to communicate with her husband.

The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries. One day, Troubles went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs.  She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in desperation, lifted up her skirt to show her thighs.

The butcher got the message and Troubles went home with pork legs. The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts. Again, she didn't know how to say and so she unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breast. Troubles got what she wanted.

The 3rd day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. She brought her husband to the store... >:D :idiot2: :2funny:

 >:(   Me and living in Laos do not mix well.  ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 04, 2015, 09:17:25 AM
Giggles_Shyly is telling Tai Lau to clean up.

What Giggles_Shyly says…
This place is a mess! C’mon!
You and I need to clean up!
Your stuff is lying on the floor!
You’ll have no clothes to wear if we don’t do laundry right now!

What Tai Lau hears…
blah blah blah blah blah C’MON!
YOU AND I blah blah blah blah!
blah blah blah blah ON THE FLOOR!
blah blah blah NO CLOTHES blah blah blah blah blah blah blah RIGHT NOW!

Men!   ::)    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 04, 2015, 09:22:16 AM
ROFLMBO!!!! Isn't that the truth ;D ;D :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 04, 2015, 03:52:33 PM
VH: "If I gave you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2, how many would you have?"
Tai Lau: "Seven."
VHr: "No, listen carefully... If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Tai Lau: "Seven."
VH: "Let me put it to you differently. If I gave you two apples, and another two apples and another two, how many would you have?"
Tai Lau: "Six."
VH: "Good. Now if I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?"
Tai Lau: "Seven!"
VH: "Tai Lau, where in the heck do you get seven from?!"
Tai Lau: "Because I've already got a freaking cat!"
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 05, 2015, 02:05:39 PM
Tai Lau exclaims to his wife one day, "Your butt is getting really big. It's bigger than the BBQ grill!" Later that night in bed, Tai Lau makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. "What's wrong?" he asks. She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?"  ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 05, 2015, 03:03:35 PM
Hahaha, my dream is to hardly work by using my brain :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on August 06, 2015, 07:34:53 AM
ProudLao : My first son just turned 6 last week!
tRouBLe: My first daughter just turned 3 few days ago!
ProudLao : Great! When your daughter 25, my son can marry her!
tRouBLe : No! Look at your son's age currently is 2x my daughter's, so your son will be 50 then!!!
ProudLao :   ::) :D :idiot2: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 06, 2015, 08:57:03 AM
 :o getting morbid in here LOL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on August 06, 2015, 09:11:55 AM
:o getting morbid in here LOL
Do you even know what morbid means?

Maybe I don't.... LOL.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 06, 2015, 09:12:40 AM
Something not normal and unconfortable, usually death but this is morbid to me LOL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 06, 2015, 09:13:10 AM
Sex talk is like death talk to me :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on August 06, 2015, 09:14:10 AM
Mine has nothing to do with that.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on August 06, 2015, 09:17:48 AM
Something not normal and unconfortable, usually death but this is morbid to me LOL
So this is a sickly diseased talking... About sexualized funnier is killing you with laughter...

LOL... You have a very strange notion of morbidity.

Laughing at the expense of another illness...
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 06, 2015, 09:23:59 AM
When I think of sexual conversations, it makes me think of death and rotting flesh LOL makes me uncomfortable to the point where I get up and leave (if in person), on screen I can relatively talk about it to a point but if it gets weirder then I stop responding ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 06, 2015, 10:17:38 AM
if talking about sex is morbid to you...i wonder how it is, if you were actually doing it.   ;D ;D ;D

you should go see my virgin joke in mature sexction...sex y stories.   O0

The second joke was funny Tai lau ;D made me think about sweating right after a hot summer day run! Yea, hand me those towels! Sweating like a faucet :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 06, 2015, 12:48:58 PM
Hmmmm.......I see where some of the jokes are leading to.   :o    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 06, 2015, 12:52:24 PM
Another of ProudLao's blonde moments....   ;D

ProudLao recently bought an A.M. radio. It took him two weeks to figure out that he could play it at night.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 06, 2015, 12:56:15 PM
Tai Lau and alcohol.....   ;D

When he read about the evils of drinking, he gave up reading.

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, FLOOR.

Or would the second one apply to Giggles_Shyly. ...   :D

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 06, 2015, 12:59:26 PM
Hmmmm.......I see where some of the jokes are leading to.   :o    ;D

I know huh Trouble, Tai Lau is telling me he needs a :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 06, 2015, 01:00:02 PM
LMBO Trouble, funny joke :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 06, 2015, 06:50:05 PM
Tai Lau is driving in a car at a constant speed. On his left side is a valley and on his right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as him. In front of him is a galloping pig which is the same size as his car and he cannot overtake it. Behind him is a helicopter flying at ground level. Both the giant pig and the helicopter are also traveling at the same speed as him. What must he do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?      - He needs to not ride the kiddie merry-go-round when he is drunk, so get off!   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 06, 2015, 07:21:15 PM
45 year old ProudLao had a heart attack and was immediately transported to the hospital. While he was in surgery he had a supernatural, near death experience. ProudLao met God and asked him: "Has my time come?" God answered: "No, you have 43 years, 2 months and 8 more days to live." After ProudLao recovered, he decided to stay in the hospital and do plastic surgery on his face, liposuction, and abdominal fat removal. He also called a hair stylist to change his hairstyle and an orthodontist to perform a ‘teeth lifting’. ProudLao figured, if he had so much time in front of him, he should live the best way possible. After his last plastic surgery and not until he had recovered..... .he changed into a new suit with matching shoes, left the hospital, and started walking across the street. Suddenly an ambulance ran him over. While crossing the gates to heaven, he reached God and demanded to know what happened: "You told me I had 43 more years! Why didn’t you save me from the ambulance?" And God answered: "I didn’t recognize you."

 :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 07, 2015, 08:10:25 AM
Hahaha hilarous!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 07, 2015, 08:30:48 AM
Is it cuz men in blue is the cops? Not sure if I get the joke :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 07, 2015, 08:41:45 AM
oHHHHHHHHHHHH LOL!!!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 07, 2015, 09:07:44 AM
GS, were you serious because I thought you were just playing with Tai Lau?    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 07, 2015, 09:09:36 AM
I was like, blue teeth? Hahaha, I really didn't get it at first :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 07, 2015, 09:10:37 AM
Hehehe.  Funny.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 07, 2015, 09:13:33 AM
Friday and of all days I lost my phone, unsure where it is. Stressed thinking of where I last saw it. You can say my mind is elsewhere.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 07, 2015, 05:06:01 PM
oh..she's serious, she's as blond as you are.

you see I had to take her to the doctor yesterday because she had two burnt ears. The doctor asked, “What happened to your ear?”

She replied, “I was ironing and the phone rang. Instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear.

The doctor then asked, “Well, what happened to the other ear?”  she said “You called again!”    :2funny: :idiot2:

Are you implying that the doctor was calling her?  My recollection is that someone else was calling her.   ;D    :P

Friday and of all days I lost my phone, unsure where it is. Stressed thinking of where I last saw it. You can say my mind is elsewhere.

Not only is your phone lost (misplaced?), don't you feel lost without it?   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 07, 2015, 05:12:20 PM
Tai Lau finds his dog with Giggles_Shyly's pet rabbit in its mouth. The rabbit is dead and Tai Lau panics. He takes the dirty, chewed up rabbit into the house. He gives it a bath, blow dries its fur, and puts it back into the cage at Giggles_Shyly's house, hoping that they will think it died of natural causes. A few days later, Giggles_Shyly asks Tai Lau, "Did you hear that Fluffy died?" Tai Lau stammers and says, "Um... no... what happened?" Giggles_Shyly replies, "We found him dead in his cage one day, but the weird thing is that the day after we buried him, someone had dug him up, gave him a bath and put him back into the cage. There are some real sick people out there!"

 ;D   :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 07, 2015, 05:25:24 PM
Good Samaritan?    ???

VillainousHero: Why are you late?
ProudLao: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
VillainousHero: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it?
ProudLao: No, I was standing on it.

I think not.   :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 07, 2015, 05:38:19 PM
Lmbo! Trouble i can see Tai Lau doing that :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 07, 2015, 08:14:16 PM
So can I.    ;D    ;)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Dark Angel on August 08, 2015, 11:29:41 AM
Good Samaritan?    ???

VillainousHero: Why are you late?
ProudLao: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
VillainousHero: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it?
ProudLao: No, I was standing on it.

I think not.   :D

LMAO!!  :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 10, 2015, 10:32:17 AM

Not only is your phone lost (misplaced?), don't you feel lost without it?   ;D

I am lost without my phone even though hardly anyone calls me :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 10, 2015, 02:23:42 PM
you lost your phone on purpose, just so you can't call me   :P  :idiot2:  :knuppel2:

Gimme you #, I will use another source to call you :P hully, hully! >:D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 11, 2015, 01:37:42 PM
My friend Tai Lau thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.

Everything can make anyone cry if you throw it right :P ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 11, 2015, 01:48:23 PM
 ;D ;D ;D you kept saying you wouldn't cry :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 11, 2015, 06:03:47 PM
If the coconut didn't make him cry, did it knock some sense into him....   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 12, 2015, 11:38:25 AM
The difference between pressure, anxiety and panic attacks in Tai Lau's terms....   ;D

He has pressure when his wife is pregnant.
He is anxious when his girlfriend is pregnant.
He has panic attacks when both of them are pregnant!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 12, 2015, 11:39:57 AM
I am sure he yells out" it's not mine" then adds "prove it"! ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 12, 2015, 11:43:43 AM
ProudLao and complimenting do not go well together.

ProudLao goes to a bar and sees a fat girl dancing on a table. He walks over to her and says, "Wow, nice legs!" She is flattered and replies, "You really think so?" ProudLao says, "Oh definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."

 :idiot2:     ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 12, 2015, 11:44:26 AM
I am sure he yells out" it's not mine" then adds "prove it"! ;D :2funny:

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 12, 2015, 11:46:55 AM
LOL good one Trouble, I can surely see ProudLao being misunderstood :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 13, 2015, 01:59:07 PM
ProudLao's explanation on differences between certain terms.....  ;D

ProudLao Jr:  Dad, what's the difference between confident and confidential?
ProudLao:  Hmm. You are my son. Of that I am confident. Your friend, Timmy, is also my son. That's confidential.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 13, 2015, 02:19:49 PM
HAHAHA!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 14, 2015, 09:42:14 AM
Hahaha good ones Tai Lau :P at our expense, never say we didn't PAY our dues towards you ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 14, 2015, 06:40:04 PM
TL and GS, you two are funny.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 14, 2015, 06:51:05 PM
Tai Lau, a student, comes to Professor Giggles_Shyly's office after hours. He glances down the hall, closes the door, and kneels pleadingly. "I would do anything to pass this exam," says Tai Lau. He leans closer to Giggles_Shyly, flips his black hair to the side, and gazes meaningfully into her eyes. "I mean..." he whispers, " I would do.....anythin g." Giggles_Shyly returns Tai Lau's gaze and says, "Anything?" "Anything," replies Tai Lau. Giggles_Shyly voice softens and she says again, "Anything??" Tai Lau responds, "Absolutely anything." Giggles_Shyly whispers, "Would you...study?"

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 14, 2015, 07:00:55 PM
LOL good one O0 got me laughing!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 16, 2015, 01:43:09 PM
Tai Lau and his school days.....  ;D


Tai Lau: Would you punish me for something I didn't do?
Teacher: No, of course not.
Tai Lau: Good, because I didn't do my homework.


Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Tai Lau: No, he did it all by himself.


TL's Mom: What did you do at school today?
Tai Lau: We did a guessing game.
TL's Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam.
Tai Lau: That’s right!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 17, 2015, 08:16:44 AM
Tai Lau asked a Chinese girl for her number. She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" I said, "Wow!" Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."  ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 17, 2015, 08:19:15 AM
Tai Lau and VH were talking. "So, how's your sex life, Tai Lau?"  Vh asked.
"Oh, nothing special. I'm having Social Security sex."  says Tai Lau.
"Social Security sex?"  replied VH.
"Yeah, you know, I get a little each month, but not enough to live on.” sighs Tai Lau.

 :D ;D ::) :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 17, 2015, 08:46:43 AM
LMBO!!!! Tai Lau :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on August 17, 2015, 10:48:40 AM
 ;D :D :2funny:

710...7105.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 17, 2015, 07:08:07 PM
710 = OIL... :idiot2: :idiot2: :2funny:

Honestly, if you hadn't explained it, I wouldn't have understood it.  Hehehe.    ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 17, 2015, 07:13:35 PM
Five friends (Trouble, Giggles_Shyly, ProudLao, Tai Lau, and VillainousHero) were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to go for a picnic and party with some friends up there. They had a great time. However, after all the partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to College until early Monday morning. Rather than taking the final then, they decided to find their professor after the final and explain to him why they missed it. They explained that they had gone to an Old age home in the nearest town to spend some time with aged people for the weekend with the plan to come back and study but, unfortunately, they had a flat tire on the way back, didn't have a spare, and couldn't get help for a long time. As a result, they missed the final. The Professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up the final the following day. The friends were elated and relieved. They studied that night and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them. He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, and told them to begin. They looked at the first problem, worth 5 points. It was the easiest question in their entire syllabus. "Cool," they thought at the same time, each one in her/his separate room. "This is going to be easy." Each finished the problem and then turned the page. On the second page was written: (For 95 points): Which tire?

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 17, 2015, 07:21:11 PM
Trap! Oh man SOL :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 17, 2015, 07:21:40 PM
ProudLao and Tai Lau helping their sons with their homework.....  :D

ProudLao and Tai Lau were chatting outside their sons' school in the morning.  Tai Lau asks, "ProudLao, have you solved your son’s math problems?" "Yes, Tai Lau. I did. Why?" "Can you quickly give them to me, so I can copy them...?" says Tai Lau.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 17, 2015, 07:25:18 PM
Lmbo! Tsk tsk Tai Lau ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 17, 2015, 07:30:52 PM
Another of Tai Lau's mis-learning at school....

Math teacher: If you have 12 chocolates and you give 5 to Mai, 3 to Yer, and 2 to Ka then what will you get?
Tai Lau: 3 new Girlfriends!

 ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 17, 2015, 07:31:40 PM
Lmao :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 18, 2015, 08:24:04 AM
Hahahaha, when you return you will taste something ;) :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 18, 2015, 08:32:00 AM
mmmm...oysters!   :D :-*

 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 18, 2015, 01:52:11 PM
Troubles...I have a secret.

Somebody here in PH said you sounded like an owl and they know you very well.

I'm not falling for that trick.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 18, 2015, 01:55:59 PM
mmmm...oysters!   :D :-*

na,,babe...I didn't go fishing as stated before.  I went to placed some flowers on the grave of my dearly departed friend (it was his bday, yesterday) and as I started back toward my car when my attention was diverted to ProadLao, kneeling at a grave. He seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, "Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?" I approached him and said, "Ey homie, I don't wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I've ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?" He took a moment to collect himself and replied, "My wife, Trouble's first husband."

Are you implying that ProudLao's wife was my first husband?    ???    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 18, 2015, 01:57:18 PM
I'm tellin, you...he's gonna be exposing some secrets about you...somethin g something, seeing you a stargate.   :D ;D

You're not going to get me to say it.  Hehehe.    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 18, 2015, 02:02:58 PM
Tai Lau's attitude at different school levels....   ;D

Teacher: I will call your parents!:
Elementary School:  No! I’ll be a good boy!
Junior High School:  Pffff… Anyway…
High School:  Send my parents my greetings!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 18, 2015, 02:05:22 PM
gosh, blondie...you're PL's wife, and he sobbing over your first husband!   :D ;D

No.  I read it as Trouble's first husband, my wife.   ;D    :D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 20, 2015, 12:10:07 PM
as you can tell...someone went to school...you know I did.   :D ;D

I saw what you did.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 20, 2015, 12:35:10 PM
 ;D ;D ;D Trouble!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 20, 2015, 12:41:33 PM
During a visit to the mental asylum, Tai Lau asked Director Giggles_Shyly what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionali zed. “Well,” said Giggles_Shyly, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.” “Oh, I understand,” said Tai Lau. “A normal person would use the bucket because it’s bigger than the spoon or the teacup.” “No.” said Giggles_Shyly, “A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a room with or without a view?"

 ;D

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 20, 2015, 01:10:15 PM
During a visit to the mental asylum, Tai Lau asked Director Giggles_Shyly what the criterion was which defined whether or not a patient should be institutionali zed. “Well,” said Giggles_Shyly, “we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to the patient and ask him or her to empty the bathtub.” “Oh, I understand,” said Tai Lau. “A normal person would use the bucket because it’s bigger than the spoon or the teacup.” “No.” said Giggles_Shyly, “A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a room with or without a view?"

 ;D

I would so commit Tai Lau without blinking :P :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 20, 2015, 01:37:12 PM
i would have no problems going neither...I don't mind being washed, dressed by hot nurses who would spank me for being bad!  :P :D ;D

And when I visit, I would say: Thaum laus es, puas nyob zoo thiab na :P you would have the biggest grin i bet  ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 20, 2015, 01:42:57 PM
I would answer: "koj niam es...aib pog plaub hau daj ntawv, muab kuv xyuas ta mav, xwb os!"   O0 O0

Hahaha! Xyuas tag ces tsis muaj chaw xyuas lawm... it would be the end to you thuam laus es LOL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 21, 2015, 08:02:33 AM
Hahaha.  You two are so silly.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 21, 2015, 08:22:01 AM
If ProudLao and Tai Lau were in class together   :idiot2:    ;D

Teacher: ProudLao, go to the map and find North America.
ProudLao: Here it is!
Teacher: Correct. Now, Tai Lau, who discovered America?
Tai Lau: ProudLao did!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on August 21, 2015, 08:26:48 AM
Tai Lau tells Giggles_Shyly that he has a crush on his teacher.  Giggles_Shyly says, "Man, that is disgusting."  Tai Lau replies, "What? Everyone has a crush on their teacher." Giggles_Shyly says, "Yeah, but you’re home-schooled."

 :o    :D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 21, 2015, 08:31:03 AM
Hahaha Tai Lau keeps things in the FAMILY, I see :D ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 25, 2015, 12:47:13 PM
LMBO such a hate ;D ;Dr ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 25, 2015, 12:57:02 PM
Lol morbid joke... :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on August 25, 2015, 02:27:29 PM
Hahahaha Tai Lau!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on September 01, 2015, 07:43:47 AM
DMV: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed?
tRouBLe: Make eye contact and wave “hello” if he/she is cute.


 :2funny: :D :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on September 01, 2015, 10:22:42 AM

Giggles decided to prepare her will and make her final requests. She told her rabbi she had two final requests. First, she wanted to be cremated, and second, she wanted her ashes scattered in Bloomingdales.

"Bloomingdales!" the rabbi exclaimed. "Why Bloomingdales?"

"It's the only way I can be sure tRouBLe will visit me twice a week."

 ;D :D :P

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on September 01, 2015, 10:26:13 AM
tRouBLe and Giggles met for the first time since graduating from high school. tRouBLe asked Giggles, "You were always so organized in school, did you manage to live a well planned life?"

"Oh yes," said her friend. "My first marriage was to a millionaire; my second marriage was to an Asian actor name Tai Lau; ,my third marriage was to a preacher; and now I'm married to an undertaker."

tRouBLe asked, "What do those marriages have to do with a well planned life?"
 "One for the money, two for the show. three to get ready and four to go."

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on September 01, 2015, 10:46:05 AM
Lmao ProudLao :knuppel2: :knuppel2: :knuppel2: :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on September 02, 2015, 09:55:40 AM
PL married and had 13 children. When his wife died, he married again and had 7 more children. Again, his wife died so PL remarried and this time had 5 more children. Alas, he finally died. Standing before his coffin, the preacher prayed for him. He thanked the Lord for this very loving man and said, "Lord, they're finally together." One mourner leaned over and quietly asked his friend, "Do you think he means his first, second or third wife?" The friend replied, "I think he meant his legs."

 >:D    ;D
Troubles married and had 13 children.  When her husband died, she married again and had 7 more children.  Again, her husband died. So Troubles remarried and this time had 5 more children.  Alas, she finally died.
Standing before her coffin, the preacher prayed for her.  He thanked the Lord for this very loving woman and said, Lord, the'yre finally together. ProadLao leaned over and quietly asked me, "Do you think he means her first, second or third husband?"  I replied, "I think he means her legs."   :D ;D

I like my version better.   ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on September 02, 2015, 10:03:09 AM
Giggles_Shyly:  What do you call a man in an institute of higher learning?
trouble:  A visitor.

 ;D
Trouble, I told you someone was talking about you... :P

Me: What do you call a blonde in an institute of higher learning?
Giggles: A visitor

Mine was funnier and I'm sure GS would agree too.   >:D    ;D

Was the person talking about me you?   :D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on September 02, 2015, 10:10:54 AM
ProudLao and Tai Lau work together in an office. ProudLao always has a jar of peanuts on his desk, and Tai Lau really loves peanuts. One day, while ProudLao was away from his desk, Tai Lau yields to temptation and scarfs down over half of the contents of the jar. When ProudLao returns, Tai Lau feels guilty and confesses to his crime. "Don't worry, Tai Lau. I never eat the peanuts anyway," ProudLao replies. "Since I lost my teeth, all I can do is gum chocolate off the M&M's."

 ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on September 02, 2015, 11:08:58 AM
LMAO  ;D ;D TL was it plain or gummy flavor   :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on September 02, 2015, 11:25:27 AM
Tai Lau sits down at the bar and orders drink after drink.

 "Is everything okay, pal?" Giggles asks.

 "My wife tRouBLe and I got into a fight, and she said she isn't talking to me for a month!"

 Trying to put a positive spin on things, Giggles says, "Well, maybe that's kind of a good thing. You know, a little peace and quiet?"

 "Yeah, but today is the last day!

 ;D :D

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on September 02, 2015, 02:45:42 PM
LOL PL!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on September 02, 2015, 03:03:47 PM
Trouble I so agree with you! O0
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on September 03, 2015, 01:53:06 PM
What are you two agreeing on?
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on September 09, 2015, 09:48:23 AM
What are you two agreeing on?

My version was funnier.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on September 09, 2015, 09:51:15 AM
If Giggles_Shyly and Tai Lau were coworkers..... .

Tai Lau: Can you help me with this project?
Giggles_Shyly: The short answer is no.
Tai Lau: What's the long answer?
Giggles_Shyly: Nooooooo.


 :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on September 09, 2015, 09:53:48 AM
ProudLao went to see the doctor to get the results of his brain scan. The doctor said: "ProudLao, I have some bad news for you. First, we have discovered that your brain has two sides: the left side and the right side." ProudLao interrupted, "Well, that’s normal, isn’t it? I thought everybody had two sides to their brain?" The doctor replied, "That’s true, ProudLao. But your brain is very unusual because on the left side there isn’t anything right, while on the right side there isn’t anything left."


 ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on September 21, 2015, 10:54:47 PM
Tai Lau took his girlfriend to McDonald's, backed his car through the drive-through window, so the cashier could be on her side and told her: "You can order anything from the dollar menu, don't ever say i didn't let you have what you want again!"

 ::) :P ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on September 22, 2015, 07:20:44 AM
LMBO Tai Lau I can see you doing that :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 23, 2015, 04:56:08 PM
Old people at weddings always poke me and say "you're next."  So I started saying the same thing to them at funerals.

Next time, when you're at a restaurant and the hostess asks you, "would you like a table?"  Respond with, "No, not at all.  I came here to eat on the floor."

 :D    ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on October 24, 2015, 06:34:08 AM
Common sense is very uncommon...
Logical people are always being questioned...
Wisdom is only understood after the fact...
Foolishness is always thought of before the fact...
YOLO... You only live once, and who lives twice?
Experience... Is repeating the same mistakes made again, and remembering it right afterwards...
Methodical people are called crazy or mad.

 :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on November 16, 2015, 10:12:52 AM
A teacher was working with a group of children, trying to broaden their horizons through sensory perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavers and said, "Children, I'd like you to close your eyes and taste these." The kids easily identified the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavers, all of the kids were stumped. I'll give you a hint," said the teacher.  "It's something your mommy probably calls your daddy all the time." Instantly, Little Johnny coughed his onto the floor and shouted, "Quick!  Spit'em out!  They're dogs!"

 :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: proudlao on November 18, 2015, 10:37:51 AM
One day the teacher wanted the class to use the word definitely in a sentence.  Giggles_Shyly raised her hand first thinking she’s so smart, so the teacher called on her.

Giggles_Shyly said, "The sky is definitely blue!"

"I'm sorry Giggles_Shyly that’s wrong the sky sometimes turns different colors red, gray etc.. anybody else?"

VH raised his hand and said, "The grass is definitely green."

"I'm sorry VH that's not true either, sometimes the grass dies and it may turn brown, anybody else?"

tRouBLe raises her hand and says, "Teacher do farts have lumps?"

The teacher says, "no why?"

tRouBLe says, "Then I definitely Shit my pants!"
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: lilly on December 08, 2015, 04:03:57 PM
Q: What did the mushroom say to the fungus?
A: You're a fun guy [fungi].
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on December 15, 2015, 08:18:21 AM
A girl at the bar asked for Tai Lau's number. He said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" surprised and confused, she said, "Wow?!" Then his friend said, "He means 666-3629."

 :2funny: :2funny: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on December 15, 2015, 08:24:41 AM
I met up with Tai Lau and he told me his story: Why did I get divorced, you ask? Well, last week was my birthday. My wife didn't wish me a happy birthday. My parents forgot and so did my kids. I went to work and even my colleagues didn't wish me a happy birthday. As I entered my office, my secretary said, "Happy birthday, boss!" I felt so special. She asked me out for lunch. After lunch, she invited me to her apartment. We went there and she said, "Do you mind if I go into the bedroom for a minute?" "Okay," I said. She came out 5 minutes later with a birthday cake, my wife, my parents, my kids, my friends, & my colleagues all yelling, "SURPRISE!!!" while I was waiting on the sofa... naked.

Not all surprises are happy ones :P  :D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on December 15, 2015, 08:28:27 AM
 :2funny:  Funny, ladies!   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on December 15, 2015, 09:34:04 AM
Hahaha IDK, it might be the other way around :D :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 22, 2016, 08:34:12 AM
Funny.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 04, 2016, 09:40:53 AM
LOL!!! Awww, someone misses me :P


Ordinarily Tai Lau goes about his day, staring at women in the parks and has been caught doing it several time, some people even would call it creepy, but he learned a few tricks and  spread his attention across many individuals, then it's just "people watching".

So now, when I stare at a good looking guy, I "people watch", and if I get caught, i say, Tai Lau taught me how to people watch as a hobby :P :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 05, 2016, 08:09:04 AM
LOL!!! ::) :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 07, 2016, 09:09:04 AM
 :2funny: Tai Lau, too funny!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 07, 2016, 09:10:47 AM
I’ve given up social media for the New Year and am trying to make friends outside Facebook and PH while 
applying the same principles. Every day, I walk down the street and tell passersby what I’ve eaten, how I feel, what I did the night before, and what I will do tomorrow. Then I give them pictures of my family, my dog, and me gardening. I also listen to their conversations and tell them I love them. And it works. I already have followers, more stalkers than most but nevertheless followers :P :P

 ;D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 07, 2016, 10:40:00 AM
This is such a tease for lions :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :D :D :D :D :D

(http://i1274.photobucket.com/albums/y424/NoBodyU_Know/bait_zpsqpijpsq4.jpg)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 22, 2016, 12:38:47 PM
This is such a tease for lions :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :2funny: :D :D :D :D :D

(http://i1274.photobucket.com/albums/y424/NoBodyU_Know/bait_zpsqpijpsq4.jpg)

This is funny.   ;D

Sorry, folks of PH...In case some of you are looking for Troubles... feeling kind of bad,  I told the blond girls of PH to log off and they seem to be having issues logging back on.  that's why they've been missing.   :P :2funny:

Hehehe.  Dork.   :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 25, 2016, 08:08:55 AM
 ;D  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 25, 2016, 08:12:47 AM
Tai Lau goes to the doctor with burns on both of his ears and his right hand. "Sit down and tell me how it happened," says the doctor.
"I was ironing my clothes when I received a call. Instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and burned my ear."
"'What about the other ear and your hand?" the doctor asked.
He replied, "I tried to call for an ambulance."

Tai Lau, think before you do things ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 25, 2016, 08:53:47 AM
 ::) ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 25, 2016, 09:04:39 AM
 ;D yes who pushed in me! :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 27, 2016, 10:57:25 AM
You two are funny.   ;D   :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 28, 2016, 07:31:38 AM
Tai Lau isn’t happy with 
how things are going in court, so he gives the judge a hard time.

Judge: “Where do you work?”

Tai Lau: “Here and there.”

Judge: “What do you do for 
a living?”

Tai Lau: “This and that.”

Judge: “Take him away.”

Tai Lau: “Wait; when will I get out?”

Judge: “Sooner or later.”


Tai Lau walks to a bar and asked the first girl he saw if she can call him.
She replied, yes I can, someday. :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 28, 2016, 08:38:15 AM
LOL!  ;D funny indeed!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 28, 2016, 12:01:01 PM
So Giggles went to see the dentist and doctor the same day?   ???  Sounds like she had to see the doctor after having to spend time with the dentist (TL)........I guess anyone would.   :idiot2:   ;D    :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 28, 2016, 12:53:29 PM
Yeah Tai Lau does give people mental blocks :P ::)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 29, 2016, 07:47:37 AM
Tai Lau and a woman are sleeping together when suddenly there is a noise in the house, and the woman rolls over and says, "It's my husband, you have to leave!" Tai Lau jumps out of bed, jumps through the window, crawls through the bushes, and out on the street, when he realizes something. He goes back to the house and says to the woman, "Wait, I'm your husband!" She replies giving him a dirty look, "So why did you run?"

 :knuppel2: :knuppel2: :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 29, 2016, 11:40:16 AM
Tai Lau's observations: As a single, never-married man in my 40s, I have been questioned endlessly about my status by friends, relatives and co-workers. Over the years I’ve noticed a subtle change in the nature of their inquiries.

In my teens, friends would ask, “Who are you going out with this weekend?”

In my 20s, relatives would say, “Who are you dating?”

In my 30s, co-workers might inquire, “So, are you dating anyone?”

Now people ask, “Where did you get that manly wallet?”
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on April 29, 2016, 12:22:05 PM
 :knuppel2: :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 02, 2016, 12:01:34 PM
Maybe TL is really the blonde out of all of us....   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 04, 2016, 10:59:24 AM
Tai Lau driving home from a late night gig. Feeling tired, he pulls into a local store for some coffee. While waiting to pay, he remembers that he locked his car doors but left the accordion in plain view on the back seat of his car! He rushes out only to realize that he is too late. The back window of his car was smashed and somebody had already thrown in two more accordions.

 ;D  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 04, 2016, 11:11:53 AM
 :2funny:

Kuv yog nws mas ntseg kuv tu siab heev :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 04, 2016, 11:18:52 AM
 ::) :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 04, 2016, 11:25:37 AM
 :2funny: I bet she came into Ai Sunya's office with shades 8) O0
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 04, 2016, 07:11:33 PM
Tai Lau driving home from a late night gig. Feeling tired, he pulls into a local store for some coffee. While waiting to pay, he remembers that he locked his car doors but left the accordion in plain view on the back seat of his car! He rushes out only to realize that he is too late. The back window of his car was smashed and somebody had already thrown in two more accordions.

 ;D  :2funny:

That was funny!   ;D   :D

We know how much Troubles likes to drink.  She was such a habitual drinker that even she was finally convinced that she was an alcoholic . At her best friend, Giggles' urging she went to see Ai Sunya, a psychiatrist. After a lengthy consultation, Ai Sunya sternly ordered that hereafter, every time Troubles got drunk she was to report her transgression the very next day. A few days later, Troubles staggered into Ai Sunya's office. “I wanna report that I wash drunk last night,” she mumbled. “For heaven’s sake, woman, you’re drunk right now! ”cried Ai Sunya. “Yeah, I know,” said Troubles, “but I’m gonna report this tomorrow.”   :idiot2: :D ;D

Silly.  Hehehe.   :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 04, 2016, 07:16:24 PM
When I see lovers' names carved in a tree, I don't think it's sweet. I just think it's surprising how many people bring a knife on a date.

 :o  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 04, 2016, 07:20:06 PM
Remember this ladies:

When a guy says he likes girls with a sense of humor, he doesn't mean that he wants a girl to be really witty and funny. He means he wants her to laugh at his jokes.

 ::)   ;D

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 04, 2016, 07:26:00 PM
Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'

She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'

 :2funny:   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 04, 2016, 07:35:34 PM
 :2funny: funny tRouBLe
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 05, 2016, 12:29:27 PM
If someone ever says, “What are you staring at?”
Say “I don't know, give me a minute.”

I can see someone from here doing this ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 05, 2016, 12:36:18 PM
A drunk stumbles out of a bar one night and passes a woman walking her dog. The man stops her and asks, "Hey where'd ya get the pig?" The woman replies, "Listen you drunken bastard, that's a dog not a pig." The man then said, "Take it easy, I was talking to the dog"

I haven't met someone who is drunk enough to talk to animals yet, might be a good thing :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 05, 2016, 12:48:40 PM
Hmmmm.......my spider sense tells me TL falls in both those categories.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 05, 2016, 12:56:32 PM
Tai Lau's pickup lines:

Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again?

Does this cloth also smell like chloroform to you?

Hey, did you buy those pants on sale, because at my place they're 100% off.

Beware, ladies.   ;D   :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 05, 2016, 01:10:08 PM
HAHAHA tRouBLe! ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 06, 2016, 07:45:57 AM
I don't recall being much of a blond LOL but once in a blue moon, my mind goes blank. Only happens when someone give me a hard enough question to make me think. :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 09, 2016, 08:38:28 AM
Tai Lau relocates to LA and writes home to his parents to tell them he is doing great and the move was successful. He says the city is fast and furious with lots of things to do, but the only thing he doesn't understand is the people. People are so backwards in Hollywood. Like, they take drugs right out in the open, but they eat in the closet.
He tells his mom the whole eating in the closet is challenging.

 ;D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 09, 2016, 09:42:21 AM
Hey now, push-up bras are challenging :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 09, 2016, 10:05:12 AM
 ??? says who? LOL, not me :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 10, 2016, 10:29:13 AM
Friends are everlasting and a good source of comfort O0

"Friends forever", as many have put it LOL
 :hello: :wav:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 10, 2016, 11:06:19 AM
Ntxim yuav mag :knuppel2: :knuppel2:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on May 22, 2016, 06:48:12 PM
We're not that blonde........ sounds more like you TL.  Refer to Giggles' jokes.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 31, 2016, 09:24:11 AM
I suspect that someone went into hiding :P TrouBle, and since we are still here, it's the other person(s) LOL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 31, 2016, 09:27:04 AM
A drunk guy is walking down the street. He sees this nun, runs up and knocks her over. He says, "You don't feel so tough now, do you, Batman!?"

 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on May 31, 2016, 09:36:59 AM
How about this:

I've never understood the concept of the gift certificate from Target because for the same $50 bucks, Jane could've gotten me $50 bucks. So instead of giving me cash and giving me the free roam of purchasing items from anywhere, I can only go to Target :D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 03, 2016, 09:28:17 AM
I suspect that someone went into hiding :P TrouBle, and since we are still here, it's the other person(s) LOL

 :2funny:   :-X    ;D    :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on June 27, 2016, 09:17:27 AM
New drivers! :D :D :D :D :2funny:

My sister didn’t do as well on her driver’s-ed test as she’d hoped. 
It might have had something to 
do with how she completed this 
sentence: “When the ______ is dead, the car won’t start.”

My sister answered "driver", LOL!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 27, 2016, 07:32:56 PM
Funny......it is true though.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 28, 2016, 06:43:20 AM
Lwgdlej, you're funny.  There is really no correct answer since it's a joke.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on June 30, 2016, 08:12:59 PM
No, you're not......just funny.   ;D  ;)
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on July 01, 2016, 08:07:44 AM
To surprise her husband, an executive's wife stopped by his office.
When she opened the door, she found him with his secretary sitting in his lap.
Without hesitating, he dictated, "And in conclusion, gentlemen, budget cuts or no budget cuts, I cannot continue to operate this office with just one chair."

 :2funny: :2funny: what does a person do in this case? NOTHING.....
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on July 06, 2016, 01:11:30 PM
Hmmmmm.......I should try that.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 03, 2017, 06:29:16 PM
This is my kind of doctor.   ;D

Doctor:  I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live.
Patient: What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!
Doctor:  Nine...
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 03, 2017, 07:09:09 PM
More jokes, sis! I needed it. Lolz  I almost had a heart attack earlier while crossing the street because I was struck by lightning. Love the rain but hate lightning and thunder storms.  😉

Must be warm where you're at, because it was so cold here.  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 03, 2017, 07:12:28 PM
This is so Ai Sunya.....

"I heard women love a man in uniform.  Can't wait to start working at McDonald's."

 ;D   :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on January 12, 2017, 11:36:47 AM
We need a laugh today since PH is a bit slow:

A little Native American boy asks his chief how babies in their tribe get their names.
The chief replies, "When a baby is born, the father takes him outside of the tee-pee, holds him over his head, and names him after the first thing he sees - like 'Running-Wolf' or 'Flying-Cloud'. Why do you ask, Two-Dogs-Jumping?"
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: lilly on January 13, 2017, 04:00:11 PM
We need a laugh today since PH is a bit slow:

A little Native American boy asks his chief how babies in their tribe get their names.
The chief replies, "When a baby is born, the father takes him outside of the tee-pee, holds him over his head, and names him after the first thing he sees - like 'Running-Wolf' or 'Flying-Cloud'. Why do you ask, Two-Dogs-Jumping?"

 :2funny:  :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: lilly on January 13, 2017, 04:07:27 PM
One evening a father overheard his son saying his prayers   "God bless Mommy,   Daddy and Grammy.   Goodbye Grampa."

Well,  the father thought it was strange,   but he soon forgot about it.   The next day,  the Grandfather died.

A month later the father heard his sony saying prayers again:   "God bless Mommy.  God bless Daddy.  Goodbye Grammy."   The next day the grandmother died.   Well,  the father was getting more than a little woried about the whole situation.

One week later,  the father once again overheard his sons prayers.   "God Bless Mommy.  Good bye Daddy."

This nearly gave the father a heart attack.  He didn't say anything but he got up early to go to work,   so that he would miss the traffic.   He stayed all through lunch and dinner.   Finally after midnight he went home.   He was still alive!   When he got home he appologised to his wife.   "I am sorry Honey.  I had a very bad day at work today."

"You think you've had a bad day?   YOU THINK YOU'VE HAD A BAD DAY!?"   the wife yelled,   "The mailman dropped dead on my doorstep this morning!"
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 13, 2017, 06:54:00 PM
Funny, GS and Lilly!   :2funny:  ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on January 17, 2017, 09:14:41 AM
Signs of aging :2funny:

Another sign of getting older just started happening to me. Driving down the highway, I saw my blinker was on. I don't remember putting that thing on. I had no idea how long it had been on for. You suddenly realize, 'I'm the guy I used to hate to be behind.'
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on January 20, 2017, 10:33:25 AM
Signs of aging :2funny:

Another sign of getting older just started happening to me. Driving down the highway, I saw my blinker was on. I don't remember putting that thing on. I had no idea how long it had been on for. You suddenly realize, 'I'm the guy I used to hate to be behind.'

Ok.  I admit, it's happened to me before.......b ut......but... ....it's only cause I'm preoccupied with concentrating on the road. ;D  :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Gucci K on February 02, 2017, 10:17:07 AM
Ok.  I admit, it's happened to me before.......b ut......but... ....it's only cause I'm preoccupied with concentrating on the road. ;D  :D
Troubles and their identity crisis...did you know that one of you is crazy?  if you look at the other one and she seems normal, guess who's the crazy one!  :2funny: :2funny:


Giggles' daughter was giving her a tea party.  She brought her a cup of 'tea' filled with water, of course.  After several cups of tea, Tou (her husband) came home.  Giggles made him wait in the living room to watch her little princess bring her a cup of 'tea', because it was 'just the cutest thing'.  Daddy waited and sure enough, she came down the hall with a cup of tea for mommy.  He watched her drink it up and said, "you know, the only place she can reach for water is the toilet?!?" 


Ladies...bikin i season is just around the corner, sadly Dairy Queen is closer...let me get you guys some Vanilla shakes.   :-* :-*
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on February 02, 2017, 12:02:28 PM
 :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Gucci K on February 08, 2017, 08:27:57 AM
GS has been having a lot of TrouBles lately about homosexuality. she don't know why; she just have them.
For a long time, she thought maybe one of her roommates, Lilly, was lesbian. So finally, last night, when Lilly asked her to slow dance naked with her in the strobe light...
GS asked, 'Hey girl, are you a lesbian?'
and Lilly said, 'No.'
GS said, 'Let's dance!' 


Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on February 08, 2017, 08:36:50 AM
 :D :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on February 10, 2017, 10:03:30 AM
Why did the fish blush???

BECAUSE it saw the ocean's bottom ;D


Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on February 10, 2017, 10:03:48 AM
A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. Her husband asks, "Why are you so happy?" The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five year old woman, I have the breasts of a eighteen year old." "Oh yeah?" quipped her husband, "What did he say about your forty-five year old ass?" She said, "Your name never came up in the conversation."

 :P :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on February 21, 2017, 01:41:56 PM
You two can be very entertaining.   ;D  :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Gucci K on February 23, 2017, 08:49:28 AM
I never knew why GS collects cans, now I know why...

If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you would have $49.00 today.
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you would have $33.00 today.
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Pebhmong one year ago, you would have $0.00 today.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for recycling refund, you would have received a $215.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg.

drink up!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Gucci K on February 23, 2017, 10:10:51 AM
someone was talking about "urge" to me.

A Ms. Niam Nkauj Ntsuab approached me and said she had the biggest urge to get laid, she's been horny since her separation from her boyfriend, and needs it badly.  She asked if I was free and available?  Excited and happy to obliged, I answered, " yes, of course!"  she replied, "great, please come over tonight at 7"  I said, "oh yea, 7 is perfect!" then she continued, "I need you to pick up and watch, Charlene!"  Charlene was her dog!   :knuppel2:  >:( :idiot2: :knuppel2:


the next day and still bitter for being set up, I decided to charge her for my time!

me:  >:( ....Ntsuab, I'm sorry, but I will have to charge you for watching your dog!  you had the chance to pick her up after one hour, it's gonna cost you $100!

Ntsuab: well, i did call but you didn't answer.

me:  >:( >:(  ...well, you know what? I'm gonna charge you $300 bucks now, because I had to keep her all night and I didn't get laid.

Ntsuab: well, mister!  you owe me $500, you had the chance with Charlene and you didn't!

...I instantly had the urge to kill her, but died of a heart attack! 
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on February 23, 2017, 10:33:52 AM
LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone has urges to a certain degree. but chooses to be :-X about it :D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on February 24, 2017, 12:49:54 PM
I never knew why GS collects cans, now I know why...

If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Delta Airlines one year ago, you would have $49.00 today.
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in AIG one year ago, you would have $33.00 today.
If you had purchased $1,000 of shares in Pebhmong one year ago, you would have $0.00 today.

But, if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the aluminum cans for recycling refund, you would have received a $215.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment plan is to drink heavily & recycle. It is called the 401-Keg.

drink up!

Actually, she would gain $215 and a beer gut.   ;D  :D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: ProudLao on March 07, 2017, 07:49:49 AM
An American wannabe blond woman lay awkwardly sprawled across three entire seats in the movie theater. When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to this funny looking Asian woman, "Sorry, but you’re only allowed one seat." she didn’t budge. The usher became more impatient, "Hey, if you don’t get up from there I’m going to have to call my manager." Once again, she just muttered and did nothing. The usher marched briskly back up the aisle, and in a moment, he returned with the manager. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move her, but with no success. Finally, they summoned Ai Sunya. Ai Sunya surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right what’s your name?" "tRouBLe," she moaned. "Where you from, tRouBLe?" asked Ai Sunya. With a terrible strain in her voice, and without moving, tRouBLe replied;

"The balcony"…..

 :D ;D :2funny:
Klutzy tRouBLe
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on March 07, 2017, 07:58:45 AM
 :2funny:  I admit.....agai nst my better judgment.....t hat was a good one.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: ProudLao on March 30, 2017, 06:56:50 AM
tRouBLe goes to the Doctor, worried about her boyfriend's temper.

The Doctor asks: "What's the problem?"

tRouBLe: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every day my boyfriend seems to lose his temper for no reason. It scares me."

The Doctor says: "I have a cure for that. When it seems that your boyfriend is getting angry, just take a glass of water and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow it until he either leaves the room or calms down."

Two weeks later tRouBLe comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn.

tRouBLe: "Doctor that was a brilliant idea! Every time my boyfriend started losing it, I swished with water. I swished and swished, and he calmed right down! How does a glass of water do that?"

The Doctor says: "The water itself does nothing. It's keeping your mouth shut that does the trick."
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on March 31, 2017, 01:12:10 PM
So what are you really trying to say......   ::)  :P
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: ProudLao on September 28, 2017, 06:46:12 AM
The room was full of pregnant women with their husbands.

The instructor said, "Ladies, remember that exercise is good

for you. Walking is especially beneficial - strengthens the

pelvic muscles and will make delivery that much easier. Just

pace yourself, make plenty of stops and try to stay on a soft surfaces,

like a grass path."

"Gentlemen, remember -- you're in this together. It wouldn't

hurt you to go walking with her. In fact, that shared experience

would be good for you both."

The room suddenly became very quiet as the men absorbed this
information. After a few moments a man, name unknown,
at the back of the room, slowly raised his hand.

"Yes?" said the Instructor.

"I was just wondering: Would it be all right if she carries a golf bag?"
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on October 19, 2017, 02:10:30 PM
So typical of men   :2funny:
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on June 19, 2019, 03:49:18 AM
Asians have it tough in America.

You go to school and they tell everyone to use English to punch u Asians

You got to the bank and they take your money and say Fluct U Asians.

You buy anything and they hit you with Attacks Asians.

You play online games and everyone is pk pk pk..Eliminate Asians.

It's all true.  There's solid evidence to support all of this.  This Obese America loves us.  Loves to make us In Fat you Asians.

thank you thank you.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on June 19, 2019, 10:00:40 PM
What happens when you put Moo and ouch together?

Cow Ouch
couch!

What happens when you mix a punch to the kisser and ouch together?

Pow Ouch
Pouch!

What happens when you get an ouch and it grows bigger and bigger?

Grow Ouch
Grouch!

What happens when your ouch starts to slow down?
Slow Ouch
Slouch!
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 12, 2020, 01:41:13 PM
bar joke: Mayans, Inca's, Aztecs...

History teaches us why these great civilizations went extincted...Me n were only in power in the last 2000+ years. Before that, women ruled as goddesses of fertility for like 200,000 years...yet.

May Ends
I Can'ts
Ass Tights

They were all destined to fail.

Imagine if they were.

My Ins
In Cans
Tight Asses

Women, they would still be in power today...LOL
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: tRouBLe on April 14, 2020, 07:46:40 PM
Thanks for sharing, VH.   ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 18, 2020, 12:53:34 PM
He - How I got my name Justin Credible. I was named after my three uncles. Justin, Grady, and Bill . You've met them.

She - How I got my name Kimpossible was that I was named after my aunts.

He - I met both of your aunts. Kim and Bille, Bille was the cat lady aunt. So that how it was Kim Pussy Bille.

She - No...You've met my Korean aunt Kim and my English aunt Bille was her nickname for Sybil. You haven't met my Hmong aunt Pa.  Kim Pa Sybil.
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on April 24, 2020, 05:22:48 AM
Obviously Obliviously
Obliviously Obviously


Me: We Men are obliviously...
She: Obviously
Me: No...oblivious ly
She: Women Know...obvious ly.

Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on December 16, 2021, 11:05:37 PM
Only for ice fishing men.

Two guys were ice fishing.  The game warden came up to them to check for fishing licenses.  One guy drops his rod and takes off running.  The game warden started to chase him down.  He ran and ran and ran all the way to the end of the lake and stops to catch his breath. 

The game warden finally catches up to him.  Says, "let me see your fishing license." 

The guy reaches into his wallet and pulls out a fishing license. 

The game warden asks, "Why did you take off running if you have a valid fishing license?"

**********************
1. I felt like running suddenly.
2. I forgot I had a valid license in my wallet and only remember it just know.
3. Cuz my friend back there ain't got a fishing license.
**********************

What do you think the real answer is?  ;D :D ;D
Title: Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
Post by: VillainousHero on December 17, 2021, 03:05:21 AM
Only between a doctor and ....

Man is in the delivery room.  His wife just finished giving birth.

After the the delivery the man pulls the doc aside and asks the doctor this question privately.

"Excuse me doc, but how soon do you think we can have sex?"

The doctor replied, "Give me 10 minutes to change and we can go into my van in the parking lot."

 ;D ;D ;D