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Author Topic: jokes, jokes, and more jokes  (Read 87453 times)

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Giggles_Shyly

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #360 on: July 30, 2015, 07:51:06 AM »
Tai Lau a police officer attempts to stop a car for speeding and ProudLao gradually increases his speed until he's topping 100 mph. ProudLao eventually realizes he can't escape and finally pulls over. Tai Lau approaches the car and says, "It's been a long day and my shift is almost over, so if you can give me a good excuse for your behavior, I'll let you go." ProudLao thinks for a few seconds and then says, "My wife ran away with a cop about a week ago. I thought you might be that officer trying to give her back!"

Men :2funny:



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Giggles_Shyly

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #361 on: July 30, 2015, 08:09:00 AM »
 ;D :2funny:



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Giggles_Shyly

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #362 on: July 30, 2015, 10:36:40 AM »
Tai Lau's teenage boy comes home and announces that he wants to marry the girl next door, Jane Jones. Tai Lau takes him aside and says, ‘I’m sorry, son, but years ago I was having an affair with Jane’s mother and I got her pregnant. You can’t marry her because she’s your half-sister.’ A month later his son comes home and announces that he wants to marry a girl up the street, Sarah Smith. Again Tai Lau confesses that he once had an affair with Mrs Smith and that Sarah is in fact another half-sister. A month later the son announces his engagement to Amy Armstrong, but once more Tai Lau confesses that Amy is in fact another of his daughters. His son complains to his mother. ‘Dad’s driving me crazy,’ he says. ‘Every time I fall in love with a girl it turns out she’s one of Dad’s daughters.’ ‘Oh pay no attention to him,’ says his mother. ‘It’s not like he’s your real father.

 :D ;D :2funny:



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proudlao

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #363 on: July 30, 2015, 11:29:08 AM »
Quote from: Giggles_Shyly on July 30, 2015, 07:45:20 AM
I can't see it :(

You can't see because there were no pic to begin with  ;D IQ issue? :D



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Giggles_Shyly

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #364 on: July 30, 2015, 11:30:54 AM »
Omg, I was tricked! >:( ProudLao just you wait >:D



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Offline tRouBLe

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #365 on: July 30, 2015, 07:13:18 PM »
 :2funny:    ;D



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Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. ~ John Wooden

Offline tRouBLe

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #366 on: July 30, 2015, 07:18:14 PM »
ProudLao was so depressed thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, his savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc., that he called the Suicide Lifeline...... .he got a call center in Pakistan.  When he told them he was suicidal, they got really excited and asked if he could drive a truck.    ;D



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Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. ~ John Wooden

Offline tRouBLe

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #367 on: July 30, 2015, 07:44:51 PM »
Tai Lau was changing the oil on his wife's car. Suddenly, his wife bursts into the garage. "Careful," she said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more oil! Oh my gosh! You're pouring too much at once. TOO MUCH! Slowly! TURN THE CONTAINER NOW! We need more oil. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE OIL? They're going to overflow! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're changing the oil! Never! Turn it! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to clean the cap. You know you always forget to clean the cap. Use the screw. USE THE SCREW! THE SCREW!" Tai Lau stared at her. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to change the oil?" His wife calmly replies, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving."

 ;D   :D



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Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. ~ John Wooden

Offline tRouBLe

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #368 on: July 30, 2015, 07:48:53 PM »
ProudLao and his many blonde moments.....

“I got a compliment on my driving today,” said ProudLao to his friend, VillainousHero . "There was a note left on my windshield and it said 'parking fine.' "

 :idiot2:   ;D



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Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. ~ John Wooden

Giggles_Shyly

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #369 on: July 31, 2015, 11:01:39 AM »
Good ones Trouble :) got me laughing ;D



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Offline tRouBLe

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #370 on: August 01, 2015, 10:00:47 PM »
Tai Lau shook Dr. Giggles_Shyly's hand in gratitude and said, “Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will.” “That is very kind of you,” said Dr. Giggles_Shyly emotionally, and then added, “Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I’d like to make a little change.”

 >:D   ;D



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Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. ~ John Wooden

Offline tRouBLe

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #371 on: August 02, 2015, 01:36:43 PM »
ProudLao's type of interview and/or sales.....  ;D

ProudLao was at a job interview today when the manager handed ProudLao his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me." So ProudLao put it under his arm, walked out of the building, and went home. Eventually the manager called ProudLao's mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!" ProudLao said, "$100 and it's yours."



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Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. ~ John Wooden

Giggles_Shyly

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #372 on: August 03, 2015, 09:04:20 AM »
LOL, making sure he lives a LONG TIME, right ;) ;D Trouble!



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Giggles_Shyly

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #373 on: August 04, 2015, 07:54:50 AM »
Hahahaha Tai Lau :knuppel2:



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Offline tRouBLe

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Re: jokes, jokes, and more jokes
« Reply #374 on: August 04, 2015, 09:11:33 AM »
Quote from: Giggles_Shyly on August 03, 2015, 09:04:20 AM
LOL, making sure he lives a LONG TIME, right ;) ;D Trouble!

 ;D    :D

Quote from: TAI LAU on August 04, 2015, 07:42:28 AM
we're not just best of friends but with benefits...she added viagra to my prescription.  ;)  :-*

 :o    :-X    :D

Quote from: TAI LAU on August 04, 2015, 08:30:48 AM
The story goes...Trouble was married to an Laotian gentleman and they lived in Vientiane, Laos. The poor Hmong lady was not very proficient in Lao, but managed to communicate with her husband.

The real problem arose whenever she had to shop for groceries. One day, Troubles went to the butcher and wanted to buy pork legs.  She didn't know how to put forward her request, and in desperation, lifted up her skirt to show her thighs.

The butcher got the message and Troubles went home with pork legs. The next day, she needed to get chicken breasts. Again, she didn't know how to say and so she unbuttoned her blouse to show the butcher her breast. Troubles got what she wanted.

The 3rd day, the poor lady needed to buy sausages. She brought her husband to the store... >:D :idiot2: :2funny:

 >:(   Me and living in Laos do not mix well.  ;D    :P



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Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. ~ John Wooden
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