Advertisement

Author Topic: Being a parent is hard work!  (Read 797 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline lilly

  • Sr. Poster
  • ****
  • Posts: 6804
  • Gender: Female
  • Be happy!
  • Respect: +524
    • View Profile
Being a parent is hard work!
« on: May 31, 2021, 11:46:04 AM »
For the folks that don't have children yet, just fyi that it takes a village to raise a child.  Raising children is such hard work, if you aren't super rich already.  For example, your wealth will allow you time (that you're not giving to an employer 9+ hours a day) to dedicate to raising your children properly.  But the reality for the majority of parents is, their children miss out on quality time and having their parents being truly present when they are off of work. After work, many of us working parents are exhausted.  We just want to make dinner, eat, and go to bed. But our jobs don't end there. If we love our kids, we read to them, help them with schoolwork, and bond with them.  It takes a lot of energy to be a super mom or a super dad.  So, to the 99.99% of regular folks who work full time and are trying to raise your children at the same time, I'd like to give you two big thumbs up!!!

Imagine being a single parent working full time and trying to raise 2+ kids on your own!  It sucks so bad!  What I hate most, is the time and energy I give to an employer, when I'd rather give my time and energy to my kids.  Kids grow up so fast, you know!!!  So much of yourself you can't give to them when you are busy working to provide for them.  It really is such a bittersweet balance that you have to juggle as a working parent.

I do love the idea of mothers staying home to raise the children like in the good old days.  But the costs of living these days make it impossible for that to be sustainable.  Both parents have to work if you are not fortunate enough to have had inherit wealth from your parents or got lucky with money.

Single parents, tell me your secrets on having endless energy to be a super mom or a super dad.  I feel so disappointed in myself that my kids are growing up so fast and I can't be there all the time for them.  I hate it!!!



Like this post: 0

Adverstisement

Offline lilly

  • Sr. Poster
  • ****
  • Posts: 6804
  • Gender: Female
  • Be happy!
  • Respect: +524
    • View Profile
Re: Being a parent is hard work!
« Reply #1 on: May 31, 2021, 12:10:32 PM »
You don't have to be a single parent to contribute.  As a parent in general, do you ever feel disappointed in not meeting your parenting goals?  Yall, sometimes I just want to cry, OK.  My kids are my world.  They are everything to me.  But between FT work, house maintenance, and being a single mom, I am often burnt out.  I want energy to do things with my kids but often I have no energy, especially with health problems.  And my life in general has been hard so I sometimes get depressed--this takes away any energy I have left.  I feel so disappointed in myself that I've not lived up to the image of the kind of mom that I wanted my kids to have.  :'(

I think I am doing the best I can for them considering, and I hope they grow up to know how much I loved them.  But it doesn't stop me from feeling disappointed in myself.  I made goals that I didn't reach.  Life surprised me with twists and turns. :'(



Like this post: 0

Offline lilly

  • Sr. Poster
  • ****
  • Posts: 6804
  • Gender: Female
  • Be happy!
  • Respect: +524
    • View Profile
Re: Being a parent is hard work!
« Reply #2 on: May 31, 2021, 12:17:21 PM »
Maybe it's good enough that my kids have a roof over their heads, have warm food made with love, gets things they need.  But to me, what they currently have is not enough.  I wanted so much more for my kiddos.  I wanted to be someone for them that they deserve.  Not a constantly burnt out, exhausted mom.



Like this post: 0

Offline ProudLao

  • Mekong In My Heart
  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 10281
  • Still a little boy running free in Laos
  • Respect: +555
    • View Profile
Re: Being a parent is hard work!
« Reply #3 on: May 31, 2021, 06:59:32 PM »
As a good parents you just do enough for them. There’s no need to overly spoiling them to the point where they don’t understand the value of real life, nothing is given for free in life. Teach them hard work pays off and show them the real life. They will thank you for it.

You want them to grow up the way that you have learned not to think that you will give them everything under the moon. If my mom has given me everything I wanted, I would never understand what is like to be a good parent.



Like this post: +1
I take refuge in the Buddha.
I take refuge in the dharma.
I take refuge in the sangha.

Theravada

Offline theking

  • Elite Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 58889
  • Respect: +1322
    • View Profile
Re: Being a parent is hard work!
« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2021, 01:51:42 AM »
For the folks that don't have children yet, just fyi that it takes a village to raise a child. Raising children is such hard work..

We were on the fence and did a lot of planning and research before deciding to have our daughter and so far so good just the two of us. It's a big upfront investment so gotta have the time and dedication to raise a child appropriately and perhaps a little of bit of luck and blessing too. No, throwing your child at grandma when she's trying to enjoy her time left and parking your child in front of a TV are not raising it appropriately IMO. Agree, it's "hard work" if you want to do it right so make that decision carefully for those that are on the fence. So far, the reward has covered the hard work for us and we're thankful for it.  8)

As a good parents you just do enough for them. There’s no need to overly spoiling them to the point where they don’t understand the value of real life, nothing is given for free in life. Teach them hard work pays off and show them the real life. They will thank you for it.

Agree with the "spoiling" point. We don't spoil our kid. For example, she eats what we eat on the dining table. We don't just make her another dish she likes just because she doesn't like what's already on the table. That's how we were taught growing up so we want to pass that valuable life lesson to her too. Another thing that we're doing is make sure she earns her keeps by completing the duties we delegate before she can get the reward, another valuable life lesson IMO. O0



Like this post: 0

Offline Reporter

  • Administrator
  • *****
  • Posts: 84275
  • Pey-Pey and NiNi's 1st Snow Kid.
  • Respect: +562
    • View Profile
Re: Being a parent is hard work!
« Reply #5 on: June 01, 2021, 10:47:36 PM »
I don't envy raising kids.



Like this post: +1
"...
The snooping eye sees everything."--Ono No Komachi, Japanese Poetess (emphasis)

Offline Dok_Champa

  • Sr. Poster
  • ****
  • Posts: 8234
  • Respect: +200
    • View Profile
Re: Being a parent is hard work!
« Reply #6 on: June 11, 2021, 02:29:48 PM »
YES!!!!!!



Like this post: +1
But true love is a durable fire, In the mind ever burning, Never sick, never old, never dead, From itself never turning.<br />               --Sir Walter Raleigh

 

Advertisements