I think todays hmong women...the "educated" ones with nice jobs...

[thePoster]

You know, the ones that I guess you consider "strong"...


I think...they actually dont like guys who...

Well guys who..for lack of better words...guys who are beneath them...

Just my personal observation...

So its just from my own personal experience...v ery few though..but they do end up the same way...

I do come across as a very low brow person...

Ill continue more later!  As I must rush back to doing low brow work!

[Blongforever]

"Guys who are below them"

You'd think women would have grown wiser as they gained more money and power? 

[thePoster]

Well ok, like I said... I can only speak from my few experiences...


There's not much...

But they kinda seem the same..

I know I come off as a really dumb person in real life sometimes..

That I'm not that intellectual or smart...

That I really don't have much to say...

That I'm not really good at conversation.. ..

That I'm pretty quiet....

That maybe there's not much up there(you know the brain department)

So pretty much... like I said... I know sometimes I really come off as someone who's kinda dumb...

Also, my job's not the greatest...

In my opinion, it's not that impressive at all..

I don't really drive a "nice" car...



And a few of these girls... they're really smart too, they are holding "1st" world country jobs.  Doing things with their lives.. going places if you will.  They have nice cars etc... materially speaking, they're good to go.

To compare me to them, where they are in life and what they've achieved on a scale of 1-10, I'd say they're 8's and up.. I'm like 3 and below.

I don't want to say that they think they are better than me.. 

But it does seem like they'd prefer someone who's actually more on their level.  Which is not a bad thing...



I guess I could be more, or at least appear more accomplished, Speak more eloquently, do more with my life, etc etc...but you know what?  That's just not me...

And honestly... for me anyways...

Sure I won't speak much or talk much... but there's a reason, it's like... I don't see a point in it..  Yes I could talk about myself, but personally, I don't find it interesting, maybe I'm wrong and it'd be interesting to some girl.. but I don't think so... so I don't see a point in talking about myself etc... and even amongst a number of things... current events, politics, etc etc etc...

I'll talk about something if I find it "fun" to talk about... like fishing, reeling in that big fish!, or cars, basketball, sports and that's about it.

I think even sometimes, the way I speak, it probably comes off as very child like, not adult like, or not professional.. . or I guess you could say... not really suit my age...

But then .... I feel like... "why am I going to start talking prim and proper!  It always seems like an act!"  .....   I always feel like "man!  Just talk normal!"

Obviously I'm not going to change...

But you know, the way I do come across to the opposite sex... It kinda open my eyes a bit to how hmong girls are nowadays..

Well some of them, I'm sure not all of them, but it does seem that they do want a guy and even at least just dating, who is more on their level. 

I'm not going to say the men are intimidated by "strong" hmong women, it's more like, they won't even see us!

Yikes!

So guys, if yalls wanna nab a hmong girl nowadays...

You gotta fix yourself!

Speak proper.

Be/appear intellectual.

Spread your peacock feathers...fla unt yourself a bit, obviously not excessively but enough to show them you're a guy going places by.. I guess dressing a big nicer have a few nice material things... 

You should be good to go after that.

Hmong girls aren't really looking for that simple guy anymore... they want a 21st Century hmong guy who's made it in America with that 1st world country job!

[thePoster]

This skit here!


See dave chapelle...

I'm like him!

and hmong girls are like... those girls and that one guy....



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SHG0ezLiVGc

[nchan]

Well ok, like I said... I can only speak from my few experiences...


There's not much...

But they kinda seem the same..

I know I come off as a really dumb person in real life sometimes..

That I'm not that intellectual or smart...

That I really don't have much to say...

That I'm not really good at conversation.. ..

That I'm pretty quiet....

That maybe there's not much up there(you know the brain department)

So pretty much... like I said... I know sometimes I really come off as someone who's kinda dumb...

Also, my job's not the greatest...

In my opinion, it's not that impressive at all..

I don't really drive a "nice" car...



And a few of these girls... they're really smart too, they are holding "1st" world country jobs.  Doing things with their lives.. going places if you will.  They have nice cars etc... materially speaking, they're good to go.

To compare me to them, where they are in life and what they've achieved on a scale of 1-10, I'd say they're 8's and up.. I'm like 3 and below.

I don't want to say that they think they are better than me.. 

But it does seem like they'd prefer someone who's actually more on their level.  Which is not a bad thing...



I guess I could be more, or at least appear more accomplished, Speak more eloquently, do more with my life, etc etc...but you know what?  That's just not me...

And honestly... for me anyways...

Sure I won't speak much or talk much... but there's a reason, it's like... I don't see a point in it..  Yes I could talk about myself, but personally, I don't find it interesting, maybe I'm wrong and it'd be interesting to some girl.. but I don't think so... so I don't see a point in talking about myself etc... and even amongst a number of things... current events, politics, etc etc etc...

I'll talk about something if I find it "fun" to talk about... like fishing, reeling in that big fish!, or cars, basketball, sports and that's about it.

I think even sometimes, the way I speak, it probably comes off as very child like, not adult like, or not professional.. . or I guess you could say... not really suit my age...

But then .... I feel like... "why am I going to start talking prim and proper!  It always seems like an act!"  .....   I always feel like "man!  Just talk normal!"

Obviously I'm not going to change...

But you know, the way I do come across to the opposite sex... It kinda open my eyes a bit to how hmong girls are nowadays..

Well some of them, I'm sure not all of them, but it does seem that they do want a guy and even at least just dating, who is more on their level. 

I'm not going to say the men are intimidated by "strong" hmong women, it's more like, they won't even see us!

Yikes!

So guys, if yalls wanna nab a hmong girl nowadays...

You gotta fix yourself!

Speak proper.

Be/appear intellectual.

Spread your peacock feathers...fla unt yourself a bit, obviously not excessively but enough to show them you're a guy going places by.. I guess dressing a big nicer have a few nice material things... 

You should be good to go after that.

Hmong girls aren't really looking for that simple guy anymore... they want a 21st Century hmong guy who's made it in America with that 1st world country job!

lol the irony.

[Giggles_Shyly]

It seems like you are talking about preferences only and we all know, EVERYONE (men and women) has them

Opinionated guess: Educated individuals with "nice jobs"often seek similar individuals because more often enough people who flock together tend to have more in common.

[Blongforever]

It seems like you are talking about preferences only and we all know, EVERYONE (men and women) has them

Opinionated guess: Educated individuals with "nice jobs"often seek similar individuals because more often enough people who flock together tend to have more in common.

You have just opened a can of worms if you want to go there....., but we don't want to go there don't we, GS?

[Giggles_Shyly]

You have just opened a can of worms if you want to go there....., but we don't want to go there don't we, GS?

I am just being honest here. No punt intended

[thePoster]

It seems like you are talking about preferences only and we all know, EVERYONE (men and women) has them

Opinionated guess: Educated individuals with "nice jobs"often seek similar individuals because more often enough people who flock together tend to have more in common.

But see...it makes the women look worst than guys!!

Thats the whole befuddling thing!


It use to be...if a guy was like that, as in not likeing a girl fow how she is, they guy would be ripped apart by other girls...

Now girls...acting how guys act...theres a weird gender double standard going on here.....

But hey, Im not going to change myself...


But in anycase...some times i see what these strong women are doing and....well..m aybe its becuase i think dofferently and have different priorities but...some of the things they talk about or do, im like "man, whats the point, thats stupid"..

Oh wells!

[Dom]

You know, the ones that I guess you consider "strong"...


I think...they actually dont like guys who...

Well guys who..for lack of better words...guys who are beneath them...

Just my personal observation...

So its just from my own personal experience...v ery few though..but they do end up the same way...

I do come across as a very low brow person...

Ill continue more later!  As I must rush back to doing low brow work!

Are you beneath them?

[Believe_N_Me]

No true heterosexual female can ever be a feminist for long because in her heart she desires an alpha male. This is why feminism is a lesbian's social cause. Lesbians can accept beta males because they don't plan to sleep with them.

 

[YAX]

You know, the ones that I guess you consider "strong"...


I think...they actually dont like guys who...

Well guys who..for lack of better words...guys who are beneath them...

Just my personal observation...

So its just from my own personal experience...v ery few though..but they do end up the same way...

I do come across as a very low brow person...

Ill continue more later!  As I must rush back to doing low brow work!

It's less work for them when the guy's on top, don't you think?

[zena]

I don't want to say that they think they are better than me.. 

But it does seem like they'd prefer someone who's actually more on their level.  Which is not a bad thing...

I guess I could be more, or at least appear more accomplished, Speak more eloquently, do more with my life, etc etc...but you know what?  That's just not me...

They are not better than you.  Just different.

Yes, people will always prefer someone at their level...level of understanding.  It's called compatibility.

You're right.  Pretending will only last a short while.  The truth always comes out.  That's probably why a lot of relationships don't work.  They try to impress their friends and family or believe they could be a certain way.  Never works.  Just be true to yourself and the right person will show up.

***

I had a similar conversation with my husband last week or maybe the week before.  It wasn't about boy/girl relationship but rather just people in general and how communication is really what it's all about.

By communication, I'm referring to language or the way a person talks and express himself/herself.  For instance, if you're a surgeon, the language you use on a daily basis will always surround medical terms.  It would feel uncomfortable to put yourself (a surgeon) in an environment like the ghetto because the language would be different.  One prefers a language that communicates thoroughly and exact, while the other (the ghetto) will use slang and words that are shortcuts and only their selective friends will understand.  This is an extreme example.  It doesn't have to do anything with work but it should paint an obvious picture of the differences in people. 

Everything you do in life all comes down to the form of communication you are familiar with and enjoy using.  Ever have to learn terminology that you hated?  It's because it's just not your thing.  You said you like fishing, well, if you like fishing, you must also like the terminologies used.  Some people don't care for fishing or its terminologies.

When you date a girl who loves makeup and perfumes, you don't necessarily have to like those things too.  But, you do have to have something or some things that you share a common liking to.  Maybe the two of you are on the same political spectrum or you both enjoy comedic humor.  Whatever it is, it has to be powerful enough to make you feel like it's your place...like you belong there.

[Believe_N_Me]

I think some of you are over-thinking this issue.

Women naturally look for men who make them feel safe and provided for EVEN IF SHE IS CAPABLE AND TOTALLY SELF-SUFFICIENT.

I am not talking about male chauvinists. There is no correlation that ambitious and highly intelligent men are automatically sexists. However, you don't need to be any of that to land an educated, intelligent, and successful woman.

If an educated and successful woman isn't receptive to you then it's because you aren't fulfilling these two things: security and support

However, this is how you can make such women feel those things about you:

1 - support her ideas, her dreams, her ambitions and really have her back by standing up for her when she faces opposition, criticism, and scrutiny from others.

2 - be stable, available, trustworthy, someone she can confide in, a good listener, a good therapist  - she is going to need you to be emotionally stable when she's experiencing inner turmoil and when she is doubting herself. She needs you to help her get out of her head. In other words, provide peaceful and safe spaces for her to recollect herself. 

[zena]

It seems thePoster is struggling with his identity.  He thinks he's not that smart but wants girls to come down to his "not smart" level.  Reading his thoughts here, it seems he's trying to figure out why he can't get a girl or the kind of girl he wants because they think they are too good.

My point was if he wants the girl he envisions, he needs to stop looking at the wrong girls, stop judging them, and stop judging himself.  It really has nothing to do with what a girl is looking for because obviously he's saying he knows what girls are looking, he just can't give them that because he can't help being "not so smart."  My examples are just for him to think outside-the-box.  It's not meant to be right or wrong but to really look inside himself and focus on what he's good at and what makes him come alive and go that direction.  He needs to stop putting himself down. No girls like that.  But, he also judges girls and compares them, putting the "uglies" down.  (I used quotes 'cause ugly could be inside too, not just outside).

And, I think it really comes down to language and communication (but not only that...of course there are always other factors).  The way a person talks and thinks and translates words is where that person will put themselves.

In other words, learn to stop judging girls and stop putting yourself down.  You're not dumb. You might do dumb things but that doesn't make you a dumb person (and besides, everyone does dumb things at some point in life, it's human nature).  Just be a cool kind dude and you will meet a cool kind dudette.  What you think about is a reflection of how you see yourself.  This has been said so many times.

btw, I didn't plan to go deep with my explanation but it does come down to language and communication because the way a person speaks (rhetoric) is tied to how they live and how they think.  I know, it's deep, but it has a lot to do with that.