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Topics - thehotone

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Marriage & Family Life / Niam Nkauj Mob Ab
« on: January 16, 2020, 04:31:53 PM »
Someone needs to tell these old babies to stop having affairs with our men!  :D

My cousin, who is in his 40's, was having an affair with one and she was willing to become his Niam Yau. She divorced her old grandpa husband and wanted a younger man but the young men don't want a niam nkauj mos ab so she is back to the old men again.  :2funny:

Marriage & Family Life / 2nd marriage
« on: May 13, 2019, 12:44:07 PM »
Do the groom still bow to the bride's side of the family if she's been married once? Asking for a friend.  :)

Entrepreneurial Minds / Marijuana business in California
« on: January 07, 2019, 01:21:56 PM »
Is the Hmong doing marijuana farming in California doing it legally? What's the start up process? I feel like I want to get in on this cash crop too.

Marriage & Family Life / Do you know her?
« on: December 12, 2018, 02:42:33 PM »
Dear EX-sis in law,

When my brother and you were married, his paycheck went straight to the bank. For years, you give him allowances to what he can use because your reasoning was that you were “saving” money. Lord knows what you did with your pay. You control everything in the house because you were the “educated” one with a Bachelor’s in Psychology which was useless because you got a job after 2yrs of looking in a field that doesn’t even required a “Psychology” degree.  Mind you, in case you have forgotten that my brother supported you through college.

 When you met your old flame again and my brother caught you cheating on him. You had the guts to tell MY brother that he was a “No Good Piece of CRAP” and that you made a mistake when you married him because he got you knocked up and that you would’ve never married a man who couldn’t satisfy you in bed like him. Who told you to spread your legs and follow my brother everywhere? Remember, your family tried to force my brother to marry you but he wouldn’t marry you until you got pregnant…. He step up to the plate and took care of his responsibility didn’t he??   You could’ve told everyone that my brother was such a bad person etc.. but you choose to say that if you didn’t get knocked up, you would’ve never married him?

Granted, my brother isn’t a perfect person and he does have his flaws. He is uneducated with only a HS diploma working in a factory. He does indeed have NOTHING to offer you and sometimes will not bend to anyone once his mind is set. True, he is stubborn in every possible way. True, he used to be aThug/Gangster back in the days but you loved that shyte didn’t you? You were the one who parent’s had to come hit you to go home. REMEMBER?

So, when you wanted to leave him for another man, what did he do? He opened the door for you didn’t he? He was hurt but he let you go because you beg him to let you go. You took all the money and you made sure his name was on all your debts didn’t you. You had the courts come looking for him to pay debts he never incurred. 

Even after all that, even after you left,  you have not stop harassing my brother!  You for sure thought my brother will come to your rescue when you found out the grass wasn’t greener on the other side and when you beg him to allow you back into his life and he said NO, didn’t you threaten the cops on him? Yes, my brother moved on faster than you thought he would. Yes, he did end up falling in love again. BUT he doesn’t bother you and your boyfriends does he? NOPE. He has even apologized for the past and that for both of you to move on and do better, there’s children involved so he only wants what is best for the children and for you.  Didn’t he ask you nicely to leave him alone? Didn’t he ask you to stop harassing him and his girlfriend? Didn’t he BEG you to stop stealing from him?

We are sick and tired of your childish threats on calling the police on him, on us or taking the kids away. If you want the kids, take them. My brother told you to take them didn’t he? He even offered to pay you child support didn’t he? Every time you come around or we hear your name, we cringed. If it wasn’t for the kids and their innocence, we would had shut the door on you every time you go over to my brother’s looking for revenge because in your mind, he ruined your “perfect” life.  No one in the family has said one word to your regarding my brother and you. Everyone just want you gone. So please stop trying to find drama for us and calling the cops on us because you think we beat your kids ok.

Go and live your life. We are all very happy for you ok.

The sister in law that you called the cops on last night because she wouldn’t release the kids to you without her brother’s approval

Marriage & Family Life / Another man's money
« on: November 09, 2018, 02:33:42 PM »
There's a newly divorce oversea bride from Laos in St Paul currently. Rumors is that her ex hsb had alot of money growing Xa in California and someone I know personally is trying to get with her in hopes of getting to that money.

Have men stoop that low and desperate? I'm so ashamed to know this person.

Marriage & Family Life / Will they be curse?
« on: September 27, 2018, 12:10:42 PM »
Just wondering.. if you put an oath on your parent’s grave to look after someone or love someone or etc… and you made an oath to Heaven and is willing to drink blood for it. If you change your mind later, will you be curse by it?

Marriage & Family Life / Divorce rates among highly educated men
« on: September 17, 2018, 01:29:32 PM »
I have noticed an influx of men who upon becoming..  Dr’s, Lawyer’s, Pharmacist’s, etc… divorce their wives who has been supporting them to obtain their career. All of a sudden these men feel like they are superior to the woman who made them who they are today. These wives are no less as intelligent as they are but just lack that Doctor, Lawyer, etc stamp because these wives have been supporting them all these years.

Alimony cannot be avoid but the wasted years and efforts.  :'(

Marriage & Family Life / Am I wasting time?
« on: December 21, 2017, 02:49:30 PM »
I’ve been dating this man for almost a year now. When we visit each other, we don’t stay in each other’s home. When he visits, I always invite him over to spend the nights with me and the kids but he doesn’t want to. When I visit him, he offers his place but then also book a hotel.  We always end up renting hotels nearby to spend the night there instead.  We are in a serious relationship and have met each other’s families but we are still reluctant to spend the night in each other’s home. Somehow, this got me thinking today… Are we as serious as we think we are???  Because I don’t want to invest too much time and energy into a relationship that goes nowhere honestly.

Anyone been thru this before?? Advise me or am I just going crazy?

Online Journal / My sad love story
« on: August 19, 2014, 12:16:54 PM »
I accepted a proposal by an old love back then. We were suppose to get marry but my parents didn’t like him so I had to cut ties with him in the meanest possible way so he can let go. I loved him then and I still love him now and am very regretful for what happened but at that time I had no choice.  After a decade and some, last weekend, at a wedding, we meet again. I did not notice him as I was keeping an eye on my children when I brushed shoulder with someone in the too-crowded hall. Instantly, someone grabbed my wrist and I looked up to see that it was my old love! It was like in those movies where the world were turning around us but we were in a standstill moment. His hand were still on my wrist when my stare broke and I mutter “Oh”.  He stared at me for a few seconds more before he let go of my wrist and ask me how I have been.  I couldn’t answer him before one of my child comes running back to me and I stupidly told him it was nice to see him again. I caught him looking over at me but would look away as I was still in shock and really didn’t know what to say.

I kept tabs on him throughout the years but lost him a few years ago but that night, he was in my state, across the country from where we use to live. Turns out the Bride is a cousin of his thru his mother. (small world)  He is still single and has moved on to having a successful life. I received a private call on Sunday but did not get to the phone in time and Private never called back. I am feeling bad bc all the things I wanted to say him, I couldn’t say it. All the things I wanted to give him, I couldn’t. I couldn’t even formally apologize for hurting him. I left our relationship as-is bc I fear and loved my parents more back then. He never ask for his ring back  and I still wear it occasionally.  I don’t know when I will be able to see him again but I have a feeling that I may do something I should’ve done a long time ago.

This is my sad love story.

Wedding Rituals & Customs / Those who are against "bride price"
« on: October 01, 2013, 12:26:15 PM »
I know alot of pple are against the "bride price" that we Hmong have been practicing for generations now and let it be known that it's just not the Hmong who practice this but all of the Southeast Asians do. Thai requires money and gold, so do Laotians and Vietnamese. Hmong are actually simpler, all they want is cash now.

As the parents of the bride, how would you feel about not asking for the bride price but instead pi-cua (I can't spell in Hmong) your daughter gold and cash along with other items for her new life? You'll be hosting the wedding out of your own pockets, of course, and then sending your daughter off to his family with your gold and money.

When I tell people how I feel about it, it's almost you're paying to get rid of your daughter.  ;D So the best solution should be ask for the bride price, use that little money to pay for the wedding expenses and gift it back to your daughter...... ....... right?

Computer & Technology / wireless internet service
« on: January 04, 2013, 09:00:03 AM »
what's the best service for a wireless net service that i can use away from home and while at home as well on my laptop?

Funeral Rituals & Customs / What to expect at a Christian funeral
« on: February 07, 2012, 02:30:27 PM »
Can someone light the way for me on what to expect at a Christian funeral? Is there any ka-sue, cua-cha, niam cooking, sho-cuab? (hmong spelling ???) What are my roles as a nyab? Do we cook or do they cater? Who do he give nyiam sunshine too or do we give any at all? Do they zog-hmo? I'm so lost.  :(

Funeral Rituals & Customs / Kicking the bone at the funeral door
« on: September 27, 2011, 10:27:53 AM »
My hsb's family practice the kicking the bone by the txiv qeej at the funeral door before the deceased leaves the funeral home for burial. Can someone explain this as I've only seen this once. Thanks.

Computer & Technology / husband's work laptop
« on: May 25, 2011, 07:57:52 AM »
I use my hsb's laptop to access the internet at home. The only thing is that it's a company laptop and it's routed thru his company. So by any chances, will the sites we visit be shown on his company's server thingy?

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