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Messages - lilly

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The Single & Dating Scenes / Re: Hmong Match Making
« on: August 02, 2023, 01:42:32 PM »
I'll tell you why. 

You are going to get praise for such action but are you willing to handle the criticism if the deal goes sour?  I always say.  I can lead the horse to the water but the horse still needs to lick that booty.  They are on their own from here on out.  If you accept such term then lets go.   :2funny:

Yeah, that's why the matchmaker's services should come with hold harmless and indemnify clauses, disclaimers, and stipulations.  The parties must sign and agree that the matchmaker's job is solely to match people based on paper similarities and likenesses and based on the matchmaker's best guess of the compatibility of the two people, nothing more.  Once the parties agree to the match, the matchmaker is out of the picture and out of the transaction.  The sale is complete.  No refunds or disputes.    8)

General Discussion / Re: Overthinking
« on: August 02, 2023, 01:31:07 PM »
Yes, I am an overthinker.  That's why I am often sad.  I have to learn to not think at all.  Ignorance is truly bliss, I think.

The Single & Dating Scenes / Re: Hmong Match Making
« on: August 01, 2023, 02:04:43 PM »
I'm totally against this.  :D

Why?  :knuppel2:

I watched the 2022 season of Alone and it got me thinking that the best way to lose weight fast is to limit your caloric intake (aka starve yourself as much as you can) WHILE working out your body at same time.  But stay as hydrated as possible.

General Discussion / Re: What matters to you, be honest
« on: July 31, 2023, 11:31:41 PM »
What matters to me the most?  Honestly?  My health, then my kids, then me being a good provider, a good person, and affecting other people in a positive way.

Poetic Souls / Re: Meadows Sway
« on: July 31, 2023, 11:25:47 PM »

The days grow older
And the winds blow colder
As the meadows sway in a rusty yellow
In the plains of the southwest below
Bluish grey and open skies
When stars refuse to take their velvety rise.

Birds take wing
For what the season will bring
And all this I watched
Sat, stared, waited, and all was silenced
By the audible voices whispering among sleeping branches,
Bushes, shrubs, and grasses

And all this I appreciated
The tranquil dusk as the noble fiery star setted
A breath of fresh air
But a longing not filled with despair
While I am here.

Such a nice and lovely poem.   I wish the poets would come back and kiss our hearts and minds with their poetic words.  Pretty please???

Jokes & Riddles / Re: What does it take to be a doctor...
« on: July 31, 2023, 11:22:39 PM »
OMG,  ::).  I thought I was going to actually learn tips on what it takes to be a doctor.  Lame!

A question with some nice answers!  O0

The Single & Dating Scenes / Re: Hmong Match Making
« on: July 31, 2023, 11:10:13 PM »
Interesting stories..thank you for sharing. 

I think now a day we need hmong match making more than ever before.  If we don't, we're going to find many of the hmong singles dating out of race.  Why?  They are so busy w/ careers, education, and they hide themselves pretty well from one another to the point if we're not helping, they won't find one another.

I have been thinking the same thing lately too.  A Hmong matchmaker is something that we definitely need these days.  Someone that has a good read on people, who can study all the different profiles, interview the different candidates for their wants and needs, and match people up accordingly.  Matches may not always work out, but having someone who can do a lot of the upfront work of filtering and narrowing down, will be so helpful!  I mean, Indians and Jews use matchmaker services, why not have a Hmong matchmaker too?!

Maybe I should start my Hmong Matchmaker business!!!  I will be taking time to study and interview people, so, I will definitely be charging a fee.  What do you guys think is a good fee amount to charge?

Online Journal / Re: letitbenonmundane
« on: July 31, 2023, 10:28:30 PM »
Anyway, gosh... Where do I start?  I have so much to say but lately I feel like I am unable to speak the words.  The words remain trapped inside my mouth and they, they just don't come out.

I have gone through so much these last couple of years but I feel like this year in particular, everything and my whole world drastically spiraled out of control.  It started out as a little snowball the size of a ping pong ball, but with each passing month, that snowball got bigger and bigger until a full-fledged snowman was formed, with eyes, nose, mouth, arms, hands, buttons, hat, and scarf dressed on too, to boot!  Talk about cherry on top!  Except, instead of a sweet succulent treat like an ice cream sundae, it seems the last 9 months have been one huge, no end in sight, disaster.  It finally culminated into a whole mental health breakdown.  I have never experienced anxiety like what I've gone through.

Thankfully, I am at the tail end of this dark passage in my life.  I feel that I am exiting this long and dark tunnel finally.  I can breathe a sigh of relief!  I see the sun!

I don't think people truly understand how scary anxiety and depression are.   Or, how important it is to take care of your mental health.  It is so important!

For people that don't know about what causes anxiety and depression, one of the things that causes anxiety and depression is your THOUGHTS.  Please know that it is not good at all to sit with your thoughts for too long.  When you are at a crossroads, it is important to just make a decision and stick with it. The back and forth battles that go on in your mind are not good for you.  The feelings of hopelessness, of thinking that you are so alone in the world, thinking that you are so unloved... are poisons that will eventually take shape in the form of crippling anxiety, restlessness, and eventually turn into sleeplessness, to the point of not being able to sleep for weeks.  Please don't ever let it get that far.

If I could tell anyone with anxiety, I would tell them to BREATHE.  To LET IT GO. 
- Let go of worries, of dark feelings, and focus only on the positives.  Life has never been easy for you?  Don't dwell on things that you have no control over.
- Maybe a romantic relationship isn't going the way you want and it is no longer serving you and it's no longer good for your mental health?  Let it go.  You need to let it go, so that something even better can come into your life. 
- Your child disappoints you?  Let it go. Let them live their life.  Pray for them, always let them know that you love them, that you are there for them.  Trust that life experiences will teach them right from wrong.  As long as you know you have done all that you could for your child, that is all that you can do, so, let it go, breathe.
- If a job causes you anxiety and stress, let it go.  Breathe.  Take it one day at a time.
- Have faith and NEVER LOSE HOPE--believe that good things are on their way to you.  Again, focus only on the positives!

When you start to feel anxious, remember to come down from your mind and all your thoughts... into your body. Focus on your body and on your breathing.  Be in the present moment with your body and your breath.

In conclusion, the last 9 months have been true hell.  But after I came out on the other side of my crippling anxieties and severe depression, I gained this deep appreciation for life.  I am just so grateful for my life.  I understand now that I am so blessed beyond measure.

I am also now, more than ever, so acutely aware of how short and how extremely precious life is. We are but a mere breath in the wind.  And so many times, in my life, god has saved me. There is a reason for the breaths that I breathed and continue to breathe.

I may not always understand why my life has been so hard, so sad... but I trust that a good, amazing life is yet to unfold for me.  God has something great in store for me.  I know it!  I feel it!

Online Journal / Re: letitbenonmundane
« on: July 31, 2023, 09:11:09 PM »
I'd like to thank PH for continuing to be a platform for PH OG's like me.  Thank you, PH Admins, too, for continuing to monitor this platform and ensuring it remains a safe and respectful environment. I know traffic isn't what it used to be, but it is still a wonderful place to come back to to reminisce.  It's still an effective mental health outlet for many of us.  So, thank you very much!!!

Online Journal / Re: she really?
« on: July 31, 2023, 09:03:15 PM »
Good to see all is well with you, luvlylisa!  Like you, I am still alive too.   :wave:

Online Journal / Re: Life's Milestones
« on: July 31, 2023, 08:59:06 PM »

I thought this would be a good anime to watch w/ my daughter.  Recently she went through some tough time and I was hoping this movie would bring a little comfort that it's going to be OK.  It sort of went as  I had hope and afterward we gave each other big hugs.  W/tears streaming down my face, I said, "I love you honey."  Being a mom is the toughest job in the entire world.

Yes, being a mom is the toughest job in the world.  We feel so much stuff for our kids.  They are our life.  It's so had to watch our kids being sad, etc.  I love no one else more than my kids.  They are #1 always, then it's whoever's else.

Online Journal / Re: Life's Milestones
« on: July 31, 2023, 08:53:50 PM »
Ladies trip this year, Sapa and Halong Bay among other places.  It's a few months from now but it's happening....

How fun!!!  Hope you have lots of fun and laughter on your trip!

Online Journal / Re: Life's Milestones
« on: July 31, 2023, 08:52:45 PM »
He Clears The Snow

In our area we had a severe storm warning in the afternoon.  Schools were closed and people working 2nd shift were  home.  My car was covered in snow and he cleared them this morning and made sure the sidewalk, path to my car is clear.  That's love in action.   Count my blessings!

My love language is Acts of service too.

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