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Author Topic: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session  (Read 10402 times)

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Offline yuknowthat

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Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« on: July 10, 2011, 01:55:33 PM »
What I am about to say will probably offend many Hmong Txiv Xaiv because I think that the Txiv Xaiv Part should be taken out especially when foom kom to the children and many relatives. It can be an optional thing for the family of the deceased. I said that because obviously many doesn't know or care what they say and they bow and bow till sunrise. The family of the deceased can be paying up to 1k for just asking the gentlemen to come say a couple lectures about life(don't gamble, don't steal, don't go mess with other people's wives or husband, etc...)

what's your thoughts about it?



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Offline realism

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #1 on: July 10, 2011, 03:36:24 PM »
I actually somewhat like it, probably the best part



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Offline DivineTreasure

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #2 on: July 10, 2011, 08:55:02 PM »
I like that part.  Cov txawj mloog ces khaws tau cov lus nyiaj lus kub coj mus ua neej, cov tsis txawj mloog ces mloog nkag sab no tshwm sab tov lawm xwb os.



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Offline Reporter

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #3 on: July 10, 2011, 09:15:42 PM »
I like how the guy tells people the truth: nej niam (nej txiv) tuag lawm tiag tiag nawb zaum na; nej yuav tau khwv nej thiaj tau noj tau haus.

Many people need to be reminded of basic things, so it's ok to have him there.



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Offline Fishhead

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #4 on: July 11, 2011, 09:54:58 AM »
Some folks who dislike someone dearest to them for whatever the reason is. He or she won't cry
a tear but until foo koom thing this invidual will cry the loudest. All because the Txiv Xaiv remind him
or her that this will be the last time one can get to see his or her dearest, when sun rise and morning
come he or she will never going to see this person again. Doesn't matter how much one hate
or love this individual when wake up in the moring, this invidual will not be there for one to hate or love.
If lucky enough he or she might get chance to see in the dream.

So yes we do need the txiv xiav. If one doesn't want to do anything with the Hmong culture then Christian
is another way out.



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Offline hmongperson

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #5 on: July 12, 2011, 04:14:05 PM »
The Txiv Xaiv, and the foom koom is one of the most important aspect to a Hmong funeral. It's true that some pay ridiculous amounts for it, but we pay even more for even more ludicrous things. When I look at the Txiv Xaiv, primarily when they foom koom, I don't view it as the Txiv Xaiv blessing the survivors, but more of an eulogoy. He gives voices to the decease, telling the family what would of the been the decease's last words.

The Txiv Xaiv can bless the family as much as they want, but if the family does not act on it nothing will come of it. Just because he said some good things to you it doesn't mean you will get it. You have to go out there and get it for yourself, the blessings will guide the way.




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Offline slude

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #6 on: July 12, 2011, 11:11:23 PM »
txiv xaiv is a dying art. i don't think it should be taken out, txiv xaiv is a reality check for those of us who are caught up in our busy lives. it inspires us to teach and love our own kids and that our parents love-d us that much and more.

xyom cuab should not have to sit and bow all night, instead xyom cuab should relax and sit comfortably in a chair during txiv xaiv. less strain on the body and more attention on the words.



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Offline yuknowthat

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #7 on: July 13, 2011, 09:25:20 AM »
every opinion is true but how many will keep those words and apply it to their daily lives? 2 out of 10? that's why kuv thiaj li ask nej qhov opinion...yog tias tus understand ces khaws coj mus ua neej tsim txiaj,  hos yog tus khaws tsis tau ib los coj mus ua neej, hais tag los nkag sab no tawm sab tov lawm xwb.



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Offline hmongperson

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #8 on: July 15, 2011, 01:36:03 AM »
Like I've stated, foom koom is supposed to be the last words of the deceased. If they could of said something before they passed, those would of been the words that they would of wanted for the survivors. The words are not for the many, but rather for the few. Only one or two person will take something out of it. Just like the educational system, we all go through it but only a few of us will make it big.



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Offline thehotone

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #9 on: July 15, 2011, 08:34:25 AM »
Some family no longer bow when they do this. I went to a funeral once where they sat in chairs and you couldn't tell who was the xyob cuab or who wasn't and b/c they sat in chairs, they were busy talking among themselves. I didn't like that at all! One of my hsb's uncle is opting out the txiv xaiv part when he passes. He states that his children don't understand it and that he is not going to give the final blessing b/c ua neeg nyob lawm tsis mloog nwb lus.



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Offline Qau

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #10 on: August 03, 2011, 01:17:40 PM »
I too agree Txiv Xaiv can be left out.  No one has the time and patience and kids do not give a damn or understand. You want to bless your kids do it while you are still alive. You want to love your parents, do it when they are still alive.  The most important persons yuav tuaj foom ces yog maum phauj & txiv dab laug. Personally, tu txiv xaiv is not as important as someone close and dear to my parents and siblings.

yuav npam ces yog maum phuaj & txiv dab laug foom xwb. Yuav zoo los yog maum phauj /txiv dab laug foom.



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Offline Reporter

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #11 on: August 03, 2011, 07:03:27 PM »
The Txiv Xaiv invokes deep emotions. Very good for a grieving time.



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Offline Xyooj-Man

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #12 on: August 03, 2011, 11:51:21 PM »
if you understand it it's sad but it's also your choice if you wanna actually get one to do it for the person that pass away got a cousin who didn't get one for his mom's funeral but it's up to you if it was my parents or grandparents it'll be nice to get one hear there last word before they really go... just my opinion.



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Offline MSV

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #13 on: September 02, 2011, 11:17:49 AM »
The Txiv Xaiv, and the foom koom is one of the most important aspect to a Hmong funeral. It's true that some pay ridiculous amounts for it, but we pay even more for even more ludicrous things. When I look at the Txiv Xaiv, primarily when they foom koom, I don't view it as the Txiv Xaiv blessing the survivors, but more of an eulogoy. He gives voices to the decease, telling the family what would of the been the decease's last words.
The Txiv Xaiv can bless the family as much as they want, but if the family does not act on it nothing will come of it. Just because he said some good things to you it doesn't mean you will get it. You have to go out there and get it for yourself, the blessings will guide the way.

I like that part.  Cov txawj mloog ces khaws tau cov lus nyiaj lus kub coj mus ua neej, cov tsis txawj mloog ces mloog nkag sab no tshwm sab tov lawm xwb os.

+1

I believe the txiv xaiv's role should never leave the funeral rituals. It is essential in the grieving process. Mloog cov lus txiv xaiv hais mas tu siab heev. Tabsis nws ho pab tau yus ua ib siab tias tus neeg yus hlub thiab nco npaum li cas los lawv mus tiag tiag lawm es kom nyob los ua zoo es lawv thiajli tso siab mus thiab. I know it was comforting words to me even though I cry.



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Offline yuknowthat

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Re: Taking Out Txiv Xaiv of Funeral session
« Reply #14 on: September 02, 2011, 12:33:30 PM »
because pretty much what i get out of it is..

1)memories of the hardship your mother and father took to raised you up to be where you are today
2)nej nyob sib hlub, txhob sib ntau sib ceg cuag li miv thiab aub sis tog, luag luam yaj txhob nrog luag luam yaj, rau siab kawm ntaub kawm ntawv thiab muab yus lub zog coj mus khwv thiaj li tau noj.
3)nej nyob sib hlub, txhob mus ze luag poj ze luag nyab, txhob deev luag tej txiv, txhob mus ua tub sab tub nyiag, txhob mus twm txiaj yuam pov, ntxob mus quav yeeb quav tshuaj , txhob mus quav deb quav cawv..



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