Sometimes I find myself listening to Hmong stories on Youtube, especially the ghost stories and those that relate to shamanism. It really helps me improve my use of the Hmong language as well as gain a better understanding of traditional Hmong beliefs. However, once in awhile I will listen to the relationship dramas.
I can't believe the shallowness of some people. Two days ago I listened to a story about a married man who cheated on his wife. It seemed to me that the affair had been going on for awhile. Anyways, he withdrew money from his 401k, the savings account that he shared with the wife, and basically destroyed his marriage for the mistress. And for what? Because he thought she was so hot looking. The way he described this mistress, she didn't have any redeeming qualities because he couldn't come up with any other reasons. She was a gambler, an alcoholic, liked to party at the clubs, and came from a bad family (brothers tattooed up the ying yang and in and out of jail). They also fought a lot - YET, he was willing to almost throw away his family for this woman. The guy didn't say anything about great sex - at least that would've been something. How shallow can a person be to put up with this? He did say that they couldn't leave each other despite having a rocky affair so it sounds like it was an addiction.
If he had said that the reason why he cheated and dipped into his family's fund was because the mistress fulfilled something the wife wasn't doing as a wife, then at least that would be something. He even said that his wife was attractive, too. And he admitted the wife did everything, which is why in the end he wanted the wife back. Of course, AFTER realizing that the mistress was indeed a poj laib although everybody kept telling him that. It's one thing to sleep with someone but to tear down what the spouse helped built is unforgivable. These cheating stories on Youtube tell us how ugly people can be.
Again, how shallow can a person be to put up with a person who has a horrible personality and other undesirable behaviors? That kind of weakness is such a big turn off and it shows they'll fall for anything, while never appreciating good things. Koj hlub npaum li cas thiab coj zoo los lawv lub niag siab yeej tuag rau tus neeg ua phem xwb. Lawv xum muab lawv lub zog rau tus neeg zoo li ntawd.
I don't blame his wife for kicking him to the curb. He put up so much for that mistress who was also seeing other men on the side because she said they weren't married. It was her way of pressuring him to leave the wife. He even got into confrontations with other men.
If a person would rather put up with someone who is less than you, then they don't deserve you. Let them be miserable together.
Btw, this story was told from his perspective and how he regretted everything after it was too late.