March 19, 20014
Dear Twinflame,
As I put pen to paper (in this case, finger tips to the keyboard), it is my hope that life has been treating you well. As I look back, I realized that I have come so far. Gone is the lonely woman who counts the seconds ticking by that she is separated from you. Gone is the sad woman whose heart awaits every sense of you. You came at a moment in my life when I needed love more than the very air that I breathe. You came into my life on a whirlwind. You came into my heart with such a force that I was powerless to stop you. And for that, you will always have a special place in my memories. There is a part of me that will always love that part of you (the part that does not exist).
Your love, at that moment in time, gave me the courage do that that which I have never dared to do in my life before. You made me realize that love was worth having and worth fighting for. I could not have you. Mostly because you weren't real, but also because your heart was not yours to give. As I look back and re-read our letters and re-read the words you said about me in the last moments of our dying love, I often wonder if you even knew what love was, if you had even felt love in your life ever. I feel sad that of all the love that came your way, you neither had the heart nor the capacity to see or understand those love. I have no doubt that you have been loved by many. For I was such an unfortunate one. What I do doubt is if you had it in you to know when those love was real. I wonder if you walk around all this time - cold and lonely - unable the see and feel the love that surrounds you.
I have come to accept the fact that while my love for you was real, you neither loved me nor did you have the capacity to love anyone - least of all, yourself. Oh, you knew all the right words. You called me all the right endearments. You made me feel all the feelings. But you didn't feel anything. They were nothing but empty words. Words you have somehow mastered along the way. There is a part of me that still feel that you are my twinflame, and that between twinflames, there is a total acceptance of the other's flaws - flaws that we would not tolerate in any other living souls. I love you with a love that is beyond comprehension and beyond all reasons. And I may very well always love you. But I have a sneaking feeling that by the time you and I know for sure if we were twinflames or not, it will no longer matter. For where we are going, there is only ONE person that matters, and that is neither you nor I.
And so this letter may sound like a reprimand, but it is really a thank-you letter. Yes, I suck at writing. I know. I am working on it. Some day, I will end this journal with a more fitting letter. For now, it's a good start.
Always & Forever,
ButterflyKisse s