PebHmong Discussion Forum

Relationship => General Relationship => Topic started by: JonniJacko on March 22, 2025, 06:49:04 PM

Title: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on March 22, 2025, 06:49:04 PM
The man who chase has no self respect, no shame, he do anything to get her. A woman that makes a man chase her, has low self esteem, needs constant validation. You can be sure, this dynamic will end sooner or later as it only breed resentment. The man will get exhausted from having to constantly trying to please her, and when he stops or check out, she gets Angry. But her anger is not out of love, but self pity.

Like someone who wants to be your friend. If they are overly friendly, try to hard to impress you, and not giving you a turn to see if you want to reciprocate or not, disregards your feelings.

Someone who gives you the impression take it or leave it, it doesn't affect my happiness. That's the kind of person you consider letting into your orbit, and go from there if they do show signs of interest.
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Believe_N_Me on April 01, 2025, 10:21:40 AM
Having strong feelings for someone is not enough to make a life.

Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on April 01, 2025, 01:43:29 PM
To men it's about love and respect , to women it's about survival and comfort security.  One has to give. so only fair way is both meet halfway. But then there's a bird out in the Amazon somewhere where he has to build a house, flare his feathers and sing his heart out to woo the females. A female who is potentially interested will fly over, inspect the house, and she will either stay or fly away.

hmmm...maybe most men out there got it backwards..mys elf admittedly, included. Bc neither my sisters would agree with me either. Lmao they will say... survival first. As in safety's first. *Scratches head ..lol
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Believe_N_Me on April 02, 2025, 10:04:10 AM
For me, it's more about "why" he is chasing. Players chase the most because they just want to get inside a woman's pants. Avoidants chase because they want to feel validated and get an ego boost. Good men chase for an entirely different reason - and this is how you know that he is a good man with good intentions and is a builder.
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Believe_N_Me on April 02, 2025, 11:57:38 AM
Men who say that they don't want to chase always end up chasing a Jezebel, Delilah, or settling for a Leah.  ::)

If you know what you want up front and don't mind chasing to get it, then you will get a Rachel.

When you're indecisive about life and who to have as your partner, then life will choose for you.
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on April 02, 2025, 10:01:31 PM
But good men are the prize here. He's the one who is gonna have to trade his life for hers, if anything..So she better show that she is worth it...LOL

For me, people misjudge me all my life. They say, that guy is so snobby, who does he think he is, how come he's not flirting, talking or chasing me....and it's like, well, uhh maybe Its because I'm the real deal, I'm the King, I look for service, I'm not a peasant looking to serve. LMAO

I think it all comes down to initiating, courting, talking,dating and relationship styles. It's just a matter if two people share the same or similar style in each of the categories. or most of the categories.

I always tell my women co-workers...Nothing wrong with a woman doing the pursuing. Why worry about being call easy and desperate- when you just know what you want and what you deserve.  >:D Since then 2 of them pursue the man of their dreams, and even propose..lol okay j.k
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Believe_N_Me on April 09, 2025, 01:11:58 AM
Men are never the prize, it's the woman who is the prize.

Anyways, I'm skeptical of men who always talk about wanting reciprocity. They're usually the one who give it the least to their current situation because they're too busy claiming how they didn't get it in the past.  ::)

Remember the story from Lessons Learned about the man who bragged about jumping at great heights? One of the villagers requested that he perform that feat for them. The man claimed that he could only do it at the site where it happened.  ::)
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on April 09, 2025, 07:44:17 PM
Men are never the prize, it's the woman who is the prize.

Anyways, I'm skeptical of men who always talk about wanting reciprocity. They're usually the one who give it the least to their current situation because they're too busy claiming how they didn't get it in the past.  ::)

Remember the story from Lessons Learned about the man who bragged about jumping at great heights? One of the villagers requested that he perform that feat for them. The man claimed that he could only do it at the site where it happened.  ::)

The prize is is neither the man or woman- but the thing they call love when two people choose each other, accept each other's worst and best, and more importantly, die for one another...haha . That can't happen without mutual desire from both sides. haha 8)
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Prude on April 12, 2025, 08:41:11 AM
The man who chase has no self respect, no shame, he do anything to get her. A woman that makes a man chase her, has low self esteem, needs constant validation. You can be sure, this dynamic will end sooner or later as it only breed resentment. The man will get exhausted from having to constantly trying to please her, and when he stops or check out, she gets Angry. But her anger is not out of love, but self pity.

Like someone who wants to be your friend. If they are overly friendly, try to hard to impress you, and not giving you a turn to see if you want to reciprocate or not, disregards your feelings.

Someone who gives you the impression take it or leave it, it doesn't affect my happiness. That's the kind of person you consider letting into your orbit, and go from there if they do show signs of interest.

There have been a few women who have
played hard to get. So many men have
chased them but none really got them.

Have you seen some not-so-hot guys
marrying some extremely hot chicks
who could have hooked Brat Pitt or
Bay Watch's hunks?  That's because
they men have chased.


Nowadays, the opportunities are too
abundant on social media, funerals,
J4s, etc. You really have to stand out
to hook...Or else they'll hook up with
someone else that stands out or they'll
hook with different people each time.  :2funny: :2funny:


Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Believe_N_Me on April 13, 2025, 03:13:49 AM
JJ,

Txog nyias tus nyias mam li paub.
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on April 13, 2025, 09:54:48 PM
There have been a few women who have
played hard to get. So many men have
chased them but none really got them.

Have you seen some not-so-hot guys
marrying some extremely hot chicks
who could have hooked Brat Pitt or
Bay Watch's hunks?  That's because
they men have chased.


Nowadays, the opportunities are too
abundant on social media, funerals,
J4s, etc. You really have to stand out
to hook...Or else they'll hook up with
someone else that stands out or they'll
hook with different people each time.  :2funny: :2funny:

This is why Godly men will say, the woman has to choose the man---or is it more like when it's his turn. lol
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on April 13, 2025, 09:55:45 PM
JJ,

Txog nyias tus nyias mam li paub.

tsis paub, tsis k lawm tiag os. kuv na...lol
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Believe_N_Me on April 14, 2025, 12:23:05 PM
It's a red flag to me when the man doesn't initiate. Obviously, you gotta keep an eye out for the ones who are only chasing to get sex. The point I want to make is that when a man is more interested in your world, it shows that he doesn't know who he is, has nothing to offer, and is trying to get things out of you until he's done. I've seen this happen to so many women who bring the man into their world.

A good man is someone who has something to offer. He knows that it's his job to impress and convince the woman to say "yes" to him. A man is more committed to the relationship when it's the woman who fits his lifestyle. Men are wired to find a woman who accepts him. Women are wired to adjust in order to fit their man's lifestyle. If a woman is unwilling to do this, she will become a nag, drama queen, unhappy, etc.

This is why women should always be checking out if she can fit into his lifestyle. She has to accept everything about him.

If a man accepts your chasing, then he is most likely unsure of what he wants in life and is just buying time. He will leave when he tires of you, finally knows what he wants, or you kick him out. Again, how many times have we seen this story play out?????? 
Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on April 14, 2025, 11:28:34 PM
It's a red flag to me when the man doesn't initiate. Obviously, you gotta keep an eye out for the ones who are only chasing to get sex. The point I want to make is that when a man is more interested in your world, it shows that he doesn't know who he is, has nothing to offer, and is trying to get things out of you until he's done. I've seen this happen to so many women who bring the man into their world.

A good man is someone who has something to offer. He knows that it's his job to impress and convince the woman to say "yes" to him. A man is more committed to the relationship when it's the woman who fits his lifestyle. Men are wired to find a woman who accepts him. Women are wired to adjust in order to fit their man's lifestyle. If a woman is unwilling to do this, she will become a nag, drama queen, unhappy, etc.

This is why women should always be checking out if she can fit into his lifestyle. She has to accept everything about him.

If a man accepts your chasing, then he is most likely unsure of what he wants in life and is just buying time. He will leave when he tires of you, finally knows what he wants, or you kick him out. Again, how many times have we seen this story play out??????

I always had girls throw themselves at me, so I never knew what it feels like or how to initiate/chase women until now... ;D

Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: Believe_N_Me on April 21, 2025, 04:50:27 PM
I always had girls throw themselves at me, so I never knew what it feels like or how to initiate/chase women until now... ;D



Girls can approach or give hints that they like a guy.


Title: Re: Good men don't don't look for approval, they look for reciprocity
Post by: JonniJacko on April 22, 2025, 01:32:46 PM
Girls can approach or give hints that they like a guy.

guys don't get hints. Or some guys are even more tais caus. Haha.