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Author Topic: On my exciting and amazing journey to the stars.....  (Read 381583 times)

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Ajax616

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Re: On my amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1035 on: January 18, 2014, 12:19:59 PM »
One of the most amazing thing that I was able to come across and hope to learn is, "The way is not in the sky, the way is in the heart."



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Ajax616

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Re: On my amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1036 on: January 19, 2014, 05:44:54 PM »
What if the fear of death itself, is a tool for survival.  We are conditioned to fear death only so that we will live in this life and fulfill our purpose.



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Ajax616

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Re: On my amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1037 on: January 20, 2014, 12:07:16 PM »
Neat opening scene.




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WordGirl

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Re: On my amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1038 on: January 20, 2014, 05:28:45 PM »
What if the fear of death itself, is a tool for survival.  We are conditioned to fear death only so that we will live in this life and fulfill our purpose.

Hi,

I read this the other day and thought to myself, very true. I thought about it today and it makes me angry, it made me break down, and cry.  :-[

I’m heartbroken today because life can be taken away from us so quickly and without warning. A tool for survival…do you realize how many people live believing their purpose is yet to come? How many people tell themselves death can be the release from life’s purpose? What about the people who LIVED because someone was their purpose? What happens when death decides to take your purpose for living?   :'(

Sorry, for the emo rant! Thank you for letting me type...for making me cry. I needed it. So, thank you! 


« Last Edit: January 20, 2014, 05:30:49 PM by SMH »

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Ajax616

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Re: On my amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1039 on: January 20, 2014, 06:53:41 PM »
We defend our lives, because it's the only thing that we ever knew so far. It's us as far as we can remember, but there's more.‏  We cannot be allowed to know that which is more or else we may give this life and move on.



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Ajax616

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Re: On my amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1040 on: January 20, 2014, 06:57:07 PM »
Hi,

I read this the other day and thought to myself, very true. I thought about it today and it makes me angry, it made me break down, and cry.  :-[

I’m heartbroken today because life can be taken away from us so quickly and without warning. A tool for survival…do you realize how many people live believing their purpose is yet to come? How many people tell themselves death can be the release from life’s purpose? What about the people who LIVED because someone was their purpose? What happens when death decides to take your purpose for living?   :'(

Sorry, for the emo rant! Thank you for letting me type...for making me cry. I needed it. So, thank you! 

The purpose has to come from within through understanding, then it can never be taken away.  That is why I wrote it.

You're welcome.  I also believe when we cry something dies and a new door opens, I hope your opens up for you as well.



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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1041 on: January 21, 2014, 06:16:38 PM »
Wow...
 
I didn't know it's now classed as mental illness.

http://screen.yahoo.com/new-york-times/china-39-junkies-124730949.html



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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1042 on: January 21, 2014, 06:40:49 PM »
The monster in me is very contained, through my understanding that we all will get nothing in the end of this journey and it best to give all the love and kindness that we have, so please stop rattling the cage.  Because it will not work. :)



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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1043 on: January 23, 2014, 07:35:26 PM »
I heard this one lazy Saturday morning, and it got stuck in my head.......





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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1044 on: January 25, 2014, 08:17:39 AM »
I think for the first time in my life, I finally met the personificatio n of EVIL, and I am telling you that it does not wear a hood and a scarred face or carry a sword ready to strike, it's looks is very deceiving and very easy on the eyes and very innocent, but it lacks a conscience and will say and do anything to anyone at anytime.  As there is no real evil in the world, the formal psychology term for it is NPD.



« Last Edit: January 25, 2014, 10:04:24 AM by Ajax616 »

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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1045 on: January 25, 2014, 09:53:24 AM »
The Buddha explained how to handle insult and maintain compassion.

One day Buddha was walking through a village. A very angry and rude young man came up and began insulting him. "You have no right teaching others," he shouted. "You are as stupid as everyone else. You are nothing but a fake."

Buddha was not upset by these insults. Instead he asked the young man "Tell me, if you buy a gift for someone, and that person does not take it, to whom does the gift belong?"

The man was surprised to be asked such a strange question and answered, "It would belong to me, because I bought the gift."

The Buddha smiled and said, "That is correct. And it is exactly the same with your anger.

If you become angry with me and I do not get insulted, then the anger falls back on you.

You are then the only one who becomes unhappy, not me. All you have done is hurt yourself."

"If you want to stop hurting yourself, you must get rid of your anger and become loving instead. When you hate others, you yourself become unhappy. But when you love others, everyone is happy."

The young man listened closely to these wise words of the Buddha. "You are right, o Enlightened One, "he said. "Please teach me the path of love. I wish to become your follower."

The Buddha answered kindly, "Of course. I teach anyone who truly wants to learn. Come with me."
Read more at http://www.funzug.com/index.php/stories/how-to-handle-insult-maintain-compassion-story.html#4E3RHMXmKBxUwYxM.99



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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1046 on: January 25, 2014, 09:58:24 AM »
Lack of empathy is one of the most striking features of people with narcissistic personality disorder. It's a hallmark of the disorder in the same way that fear of abandonment is in borderline personality disorder.

"Narcissists do not consider the pain they inflict on others; nor do they give any credence to others' perceptions," says Dr. Les Carter in the book Enough of You, Let's Talk About Me (p. 9). "They simply do not care about thoughts and feelings that conflict with their own." Do not expect them to listen, validate, understand, or support you.

This is exacerbated when the person has a touch of antisocial personality disorder. Then it becomes frightening, as in this all-too-common example. A woman says:

    He would abuse the dog in front of his 11-year-old daughter by repeatedly pushing the shocking collar and making the dogs wail. The daughter would scream and wave her hands and if I hadn't been there to take the control away from my husband I don't know how long he would have kept doing it.

Let's look at what this means on a more moderate basis. Here are examples from partners of narcissists:

    He would actually get mad at me if I was sick. I said, "I sat here with you for days when you were depressed and couldn't get out of bed. And now you can't even be a little nice to me when I am sick?"
     My partner would hurt my feelings just when things were going well. When I would question him about it, he would make up excuses and tell me I'm wrong for feeling the way I did, and if I didn't like it there was something wrong with me.
    I could spend an hour detailing how I felt hurt and she would sit there, cold as ice. When it was her turn to speak, she tore down every word that came out of my mouth until I had to apologize for expressing how I felt. I ignored this red flag and made excuses to myself and others.

Note that narcissists can pick up on social cues and can "fake it" when necessary. Aside from looking "normal," the hope is that they will get something back. Partners said:

    He has made adaptations that allow him to "appear" to be thoughtful and concerned about others. Early in our marriage, he would ask me what I would like to do. Then one day it dawned on me that while he asked, we never ended up following my suggestions! When I mentioned this to him, he had a crestfallen appearance and behaved like child who had been caught doing something wrong.
    I think that faux empathy stems from a number of things. A need to fit in, socially--to appear like a feeling, caring person is certainly one of them. In some cases, it's probably an acquired social skill, albeit a superficial one. Like learning which utensil to use when dining in polite company. In other cases, it's a means to getting what you want from people.
    She had "intellectual" empathy:  almost as if she knew she should react that way. She didn't feel it at the soul/being level. She knew the words, but couldn't hear the emotional music of our relationship.

This lack of empathy is so foreign to us--even some animals show evidence of empathy--that shocking instances can break through the denial and the hoping that one day we will get our turn. While it may leave us outraged, hurt, and feeling betrayed, it can be an eye-opening incident that we really need to acknowledge the limitations of individuals with NPD. As painful as it can be, though, we no longer feel as confused by the push-pull (or in some cases, just the push).

In my own life, my moment of truth came when an arsonist burned down my garage to the bare foundation. It happened in the middle of the night, and my family practically had PTSD from awakening in the middle of the night to see flames shooting up to the sky. The neighborhood lost power. We lost both cars and everything stored in the garage, including some priceless sentimental objects. The insurance only paid half of what we needed to put up a new garage.

After I mentioned this twice to the NP in my life on the phone, s/he got bored and made it clear s/he wasn't interested in prolonging the topic. Although s/he lived 20 minutes away from me, s/he never bothered to come over and see the damage or see how my family was doing.

Since this way of living is so foreign to us, if we have someone with NPD in our life, we need to understand how they think. One NP explains it this way:

    People are tools to be I use to get what I want. No one cares what a hammer or nail thinks, nor do we even notice anything unique about them unless they don't work right. The only nail I would notice is one that bent when I hit it with a hammer. Just as it should be. Really I was not that callous, but if I could use someone to get me what I wanted, I would. And rarely would I feel guilty about it. I mean if I played you, you should have been paying more attention. You'll get over it.

Narcissist and author Sam Vaknin (Malignant Self Love--Narcissism Revisited) reveals:

 The narcissist lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others.

 I am aware of the fact that others have emotions, needs, preferences, and priorities - but I simply can't seem to "get it into my mind." There is an invisible partition behind which I watch the rest of Mankind and through which nothing that is human can permeate. I empathize more with my goldfish than with my "nearest and dearest."

    To me, all people are cardboard cut-outs, sophisticated motor contraptions, ersatz and robotic. I know how I should feel because I am well-read--but I cannot seem to bring myself to emote and to sympathize. I care more about my material possessions and belongings than [almost] any man or woman alive.

    Over the years, I have deciphered the code. I have learned to imitate and emulate expertly the more common affect and expressions of one's inner landscape. But this veneer is easily breached when I am frustrated or humiliated ("narcissistic injury"): the mask slips and the real Me is out: a predator on the prowl.



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Ajax616

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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1048 on: January 25, 2014, 04:28:39 PM »
"All emotions are positive.....t hey point at a need that needs filling."



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Ajax616

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Re: On our amazing journey to the stars.....
« Reply #1049 on: January 26, 2014, 12:19:08 PM »
Rule 1. Understanding is for love and kindness, not for being right.

Rule 2. Please refer back to Rule 1.



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