Kuv me Nkauj Hnub

[Sifu]

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[cwjmemdub]

Koj mus
Tseg kuv nyob ib leeg
Leej twg thiaj yuav deev tau kom kuv lub plawv tus
Lub siab txhob zeeg

Koj tso
Kuv nyob nrog lub suab quaj
Yuav nco
Koj txoj kev hlub uas yog ib hauv tshuaj

Kho tau lub plawv tawg
Cawm tau lub siab lwj
Ntshe thaum kawg
Lub siab thiab lub plawv yuav rov ua rwj

Kuamuag tau poob ntau zaus
Tiamsis zaum no yog zaum ntsim tshaj
Kuv thiaj li uv tsis taus
Pw da luam quaj ntsaj

[cwjmemdub]

Hlub tas los hlub dua
Hlub koj tsis muaj hnub dhuav
Kuv txoj kev tshua
Muab rau koj ib leeg yuav


Koj puas hnov kuv tej lus hu nas tus neeg kuv hlub
Niaj hnub tos seb koj puas rov tuaj
Wb yuav mus zaum saib hnubqub
Ua ib hauv tshuaj


Kho kuv lub plawv tawg
Xwb pua phav kab pleb
Ib sij ib ntsawg
Cuag dej hiavtxwv ntas tuaj cheb


Thov hlub ua zaum kawg
Txawm yuav tsis txog ib txhis
Kom kuv lub siab rov ntws los ua ib pawg
Seb txoj sia puas rov tuaj tis

[cwjmemdub]

My heart is growing impatient
Because it's rotten all over
Waiting for my return
To the peak that has snow covered

Revisiting our love lives
So many years ago
A cliff with thousands of beehives
So alive it resembles a firework show

Today, I have nothing to go on
Loosing my mind over the thoughts of loosing you
My heart is torn
For the fact that we can only meet on the moon

Once a month when the moon is full
And it gives lives to all the dark valleys
So, this lonely bull
Can trek and trace his love prints with the drops of honey

Intentionally put there to lead me back
To the birthplace of our love
I've always had it protected
Just in case my heart needs to be healed as recommended by God

[cwjmemdub]

Hnub no
Cia kuv muab wb txoj kev hlub xaus
Muab kev nco
Txiav kom tu ntawm lub hauv paus

Vim tsis muaj hnub
Wb yuav sib tau lawm tiag
Txoj kev hlub
Twb raug lub ntuj cais kiag

Kuv hu los koj tsis teb
Kuv qw los koj tsis hnov
Nce hlo saum tsheb
Cas yog niag txiv yawg tsov

Ntshe yog raug luag yuj
Luag yuav los tos
Thiaj npausuav pom tus ntsuj
Tsa tsis tau ncauj nrog koj hais ib los

nrhiav tau thaj chaw koj nyob
Los tshawb tsis pom txoj lw
Muab tus kab noj lub siab mob
Tshem lawm los yeej tseem ncus ntsuj ntsuav lub caij pw

[Dok_Champa]

cwjmemdub, it takes tremendous courage to love and to let go.  Take baby steps and eventually you'll get somewhere.  Any place is better than where you are... In your shoes would be my worst fear come true

[cwjmemdub]

I don't think I will be able to fall out of love from her this lifetime, DOK.  You definitely don't want to be in my shoe.  I've cried for missing  her for so many years.  My eyes are drying up and I'm starting to have vision problem now.  I often wonder why God did this to me.

[cwjmemdub]

Txhua hnub txhua hmo
Kuv quaj ntsia ntsoov saum lub hli
Vim nws yog wb qhov chaw nco
Chaw saib thaum wb ua si

Txawm lub hli yuav tsaus
Los yuav qaim
Wb yeej saib tsis txaus
Thiab tsis xav ncaim

Zaum no tsis muaj koj
Nrog kuv sib nwj
Lub plawv thiaj mob loj
Lub siab thiaj ua rwj

Tsis muaj tus puag kom sov
Lub caij huab cua txias to
Thiaj quaj ua ib ce khov
Xav tuag rau txoj kev nco

[Dok_Champa]

I don't think I will be able to fall out of love from her this lifetime, DOK.  You definitely don't want to be in my shoe.  I've cried for missing  her for so many years.  My eyes are drying up and I'm starting to have vision problem now.  I often wonder why God did this to me.

If she means that much to you, have you done something about it.  I think if I was in your shoes, I'll live like a HOBO and search the whole world for him starting w/ one corner at a time.  Instead of writing poetry and think about "what if.."  I'll go back to the beginning and work my way from one corner of the world until another..look through all the cracks and places.. until I find him and live my whole life looking for him... and if I don 't find him, die trying.  That's what I would do. 

It looks like you have some unfinished business which only can be resolve by her directly.  If that's the only way, find her OR resolved within yourself without hearing from her. 

I sort of understand what you're going through:)

[cwjmemdub]

Well, several years ago, I decided to give in to my parents demand that I forgot her because we were of different ethnicities.  So, I married my wife and she helped save me from my broken heart.  She's also the most beautiful Hmong lady I've ever met.  She gets compliments wherever we go even from white ppl. Most importantly, she loves me very much, too.  To abandon my wife is just as hard as forgetting my exgf.  I'm in a position where damned if I do or damned if I don't.  This is why I chose to put everything into poetry just to relief all the craziness in me.

[Dok_Champa]

Oh no you shouldn't abandon your wife and sometimes in life when you've tried everything and doesn't work, that's when you say,  "it is what it is.." 

[cwjmemdub]

I will never make the mistakes others made because I'm her first and her last.  We've been together for a very long time, yet, we're still like to love birds can't leave each other's sight.

Lub zos Nong Khai kuv me nplooj siab
Koj tus me ntxhiab sawv nraim kuv plawv
Siab mob tsuj tsawv yuav ciaj yuav tuag
Wb daim ntawv ntuag thiaj tsis sib tau
Sib hlub thaum yau thiaj tsis tau koj
Kab mob thiaj noj kuv plawv ntsoog tas
Tau lwj ua kas tsis muaj hnub zoo
Txhua hli txhua xyoo txog hnub sib hlub
Tsuas yog npau ntub thiaj li ntsib koj
Hnub npau suav ploj kuv yuav ua cas
Qhov muag qhuav tas quaj tsis taus lawm
Nco siab yuav tawm dhia pig pig poog poog
Ib ce twb loog thiab caus yaum tas
Ntshav cuag kob zas ntub tag ib ce
Niaj hnub zaum pe kom ntuj rov pub
Kuv tau los hlub koj ib zaug dua

[cwjmemdub]

Let me be your heart's welder
Let me be your soul's keeper
I want to sit by your side all night long
I want to sing to you all the romantic songs
I want you to know that I really care
I want to bring out the best in me for you to share
Humans often show their animal behaviours
I want to show you that my heart is all tender
I will never falter my love for you
I will always remember that with any minute your love debt for me is due
I will stitch every broken piece of your heart
Make sure that when its beating starts
It will be as good as new
I will give it a magic power to heal itself in the future, too

[cwjmemdub]

Thanks Wild Heart.


Hearing the wind whistling by
It sounded like your whisper
I thought I was going to die
The only way I could have my missing you purged

I felt the pain traveled through my every vein
Millions of needles poking my heart
It was worse than going insane
I thought a vampire was sucking my blood

Nothing could help me pulled my strength together
So, I let my body floated in the air
I felt the hardness of a boulder
Then I saw my soul stared

At someone lying in a pool of blood
Lifeless and all crumbled
People gathered bones and flesh into a tarp
and my soul got help ascending upward by angels

When I woke up from my daydream
I cried my heart out
And took the longest time to let off the steam
Ranting on the top of a mountain out loud

[cwjmemdub]

Sitting by the porch
Looking at the road all the way to the end
I must have been born a dork
for hoping that I'd get your hand

My waiting turns months into years
And years into decades
I've never realized that my eyes were in tear
And suffering multiple heartaches

Growing old without you
A fact I have to accept
Listening to the blue
Is the only way my time is passed