Tubpojntxoog,
You are incorrect when you say that people from the same clan don't know each other. Perhaps the younger generation have no idea who their extended families are but ask any important elder in a clan and he'll know which subgroup belongs where. Without disclosing my clan, I once met a woman with the same clan name who asked which subgroup I belonged to. Right away she knew of my subgroup's leader even though I had only met her for the very first time. The problem is that nowadays the younger generation doesn't know their own history so they become strangers in their own clan. I suggest you learn more about your clan and the pertinent leaders of your clan's past. You will see that they are all connected.
Honestly, the only people opposed to our clan system (which makes us unique from other groups) are one or two things:
1. outsiders of their own clan
2. come from a bad clan
I don't know how you draw the line that I'm incorrect when I never said that same clan people do not know each other. Do I have to draw the line when I mean "biologically unrelated"? To me, anyone who is not from my great great grandfather that came from China to Laos five generations ago is a biologically unrelated. Sure, this is not a reasonable definition for generally acceptance when speaking of marrying the same clan. We Hmong will have to define what is and is not acceptable and who are to include and exclude if we agree to make the change.
Maybe it's a shock to you when you learned that someone in your clan whom you don't know can recognize your clan leader, cousins, uncles, and sometimes even your dad. I grew up in that kind of world, so it is normal to me--and I know the reason to that. If we trace back in time, then we were all related at some point--not just Hmong but all human beings on earth.
I'm not sure what you mean by "subgroup", but I guess you are talking about what we Hmong called "thooj dab koom qhua", especially " txhim, or nyuj dab". I can tell you that if we are talking about this, then I have several thousand people who are related to me this way. And these people and me are anywhere from one to fifteen generations apart. I'm sure it is the same thing for you.
Believe_N_Me, I know you don't like to change when it comes to this issue. But don't you recognize that we are living in the 21st century now? If we keep practicing these kinds of primitive cultures, what would other ethnic groups think of us? The reason our sons and daughters do not want to speak Hmong and learn any of our culture anymore is because they see our culture as the "lower culture" that is not up to the modern way of life. We have to change in order to survive. This issue is one of the many issues in our society that needs to be changed. Remember, we only change for the better, not the worse.