There's a clear difference between asking because you want to know and asking in order to criticize or troll theism and spouting your own misguided idiocracy.
You're not asking because you want to know, it's quite clear. Regardless of what answer someone gives, you'll give some "explanation" or "exception" in order to criticize them and say what you think is correct. Or in the very simple sense you'll say something like.. "OH well, so and so says it's like this, which is which?" You cherrypick what someone says in order to fit your narrative.
You can't take anything at face value because you think you have the answer already.
Everyone's belief and communication is different. That should be obvious by now. Some are direct communications, some are indirect communications . Everyone does it differently.
And for the record. I don't know this "family" you speak of so I have no comment on the matter. Maybe they aren't communicating with him, maybe they are. Maybe it's indirect. I don't know. I'm not them. I only know how I communicate with god and it's a private matter.
For the record:
They're family member and we all trust each other
They never lied to me
They fled the Vietnam war with my parent
Covert about 10 years ago.
Told me honesty, that God don't think all to them at all
Just silence
So when you tell me, you talk to him all the times. Someone is lying.
Can I come sit next to you and hear your conversation?