Dok_Champa is right about this

[Believe_N_Me]

When it's the one, there is no need to chase.

The right one will be smooth sailing despite all the obstacles. Take for example some married couples that I know of. They may have lived out of state or even out of the country. One might have been just coming out of a divorce, or still finishing school. Whatever obstacles existed did not stop them from coming together. Why? Because both took actions to be together. The wedding was also smooth sailing, well as smooth as it can be for a Hmong wedding. Other than that, no big hurdles of any sort that would cause bitterness. In marriage, things can happen but they find a way to work through it together.

When it's the wrong one, the smallest obstacles become huge roadblocks. They never get off to a good start. They could be together for years but it never turns into any real marriage commitment. Something always interferes. Someone always stalls. On and on.  They could really love each other but it never goes beyond that, just fizzles out. Even if they do get married, problems amplify. Both are never really happy with each other.

[Visualmon]

What if that person is a zealot of God or an Atheist. Can anyone sustain her/his livelihood after the divorce?

[Reporter]

We have our fates and then our abilities, too. I think it's a combination of both that make a relationship strong.

[DuMa]

You act like fate is going to drop the one for me on my lap without me having to do anything.  While some might get lucky with that odds, most are not.  We still have to put in the work and once you get that someone, you still have to continue to keep that spark of fire growing.  Falling in love is just as pretty as falling out of love, let us not forget that.  While you are looking for the right one, they ended up being the right one for now.  This is the old aged question that no one has a definite answer for it and if you do can figure it out, it then be your equation for your own love life only.  It is not transferable to other people, not that I know of. 

So the bottom line is this.  We are all magicians of a different kind.  No one potion is universal that will work her magic the same for all.  Try and try different methods of pimping and do your best and pray that cupid is active and generous enough to get you that one.   pimping still isn't easy   

[Believe_N_Me]

From my personal experience as a woman, fate seems to be in control more than our abilities.

From a man's POV though, yes, you are more in control than fate.
 

[Believe_N_Me]

I'm a firm believer that men do not make mistakes when they choose to marry a woman. Even if that marriage is miserable or ends in divorce, they still picked her. The man makes a marriage happen, especially when it comes to Hmong weddings. There might have been some instances where the groom was fighting against a forced marriage, but 99.9999999% of the time a Hmong wedding cannot happen without the groom's consent.

This is why Dok Champa was right. If he wants you then he will take action and make it happen.

THIS IS 100% TRUE WHEN IT COMES TO HMONG MEN.

Just look at those Hmong men who kidnap a girl against her own will! That video of the girl in Sapa, Vietnam was crying her eyes out, kicking and screaming, and rolling on the ground not wanting to marry that guy. Yet, he STILL FORCED A MARRIAGE.

Hmong women, DO NOT WAIT FOR A HMONG MAN TO MARRY YOU. Hmong men are the last people on earth for you to have to convince.  If they wanted to marry you they would do so with or without your consent.