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Author Topic: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY  (Read 20330 times)

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Honey

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #15 on: April 29, 2009, 01:05:07 PM »
can't they do that now?

I've heard of ONE case. But I don't think it's too well-known. I'm not sure.



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Miss-atia

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #16 on: April 29, 2009, 03:45:44 PM »
I'd prefer to pay, because then his family can't say anything about what we do, or especially what I choose to do. We can live on our own, do as we please and they'd have to suck it in.
i agree..




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HOTSES

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #17 on: May 11, 2009, 07:58:46 PM »
I think there's a high percentage of hmong men paying for hmong women and yet the young couple ends up living with the women's family hehehe

I don't think there should be a dowry anymore...     use to be about tradition and respect...   this generation doesn't really care or respect traditions anymore...   just saying...

Couple should save up and have a big nice wedding & start a family by buying a house/cars/enjoy life...    when we marry, we're so focus on finding work, behind in debt and trying to please both sides...   we forget that we marry each other because we love each...we should travel and enjoy life before having kids...       



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yamaha

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #18 on: May 11, 2009, 08:10:10 PM »
that's totally fine too..so the og's wouldn't have to go borrow from the relatives just to pay for the god damn wife or spent 5-10k for the wife and then next couple of days runs away......5-10k i rather do investment...



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Red_lace

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #19 on: May 12, 2009, 12:58:46 PM »
If anyone would go old traditional then go old tradition other wise why put a price on marriage?

Don't we have just enough trouble with the old ways already (man paying for wives)?

What ever it is, if ya'll don't love each other then quit with the excuses.  BTW, marriages aren't as what it used to be so get your education and society's living expectations. Go pay your credit card bills or give me money if anyone's that loaded.



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MoobGod

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #20 on: May 13, 2009, 11:12:09 PM »
Cov mivnyuas'es,

yog meb sibhlub lawm, meb tsitxhob sibyuav hluas, hluas.  Tsitxhob taij namtxiv tas meb yuav sibyuav.  Meb nyob uake ib ntus es yog meb kevhlub zoo, meb moog ua ntaubntawv sibyuav xwb txhajle tsi nkim nam/txiv tej nyaj hab sijhawm lug ua mej tej roojtshoob.  yog meb tsi sibnyam txaus es meb sibnruaj tsintev uas nyav sibyuav ces yuav nkim nkim nam/txiv tej nyaj hab sijhawm/dlaagzug le os. 

es, meb yuav nrug nampuj txivyawm nyob los tau, meb nrug namtais yawmtxiv nyob los tau, meb nyob meb los tau. 



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Return_Of_The_Scholar

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #21 on: May 17, 2009, 10:02:31 AM »
Haha...interes ting.  I got my wife for free and I live
I don't have problem paying for him, but he better move in with my family. I don't believe men will last 3 days with the woman's family. He'll hang himself after 3 days. Men just can't do what women do. They only know how to demand and expect from woman to be the best to their family.  ;)

You are so WRONG!  My wife's parent lived with us, right after we got married.  It's been 3 years now and everything is going fine.  They help us babysit, while we work and run errors for them. 

To me, it's an HONOR to have her parent living with us, since my parent does not want to. I rather love the ogs while they still alive, than when they're already dead.



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kenx

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #22 on: May 17, 2009, 03:09:47 PM »
I have a solution... why don't you all just pay me :) and I'll arrange the wedding.



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NceegVaj

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #23 on: October 08, 2009, 01:02:21 PM »

Quote
Have Hmong woman pay Hmong man? Hmong man to come and live with her parents?

My Final Answer

Reasons why this won't work:

1) Hmong girls can't make enough money to pay the Hmong men.

2) Hmong man once in the family might do something stupid, like relationship with the younger sisters

3) Hmong man needs to be the central guy that does the "dab qhuas".  Hmong women never given that position from god.

4) Of all the 1,000 of people races in the world there is only one race that actually practice this topic so...sooner or later the 1,000 races who don't do this practice will start to look at your women as being insane, crazy, and stupid.  You don't want that.

5) So if a Hmong man goes lives with a Hmong woman then this means that a Hmong woman can have two or three Hmong husbands...but do you really want two or three d1cks sticking at you at once at night?  Just imagine how slippery and stinky it can be...wheew...m ann...I'm disgusted already.



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NceegVaj

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #24 on: October 15, 2009, 10:10:39 AM »
her husband's parent(s) instead.  

It's comical if you paid for your wife.  I didn't.  I'm smarter than the OG.  Here's what worked for me.

My girlfriend was a nurse at that time and she makes good $$.  When we decided to get marry she wrote a check for me for $4,000.  I deposited the money to my checking account.   So the token cost is $5,000.  I paid her parent $1,000 + $4,000= $5,000.  Her dowry was over $4,500 cash plus all the usual pillows, cookware, diapers, etc.

So at the end I really paid about $0.00 but I did invest alot of time, energy, courtship, bribe cousin's time, and great drinking...

To date, we are as happy as any Hmong couple.  And she makes more than I do...of course, I took 51% of child rearing and schooling the kids.  Hehehha...


« Last Edit: October 15, 2009, 10:33:11 AM by NceegVaj »

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Sapphire Moon

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #25 on: October 15, 2009, 10:28:52 AM »
I completely agree with you on that.  O0

I think there's a high percentage of hmong men paying for hmong women and yet the young couple ends up living with the women's family hehehe

I don't think there should be a dowry anymore...     use to be about tradition and respect...   this generation doesn't really care or respect traditions anymore...   just saying...

Couple should save up and have a big nice wedding & start a family by buying a house/cars/enjoy life...    when we marry, we're so focus on finding work, behind in debt and trying to please both sides...   we forget that we marry each other because we love each...we should travel and enjoy life before having kids...       



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Xeemxai

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #26 on: October 19, 2009, 10:15:28 PM »
her husband's parent(s) instead. 

I hope this was not your last wish, turtle.  If you went back and read some more of hmong history, you would find that women used to pay for their husbands.  I also heard that women totured our men badly. 



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starbucks

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #27 on: December 05, 2009, 01:20:12 PM »
Nowadays, plenty of daughter-in-laws no longer adhere to the old mentality of living with the in-laws anymore. I have witnessed many who not only help with their own family more but live closer to them as well. The husbands today pretty much take the passenger seat in their marriages. If this question was brought up pre-2000 I would criticize its absurdity. But seeing how things are today, it's a legit suggestion. 



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starbucks

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #28 on: December 05, 2009, 01:29:20 PM »
I heard of a case... a distant cuz... who's mom (of the hubby) was a very difficult mother-in-law to the nyab... and the nyab couldn't have babies... so one day... after several years of marriage... they really got into a huge argument.

Somehow the issue of the bride price came into the argument, and in anger the nyab paid back all the money of the bride price and then a couple thousand more to stay married to the son.  But afterwards she kicked the mother-in-law out.  She said that since she already paid for her husband, then that she no longer had any obligation to the mother-in-law. 

She even went so far as to tell her hubby that if he wants to be able to bury his mother someday, then he better start saving for it himself.  So they split all the bills... ie: mortgage, utilities, etc... in half and whatever was left over from his paycheck, he'd put aside.  When the mother-in-law passed away, the wifey didn't even go to the funeral...

The saddest part... he was the only son.
Did her parents charge a high brideprice? Sure, the mil is annoying but I would not give her the satisfaction by paying that money back. As with Hmong customs, it's her son's obligation to pay the brideprice. A man who is  unwilling or too broke to pay brideprice probably shouldn't be marrying a Hmong woman to begin with. Maybe he shouldn't be getting married at all and remain a momma's boy forever.

So a word to the wise: don't marry a man who cannot afford to pay a brideprice on his own.



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turtle

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Re: HMONG WOMAN SHOULD PAY
« Reply #29 on: March 16, 2010, 11:48:21 PM »
Almost every wife makes more $$$ than the husband and runs the family and live closer to her parent(s) or live in her parent(S) home. 

Woman should pay for her man and bring him to her god.



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