Vim kuv tsis paub.

[MSV]

Booked for the weekend! Ohyo. I'm going to be exhausted.

[MSV]

Kuv nco koj. Kuv nco koj. Kuv nco koj.

If I say it enough times, maybe...just maybe...this message will make it to you. I hope you know that I miss you so much tonight. Tau ntau hnub no koj ciali plog ntsia to tsis hais ib los rau kuv paub. Kuv kuj ntshai tsam koj lam muab lub siab phem mus ua tej yam yuav ua kuv los kua muag xwb. Tabsis vim kuv twb hais tias kuv mam li ua lub siab loj nrog koj ces kuv mam li nyob tos. Txhob mus ntev tsam kuv khiav lawm nawb.

*****

I've been knocking out at 10pm lately...what's up with that?

[MSV]

I am with doubt and I feel like I am in need of some direction, hope and a little reassurance…

Mother's Day is coming up. What to do for my mom this year???

[MSV]

MSV, who do you miss..?

hehehehe. That's a secret.

How have you been? I've been meaning to still snap a photo of my garden for you. We'll see if I rememeber tomorrow. Anyways, we've been getting a lot of rain here lately so my babies are growing quite nicely. I should hurry...

[MSV]

I got so bored that I started a new backyard project. I'm tearing up the whole yard and replanting grass. Those dang weeds are too hard to keep up with. I just mowed the lawn a few days ago and the dandellions already managed to reach 5-6 inches high now. WTH! This time they look ever uglier because they've turned into this dirty maroonish-brown color. Ewwww. I'm on another mission to destroy them all. I took a look at our neighbor's lawn and it looks so pretty. Need to get there....

I had a dream about one of my brothers last night. I dreamt that I was hahaing at him for being selfish. I told him his gf shouldn't be his world because someday he'll need his family and if he doesn't realize that than he's dumb. I yelled at him and said some pretty mean things about his gf. All of sudden my brother starts crying. He is wiping his tears with kleenex and then I noticed chunks of blood coming out of his nose and mouth. Instead of running over or panicing, I just continued lecturing him.....I wonder what it all means?

Work is really picking up. I've been coming home drained. Today I felt so stressed and frustrated. I was so close to screaming at people who called my line.... I need a long vacation. Need to get away and just breathe. I'm going to request some time off this summer.

[MSV]

Too much grubbing on the weekends. This whole month has been like this. If I keep this up I'll end up packing on 10 lbs by the end of the summer. I'm glad all the baby showers, weddings, gatherings, etc. have all quiet down. Shoot, grad parties are around the corner. Ohyo!

Happy Mother's Day today to all the beautiful moms in the world. Today the siblings and I just cooked a great feast for my mom. We ate and kept it simple. I guess as the years go by we start running short of new ideas to do. Maybe for next year I'll plan something a little better....a weekend get-a-way?

Having second thoughts...gro wing hopeless. Is it really worth it anymore? I need a sign....

[MSV]

Kuv tuaj txog tim haujlwm hnub no es I’ve been sitting here dazed this whole time. Kuv xav mus tsev tamsimno….just crawl back into bed and sleep until my body is happy. I’m feeling super unmotivated and unproductive. Yog tagkis zoo li no dua xwb ces ntshe kuv yuav dag tias mob tob hau kom tau nyob tsev xwb poj…? I’m beginning to think this is another sign I really need to just take a detour from my busy work life and find time to relax. I’ve especially been mentally and emotionally drained. *yawns*

Craving for something sweet. I want a slice of cake from Bravo or Café Latte.

[MSV]

Friends come and go but my sisters...they have no choice...they're stuck with me. lol. I'm blessed to have so many sisters. Without them, I'd feel so lonely.

[MSV]

Me too.. I'm super happy that I have 4 sisters whom I can share things with and do things with. We all very close.

OMG, I tell ya…we are so similar. I also have 4 sisters too. Are you my long lost twin? Anyways, in terms of sharing...do you often find yourself shopping in their closets, jewelry boxes, makeup sets too? All of my sisters and I have our own tastes and interests in everything but somehow we make it work for all of us. Honestly I don’t really feel a need to have too many close friends because I’ve already got my sisters. I love them.

*****
I can’t wait to be wearing summer dresses!


I was out shopping at Target a few days ago and fell in love with this particular one. It’s simple…just how I like my clothes. I think I need to go back and get it. It’s been at the back of my mind this whole time. Best part to it all is that I found a coupon for $3 off too. Sweet! 

 
This dress from Maurices is super cute too!

[MSV]

Did everyone in the office just decide to take a vacation today? The office is dead silent. Kuv mam li nyob ua si hauv PH kom txog caij kuv mus tsev xwb mas. In fact kuv mam li tawm ntxov thiab. Today will be an easy-going day. That’s the best part to Fridays…aside from pay days.

So sleepy.

[MSV]

I got into an argument with one of my little sisters last night when we went walking. She's been angry with the world, negative in her thinking and plain down right mean and loud when interacting with guys. I just told her that maybe she just needs to go out and keep herself occupied with other things so she can snap out of her state. I think she's unhappy with how her relationship turned out with that one boy from Oklahoma so she thinks this is how she should cope with it all. She got really offended with everything I said and went off about how I don't know her. Of course I may be under my own assumptions but the family notices it too. We've made attempts to hint at her but sometimes the best route is just be direct. I feel kinda bad being like that but she needs to hear it. I know she's not like this.....it's just a stage she's going through to get over that boy but it's affecting our family too. I hope she'll understand that I didn't mean to put her out but rather make her realize it's not healthy....I hope she comes around.

[MSV]

I like recording the dreams I recall...this one was from last night.

I dreamt that my mom, one of my sisters, and I were eating out at this crowded Chinese restaurant after a long day of shopping. When we were just about done, the waiter brought us the tab and I looked at the receipt only to realize they totally overcharged us. With a mouth full of food, I stood up and demanded the waiter recalculate everything we bought. As I was trying to figure out how much I still owed, I saw this handsome guy at the corner of my eye. His figure was familiar but I couldn’t make him out. Anyways, he handed the waiter $19 to cover for the remaining charges. I turned my head to glance at him and smiled while thanking him. He got his navy blue coat, grabbed his girl's hand, and walked out of the place afterwards. Then my mom says to me, “Naib, tus tub ntawd yog leej twg es ua cas nws hos lam muab nyiaj los them rau peb cov mov? Koj puas paub nws?” And then….and then….that figure finally came to me. It was KPX! How could have I forgetten him? As soon as I remembered, I ran after him. I got out to the parking lot and tried to track him down. Everywhere I looked I just saw random Hmong people walking around. My heart was beating because I wanted to see him right then. I was about done searching when all of a sudden to my distance left I see a car with someone sitting in there. “Is it him?” I thought to myself. The guy looked over and noticed me so he got out of his car. It’s KPX! I ran over to him and hugged him. He didn’t say one word but just embraced me. After being nestled in his arms for a few seconds, I tilted my head up and asked him where he went all this time. I asked him if he was happy with his girl…..I asked him if he forgot about me. He told me he was still with his girl but he never stopped thinking about me. He told me that if I had allowed myself to fall in love with him….we could have been in each other’s arm all the time like this. The dream became a blur after that….

It’s been so long….I don’t know why KPX came to me last night. Maybe he got married. *sighs*

I secretly long just to be in someone's arms. All my life I've always carried all this weight...troub le....tears... ..on my own. I wonder what it would be like to have a protector....

[lilly]

Aww, MSV and Sweet_Tears, you girls are so lucky to have sisters!  I want sisters too.  I hope in my next lifetime I'll have sisters like you two. 

[MSV]

Aww, MSV and Sweet_Tears, you girls are so lucky to have sisters!  I want sisters too.  I hope in my next lifetime I'll have sisters like you two. 

A few days ago I got into a dispute with one of my sisters and we didn't speak for a day or two. In that time of silence with each other, things felt off. Today she called me really early in the morning and our talk before work made me almost teary. I don't know about everyone else but I can't imagine my life without my sisters. They've shaped a great part of me. The love I have for them...it's endless. Perhaps you're like my mom....she grew up with my two uncles only. Even to this day she still wishes she had sisters somewhere to share things with. I told her she may not have a sister but she got herself a houseful of daughters instead. 

We can be the ph sisters.

Yog lawm mas. Ua PH sisters los tau!

[MSV]

ST,

Nov yog rau koj saib os. You can tell it needs a little tender, love, and care. lol.