PebHmong Discussion Forum

Relationship => Dear Dr. PebHmong => Topic started by: gunnerstahl on February 08, 2016, 03:50:24 AM

Title: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 08, 2016, 03:50:24 AM
anyone ever have this problem? tell me your story. insecure about their past their family and always think the hmong community will think something about them or what they do. never want to just be open and honest / show who they are when its not a big deal to the rest of us. <moved>
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: theking on February 08, 2016, 12:09:08 PM
anyone ever have this problem? tell me your story. insecure about their past their family and always think the hmong community will think something about them or what they do. never want to just be open and honest / show who they are when its not a big deal to the rest of us. <moved>

If she's truly "traditional", she should just do what her man says regardless because that's her traditional role (be submissive and obedient)...even if her man have mistresses openly or even married a second or third wife... ;D
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 08, 2016, 03:32:22 PM
Traditional with all the fronting ways
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Jiggles on February 08, 2016, 05:50:25 PM
What you talking about traditional women? Traditional Hmong men are the same way if not worse.
Title: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 08, 2016, 09:43:26 PM
What you talking about traditional women? Traditional Hmong men are the same way if not worse.
Asking for your story not your opinion
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: yuknowthat on February 09, 2016, 09:11:15 AM
Dating a traditional women is better than dating a religious woman.  ::)
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Dok_Champa on February 10, 2016, 10:39:40 AM
anyone ever have this problem? tell me your story. insecure about their past their family and always think the hmong community will think something about them or what they do. never want to just be open and honest / show who they are when its not a big deal to the rest of us. <moved>
From your description, this type of woman is one with moral, who understands the world and how the world works, and is reserved (cautious).  Nothing wrong with that.

Maybe you relate well to a woman whose philosophy is "me,myself, and I."- Maybe.

Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 10, 2016, 04:28:50 PM

From your description, this type of woman is one with moral, who understands the world and how the world works, and is reserved (cautious).  Nothing wrong with that.

Maybe you relate well to a woman whose philosophy is "me,myself, and I."- Maybe.
The way you reply to this makes me think you grew up in a community like hers where people gossip a lot. I did not and I stay away from people that do.

The people that mind don't matter, the people that matter don't mind.
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Dok_Champa on February 11, 2016, 12:20:01 PM
The way you reply to this makes me think you grew up in a community like hers where people gossip a lot. I did not and I stay away from people that do.

The people that mind don't matter, the people that matter don't mind.
You just gossip about a certain type of woman like people gossip about a divorce woman-creating stigma for both.



Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 11, 2016, 06:32:14 PM

You just gossip about a certain type of woman like people gossip about a divorce woman-creating stigma for both.

Answer the question or be defensive that's up to you
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Dok_Champa on February 11, 2016, 09:18:58 PM

Answer the question or be defensive that's up to you
Shouldn't have call you a gossiper..very immature :D :D :D  Sollie...shoul d have known better.. Sollie nawb!
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Asharia on February 11, 2016, 09:19:11 PM
You should respect that women are different. Some are open, some are reserved. Some take a while to trust and some are entirely too trusting. From your description it actually sounds like these women you're talking about are just cautious about what they do and say because they care about how their actions and words reflect back on their family. I have high respect for people who are discreet; they are far more thoughtful and considerate than people who go around blabbing shit to everyone because "it's not a big deal."
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 11, 2016, 10:55:57 PM

You should respect that women are different. Some are open, some are reserved. Some take a while to trust and some are entirely too trusting. From your description it actually sounds like these women you're talking about are just cautious about what they do and say because they care about how their actions and words reflect back on their family. I have high respect for people who are discreet; they are far more thoughtful and considerate than people who go around blabbing shit to everyone because "it's not a big deal."
To put things in context of course there are things you don't need to talk about, but in the course of your normal conversation you can tell people you are doing errands, etc or talk about important things to your best friends ask them to keep things on the down low and expect it to happen versus not trusting anyone with anything. Thats just a sad way to live
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 12, 2016, 02:27:34 AM
What I'm looking for is people's stories showing how they tried to get through to these women that it's okay to be your true self and be open, not fearful of people's opinions who are nothing in your life
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 12, 2016, 06:59:45 AM

They dont, they gave up trying and so should you. You should be proud of those good women....I am very proud of them!!!
Are you trying to get into a traditional woman's paint or pockets? Those women have value and pride, Dude.They think with their head, which is good. Unless they really really like you, you will never have a real chance with them.  Good luck!
please read the whole comment and revise
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Dok_Champa on February 12, 2016, 08:57:52 AM
Fear (fear of rejection, what people think, getting hurt, etc..) and insecurity (about the family, past, self, relationship, etc..) applies to all group young and old. 

Now if you are talking about npab nauj then yes probably applies to traditional folks more like npab nauj wear shorts in winter, below 0 temperature.  Npab nauj when you try to hold her hands but she "shy away" and giggling covering her mouth, npab nauj wash clothes in the kitchen sink..

or nab nauj eat pho without using fish sauce ahhahaha.. something like that.
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: gunnerstahl on February 12, 2016, 04:55:37 PM

Fear (fear of rejection, what people think, getting hurt, etc..) and insecurity (about the family, past, self, relationship, etc..) applies to all group young and old. 

Now if you are talking about npab nauj then yes probably applies to traditional folks more like npab nauj wear shorts in winter, below 0 temperature.  Npab nauj when you try to hold her hands but she "shy away" and giggling covering her mouth, npab nauj wash clothes in the kitchen sink..

or nab nauj eat pho without using fish sauce ahhahaha.. something like that.
I think it is partly that
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Hung_Low on February 15, 2016, 09:16:55 PM
O0

Why did you contact me and then blocked me from answering you?
Did I do something wrong?
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: floaty on October 26, 2016, 12:02:33 PM
Here is a story:

Boy: I can't move out. I got to take care of my parents. Everyone will say I abandoned them.
Girl: I can't live like this. Your parents treat me like shlts. They lie to the whole world that I am a monster. When people see me, they give me the stink eye. I have never disobeyed your parents or mistreated them.
Boy: Don't listen to them. What matters is us. Not them. Don't listen to gossip. Just be yourself. Everyone will love you as much as I do.
Girl: ok. Because I know you have to take care of them, I'll be patient.

Mom: leave that no good monster wife you have. You are Hmong, I can buy you 10 wives.
Boy: ok mom.

You asked for a story.
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Giggles_Shyly on November 02, 2016, 01:13:54 PM
Here is a story:

Boy: I can't move out. I got to take care of my parents. Everyone will say I abandoned them.
Girl: I can't live like this. Your parents treat me like shlts. They lie to the whole world that I am a monster. When people see me, they give me the stink eye. I have never disobeyed your parents or mistreated them.
Boy: Don't listen to them. What matters is us. Not them. Don't listen to gossip. Just be yourself. Everyone will love you as much as I do.
Girl: ok. Because I know you have to take care of them, I'll be patient.

Mom: leave that no good monster wife you have. You are Hmong, I can buy you 10 wives.
Boy: ok mom.

You asked for a story.

 :2funny: 
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: Shortstuff87 on January 16, 2017, 09:27:06 PM
I've dated an insecure non-traditional hmong man. I can't deal with the insecurities, even when I was around him the majority of the time he still thinks I'm cheating or trying to get with someone else. After 8 months of that BS, I ended things. ::) ::) :idiot2: :idiot2:
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: nooneever on January 17, 2017, 10:38:29 AM
These are my favorite type of women, it means I have less to do in order to break them down.  Back in college a girl I was seeing thought I was talking to other women from another school.  Whenever I didn't call her back she would text me accusing me of being with other women.  Well, for the most part she was right.  How do girls do that?

One day she confronted me at home and wouldn't leave until I gave her a straight answer.  I told her that I am at a low point in life and that my affairs were my way of asking for help.  If she didn't want to be with me at my lowest then she doesn't deserve me when I'm at my highest.

She left me about an hour after that, because what kind of self respecting woman wouldn't?
Title: Re: dating traditional insecure hmong women
Post by: captian on March 02, 2018, 02:12:08 PM
anyone ever have this problem? tell me your story. insecure about their past their family and always think the hmong community will think something about them or what they do. never want to just be open and honest / show who they are when its not a big deal to the rest of us. <moved>
dang bro, you just explained yourself.  :2funny: :idiot2: