jokes, jokes, and more jokes

[tRouBLe]

true and funny at the same time

Exactly.   

Lame 

But I know you thought it was funny.   

A quiet man, is a thinking man
A quiet woman, is usually mad

Was this suposed to be funny because I forgot to laugh.      

[tRouBLe]

PL goes to a library.   《==amazing, I know   

PL: I want the book, "Men - The most perfect, intelligent, and strong." . . . .
Librarian: Comic section is at the backside.

 

[tRouBLe]

A masked man walks into a bank and holds it up at gunpoint to rob the bank. In the process of robbing the bank, his mask fell off. The robber quickly put it back on his face and asked the teller directly ahead of him if she saw his face. She admitted that she did, so he shot and killed her. He then turned to the teller that was beside the one he just killed and asked if he had also seen his face. He said that he did and the robber shot and killed him too. He then turned to a woman, a customer who just happened to be in the bank when the robbery was taking place. The robber asked the customer if she had seen his face. The customer replied, “No, but I’m pretty sure my husband did.”

    

[Giggles_Shyly]

A masked man walks into a bank and holds it up at gunpoint to rob the bank. In the process of robbing the bank, his mask fell off. The robber quickly put it back on his face and asked the teller directly ahead of him if she saw his face. She admitted that she did, so he shot and killed her. He then turned to the teller that was beside the one he just killed and asked if he had also seen his face. He said that he did and the robber shot and killed him too. He then turned to a woman, a customer who just happened to be in the bank when the robbery was taking place. The robber asked the customer if she had seen his face. The customer replied, “No, but I’m pretty sure my husband did.”

    

LMBO, cause and effect in the favor of the witty woman. Talk about being in the right place at the right moment

[Giggles_Shyly]

What do you call a man that lost all of his intelligence?
 
A widow.

 

[Giggles_Shyly]

Why Men Are Like Computers:

10. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
 9. A better model is always just around the corner.
 8. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
 7. It is always necessary to have a backup.
 6. They’ll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
 5. The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
 4. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
 3. The lights are on but nobody’s home.
 2. Big power surges knock them out for the night.
 1. Size does matter.

[tRouBLe]

GS, those would have been perfect for PL's "Sexist Jokes" thread.       

[tRouBLe]

ProudLao goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor I have this problem with passing gas, but it really doesn’t bother me too much. It never smells and it’s always silent. As a matter of fact I’ve passed gas at least 20 times since I’ve been here in your office. You didn’t know I was passing gas because it doesn’t smell and it’s silent." The doctor says "I see. Take these pills and come back to see me next week." The next week ProudLao goes back. "Doctor," he says, "I don’t know what you gave me, but now my passing gas… although still silent, it stinks terribly." "Good", the doctor said, "now that we’ve cleared up your sinuses, we’ll start to work on your hearing."

    

[Giggles_Shyly]

  got me laughing silently to myself

[tRouBLe]

got me laughing silently to myself

If you're referring to the joke about ProudLao...... .yeah, he has this thing with gas and smelling.  Hahaha.      

[proudlao]

Exactly.   

But I know you thought it was funny.   

Was this suposed to be funny because I forgot to laugh.      

It's funny to me and that's all that matter 

[proudlao]

LMAO thanks for sharing. Hilarious.

[tRouBLe]

Giggles_Shyly: How do you know when a man is about to say something smart?
trouble: When he starts his sentence with, “A woman once told me…”


    

[Giggles_Shyly]

Giggles_Shyly: How do you know when a man is about to say something smart?
trouble: When he starts his sentence with, “A woman once told me…”


    

LMBO, every man started out smart because he came from a woman where he ends up.... depends if he was taught by a woman or another man

[tRouBLe]

The mother of a problem child was advised by a psychiatrist, "You are far too upset and worried about your son. I suggest you take tranquilizers regularly." On her next visit the psychiatrist asked, "Have the tranquilizers calmed you down?" "Yes", the boy's mother answered. "And how is your son now?" the psychiatrist asked. "Who cares?" the mother replied.